I must make one correction on my age list. Erik is now 34. There are nine years between him and Christine. I do apologize.
This is not an exciting chapter, but a needed one.
Enjoy.
THE DAWN THROUGH THE NIGHT
Book III – Getting to Know You, Chapters 11-17
CHAPTER 13
Christine arrived back at Brigitte's with Jean Luc asleep in her arms. She laid him down in his bed, took her coat and bonnet off, and sat down at the kitchen table for a cup of tea.
Brigitte and Madeline sat quietly, watching her complete her tasks, before inquiring as to how the interview went.
Christine was being unusually evasive, having not said two words since she walked back in the door; but her eyes held a certain light that indicated she was not pleased with what had taken place.
"Christine, come on…how did it go?" Madeline asked, her smile a replica of Erik's.
Christine looked into the face of this woman and saw the features of the man she had known for years, but who was still a mystery to her. Her eyes were a different color, but the shape was there; her hair was the same wavy, black tresses that Erik had, and the shape and proportions of the face were his also. Erik was definitely her son.
"There were issues that could not be resolved...he would not give me the job." Christine stated, not quite ready to reveal the entire chain of events.
Brigitte looked wounded, "He? He who?" She asked impatiently.
Christine hung her head and spoke in a quiet tone, "The father, that's who."
Brigitte and Madeline shared concerned looks, Christine looked as though she was ready to collapse at any minute; what had happened to make her seem so diminutive?
"What about the father?" Madeline asked, curious as to why this man had rejected Christine.
Christine shrugged her shoulders and felt her throat constrict, she spoke to herself, not caring that Madeline and Brigitte had no idea of whom she spoke. She would not be able to keep this a secret, so she opened up.
"I never thought he would center that explosive temper on me…but I could see it in his eyes, those beautiful, all-consuming eyes. I'm sure he despises me." She whispered into the air. "I miss my angel and friend."
"Christine…who was this man?" Brigitte injected; there was only one man whom Christine called her Angel. An aggressive pounding began in her heart, "Tell us everything."
Christine looked up with cloudy eyes; she wiped her tears, not sure where to start in a tale that had to be told.
She looked straight into Brigitte's eyes, willing her to read her mind; but finally she murmured, "Erik." Her tone was barely above a whisper, "The father is Erik."
Madeline dropped her teacup and it shattered into a million little pieces. Her hand flew to her mouth in disbelief.
"What did you say?" Madeline asked, hardly believing what she had heard, but praying she had heard correctly.
Christine raised her eyes and sadly smiled through the tears, "Erik is Grace's father."
"He's alive and living right here in Paris." Madeline stammered, leaning over the table at Christine.
Christine got up and went to the woman and put her hands on her quivering shoulders, "He hasn't been here long, he is still unpacking." Her features were strained, "He is a renowned architect and has been commissioned to do a job here in Paris."
"Yes, he's a brilliant architect." Brigitte repeated…she liked the sound of that. "He has a daughter?" Brigitte asked, still in shock. "Why would he need a governess if he has a wife?"
Christine shook her head, wondering the same thing, "The housemistress only told me that Grace's mother died in childbirth."
There was a moment of complete silence as they all grieved for the love that Erik had lost. Christine remembered the look in his eye; loss and pain lingered there, they had been a part of him seven years ago, and they were still a part of him now.
Madeline began gathering her things, and headed for the door. Christine stopped her, "Madeline, where are you going?"
"I must go to him…he needs me." Madeline said, in the same determined tone Erik used most of the time.
"Madeline...listen…he doesn't know that you are here or that we've been looking for him…I am not sure he wants to see you." Christine stated.
Brigitte recovered from the state of shock she had gone into, "We have to talk to him…set things right…" She had that stubborn, willful look on her face that Christine knew all to well.
"No Brigitte, we have to let him be. There was fury in his eyes and in every step he took; he was so cold and indifferent toward me…as if I were an annoying pest buzzing in his ear." Christine cried. "If he can barely tolerate my presence, what is he going to do with you two?" Christine reasoned, "We abandoned him when he needed us most."
Madeline came to Christine and calmed her, "His daughter is my grandchild." Madeline reflected, feeling the ache in her heart to hold her granddaughter in her arms.
"He is very protective of her…as he should be." Christine exclaimed, "I don't think he will take too kindly to our invasion into his life."
"Children need mothers, Christine," Brigitte insisted, "Surely he knows this and will reconsider your plight." Her eyes took on a distant shadow, "I cannot understand why he is made to endure such pain."
"How does he look? Has he been taking care of himself?" Madeline asked, still wanting to know about the man who was her son.
Christine didn't make eye contact; instead, she sat quietly for a few seconds and finally replied, "He has not aged a day; in fact, I'd say he looks younger than he did seven years ago." She smiled, remembering the yearning her body felt at the sight of him. "He seems to have spent time outdoors, his skin is tanned and healthy looking…he's put on some weight, but he still looks too slender."
Madeline smiled through her tears…she did not deserve to know him, and yet, every fiber of her body reached out to him from where she stood to wherever he was at that moment.
"He had always been so slim at the opera house…he never ate well and he wore the loneliness like another set of clothes." Brigitte added, "I am so anxious to see him."
"I am not sure he will want to see any of us, ever again." Christine stated with such sadness.
Brigitte and Madeline both agreed with that, knowing that could very well be the case.
OOOOOOOOOOOOO
Erik sat in his study, willing the headache to recede, but it was no use. He laid his head down on the desk, cushioning it with his folded forearms. He heard the door open slightly, and looked up to see who it was.
Grace stood at the door looking very put out. She moved slowly toward him, never losing eye contact. Erik felt the guilt creeping into his spine and knew he was in for it.
She crawled up into his lap and placed her small hand on the side of his face, staring deep into his eyes. She wrinkled her brow and cocked her head.
"Why did Ms. Christine leave here with sadness in her eyes?" She asked, knowing he would tell her.
Erik closed his eyes to the pain he saw in his daughter's eyes. He had not intended for any of this to happen. He had always prided himself on keeping Grace happy and content, and now, he could not give her the one person she wanted most…Christine.
She was even more beautiful than she had been all those years ago. What was he going to do? She could take Grace away from him in a matter of days, claiming he was an unfit father and should not be within two feet of her.
"Christine and I are old acquaintances, Grace." Erik began. "I wanted more from the relationship than she did and she made sure I understood that." He finished.
Grace thought about that short, but descriptive answer. "You love her?" She asked.
Erik looked at her assessing, all-to-mature eyes, "I did…once…a long time ago." He admitted. "She broke my heart…"
"Don't people deserve a second chance, Papa?" She said with bright eyes, "That's what you have taught me and it's what I hear in Sunday school every Sunday."
"But Grace, she could take you away from me…" Erik pleaded, holding her tightly against him.
She pulled back from him and smiled the most beguiling smile; it reminded him of Desiree. "Papa, that's silly…no one will ever take me away from you." She promised, "Please bring her back…I want her to be my governess."
Erik bowed his head, knowing he had lost that argument. It was ironic really; he could barter back and forth with the most intimidating executives and attorneys, he could stare down a raging bull – but he could not beat three feet of feminine guile when she put her mind to it.
OOOOOOOOOOOO
The next morning, Erik was in a particularly sour mood, having gotten no sleep the night before. He kept thinking about Grace's words and the light he saw diminishing in her little-girls eyes when he made excuses for not hiring Christine.
He wasn't sure if his heart would survive her intrusion back into his life, but for the sake of his daughter, he had to try. Swallowing his pride and going to her was going to be the hardest lesson of all.
Nancy was cleaning the living area when Erik came in. She immediately noticed that he had a concerned look on his features, one she had not seen for some time.
"She was perfect, Master Erik?" Nancy confirmed, not understanding why he pushed her away; she was the perfect candidate for the job. "She would make a great governess…and that little boy is adorable."
When Erik didn't respond, she went up to stand in front of him. He stood with his arms crossed over his chest, and his right hand rubbed his chin as proof that he was deep in thought.
"You know her, don't you?" Nancy asked, seeing the substantiation in his eyes.
Erik looked at her, allowing her to see the slight indication that she was correct in her assumption.
"She's the reason I left Paris in the first place." Erik finally declared.
"You and she have a past?" Nancy pressed.
Erik smiled sadly, "No…I mean nothing to her…" His eyes took a distant gaze, "…but she was everything to me." He turned his back on Nancy, hiding his telltale eyes, "I did everything I knew to gain her love, and eventually…almost lost my sanity…" He bowed his head and closed his eyes, "…I let her go into the arms of the man she loved."
"Master, I've never seen nor heard you act as you did toward that poor girl…she's hardly more than a child…" Nancy stated, "…you, of all people, should have compassion on her…you loved her."
Erik knew she was right, he had changed…or tried to change; since Desiree had spent, what little time she had been granted, trying to make him a better man; she had felt him worthy enough of her love and wanted to marry him…shouldn't that be enough?
"Correction Nancy…I love her…and I always will." Erik corrected, the anguish still buried in his eyes. "But she must never know."
Nancy moved closer to him, adding her strength to his. It was the first time in the seven years she had known him that he had admitted to loving anyone other than Grace.
"She won't hear it from me…but Grace loves her too, Master Erik…what are you going to do?" She asked.
"What I must, Nancy…what I must." Erik murmured.
He put on his hat and cape, grabbed his umbrella and walked out the door. This was not going to be a pleasant encounter, but he knew it had to be done.
TBC
