Disclaimer: The author does not own any trademarks used or referenced in the story.

Author's Note: Another drabble originally posted on DCMK Fanfiction Discord - prompt = patience. Modified slightly from the original but the concept remains intact. Just a little banter that needed to be expelled into digital paper. It doesn't have the same depth or unique touches as my other offerings, but I had a lot of fun putting something simple together in the middle of the ongoing grind.

The bit about Yuki's Casebook is admittedly more self-referential than anything.


Not a Light-bulb Moment

Ai didn't want to ask for help. She really didn't. But with their side of the world gradually averting from the sun and the professor nowhere in sight after receiving several complaints about his egg maker not working as advertised (based on the nature of the complaints, this was a complete understatement), she had to do something about the blown out light bulb in the living room. Even with her shrunken body, she figured she could still do it by herself. It was bound to take more effort and time for sure, but no matter how tall she was, it wouldn't make things any more complicated than it was.

If only she didn't get caught by her nosy neighbor while she was busy pondering how to drag the stepladder out of the garage. In retrospect, knocking on his door would've solved the problem much sooner, but the figment of pride inside of her had long decided that having to put up with his pretenses was more annoying than minding trivialities like burnt out bulbs.

"I wonder how long I'll have to wait until you finally square with me," Ai mumbled, looking on as Subaru Okiya twisted the bulb in place. With his long limbs, he didn't need to scale more than a couple of rungs to reach the problematic fixture, accomplishing in no less than minute a chore she'd mulled over for at least a quarter of an hour.

Not surprisingly, the bespectacled man still managed to glean on her words. "I'm afraid I don't understand what you're saying, princess," he replied, his eyes trained at his own hand as he secured the bulb in.

The young biochemist sighed. "There's that too. I keep telling you not to call me 'princess,' especially when I couldn't count on you to be a loyal, and honest, subject at all."

"That's not true. You could always count on me..." Satisfied with his handiwork, the engineering student descended from his perch. "Provided you actually ask instead of staring at your garage door like you expect the stepladder to walk out by itself."

"Sure," she sarcastically agreed. "But I would've had to suffer your secrets and furtive looks too... Exactly like we're doing now."

"You could always scream for help if you really feel wary of my presence," Subaru pointed out while putting the burnt out bulb on the living room table for Ai to put away. "I'm sure your friends within the police will be more than happy to rush to your aid."

"And then what? So they can give you a very mild warning? Or worse... Give you pointers about how to warm up to me." As if you haven't tried warming up to me before, she relented from adding...

"You want them to rough me up in the interrogation room instead?"

"Maybe," she shrugged, "but even if they were actually the type to resort to physicality, I doubt they'd be able to wring anything out of you."

"You give me too much credit," Subaru said, turning away so he could wipe his fogged up lenses. "Either way, I've got nothing to hide."

"Is that why you're turning your back on me right now? Is that the reason you keep covering yourself up even in the heat of the summer?" Ai successively fired back. "Is that why you wouldn't let me into your territory so I can frisk you properly?"

Putting his glasses back on, Subaru walked over to where the switch was planted. "You're really trying to get me in trouble, aren't you, princess... You know I can't possibly remove my shirt in front of you. And I can't let you take it off either." A silent click later, and the living was once again basking under the artificial light.

"If I really wanted to get a pervert like you in trouble, I could think of far worse ways..." Despite her threat, Ai rolled her eyes to the side, towards the direction of the island kitchen. The last thing she wanted was for her imagination to start playing games with her too. "I won't even need to get anyone involved."

"Or you can just tell me to go away, save yourself the hassle," he deadpanned.

"Right," she retorted, unconvinced. "Would you actually do it though?"

"Like I said, you can count on me for anything."

Ai fell silent. As glib as he was whenever he humored her like so, she knew full well he really would disappear from her life again if she told him to. He was always awkward like that. Always wanting to do right by everyone at his own expense... Always feeling the need to bear the burden of everyone's ire... The darkness was already looming inside of him the first time they met, and from the looks of it, not even the sunniest person in the world was ultimately able to pierce through it.

But who was she to criticize him for it? It wasn't as if she didn't have her own moments of wanting to leave her friends behind for their sakes. Of just wanting to end it all so that nobody else had to suffer for her sins. Stupid as those decisions were in hindsight, she wouldn't even be here, in this silly impasse with him, if it wasn't for them.

Still looking away from Subaru, she heard his footsteps patting against the floor as he tried to abscond. Before he could crack the door open though, she finally spoke.

"...I suppose I could do that... But I doubt it'd be as fun."

As if abiding by the object he'd just fixed, Subaru's expression lit up. "So you're saying you're actually having fun playing with me?"

"I'll have more fun if you tell me everything there is to know about you," Ai quipped.

"You really want to hear about my uneventful high school and university days that much? I'm not sure if it'll make for an engrossing afternoon tale."

"Perhaps... But speaking of engrossing, Kudou-sensei's Macademy Award-winning script was, from what I'd heard."

"And here I thought you wanted me to bore you with stories about some fine ladies I've dated over the years."

Ai scoffed at the idea. "Sorry to disappoint, but now that it occurred to me, I think I'd rather watch that movie instead. I've been curious about it since I saw a clip of Kudou-sensei fawning over the guy while he was accepting the award."

Subaru simply grunted. "I should probably check it out sometime if you're that giddy about it."

"Hm? Ai raised an eyebrow. "So you live in the house of a world-renowned author rent-free, and you're telling me you have the gall not to keep up benefactor's career in the least?" she mocked.

"What can I say?" The engineering graduate, or so he claims himself to be, threw his hands outward in concession. "Kudou-sensei has a very extensive bibliography and filmography. I've yet to finish the entirety of 'Yuki's Casebook' as it is."

"Somehow I'm not surprised a pervert like you would be into that," she sneered. "For all I know, you keep rereading and rewatching it."

Rather than admit to anything, Subaru figured it was his cue to excuse himself from further scrutiny. Pretending to catch a whiff of something, he said, "I believe my Mapo tofu's calling on to me now. I rushed to your aid as soon as I saw you trying to get into your garage that I might've left the stove on."

"Well, good luck with that. It'd be bad if your negligence burned down millions' worth of manuscripts, antiquarian books, and signed copies," she replied, even though she was confident that a man like him would never slip up so badly.

"Don't hesitate calling me if you need anything else," he said in parting.

"I'll take that under advisement." But knowing the you right now, I doubt I actually have to call, she thought.

As the door behind Subaru slammed shut, Ai sighed, wondering how long the man intended to keep up with his little act in front of her... Not that she really hated the way things stand between them now. If this elaborate game of house is what's going to keep him around, so be it.

He'll come around. Eventually...


The End

written by tsukuy0mi47