The group of 6 finally found a Pokemon center in the next town over. As they entered, Nurse Joy stared at the strange Pokemon they were carrying.
"Hello there. What is wrong with you Pokemon?" she asked sweetly. This started to turn on Brock as hearts filled his eyes. Ling-Ling had to admit that she was rather hot and couldn't help but join in.
After staring for a few seconds, he rudely asked, "Can Hot Nurse get into a skimpier outfit and put bunny ears on hat? That way, Ling-Ling would be living in Playboy Mansion!" Of course, he wasn't speaking English when he said that, so it didn't offend anyone.
Ash placed him on the desk and stated, "He's really hungry but he won't accept Pokemon food. Maybe you can find out what he wants?" Nurse Joy nodded and asked, "Do you know what its name is?" Ash shook his head. "We also need to call Professor Oak and ask what this Pokemon is. We didn't really capture him. We just found him."
Ling-Ling growled and retorted, "I told you already, stupid animal-abuser, I am Ling-Ling!" May thought about this and said, "He sure seems to say "Ring-Ring" a lot. (He pronounces L's as R's and R's as L's) Maybe that's his name?" Max nodded his head and stated, "For once, my sister's actually right. We'll just call him Ring-Ring until we found out who he truly is."
Ling-Ling started to fume at the head as he retorted, "It's Ling-Ling, LING-LING!" Brock nodded and said, "He seems to be trying to tell us that his name is Ring-Ring, so his name must be Ring-Ring."
Ling-Ling slapped his forehead and thought, 'Humans can be SO stupid.' Anyway, a row of Chanceys came out of the back room and took Ling-Ling to where the food was. Ling-Ling grinned and thought, 'Now THAT'S more like it!'
Meanwhile, Ling-Ling's friends had somehow found the strange ball in the dump. Anyway, they were taking a break and fishing at a lake while Clara thought, 'We had been searching for 5 whole minutes! We deserved a break. Wait, where's the confession room? Why can I hear my thoughts? Let alone that fact, why do we all have sparkly eyes and soft, bright skin?'
Xandir was taking a dip when a huge sea monster appeared in front of him. He shrieked like a little girl as the sea monster, better known as Gyarados, rapped its tail around him and started to squeeze him.
Spanky noticed this and shouted, "Use your sword, you moron!" Xandir noticed that he still had his hero clothes on, so he withdrew his sword and planted it in the monster's tail. Sadly, this caused Gyarados to howl in pain thus causing a small tsunami. The small and insignificant title wave washed up our heroes and pulled them into the water.
Clara smiled as she thought, 'It seemed hopeless, but I knew exactly what to do!' Clara soon noticed that the sea monster was right in front of her with its mouth wide open as she dove underneath it and tickled its belly.
The others looked in astonishment as… the tickling did nothing and Clara was swallowed whole. Captain Hero immediately flew out of the evil water, punched the monster in the face and forced Clara out of its belly.
Meanwhile, Chanceys surrounded Ling-Ling as he was showered in people food. Ling-Ling munched happily on chicken legs as he asked, "Say, would any of you girls like to rock the house with Ling-Ling, tonight? I need a girlfriend after my last one was shot."
Flashback
Ling-Ling and a female trading card monster were busy making love when Bob the Cucumber entered the room and shot both of them in the skull. Ling-Ling was the only one to come back to life.
End Flashback
Sadly, the Chanceys had no idea what he was saying. Of course, had they understood his language, they would have beaten him up silly. Ling-Ling hung his head low as he thought, 'It's hard when you're the only one who can understand a thing you say.'
Meanwhile, Ash was in the other room on the screen-phone. "Hi, Professor!" he greeted. Professor Oak smiled and asked, "What is it you wish to know, Ash?" Ling-Ling walked out of the other room with a look of shame on his face as Brock forced him up off the ground and forced him in front of the screen-phone.
"Can you tell us what this is?" asked Ash. "We believe that his name is Ring-Ring, but we're not too sure." Ling-Ling's eyes became aghast as he hollered, "WHAT IS THIS FORM OF WITCHCRAFT? COMMUNICATORS SUCH AS THESE AREN'T SUPPOSED TO EXIST FOR ANOTHER 200 YEARS!"
Oak looked Ling-Ling over and said, "I've never seen this Pokemon before. His build is very much like that of Pikachu's, but it's different. I'll have to look it up." The others just stared as four strange-looking beings entered. The five people (Excluding Ling-Ling) stared at these four strangers.
One of the men looked rather effeminate and wore hero's clothing. (Along with a Speedo) The other looked like a super hero wannabe. The girl was dressed up like a princess while the last stranger was a pig with a red shirt and blue slacks.
The four walked up to the counter as Spanky asked, "Hey, gorgeous, do you know where I can find a bathroom? Better yet, do you know why you look so hot?" Nurse Joy stared and blinked at the small pig as May blurted out, "DID THAT PIG JUST TALK?"
The four looked over at the girl who just asked that to see that the boy with the red hat next to her was holding a small furry creature with an exclamation mark for a tail. Xandir jumped up and down and shouted happily, "We found Ling-Ling!"
Ling-Ling perked up and ran over to the four and happily shouted, "Ling-Ling's nakama! Honorable Pig Demon, Bilbo Gay-gins, Princess Stereotype and Captain Airhead! Wait, where's Chocolate Animal Woman?" Xandir giggled as he stated, "Foxy didn't come because we wanted to do this one our own." Ash, May, Max and Brock just stared as Ash whispered, "I could swear I just heard Ring-Ring speak some English. Wait, who are these guys and why does it seem like they can understand Ring-Ring?"
May didn't care. She was still staring at the talking pig. Soon, that talking pig noticed May, ran up to her and let out a wide grin. He winked and stated, "Hey there, baby, you ever do a sausage before?" Clara took out a tranquilizer dart and planted it in the pig's back as she said, "Sorry, he always does that."
Ash shook his head and asked, "Who are you?" Xandir stepped forward and heroically said, "I am Xandir, and I am on a never-ending quest to save my… uh…" Captain Hero placed a hand on his shoulder and stated, "Don't be afraid. It's okay to admit to them that… YOU'RE GAY! Ha-ha-ha-ha! How do you like THEM apples, huh? Ha-ha-ha! This guy's on a never-ending quest to save his boyfriend!"
Brock stared at this retarded display and asked, "Can you just tell us why we should trust you with our new friend, Ring-Ring?" Captain Hero pondered this for a moment and, after 30 seconds, finally figured out who Ring-Ring was. Clara pushed him out of the way and answered, "We're his friends, and his name is 'Ling-Ling'. We came searching for him!"
Ash smiled and stated, "Oh, so you're his trainers?" The four stared at one-another and asked, "Trainers?" Max glared that them and asked, "How can you not be his trainers? He's YOUR pokemon, right?" The four stared at one-another again and asked, "Pokemon?"
After about an hour, everything had finally been cleared up. The four had explained their predicament and Ash along with his friends understood. Ash agreed to help them return home. "No I didn't." said Ash. But in the end, he did. "No, I'm telling you, I didn't." he remarked. In the end, he agreed that it was right to just help these people and ask questions later because helping people is the right thing to do!
That's it for chapter 2. Sorry for the lack of action, but anyway:
What will become of our heroes? Will Ling-Ling and his friends ever return home? Find out next time!
