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Memories or Nightmares – Chapter 8"Airman Kramer? Airman Kramer?"
The soft voice almost seemed to float through his thoughts, gently encouraging a response. An angel. The voice was pleasant and soothing and had to be one of an angel. How had he made it to heaven? Wait a minute. An angel wouldn't call him Airman Kramer, but he knew he had to be dead.
He opened his eyes to find Teyla's face looking down on him from just a few inches away, an icepack pressed to the side of her battered head. He blinked for a few seconds and tried to lift his head to look around. "I'm not dead?" he asked, the disbelief evident in his voice.
Teyla smiled. "No, you are not dead. We are very much alive and very luck to be so."
He rested his throbbing head back on the ground, taking note of the fact she was sitting on the rocky soil beside him. The gray light of dawn was filtering down through the trees, allowing him to view his surroundings. Her face and arms were a myriad of bruises and scrapes, her left eye swollen almost shut as she pressed the cold pack next to her cheek. He could see Lorne standing several yards away, his left arm in a sling and a bandage around one side of his neck. He was directing a large number of soldiers about the activities taking place around him. "What happened?"
"The team from Atlantis arrived and managed to eliminate all of the Wraith. They are trying to treat the wounded and get everyone ready for transport back to Atlantis."
"Hey, soldier, you're awake." Kramer shifted his attention to Dr. Strauhan, who had settled in beside him. The right side of his face was already showing signs of heavy bruising and there didn't appear to be much skin left on it either. His right eyes was beginning to swell and turn black and a field dressing hid something that was probably worse just over his right eye. Speckles of dry blood mottled the side of his face and shirt.
"You okay, Doc?"
"I'm good. Looks like I'll be giving Carson a chance to practice his stitching techniques when we get back. Now, let's have a look at you. What hurts?" Nick had already started to probe the sides and back of Kramer's head.
Kramer winced as Nick found a lump on the back of his head. "Gotta bump here."
"I probably hit my head on the ground when the Wraith threw me. My chest and side are what really hurt."
Nick lifted Kramer's shirt and whistled. It was only then that Kramer realized that someone had removed his vest. Nick began to probe his chest, causing Kramer to tightly close his eyes and hold his breath as pain shot through his chest and side. Nick slowly made his way down to Kramer's lower abdomen, bringing tears to the man's eyes. By the time the exam was completed, Kramer was almost gasping for breath.
Nick pulled his shirt back down. "You've got some really nasty bruises and probably some cracked ribs. We'll need to take some x-rays when we get back to be sure nothing is broken. Fortunately I don't see any sign of internal bleeding."
"Glad to hear that." He looked around, but didn't see the litter with Sheppard. "What about the Colonel?"
Nick's expression sobered. "He's not doing so well. As a matter of fact, I'm about to head back to Atlantis with him and the rest of you will follow in a bit. You're my last patient to check for life-threatening injuries. I'll have one of the nurses wrap your ribs and give you a little something to knock the edge off the pain until you get to the infirmary. Major Lorne has a team to escort me and Sheppard and one other critical patient to the gate and we should probably get going."
"Doc, is he going to be okay?"
Nick hesitated. "I don't know. It could go either way." With that, he stood and walked over to a nurse, giving her instructions before he left.
"He will make it," said Teyla.
Kramer looked doubtful. "But Dr. Strauhan said –"
"Dr. Strauhan is an excellent doctor, but he must base his answers on his medical training. I base my answer on Colonel Sheppard. If you give him a fighting chance, he will prevail. Colonel Sheppard will survive, of that I have no doubt."
Kramer smiled. "Mind if I hold you to that?"
Teyla smiled warmly at him. "You may count on it."
"You're Athosian, right?"
"Yes, I am."
Kramer hesitated and then decided to dive right in. "When we get back, would you mind telling me about the Athosians? I'd like to start learning more about the Pegasus Galaxy and our allies."
Teyla tilted her head forward. "I would be happy to share my people with you. We have a rich and proud history."
"Thanks." Kramer relaxed and prepared to wait for the nurse, not really wanting to move much, thanks to his protesting ribs.
oOo
Every step Nick took reverberated through his skull. He was now certain there were little gremlins with big mallets in his head, pounding away to beat of his footsteps. Unfortunately, his stomach was beginning to churn in protest. This was starting to look more and more like a concussion, which meant he'd be sleeping in the infirmary tonight instead of working there. Maybe he could convince Carson to let him work, and if anything happened, he'd already be in the infirmary. That just might work.
The path ahead suddenly seemed to tilt dangerously to one side and he felt himself stumbling as he lost his balance. The soldier walking next to him caught him by the arm and supported him until he got his legs back under him.
"Doc, you okay?"
Nick nodded once and then moaned as he put his hand to his forehead. "Oh, not a good idea. Yeah, I'm okay. Just got a little dizzy."
"We can sit down for a minute if you'd like."
Nick looked down at Sheppard. "No we can't. We don't have the time. I can make it."
The soldier nodded. "We aren't far now."
A few minutes later, he saw the sergeant who was leading the group turn his radio on, making him realize that he didn't have his any more. He must have lost it when the Wraith hit him. He leaned down over the injured soldier being carried in the litter next to him and checked his pulse. The man's head was covered in bloody bandages and Nick was pretty sure he had a skull fracture.
The sergeant turned to him. "We'll be to the gate in a few minutes. They're dialing it up and informing Atlantis to have a medical team ready."
"Thanks."
Nick hurried his steps to catch up with Sheppard's litter. As he drew up beside it, they broke through the trees into the low morning sunlight scattered across the field. The tall grass waved gently in the breeze, making for what would have been a peaceful scene if they weren't trying desperately to save two lives. Nick breathed a sigh of relief when he saw the gate up ahead, the blue puddle already shimmering. Two soldiers stood by the DHD, watching them walk quickly toward the stargate.
Nick leaned over to check Sheppard's pulse one more time. It was faint, but it was there. He let his hand rest gently on Sheppard's chest. After a few seconds, he suddenly shouted at the sergeant. "Tell Atlantis Sheppard's stopped breathing and they need to be ready to intubate. Come on guys, hurry." The sergeant fell out of step with the others and got on his radio while the men carrying Sheppard's litter began to move faster, the adrenaline rush pushing them past their exhaustion. Several seconds later, they rushed through the gate and into Atlantis and a waiting medical team.
oOo
Kramer winced as the nurse finished securing the wrappings around his ribs. He was trying to figure out if he could still breathe when he felt a sting in his shoulder.
"This should help with the pain until you get back to Atlantis. Don't be trying to lift anything or do anything strenuous until Dr. Beckett's had a chance to x-ray those ribs."
"Lift anything?" he said incredulously. "I can't even breathe, much less lift anything."
The nurse smiled at him. 'Well then, I guess we can trust you to follow instructions, unlike a certain Colonel we all know." She picked up her bag and moved on to the next patient.
Kramer looked at Teyla, seated next to him on the fallen log. "If cracked ribs hurt this much, I don't even want to know what broken ribs feel like."
"They are very painful. Colonel Sheppard could tell you more. I believe he holds the record for the most broken ribs since coming to Atlantis, at least that's what I have heard."
Kramer grinned. "Somehow that doesn't surprise me."
Ronon and McKay walked up to join them. Ronon had a bandage covering his right forearm and McKay was limping heavily.
"I saw Nick take Sheppard a while ago. When do the rest of us get to go home? My ankle is killing me. I think it's broken."
Ronon sighed. "I heard the nurse when she wrapped your ankle, McKay. She said it was only a sprain."
"Well, what does she know. She's only a nurse, after all."
"More than you," deadpanned Ronon. Teyla and Ronon exchanged a grimace.
Kramer just grinned, enjoying the brief return to normalcy. "Okay, guys, I need to find Mark and see how much trouble he's in." He started to get up, but Teyla put a restraining hand on his shoulder.
"Airman . . . Jack . . . you should know that . . . there were some deaths."
Kramer felt his insides drop like a rock as he looked at Teyla's sad expression. "Mark?" he whispered.
Teyla nodded sadly.
Kramer's gaze dropped to the ground and he bit his lip so hard he drew blood, fighting the emotion he felt surging up inside. He closed his eyes tightly and just kept thinking, not Mark, please not Mark. He could see Mark's face in his mind, that goofy grin he gave every time Kramer had come up with some lame plan. He clenched his fists tightly, hitting himself in the thigh, willing it to be a nightmare and knowing that it wasn't. Feeling a hand on his shoulder, he looked up to see Teyla, a single tear streaming down her face.
"I am so sorry you have lost your friend. I have lost many loved ones to the Wraith and I know that it is not easy. But remember, you also have new friends to help you get through this. We will be here for you."
"I lost my world and almost everyone I know to the Wraith. It's not easy, but you will survive. Let your grief and your anger at them fuel your determination to destroy them." He could see the pain in Ronon's eyes and he knew he meant what he said, that he was not just trying to pacify him.
Kramer wiped the tears from his face. "I . . . I want to see him."
Teyla shook her head. "No, you do not. The Wraith fed on him and he does not look as you remember."
Kramer shivered, feeling suddenly chilled from the inside. He remembered the body from the village and seeing another soldier killed by a Wraith. He knew with certainty that his friend had died a horrible, agonizing death and he hadn't been there to help him. He suddenly got up and lurched to a tree several feet away, heaving until he thought his insides would surely join the puddle on the ground.
He clutched the tree trunk for dear life as the world spun wildly around him, sure that at any moment it would fling him off. A wet cloth was pressed to his face and he gladly took it, wiping the sweat and vomit and tears. He stood with his forehead resting against the rough bark, allowing the uneven texture to help ground him. Finally, he opened his eyes. Teyla stood beside him, her brow furrowed and her eyes dark.
"I have to see him. I have to know."
He saw understanding in her face and she nodded. He followed her as she led him across the camp and he was aware that Ronon and Dr. McKay tagged along behind. He saw Lorne in his peripheral vision, watching him go to say good bye to his friend. The major bowed his head silently as Kramer walked by and he was grateful the man didn't say anything. There was nothing to say.
They stepped around a pile of brush to find four bodies laid out side by side, each covered respectfully with a blanket. Teyla walked to the one on the far side and pulled the blanket back. Kramer gasped and was grateful he'd already emptied his stomach, because if he hadn't, he most surely would now.
"How do you know it's him? It doesn't look like him." His pleading voice wavered like that of a small child and he was aware that he was grasping at straws. They wouldn't have told him if they hadn't been sure.
"Dog tags," said Ronon from behind him.
Of course. Poor body condition was one reason they wore dog tags. Sometimes war wasn't pretty. The body looked like that of an old man in really bad health and a lot of pain. His face was contorted in what could only be described as unbelievable agony. His paper-thin flesh seemed to be stretched across feeble bones with very little muscle between. How could he have let his friend down so completely?
"Can I have a few minutes alone?" He was barely aware that the hoarse voice didn't sound at all like his.
"We'll be just over there. Call us if you need us." Teyla rested her hand on his arm for a few seconds before moving off to join the others.
Kramer eased himself to the ground to sit beside Mark., barely noticing the pain it sent shooting through his ribcage. He looked at the ground in front of him because it was easier than continuing to look at what was left of his best friend. "You were always worrying about me, telling me that I was going to get myself killed. Well, buddy, look who got themselves killed first. How can you do this to me? How can you go and leave me in a god-forsaken galaxy a billion miles from home by myself? You know I need a keeper and that's your job. What the heck do I do now?"
He sat in silence a few moments, letting the anger that had built subside and be replaced by sadness and guilt. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry I didn't have your back like we always swore we'd do for each other. I'm sorry I'm such a screw-up. Mostly, though, I'm just sorry you're dead." He felt the tears begin to flow again and this time he didn't try to stop them. He just bowed his head and cried, mourning the loss of the best friend he'd ever had.
oOo
Carson was expecting Sheppard to come in unconscious and not breathing, but he was not prepared for a very battered Nick. He recovered quickly, however, and began to intubate Sheppard as soon as the litter was set on the floor with Nick assisting.
"How long?" Carson asked.
"Maybe two minutes, tops."
"Okay, I've got it. Let's get him to the infirmary." Carson hurried along side the stretcher as they rushed Sheppard and the injured soldier to the infirmary. Elizabeth touched Nick on the arm as he started to follow the group, and he turned to face her.
"Nick, how's John?"
"Not good, but his chances just got better by being in Atlantis. We can give him better care here."
Elizabeth nodded. "What are we looking at in casualties and injuries?"
Nick sighed. "We lost two men at the gate and four more where they caught us. Sheppard and the soldier we just brought in are both critical. Everyone else has mild to moderate injuries – strains and sprains, cuts and bruises, a few broken bones."
Elizabeth nodded toward Nick. "It looks like you got your share."
"Yeah, I did. One of the Wraith introduced me to his friend, Mr. Tree."
Elizabeth winced. "You better get to the infirmary before Carson sends out a search party."
"Yeah, I'd like to check on my two patients before Carson makes me one of his."
Elizabeth nodded as Nick turned and headed down the corridor toward the infirmary. She fervently desired to go to the infirmary and check on Sheppard herself, but she knew she needed to stay here and coordinate the return of the rest of the party. She wished they would hurry because she wouldn't really relax until everyone was home, safe and sound.
TBC
See – no cliffy this time. You guys deserve a break.
