A/N: I'm just gonna get write into the story, 'kay?

Disclaimer: Same again. Don't own it!

Special Mention: A very special mention goes to Nutz Nina. Her great reviewing skills made her reviewer number 100!

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Previously

All I was aware of was Kel, who was doubled over in the saddle.

I rode over to her just as she fell forward into my arms. What should I do? I couldn't handle something like this!

Neal! The voice in my head this time sounded like Kel. You need to get her to your father! She'll die otherwise!

Hurriedly, I pulled her on to my saddle. I could feel her blood soaking through my shirt.

I turned Magewhisper in the direction of the palace and she broke into a gallop of her own accord. I trusted the others to fetch Hoshi and follow me.

As we flew back down the path, I noted that my hands were slippery with Kel's warm, red blood.

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My Greatest Fear

Chapter 7: Waiting

The waiting room outside the palace infirmary was packed. Not only did it contain those who had been on our disastrous ride, but also Kel's family, who had arrived for her Ordeal in a couple of days, Daine and her (finally) betrothed, Numair Salmalin, who had both shown up after she'd tended to our wounded horses, Lord Raoul and Buri and most of the Third Company of the King's Own.

On arriving back at the palace, I taken Kel into my arms and run with her all the way to my father's office. He'd taken her inside and locked everyone out, except for Alanna who arrived soon after everyone else caught up. The healers had been in there for going on two hours.

I felt so helpless. I wanted to do something, I had the healing Gift after all, but what could I do? I'd probably take one look at her and panic. Never in all my life had I felt so useless. It wasn't helped by Cleon glaring at me from across the room.

Unable to sit any longer, I stood and began pacing the room. Owen followed my movements with his eyes and Roald played a ball of blue fire between his fingers. No one had said a word in over an hour.

With every step I took, my feelings of guilt doubled. There was no question that I was to blame for all this. To make matters worse, my mind had divided and a battle was raging inside my head. Neither side showed any side of advantage.

This is your fault. I hope you realise that!

No, it isn't! I had no way of knowing the Stormwings were in the area.

Would it have been so hard to check with Daine? If you had, none of this would be happening.

I had no reason to check. There's never been any major problem like this before.

Maybe, but that doesn't change the fact that Kel is dying!

Not necessarily. She's in good hands, she'll be alright.

You hope. You saw how much blood she lost. You're soaked in it!

It was true. My previously white shirt was now stiff and the colour of dried blood. My hands were stained red, just as they had been two nights ago.

Sometime during my mental argument with myself, I'd come to a halt. I now found myself staring at my hands, rough and red. My fingers shook and I clasped my hands together but the blood had found its way between my fingers and to the backs of my hands.

Before I could notice anything more, a pair of soft, white hands came into view and covered my own. Raising my head, I looked into the eyes of Ilane of Mindelan.

In her low, musical voice she said, "Don't trouble yourself. Kel is strong. I know she'll be alright."

"But-"

"Nealan… Neal, if you hadn't acted as quickly as you did, my daughter would have died in that forest. She owes you her life and I am in your debt. Thank you." She leant forward and gently kissed my cheeks.

When she'd returned to her seat, I turned and made my way to the window, feeling a little better about the whole ordeal.

I stood there, looking out over the training yards that we'd spent so much time in. I could recall so many things Kel had done or said on those yards. Try as I might though, I could never remember what I had said or done. It was always Kel, talking, smiling, laughing, running rings around the rest of us. These thoughts brought a smile to my face and I laughed. It sounded odd in the expectant silence but not wrong.

This was the last straw for Cleon though, who sprang to his feet and said loudly, "What's wrong with you? You stand there laughing while on the other side of that door, Kel could be dying. I don't care what anyone says, it's entirely your fault. If she dies, I'm holding you responsible. If she dies Neal, I swear, I'll kill you myself and then I'll go out and hand your body over to the first flock of Stormwings I find!"

I heard Kel's sister gasp in outrage but I refused to acknowledge what Cleon had said.

"Well?" Cleon asked, still angry, "are you going to just stand there or are you going you going to say something?"

Again, I remained silent.

Cleon stalked up to me and grabbed my arm, pulling me roughly around to face him. I wrenched my arm out of his grasp.

"Neal, answer me!"

In a quiet tone that betrayed my anger, I said, "I refuse to speak to a man who treats conversations as shouting matches. Does that answer your question? Let me also point out that, should my father and Alanna loose their concentration due to your yelling, and Kel does die, the tragedy will no longer be on my shoulders but instead, on yours."

"Now now," said Lord Raoul, hands outstretched in a placating way, "let's not get carried away. Everyone here knows Kel's made of strong stuff. She won't go dying on us anytime soon."

"Right," Dom put in. "Besides, she needs to whack Sir Meathead one more time."

"And remind him to eat his vegetables!" Faleron laughed.

"I doubt she'd leave Peachblossom either," Daine said quietly, breaking off her mental conversation with one of Kel's sparrows.

"Good," Merric said. "Now, if we're all in agreement that Kel won't die, what say you all take your seats? You're standing and pacing is becoming nerve-wrecking."

I was just sitting down again when the Infirmary door opened quietly and every occupant of the waiting room stood to hear what Alanna had to say.

"Well, she's doing just fine, although things were a bit touch and go for a while. Duke Baird and I have done as much as possible; it's up to Kel to do the rest."

"What do you mean, you've done as much as possible?" Kel's father, Piers, asked.

Alanna turned to me and I knew she would be testing me. "Neal?"

I felt everyone's eyes on me as I explained the situation. "With a wound as extensive as Kel's, it's impossible for a Healer, even one as powerful as Lady Alanna or my father, to fix every problem. They have healed as much as they were able but now Kel's body must take care of what they didn't."

Alanna nodded. "Correct. But Neal, why didn't you begin her healing on the road and send a friend to fetch your father and me? It would have been better for her."

I hung my head, feeling as if I'd failed somehow. "I know. I saw all the blood and didn't know what to do. She's my best friend Alanna, surely you understand that?"

She smiled grimly. "Indeed I do, though next time, try and at least stem the flow of blood."

I nodded. "Is she conscious?"

"Just barely. She's hanging on so she can see her family."

On cue, the whole Mindelan clan came forward and filed into the Infirmary past Alanna. The Lioness followed the family inside and shut the door.

"Well," said Lord Raoul, "now that we know everything's alright, we'd best be going. Come on boys, we can come back tomorrow."

Raoul left with Buri, Third Company, Numair and Daine in tow. The only people who remained with me, were my friends.

"Come on Neal, we'd better get going," Merric said, beckoning to me.

I looked up in surprise; at some point I had resumed my seat. "What do you mean?"

"She'll be fine Neal and we need to eat."

"And don't forget," Seaver said quietly, "I've got my Ordeal tonight."

I was shocked; I'd completely forgotten. What to do?

Seaver saw the conflict written on my face. "It's fine Neal, I know you want to stay with Kel. Don't worry about it."

"No, I'll come. I'd feel bad leaving you to the Chamber."

"Maybe, but you'd feel worse leaving Kel, as bad as she is. Don't worry about it, really."

"Are you sure?"

Seaver nodded. "Positive."

I took my friends hand and clapped him on the back. "Thank you. Don't worry, you'll be fine. You'll get through it."

His smile progressed from shaky to confidant at hearing my words and my conscience was relieved a little. I sat again and watched my friends leave, until, finally, I was alone with nothing but my thoughts.

Closing my eyes, I leaned my head back until it rested against the wall behind me.

Thank the Gods, I thought, She could have died, but she didn't. She's alright.

I didn't notice my father leave the Infirmary and sit beside me until he said my name quietly.

I cracked one eye open and saw the weariness in his face.

"Neal? Are you alright?"

Sighing, I straightened up in my chair and opened both eyes. "I am now. Of course, I can never remember being so scared in my life, but, you know, other than that…"

Father laid a hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently. "I've never felt so much pressure to succeed. While I was in there, two thoughts ran through my head. One was that, if she died, you would never forgive me. The other was that you'd never forgive yourself. I knew that would be worse."

"Why?"

"Because, you would have withered away. She's everything to you. A blind man could see it. I have no doubt that you would die without her, Neal. Besides, you love her, you would have been so lost."

"She's the best friend anyone could ever have."

My father shook his head. "Neal, I'm not stupid. I know you're in love with her."

I bit my lip. "Is it that obvious?"

He thought for a moment. "Only to people who expected it."

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.

"Well, I've always known it would happen and your friends probably had their suspicions. Alanna mentioned to me once during your squiredom that you were totally besotted with her. We can see it because we always knew it was there."

I sighed and leaned forward to rest my elbows on my knees. "Do you think Kel knows?"

Father was silent for a long while. "Maybe, maybe not. It's hard to say."

"So what do I do?"

"My advice to you would be to just come right and say it. You can't beat the straight approach."

"And if she doesn't feel the same?"

Father shrugged. "No one ever said love was easy."

I stared down at my hands, rubbing them together absently. It had taken almost losing her to realise just how much she meant to me. Now that I knew she would recover, could I risk losing her again if my feelings weren't mutual?

"Here, you probably want to wash some of that blood off."

I turned to my father who had produced a basin of steaming water and a washcloth from somewhere. He dipped the cloth into the water and, bringing it out again, wrung the excess out. He held out the still slightly dripping piece of material and I took it, slowly wiping it over my red hands. When he took it back and put it back in the basin, the water was instantly dyed a soft red. Still, the waters new colour looked anything but innocent.

My father placed the basin on the floor beside him and we sat in a comfortable silence. We had always had a good relationship.

After a while, the Infirmary door opened again and Kel's family came back into the waiting room. The men looked grim and the women pale. My father and I stood up to meet them.

"Thank you for everything you've done, Your Grace," Kel's father said, shaking my father's hand.

"Quite alright. Your daughter and my sone are so very close, Kel has come to mean almost as much to me as she does to him. I'll never be able to fully repay her for knocking Neal off his high-horse either."

I groaned and everyone present laughed.

"We'll be back to see her again in the morning," Ilane said.

Father nodded and picked up the basin when the family had left. "Well, goodnight Neal."

"Father," I said hurriedly, as he went to close the door in my face, "please, may I stay with her?"

"All night?"

I hesitated then nodded and my father took his time thinking it over.

"Well, I suppose that would be alright. Just, call me should anything happen and don't disturb her."

I nodded and stepped forward as my father held open the door.

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A/N: Well, that's it for now. This was actually supposed to be a lot longer but I thought I'd cut it in half to make two different chapters. Things are better that way.

So, I understand that Cleon is a little more evil than I'd originally planned but I can't help it if the story writes itself.

Reviews please!