Chapter 1 – Prologue
Eager to get to the county clerk's office, Rena Lanford slipped through the nearly empty early morning streets of Cross Town with purpose in her stride. She had been waiting months for all the right paperwork to arrive in the mail, and now, with every form filled out and every signature dutifully applied, she could deliver the papers to the bureaucrat who would finally officially name her Mrs. Dias Flac. Finally, her legal name would match the one carved into the ring she wore on her left hand. Finally, she could complete the romance begun when Dias gave her the garland of daisies when the two of them were kids.
Rena had never felt happier, and for the first time in ages, her head felt clear. Only one man's image danced around in her imagination. Only one man demanded her focus and her passion and whatnot. She could forget Claude Kenni. She could forget Ashton Anchors. She could forget Ernest Raviede, Bowman Jean, and Leon Geeste. She could forget Celine Jules. She could even forget that smelly guy with the cat ears. Actually, she forgot him as soon as she was able to dump his flea-ridden hide off in the forest behind Mars Village. What a waste of space he was! And of course, on top of her traveling companions, Rena had to deal with Alen, Yul, Chris, and a whole host of other men who just refused to depart from her hormone-addled imagination. Why, Rena wondered, did she have to fall in love with every male she met (and Celine)?
But with the marriage license she would be picking up in a matter of minutes, she would be, at long last, firm within the bonds of monogamy. Rena imagined herself as the girl from a John Nash anecdotal illustration. Before, she had a whole host of men surrounding her, some of them even fighting over her, and they all sort of cancelled each other out, leaving her high and dry. With Dias, she might not have the same luxurious quantity of lovers and potential lovers, but she had more quality in her newfound security. She actually had someone she could call her own, even if he was a little on the quiet side, had the personality of a wet piece of cardboard, and dressed like something out of The Mikado. One of the girl characters in The Mikado. And he was more than a little dumb, and he had some sort of obsession with blood and guts and gore. Dias's best-selling novel, The Bloody Road, was definitely a niche product, appealing mostly to postpubescent boys with a thirst for realistic violence and a semiautobiographical tone.
She loved the guy, though. She always had. For a while, though, she had hated herself for loving all those other guys along with him. Why couldn't Dias be the only man in the universe, and why did she ever have to meet Claude? Ignoring the fact that without her meeting Claude, the Ten Wise Men would have destroyed the universe, leaving no men left anywhere, Rena still resented having given a portion of her heart away to someone other than her one true love. Sure, Claude was nice and honest at times, and he looked downright tortured whenever she thrown Dias in his face for almost no reason other than to try to make him jealous. And yes, she probably deserved to suffer a little after she led him on while hiding her affection for Dias deep down. But still, Claude caused her pain, even if that pain stemmed from her own irresponsibility.
The thought of her straying from the straight and narrow path of fidelity flitted through Rena's head for a second. If she had so easily tossed Dias aside before, or at least ignored him while she built up a romance with Claude, who was to say she wouldn't do it again with someone else? Goodness knows only circumstance prevented her from having at least seven or eight different boyfriends during her journey to stop the Ten Wise Men, and how much longer could she rely on that? Perhaps she would just have to learn a little discipline and self control.
Self control turned out to be one of the most important virtues Rena could conjure up when she finally reached the front door to the county clerk's office. Inside, the line to get anything done was already at least twenty people long, and it took Rena a moment just to find the end. Biting her lip out of frustration, she plodded over to the back and pulled a manila folder out of her purse. Inside the folder were Rena's marriage license documents; she leafed through them one final time to make sure everything was in order.
Almost an hour later, Rena finally found herself face to face with the clerk. A twinge of nervousness passed through her as she handed him her paperwork. It didn't go away while he thumbed through everything to make sure everything was there. It only got worse when he gave her another sheet of paper to sign.
"This signifies that everything is in order," he said to her. "Just sign here and here."
"What's this one for?" Rena asked, pointing at one of the signature blanks.
"That's so we know you really mean to take on a second husband."
"Oh," Rena said, and she reached for the ballpoint pen chained to the desk. Then: "Wait, second husband?"
"Correct, ma'am," said the clerk. "You are on record as being married to a Mr. Alen Tax of Salva."
"Since when?"
"He came up to file the paperwork a while back," said the clerk. "Strange fellow. Seemed pretty obsessed with you, but he had your signature."
"Are you sure it wasn't forged?" It took all of Rena's strength to remain calm.
"Absolutely." The clerk nodded his head.
I must have signed it while under his spell, thought Rena.
"So I need some divorce papers before this wedding can go through properly?"
"No," said the clerk, "you don't. As I mentioned, you just need to sign here to take on your second husband. Expellian law permits you up to twelve, by order of King Chris and Queen Celine. New law, you know."
Celine made a law like that? Rena sniffed.
"Okay, I'll deal with the divorce later. Is there anything else for me to sign?"
"That'll be all, Mrs. Lanford-Tax-Flac."
"Good. And it's just Lanford. Ms. Lanford."
"Oops," fumbled the clerk. "I guess I should have paid closer attention. You know how it is, working in an office all the time. Every day, same thing."
"Actually," said Rena, "my life has seen more than its share of excitement."
"Good for you." The clerk waved her away. "Next, please."
Excitement, thought Rena, and romance. And why shouldn't it have a bit more of both? Why should I divorce Alen at all?
Suddenly, for Rena, marriage became less a matter of settling and more a new adventure; less a matter of monogamy, and more a matter of living out every fantasy she had entertained throughout her trek to save the universe; less a matter of relaxing and more a matter of scheming. Claude, Ashton, Bowman, all of them—she could have each and every man she wanted. Rena's potential for happiness had increased tenfold in the span of an hour.
Forgetting that she was in a crowded room, Rena let out a gleeful cackle and a triumphant shout. "I shall have a harem!"
