Guess what guys? My first flame! And an awful one at that! (I guess it's a good thing I didn't run through that camp fire last night) Let's gawk at her!
amy-the-rat: Huh. That was an insult? Huh. Too bad it was weak. "This is stupid." Ouch. I'm so hurt I don't think I'm going to write this fic anymore…boo hoo. Guess what? You have changed my view completely on a few things. 1.) Harry Potter is such a noble book that it can't be poked fun at. I am one of the biggest Harry Potter fans around; I camp outside the bookstore the night before it comes out, I have Harry Potter merchandise, and last year for Halloween I was Harry Potter It's healthy for Harry to be made fun of, otherwise everybody would act like YOU. 2.) Somebody needs a nap. Somebody is too high and mighty to laugh at bodily functions and fat guys getting their eyes pecked out by owls.
My faithful readers: I'd like to thank you. Guys, my very first flame and it isn't even remotely painful. Feel sorry for me. xD
Chapter 4: DON'T SHOUT THE NAME VULGARMORE!
Don't ask how, but Hellgrill somehow came out of his drooly coma and managed to get Happy to Dragonalley. Cuz Happy's cool like that.
"So…I did what?"
"What?"
"Huh?" (Right here I was tempted to make Happy fall asleep, but I'll leave it at this)
"Well…do you know how yer parents (insert long unnecessary pause) kicked the bucket?
"With their foot?"
"No no no, I mean how they…how they died"
"Well der. They got killed in a car crash. Why?"
"Stupidass. What gave ye that idea?"
"That's what the Dimsleys said."
"With a name like that, why would you believe the Dimsleys?" Hellgrill pays no attention to the fact that he has a funny name, along with Happy Pooper. How convenient.
"Me."
"Well, your parents…they got killed by Vul—"
"Voldemort?"
"No, that's a stupid name."
"Then what?"
Hellgrill leaned over and whispered in Happy's ear, his breath smelling of alcohol…and…was that Jell-O?
"Vulgarmore."
"What the hell kind of a name is Vulgarmore?"
"Shh! Don't shout! DON'T SHOUT THE NAME VULGARMORE!" shouts Hellgrill, completely unaware of the fact that he was shouting the name of Vulgarmore.
"Ok, I won't say 'Vulgarmore' anymore. But what do you call him?"
"Vulgarmore should be referred to as We-Must-Think-Of-A-Longer-Hyphenated-Name-Because-He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-Is-Not-Long-Enough."
"Mkay I'll try to remember that." Says Happy, who has a very short attention span and is looking at butterflies. Or is that Ron? NO, that's in the movie.
So, basically he got all his crap in Dragonalley and managed to meet Draco and foreshadow a little bit.
And he got a super-annoying owl named Facetoupee (Get it? Head Wig, Face Toupee, LMAO! Not really…) that "playfully" nips his ear every now and then (does anybody else think this is overly sexual?)
And then he got his train ticket.
This one was…a few lines longer than the others! Hmm…I wonder why I don't have so many hits…do you think the title scares people away? Hum…
