Kazuma woke up this morning more energetic than you would expect from somebody who got stabbed through the stomach.
Recent experience with getting impaled by sharp objects had shown him that a small ghost pain remained for a few days, even if the wound regenerated as fast as a few minutes after receiving it from an opponent.
The wounds caused from Darkness and Rebellion took the longest so far, visible injuries finally fading away after the two hour mark. This state of continuous healing had made the walk through the dungeon for the lich Keele a weird experience for him.
Aqua had been eerily silent and withdrawn on the way and during the ritual, only saying the bare minimum and not looking Kazuma in the eyes once. The purification of the undead turned out to be just a formality in the end with him desperately wanting to pass on to meet his wife.
Megumin hadn't let go of Kazuma since becoming a shield against Vanir. She had walked with at least a hand on his sleeves until they were back in town, which took them several hours and way into the night.
Darkness had been on edge and jumped at every shadow during their travels, playing bodyguard for the whole group and not letting anyone else join the fighting against several dungeon monsters. Every attempt to help, especially from Kazuma, was politely denied or ignored by the determined crusader.
Vanir didn't stick around to everyone's great relief. The archdemon had a quick talk with the lich about the facility and decided to build his own dungeon from the ground up. He also decided to use the appearance of Devil-chan to fake his death. With what she would do to the Devil King, if not killing him outright, nobody should doubt the claim of his demise by her hand. For now, he would set up shop with Wiz to gather the necessary funds.
The eventful day ended pretty boring by them arriving back at the mansion and going to bed early.
Which brought us to the current situation of him groggily staring at his cute red headed savior.
"Rise and shine, my precious little troublemaker." Devil Chan lied beside Kazuma in red pyjamas with a horned hood, her head propped up on one elbow in similar fashion how a certain goddess decided to invade his privacy a few days ago.
This time he welcomed the intruder with open arms.
Literally.
"Good morning and thank you for taking care of my problem," he said with a raspy voice after waking up, hugging the little devil like a cherished stuffed toy.
If Devil-chan minded to be treated with affection by Kazuma, she didn't show it in any way. The little devil wasn't flustered either, looking at the young man in the same manner somebody would look at a cute dog. "You have nothing to be thankful about. The opportunity to vent my frustration on this so called Devil King is repayment enough."
"Did you beat him?"
"Technically no," she sighed and rolled on her back to stare at the ceiling with a frown. "The coward was hiding behind a barrier and I had to make do with his minions outside the castle."
There was a nanosecond of cold shivers running down Kazuma's spine. Devil-chan wasn't showing it, but his instincts told him to never ever get on the bad side of the little devil. Not that he imagined ever doing anything against his greatest benefactor.
"How much of his army is left?"
Devil-chan smiled and pinched his cheek. "Survivors… pfft…. You are so adorable."
It sounded like the Devil King won't be bothering anyone anytime soon. The loss of his troops should put a significant damper on any plans against humanity as a whole. Maybe this latest turn of events finally symbolized the dawn of peace and quiet for him.
"Don't think this is over NEET…"
Hot breath against the back of his neck and sleeptalking against his left ear informed Kazuma about the fact that Aqua had once again joined him in bed after he went to sleep. Spending the nights together in the stables had been a necessity during their starting days in this world, yet for some reason she kept doing it even if her own room was perfectly equipped for a night's rest. He carefully stretched with a yawn and his foot hit something warm.
"Mmmmh.. explosion…"
This was a new development. Curled up in a ball like a cat, Megumin occupied the lower part of Kazuma's bed. Devil-chan pointed behind Aqua and Kazuma followed her direction with his eyes. Darkness sat in a chair by the bed, sword in her lap and head on her chest, obviously asleep as well.
"They all seem worried about you."
"I can't imagine why," he said and tried to inch away from Aqua. The goddess instantly followed from the lack of warmth and wrapped her arms around his barrel from behind. If she ever figured out to remain a tenth as cute in her waking state as she was sleeping, Kazuma wouldn't know how to control himself. "Is this a woman's intuition or did you use your powers to come to that conclusion?"
"A little bit of both. It's not that hard to figure out what drives their actions. The goddess can't heal you anymore and in extension resurrection is most likely also off the table."
For a moment he thought the sound of Aqua's snores changed. "So, Devil-chan is the only one who can bring me back when I kick the bucket?"
Two petite and incredibly strong hands with red fingernails grabbed his cheeks and turned his head to look Devil-chan in the eyes, her expression turning serious and intense in an instant. "There won't be a second chance, kiddo. A devil dying in his real body is the end. Full stop."
Aqua's grip around him became tighter and Kazuma glanced over his shoulder at her sleeping face in confusion while Devil-chan had a knowing smile. "So don't do anything stupid. I've also grown quite fond of you."
They talked about mostly trivial stuff like their taste in movies and her newfound love for human entertainment since she got to take a peek in his head. For the first time in his life, Kazuma felt like somebody understood him and those feelings made him ask how long Devil-chan could stay in this world.
He didn't like the answer.
"I have to be on my way, junior. It's better not to push my luck and scare the hardasses of heaven into action."
This whole situation was unfair in his opinion. Heaven didn't have any objection with letting a goddess run around in this world and they can't let a devil slide for more than one day? "What about your boss? Can't he negotiate something to let you stay longer?"
"I am my own boss."
The weight of her words made his tongue go numb to the point only a single question escaped before his voice gave out.
"What is your name?"
Devil-chan looked at him in a way that made the half-devil feel like a stumbling newborn kitten, something amusing and deeply flawed she loved nonetheless. Despite the appearance of a cute little girl, he noticed the aeons of time and experience behind her eyes.
She brushed a strand of hair out of his face with the gentleness of a mother. "Too many to count. I'm partial to Devil-chan though, it has a nice ring to it."
Talk about friends in high places.
KONOSUBA!
"Those eggs are really good."
The tension in the kitchen was thick enough to choke on. After a lot of begging and pleading, Kazuma had convinced Devil-chan to stay for a quick breakfast and enjoy human cuisine. Needless to say, three-fourth of the inhabitants weren't happy about this decision.
"Thank you!" Kazuma stood on the stove in front of several pans, preparing multiple breakfast foods at once, while three girls sat there and stared at the red-headed newcomer with disdain. "The cooking skill really comes in handy. I really don't know why not more adventurers learn it!"
Megumin poked her perfectly cooked omelette with much less enthusiasm. "Maybe because not everyone has massive amounts of points to spare for convenience skills."
The large group of succubi were still around them as always, but they kept a greater distance than usual and seemed really on edge from the new addition to the table. Devil-chan didn't mind them, sometimes glancing casually at a succubus getting too close and getting a frightened screech in return.
"You there," she finally said to the closest one. "Would you be a dear and refill my glass with this delectable orange juice?"
The succubus turned out to be the flatchested one Kazuma had dubbed Lolibus. She poured from the large pitcher with shaking hands, overfilling the glass and splashing the thick juice all over the table. Several droplets landed on the face of Devil-chan and the lust demon began to hyperventilate from the smile she got from the devil.
Kazuma unknowingly dispelled the tension by serving new plates of freshly cooked food and wiping the liquid tenderly off her cheek with a napkin. The redhead thanked Kazuma with a genuine smile and a squeeze of his hand.
Megumin hated how nice and trusting Kazuma was with this devil. Although she realized he was in her debt for bringing him back and giving him powers, the crimson demon couldn't stand seeing their usually sarcastic and snarky party leader act like a servant for her.
Darkness ate her plate of food while standing, keeping close to Kazuma at all times. She had found purpose in her new role as bodyguard, still feeling incredibly guilty for being responsible for the whole trouble with Vanir. The crusader kept apologizing, even offering to give back her sword because she didn't deserve it, which their party leader vehemently declined and he wanted Darkness to stop being stupid about this to no avail.
As expected, the most antagonistic towards Devil-chan was Aqua. She kept trying to aggravate Devil-chan in small ways, because even the goddess knew a direct confrontation wouldn't go in her favor. It started with childish pranks like loosening the lids on the spice shakers to make the devil overload with salt and pepper, and ended with going for all the foods she was interested in and taking it away from her at the last moment.
Devil-chan just smiled at the pettiness of a goddess with a man-high plate of bacon, eggs and pancakes.
Even though he tried to stall for as long as possible, Devil-chan eventually had to say farewell. They gathered at the mansion entrance and Kazuma went for his sword with great hesitation.
"Come on boy, Mommy has to go to work..."
A deep sigh came from his lips and he opened a portal with two unenthusiastic slashes. "Are you going to visit again?"
Devil-chan was amused by his clinginess and signaled him to bend down for a ruffle through his hair. She decided to part ways with a casual comment just at the moment Kazuma's portal closed behind her.
"Never say never. Stay safe and remember If you ever have enough of this world, I gladly show you the ropes in hell."
Silence reigned after her departure with the exception of the sound of Kazuma gripping tightly around the hilt of his sheathed sword. Deeply conflicted, he stared at the spot Devil-chan had vanished and two of his companions could see how tempted he was by the offer.
Aqua was the only one not realizing the brittle state of their party. "Glad the stanky devil bitch is finally gone!"
The slightest twitch ran through his fingers on the sword.
There was a way out of this world. He didn't need to stay.
"Kazuma?" Megumin approached Kazuma from behind, who hadn't moved a step or said a word since the closure of the portal. Her scared expression relieved the tension from his body and a glance at the worried Darkness caused a deep intake of air and a controlled exhale.
"I'm going to take a bath," he responded with a hoarse voice and wiped his eyes, before turning around and passing the three to get inside the house.
Aqua stopped him with her hand on his shoulder. "Kazuma, you like baths right? Even when we were dirt poor and starving, you always put away money for daily visits to the bathhouse."
Kazuma raised an eyebrow. "Sure I do. What's your point?"
She smiled as if he had just admitted something groundbreaking. "How about a little vacation in Alcanrentia, the city of hot springs and baths? Quests are still scarce and we don't need money after cashing in the reward for the Destroyer and Vanir."
"I'm not sure…"
"Did I mention they are mixed baths?" Aqua said with her smile turning catlike under the alarmed faces of Megumin and Darkness. "Is pervy Kazuma not interested in bathing together with his beautiful party members?"
The archwizard and crusader weren't long enough in their party to realize this was the usual song and dance between Kazuma and her. She never would entertain the thought of bathing together with the HikiNEET, although she was bit miffed that he never even tried. The goddess was hoping to embarrass Kazuma enough to force him out of his bad mood, but the blank expression she got in return stumped her.
"Of course I am interested, who wouldn't? You are all hot, yes even you Megumin." Kazuma managed to say these incredible words as dry as a desert as he stared his companions down. "Call me a lolicon and pervert all you want, I don't care anymore."
A knock at the door interrupted the awkward standoff. Megumin was the person closest to the door and opened it to see who was interrupting them at this crucial moment. Her gasp drew the attention of the rest towards the visitor, who brought an evil smile to Kazuma's face.
"Hello, Yunyun. What can I do for you?"
"Kazuma, I'm here to discuss my training!"
"Perfect timing, follow me to the bath and let me see what we are working with."
"Eh?!"
