This is one of my personally favorite chapters. And it is one of the longest ones, and it is also written by me. Hooray! I hope you guys enjoy it…just don't enjoy it too much.
Disclaimer: Heartdamoose and Kazooband, even if we morphed our heads together, would not be able to come up with the genius that we humans of the world call Harry Potter. And that's saying a lot.
Chapter 4: Four Different Reasons to Groan
By heartdamoose
The whole class gave off a groan that was so emotionally depressing that the cause of it could only be one thing: a test.
"Oh for heaven's sake, it's only a test!" said Professor McGonagall exasperated.
Hermione's hand shot up in the air.
"Yes Miss Granger."
"Professor, would you classify this test as a big one or small one?"
McGonagall stared. "A small test Miss Granger," she replied bluntly.
"What should we study?" she asked.
"You should study your notes on this chapter that hopefully all of you have taken."
Everyone's face besides Hermione's paled.
"Any other questions?" McGonagall asked, clasping her hands together.
Silence.
"Great. Everyone turn to page two hundred in your books and answer questions one through ten."
Another groan erupted from the class.
"I mean really, we have enough homework as it is, and then McGonagall decides to throw a test on top as well!" Ron complained as he, Harry, and Hermione walked through the third floor corridor to the grand staircase.
"Frankly, I don't see why you two are complaining," Hermione started. "McGonagall said it was a small test."
Ron stared at her. "Hermione, there is a big difference between small, and McGonagall small."
"Why would you even have a problem?" countered Hermione. "You took notes. You can use them to study with. You did take notes, didn't you?"
Harry and Ron exchanged hesitant glances.
Hermione stood in front of them with her arms crossed and an impatient foot tapping. "Out with it."
"Well, we did take notes," said Harry innocently, as if that alone would give him credit.
"Yeah, we did really," said Ron in support. "But then we were really bored one day…"
"Really bored."
"…And the notes were just there, innocently, tempting," Ron said as if his mouth were watering.
Hermione rose a single brow.
"They just looked so…flammable," added Harry.
Hermione stared at the both of them. "Wait, so you're saying that you burned your notes?"
"Well not burn exactly," said Ron.
"More like blow up in gigantic flames," informed Harry. Ron nodded.
Hermione looked like she was about to faint. "You blew up your notes. Fantastic. That's probably the most intelligent thing you've done all year. So, Mr. Dumb and Dumber," she said pointing at Ron and Harry. "What, dare I ask, are you going to do about this test?"
Harry and Ron exchanged glances once again. "Um…borrow yours?" asked Harry.
Hermione sighed. "Well, I guess it's better then not getting notes at all. Come on, we're going to be late for potions."
Harry and Ron both groaned.
Later on in the day, Ron walked down towards the Great Hall to meet with his friends for dinner. He was pulled aside by Professor Flitwick, before, to talk of some homework matters.
Ron walked quickly. He was already late enough as it was.
"Weasely!" hissed an all too familiar voice from an empty classroom.
Ron turned to face Malfoy with a glare as cold as a very cold mountain somewhere in the Alps.
"I have a favor I want you to do for me." He disappeared in the dark shadow of the classroom, apparently wanting him to follow.
Ron had quite a strong temptation to run from Malfoy and go to dinner, but fought against it. He would rather do a stupid favor for Malfoy then have the disturbing butterfly pictures floating around the school.
"What do you want Malfoy?" Ron spat.
Malfoy grinned coldly. In fact, the grin was so cold that it much resembled the temperature of Alaska during a world record snowstorm in the middle of winter if there was no sun in existence. But of course, if there was no sun, then all of the planets would much more resemble a whole bunch of rioting pin balls ricocheting off of each other in which we would collide with Jupiter and smash into many many pieces. So I guess there wouldn't really be an Alaska, and thus no existence of a snowstorm. So it probably wouldn't be so cold after all, and Jupiter would…
"Have you even been listening to what I've been saying Weasely?" demanded Malfoy.
Ron shook his head to rid his thoughts. "Wha…? No…I haven't. Do you mind saying it again?"
Malfoy sighed rather loudly. "I said I want you to steal Hermione's transfiguration notes so that I can ace the test."
Ron shook his head seriously. "I can't do that Malfoy, I'm already using her notes to ace the test." He paused. "And she's my friend," he added.
"Listen Weasely. Do you want those butterfly pictures all over the school or not?"
"…Not really."
"Then you better get those notes and give them to me tonight in front of," Malfoy looked around. "That statue," he said pointing to what looked like a rather fat hippo attempt to eat what seemed to be an old lady whole reading a big book and sitting on a rusty armchair.
Ron sighed. "Deal," he muttered coldly. He walked out of the classroom and towards his original destination.
"Ron what kept you?" asked Harry as he watched his friend sit down and pile an unnatural amount of food on his plate.
"I had an encounter with a rather annoying, jinxed wardrobe and had to fight to the death to free myself from its grasp," muttered Ron as he stuffed many mashed potatoes into his mouth.
"How…dramatic," said Hermione with a skeptical look.
Ron looked at her, feeling guilty. Of all the things that he didn't want to do, stealing her notes was one of them. It was cruel, and she was a really good friend. And besides, she will probably freak once she finds out. He wished he never managed to even summon his patronus. Well what is it Ron, friends, or keeping your secret safe? Now that's too hard of a question. And besides, why would Hermione even need her notes for the test? She probably already studied, or maybe she made a spare copy for emergencies. Truthfully, taking her notes would be for her own good. She needs to learn to relax. She's the smartest in the class anyway.
Okay, it's decided. I'm going to borrow Hermione's notes for her own good, and accidentally slip them to Malfoy.
"So Harry," started Ron innocently. "How has your day been?"
Harry stared in confusion. "Er…wonderful. Yours?"
"Bloody terrific," said Ron perhaps a bit too forcefully. "And what about you Hermione?"
Hermione's brows rose. "You've had all the same classes as me. Wouldn't you know how my day has gone?"
Ron laughed. "Of course I know how your day has gone. But I'm just trying to make conversation. You guys are so boring today. Say, let's go back to the common room and play some wizard chess, eh? I'll play winner." He nudged both of them with his elbows.
Hermione smiled, but sighed. "All right. I'm actually up for a game of wizard chess right now."
The three of them stood up and exited the Great Hall.
It was the perfect opportunity. Harry and Hermione were too transfixed in the violent game of wizard chess to even notice their surroundings. There he stood, next to Hermione's abandoned book bag, and her notes were quite literally sticking halfway out of it at quite an odd angle that practically screamed 'Take me I'm yours'.
Now or never, he thought as he chewed on his thumbnail. Hesitantly, he slipped the notes out of her bag and put them in his robes. He never felt so guilty in his life. He even felt guiltier then the time he gave Fred and George that homemade peanut butter covered…well…that isn't important. The point is, that he did something that he felt really bad about.
It's for her own good, he thought stubbornly.
"Hey guys?" started Ron hesitantly.
Harry and Hermione looked at him questioningly.
"I just realized that I forgot something at Charms. I'll be back…eventually."
"We'll go with you," said Harry standing up.
"No! Er…I mean, no. You guys look like you're having so much fun with your game. Wouldn't want to spoil it for a stupid errand. I'll be back soon."
Harry shrugged and sat back down, continuing the game again.
Ron exited out of the common room.
Then, all of a sudden…Ron tripped over nothing!
Oof.
"Aha! I got you!" exclaimed the Fat Lady with a shrieking laugh.
Ron held his head as he sat up. "What was that for?" he demanded angrily.
"For running into me before of course!" said the Fat Lady as if it were obvious. In fact, it was.
"Oh…so now we're even?" asked Ron hopefully.
The Fat Lady laughed loudly. "Of course we are!" she continued to laugh her over exaggerated laugh for about five minutes.
Within the first two minutes of the five minutes worth of laughing, Ron stood up and walked away towards the charms classroom. The portrait's laughter still echoed down the hall.
At last he arrived at the hippo…thingy. Malfoy leaned on it lazily; looking at his hair through a small hand held mirror. When he saw Ron come up, he folded the mirror and put it back in his pocket.
"Do you have the notes?" he asked darkly as if he was some type of smuggler asking for the money before handing the goods over.
Ron glared. He took the notes from out of his robes and handed them to Malfoy stiffly. "You better not make me do anything like that again."
Malfoy took out his mirror and examined himself thoroughly. "Deal Weasely," he said casually. "Now leave me to look at my beautiful face in peace."
Ron glared pointy daggers at him. "Oh go marry yourself," he snapped.
Malfoy smirked. "Don't mind if I do," he said laughing.
Ron rolled his eyes and left.
"Ron, do you know where my notes are?" asked Hermione panicking as she looked through her book bag for the umpteenth time during breakfast the next day.
Guilt lingered over him as he shook his head quietly.
"Why can't I find them! I swear I put them in here!"
Harry shrugged. "Hermione, you probably just misplaced them."
"I'm going to fail!"
Harry shook his head rolling his eyes. "Hermione, you're not going to fail. That's scientifically impossible. You probably studied anyway, right?"
Hermione lowered her head and shook it sadly.
"Well look on the bright side," said Ron. "We never study for our tests and look how successful we are."
…Silence.
"My. Life. Is. Ruined," she whispered hopelessly.
"Hermione, McGonagall said herself that it was a small test. It's probably not even worth one percent of your grade."
Hermione looked at Harry sharply. "You know how proportionally confused McGonagall is! She thinks that a small test is two hundred questions! My future is ruined!" With that, she raced out of the Great Hall with her book bag swinging behind her.
Ron stared. "Why is she so worried? She's going to ace the test anyway."
Harry shrugged. "I guess it's a Hermione thing."
Once all of the students were done with the tests, McGonagall corrected them magically and passed them back with the flick of her wand.
Hermione looked at her paper with a pale face. She shook her head sadly.
"What did you get?" asked Harry as he leaned over to see her test. Ron did so as well.
Harry's eyes widened.
"I know, isn't it horrible?" said Hermione miserably.
Ron looked at her as if she was mental. "Hermione. You have got to be kidding me. How is a ninety nine out of one hundred at all horrible?"
Hermione sniffed. "If I had my notes, I would have gotten that question right."
Ron looked at his paper. "Well, it's better then I got. What'd you get?" he asked Harry.
"Seventy nine," Harry replied.
"Aww, you beat me," Ron said. "I got seventy five."
"And guess what I got Potter," said none other then Draco as he walked over. "A perfect score." He waved the test in front of his face.
"Malfoy beat me?" said Hermione and Harry at the same time. Hermione looked like she was going to go into hysterics.
Ron looked at Malfoy angrily. "You know Malfoy, I think the only reason you got a perfect is because someone of intelligence lent you their brain…and their notes."
Malfoy smirked. "Funny. And I see that, by the score of your test, a…oh let's just say butterfly…lent you their brain as well?"
Ron paled. Oh…he's good.
McGonagall rapped her wand on her desk to silence the class. "Now, for homework, I want you to write a two foot long essay on the African wizard culture, and why it is a tradition to always transform mice into smashed bits of crayon."
A hearty groan rolled through the class.
That was a pretty fun read, eh?
I would hate to write about the African wizard culture and their traditions to transform mice into smashed bits of crayon.
Yummy.
Replies:
Kuyaga: I'm sorry that you are puzzled. The pictures everywhere was a daydream. The picture that Malfoy took is a picture of Ron with his patronus butterfly flying around him. Malfoy is using it to blackmail him. Are you still confuzzled?
Silver-star-0: Why yes! Blackmail! Malfoy will make him do many things. Just wait and see…
