Author's Note: I love you all! Thanks for reading. The next chapter will be the last. So sad that its almost over. Oh well. Read and review. Love Zephie

OH! Big thanks to my reviewers!

Disclaimer: I really don't own it at all. The song Is by Peter Gallagher called Still I Long For Your Kiss. I don't own that either!

Warnings: SLASH! That's about all folks. ENJOY!

Chapter 17

Still I Long For Your Kiss

Logan's POV

I was sitting in my room thinking about the day that Chase died. That was three days ago. His funeral is tomorrow; the gang's coming and all of his living relatives will be there. The thing is, if he hadn't died, he'd still be gone. He'd be out of my life. I could tell by the look on his face when he left that he was leaving for good. I know he wanted to break up with me; there is no doubt about it.

I wish that he had stayed and listened to what I had to say, if he had he wouldn't be dead and maybe we would have worked our problems out and we'd still be together. But this hopeful thinking is pointless. All I know is that I have to be prepared to speak at the Departing Ceremony tomorrow morning.

I'm thinking about writing a song or singing a song. I've been told that I can sing. I'm not brilliant but I can hold a tune. Besides, it's the thought that counts.

I went straight to work on the perfect song that described the beautiful relationship between Chase and I and how it ended. It was beautiful. I fell asleep going over the tune in my head.

At the Departing Ceremony…

I sat in the front pew and watched as people slowly started arriving. It was a closed casket, his family didn't feel the need to show off his dead body, and I'm glad they felt that way; I don't think that I could have handled seeing him like that again.

The casket was a white with a silver trim. His family thought that it would represent his youthful innocence; they obviously don't know what we've been up too.

I stared at the picture that was propped up on top of the casket next to the roses that elegantly decorated it. It was of Chase, fairly recent too. His outrageously curly hair was slightly covering his bright blue eyes. I missed the way his eyes would light up every time he saw me. Mine would do the same each time I saw him too. I miss him, a lot.

I looked over to the door to see Zoey, Nicole, Dana, Quinn and Michael walk into the church. I was hoping they wouldn't notice me, but the odds of that were slim. They saw me and walked over to sit by me. This row had been designated to Chase's friends as he had very little relatives that were still alive.

"What are you wearing?" Zoey freaked out looking at my suit.

"A suit." I answered simply.

"But this is a funeral, you should wear black." Nicole said in awe.

"Listen, I knew Chase better than all of you combined. This is what he would have wanted me to wear." I explained as I straightened mauve tie. It went well with my deep violet suit. It was close to black and you couldn't tell it wasn't unless you were staring at me.

"It's true." Dana added in, in my defence. "I knew Chase pretty well also." She blushed and sat down beside me.

In silence we waited for the service to start.

The service started and all were silent, well basically. Every so often a sob would be heard from on of the many guests. I don't know why they're crying. They didn't know him like I did. They didn't love him like I did.

By the time I got up there to talk about Chase my face was stained with many tears. I stood looking out at the churched filled with people. Some I knew, some I didn't, but they were all here for a reason, and that reason was Chase Matthews.

"The other day the world lost someone special." I nodded towards a picture of Chase. "Chase was great friend. My best friend, the only friend I could trust with my life, my most secret secrets. He meant the world to me. And he knew that. I didn't know if I would be able to express how I felt about him just by taking so I wrote a song. I will now sing it for you, for Chase.

I know I shouldn't but I want you so bad
I know it couldn't be but I want what we had
I know our love is gone and I can't bring it back
Still I long for your kiss
Still I long for your kiss
I know it's over cause you told me so
I tried to leave but I can't let you go
I can't believe you don't want me no more
Still I long for your kiss
Still I long for your kiss
The days go by but they don't seem the same
I cry and cry and I call out your name
I go downtown I see your face
Nobody around can take your place
You put me down
You turned me away
Still I long for your kiss
Still I long for your kiss

The days go by but they don't seem the same
I cry and cry and I call out your name
I go downtown I see your face
Nobody around can take your place
You put me down
You turned me away
Still I long for your kiss
Still I long for your kiss." I finished singing to an awed audience.

Then I realized I had just sung about kissing Chase, and very few people knew that. Oh well, maybe they won't figure it out. I walked back to me seat and sat down. My friends stared at me but I didn't care any more. There was no Chase anymore. And I will miss him more than anything.

We returned to the house Chase's aunt's house for refreshments and I couldn't help but wonder if everyone was staring at me. They all knew my secret now. But to hell with all of them, its not like they should have the right to judge me. They need to take a second glance at there own first.

I returned home that evening and ran straight up to my room before my mom could question me about the song. I fell asleep on my bed in my violet suit.

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