Look who's updating againnnn! And...I don't know, maybe this is filler? But it made me happy to write, and it's not particularly long regardless. (Do I apologise for that or not? My chapters were called "punishingly long" - not necessarily in a bad way! - and this is really quite short, by my standards at least.) It was just a necessary cut for what I have planned next! And, bonus, I'm already writing the next chapter! Health update, for anyone who cares - thus far my meds are working (on one issue), and I have another that I'll be trying soon. If that doesn't work, I'm going to the more nuclear option, so to speak. But! I have plans in place for my health and that alone makes me feel better. So, if everything goes according to plan, I should be able to keep updating without problems, since the only issue is my arm, and that's a long-term process to figure that whole thing out. I've been living with that for several years now anyway! So, with better spirits than usual, I offer you this chapter and hope it brings you some joy to read, like it did for me. Thank you to the reviewers and commenters for the last pair of chapters! Your words mean so, so much to me. Now - on to some fluff. Because who doesn't like fluff?


"Easy, be careful, it's pretty slick today," Lissa murmured, keeping her arm tight around Ed's waist.

He wrinkled his nose at her. "C'mon, don't baby me. I'm way better already—and besides, I haven't been outside in days, at least let me enjoy it."

"You can enjoy it all you want, but if you fall and reinjure yourself, you'll be stuck inside again," she pointed out. "The condition was you stay beside me the whole time, right? Did you think I was kidding or something?"

"No, but…" Ed gestured out at the city around them—snow had fallen through most of the previous day, covering North City in a blanket of brand-new white fluff. "Look at it!"

She giggled, unable to find the childish excitement anything but cute. "Yes, silly. It snowed yesterday. But you can't go running around in it! You'll pull your stitches or worse, and then I'll get in trouble for not taking care of you!"

"But-"

"Besides," she cut in, tugging him in against her and kissing his cheek to shush him, "we have important errands to run, right? Like getting food."

Ed actually considered that. "Mmh…right, food. I missed food."

He had every right to—he'd been on a very light diet the past couple days, focused on proteins and bland profiles to get his strength back up without overtaxing his stomach, but today the doctor had given his okay not just for Ed to leave the office but to eat real food too, more than broth and vegetables and plain meat. That was her bargaining chip, really.

"Yes, food, dummy," she laughed, tugging him forward on the snowy street. "Come on, I know exactly where you'll wanna go."

With Ed going willingly now, Lissa led him down to North City's market district, a place she'd frequented plenty in the six days they'd been there. She kept her arm tight around him as they walked, feeling him rest plenty of weight on her, keeping his balance with his arm draped around her shoulders. He was still a little weak, though he was healing nicely so far, but walking was…still hard. It strained the wound on his abdomen with every step, Lissa knew that, but he was determined.

And, well… He'd only get better now by pushing through.

The past couple days had been a bit strange—awkward at first, while they sort of danced around each other and tried not to get upset, culminating in a four AM heart-to-heart they both fell asleep during. Still, it had worked. After that, things felt pretty normal. And with Ed still healing…this was the most peace they'd had in, well, ever.

"It's through here," Lissa told Ed, guiding him down a side street that was, as usual, a bit less clogged than the rest of the district. That was part of why she liked it—crowds still weren't her favorite thing in the world, after all—but also…it held her favorite shop in all of North City.

Ed looked up at the little handpainted sign in surprise. "A bakery? Weren't there, like, a dozen of those out on the main street?"

She grinned and pulled him in through the door. "Trust me. This one's special, I promise." As soon as they stepped in, they were greeted by the familiar smells of freshly-baked bread, icing sugar, pastries, cinnamon… Lissa grinned as Ed's eyes widened. She could practically see him salivating. Since it was only a few feet away, she let him hobble over to the display case on his own, pressing his fingertips to the glass and peering inside eagerly.

"Oh!" The old woman who ran the bakery stepped out from the back room and beamed as she saw Lissa, friendly as always. "Miss Eden, how lovely to see you! And I see you've brought a friend."

Eden. The pseudonym she'd used, stolen from Ed and the Rockbells' dog Den. Stupid, but it made her feel more at ease picking a name that had a meaning behind it, rather than just something random. And it kept her focused when she was out, too. Every time she gave her name or someone used it on her, it just drove home why she was out there in North City, displaced, pretending to be someone else.

Lissa raised a hand in greeting. "Hi, Ms. Henrietta. It's good to see you too." She ruffled Ed's hair, making him wrinkle his nose at her before returning to his staring contest with the pastries. "This is Liam, he's my…"

"Boyfriend," Ed piped up, finally tearing his gaze from the pastries and grinning as he took Lissa's hand.

Yeah, that. I just didn't know if you wanted me to say it, dummy.

It just made Ms. Henrietta smile wider, delighted. "Well, you two take a look around, let me know if you see anything you like. If it's sliced, you can have a sample, too. What's your budget for today, Miss Eden?"

That was one of Lissa's favorite things here. The old woman had sniffed out that Lissa was in a tight situation her very first visit, and quickly set up an arrangement—she'd say whatever she could spend that day outright, at the start, and get to fill a box of whatever size Ms. Henrietta gave her. Then she'd just pay what they agreed at the beginning. Lissa had tried to argue it, but she'd lost that battle pretty quickly.

"About two-thousand cens," Lissa told her, smiling in response to Ed's curious look.

"You got it." Ms. Henrietta shuffled around behind the counter, and produced a mid-sized box—maybe a bit too generous, but Lissa guessed the old woman was giddy about having Lissa and her boyfriend in the shop. Fine. More for Ed, then.

Catching on, Ed began asking questions immediately—what was in this pastry, that cake, these dumplings… He purposefully picked a few things just for Lissa, accustomed to her tastes by now, and she snagged a couple chocolate chip cookies for nostalgia's sake. Ed finished off the box with a cinnamon roll, one of his absolute favorites, and they left with their box tucked under Lissa's arm safely, and Ms. Henrietta giggling at them the whole way.

"She seems nice," Ed observed, through the thumbprint cookie he was chewing.

Lissa nodded absently—she was busy resisting the urge to wipe a bit of jam off the corner of his mouth. "She's been really sweet to me. She figured out that I was…a bit tight on cash right at the beginning, so that's what the whole budget thing was about."

He finished that cookie and started on another one, which he'd kept out of the box purposefully just for this. "Ugh, man, I didn't realize how much I missed real food."

"You were practically drooling earlier," Lissa pointed out wryly.

"Yeah, but it's different now that my taste buds actually remember it." He sucked a little icing sugar off his finger and grinned at her. "I don't suppose you have any special places picked for dinner, do you?"

Lissa just laughed and pulled him to the edge of the pavement, up against a building. "C'mere, dummy… How are you this messy, huh?" she teased. While Ed was still confused, she swiped her thumb across the corner of his mouth, making him blush at the gesture. "Yes, to answer your question, I know the perfect place. They have a fireplace outside, too, so we don't even have to be trapped indoors. Since I know someone is a little stir crazy right now."

He shook off the embarrassment and pulled her into him, brushing the sweetest kiss across her lips. "You are way too good to me. You know that?"

She gave him a wry look. "Oh, so I should treat you worse, is that it?"

Ed wrinkled his nose and kissed her again, harder, enough to make her stomach twist into knots. His left hand slipped up to the nape of her neck, fingers sliding through hair she'd left loose that day. "Don't even joke," he told her as he pulled back, smirking.

Trying to regain a little composure, Lissa tugged his arm over her shoulders and started off down the street again. "Come on, you. I wanna get you off your feet, if you strain yourself too much today you'll just get stuck inside tomorrow." It was futile, though—the devious smirk on his face told her that Ed was very much so aware of the effect he'd had on her.

But for the moment, she just…couldn't bring herself to care.

They ate dinner at the café Lissa had picked out, and even though it was a bit chilly outside, she didn't mind sitting there. Ed's eyes were alight the whole time, his delight infectious, and as long as they stayed close to the fire—and each other—the cold was manageable. It was amazing how much more she liked North City when he was with her…how much more she just enjoyed existing because of him. Like the whole world was constantly lit with the soft glow of dawn.

By the time they returned to the clinic, Ed's movement was labored and he was breathing a bit too hard, so Lissa took it upon herself to run hot water in the tub while the doctor checked out his wound. Ed would whine about her babying him, but she'd rather look after him.

Sure enough, when the doctor left and Ed hobbled his way into the adjoining bathroom to find her, he wrinkled his nose immediately. "You don't have to do stuff like that for me," he mumbled.

She just smiled at him fondly. "I don't have to, but I did it anyway." She pecked him on the lips as she headed out, dropping a couple towels in his arms on the way. "I'll be outside, okay? Just yell if you need anything."

Ed's irritation softened. "Got it. Thanks, Liss."

That was enough for her to be comfortable, at least for a little while, so she left him in there to handle himself and instead busied herself cleaning up the room a bit. It got messy, with the two of them coexisting in such a small space and trying not to let anything bleed out into the main part of the clinic—this was sort of a long-term care room with an ensuite, which was perfect for their needs…but they just weren't used to being in one place for so long. Besides, Lissa was realizing that between the three of them, Al was actually the neatest one. She still kind of struggled with an old rebellious messy streak, her old method of getting back at the head of her facility in Central.

Alphonse… Just thinking of him made Lissa's anxiety go haywire. She missed Al, missed his constant present and sweet nature, not to mention she was worried sick about him… Stuck here in North City, they'd had no news, no idea what had happened to him and Winry, and their group. To Ed, she always blustered about it, swearing up and down they had to be fine… But privately, she was so damn worried.

Once she'd cleaned up as much as she could, tucking everything into a backpack she'd transmuted a few days ago, Lissa grabbed out a couple items she'd need later and sank onto the bed, lying flat with her legs dangling off the edge at her knees. The general timeline of Ed's healing implied he'd be ready in three or four days, at least healed enough to move on from the city. That meant three to four days until she had to come clean about her plan, the growing certainty that Central was where they needed to go. She didn't think Ed would like it much, not at first, and getting past that initial stubborn layer could be stupidly difficult.

She pressed her hands over her face for a moment, already preparing herself. Ed would think of their little brother first—if Al would go to Central or not. And he would, eventually…but the problem was, would he already be heading there? Would he know that Ed and Lissa had gone missing, or would he think they were still out looking for him?

Too many damned variables. I hate this. We need a better system for if we get separated.

But the truth was…they'd never really considered it as a genuine possibility. The only times they'd been separated, in nearly four years, were for short overnights or more commonly just a few hours at a time. Being apart just…didn't happen. They were a constant team of three.

That was naïve of us, wasn't it? To think we'd never get split up.

The bathroom door creaked as it swung open, and Lissa got up immediately to help Ed sit down. "How's your stomach?" she asked him, since he'd taken to covering his upper body with a second towel—like he didn't want her to see the scarring.

Ed shrugged faintly. He was exhausted, she could tell. "It's okay. Better than it was, at least."

"Can I-"

He shook his head immediately. "It's…bad. Just…lemme find a shirt or something…"

Lissa frowned at him, wanting to argue it—but she didn't want to upset him, and honestly, she didn't know how he'd react. So she grabbed the shirt she'd left on the bed and passed it to him, waiting, trying to gauge his mood.

Ed awkwardly began to put the shirt on, trying to work out how to get it over his arms without letting the towel fall—and watching him so desperate, so afraid of her reaction… That was enough for her to risk whatever his reaction might be. "Here, stop that," she told him, gently catching his hands and pulling the garment back down into his lap. "Why are you so afraid of me seeing it, Ed? It's not like I didn't see it before, while you were unconscious."

"Yeah, but…" He shifted uncomfortably. "It's different now. It looks…" Ed furrowed his brow. "I don't want to make you remember that, is all. I know it's a bad memory, seeing me that way."

She sat down beside him on the edge of the bed, and reached out slowly, aware his gaze was fixed on her hand, until she could dip her fingers beneath that upper towel, just tugging lightly. "You don't need to protect me from yourself. Haven't I told you that before?"

"But I…I don't want to hurt you," he explained softly.

Lissa gave another tug, and the towel nearly slipped out of place. "You won't, I promise. It doesn't mean the same thing to me, okay?"

He pursed his lips, uncertain…but then nodded reluctantly, just once.

She carefully freed the end of the towel from where he'd tucked it underneath, the only force holding it up, and then pulled it away and set it aside. Despite Ed curving forward, almost trying to shield himself still, she could see the wound from there… A twisted knot of scarring, still pink and inflamed, in some places shiny with new skin, curling outward from a spot just below his ribcage. Lissa kept her hand steady as she reached out, brushing her thumb just below it, afraid to hurt him, and watched his abdomen jolt as he sucked in a sharp breath.

"Does that hurt?" she asked him softly.

Ed gave a quick shake of his head, just once. "No. I just… I didn't expect you to…"

She traced the edge of the scarring with her fingertips, aware chills rose all along his skin in the wake of her touch, but she didn't follow it up to the top—she trailed her fingers along his side, until she could reach behind him and gently touch the edge of the scars on his back, a matched set to the marks on his front. Ed's face was screwed up in distress, but his gaze softened as she used that little bit of leverage to pull him in closer, curling him into her side.

"Do you know what these mean?" Lissa asked, leaning in until her lips brushed just beside his ear—so close she could speak in the barest whisper, as soft as her voice could be.

Ed breathed out harshly. "That I almost died. That I almost failed everyone."

She rested her thumb along the base of one scar, one whorl in the knot. "No. These mean you survived—you have these scars because you lived, Ed. Because you didn't stop fighting, not for a moment." Lissa flattened her hand on his back, smoothing her palm across to his spine, to the warm, unmarred skin there. "It's proof that something inside you kept you going, kept you pushing to get past it, to heal, to find a way out—that's what it means." She leaned back and brought her other hand to his face, cupping his cheek gently so he'd look at her. "That's what it has to mean. We've had too many almosts to focus on them, right? All this is going to mean is that you suffered, and you survived. And I-" Lissa leaned down and kissed him on his stomach, right above the scarring, making him jump in surprise. "-am never going to be disgusted by any part of you. Okay?"

Smiling reluctantly now, Ed tugged her into him and kissed her slowly, his left hand stroking lines along her hip. "Okay, Liss. It's not fair, y'know, I can't argue with you when you get all…sweet and stubborn like that."

Lissa hid a blush behind a smirk. "Well, that's the point, isn't it?" She tapped him on both shoulders. "Now lie back. I need to take care of your automail before we go to sleep."

Ed groaned at that—but he obliged anyway, lying flat on the bed and scooting until his head rested on the pillows, wrinkling his nose. "It's kind of embarrassing that I can't do this," he muttered, as she snagged the little tin of oil she'd set out earlier. "I should be able to take care of myself by now, at least. But no, I can't handle my stupid automail…"

She knelt down beside him, and leaned over him to kiss his forehead. "Don't be like that. You're allowed to struggle for a bit, you know? And you could do it, technically…"

"But then it might not be good enough, and Winry would kill me," he lamented.

Lissa grinned. "And me, for not taking care of you and the automail. So you're stuck with it." The northern automail required a certain type of oil, applied semi-regularly, to stay mobile—and while it hadn't been a problem before, with his injury limiting his mobility and causing all kinds of pain with any motion that required bending in half, dealing with his arm had become a chore…and dealing with his leg had become outright impossible.

She started on his arm, working from the shoulder joint outward with the automail crossed over his chest, still not entirely used to the process. Ed watched her carefully the whole time, pointing out spots she'd missed or places that needed more—which she was grateful for, honestly. The last thing she wanted was to mess this up. While he was still unconscious, she'd done it herself without his attentiveness, and she just wasn't convinced of her skills by herself. It wasn't something she was accustomed to doing, after all.

"I'm sorry you have to do this," Ed murmured, gazing down at his automail sort of spitefully.

Lissa looked up from where she'd been oiling one of his finger joints and frowned. "You don't need to be. I don't mind it, Ed… I'd rather look after you than just…leave it."

Still, he twisted his mouth up unhappily. "But it's…I dunno, it's weird. It isn't actually me."

"Do you remember what I said in Dublith?" she asked softly, smoothing her thumb over the articulated joint of the wrist. "I talked about how it wasn't horrific, how you don't need to worry about these things with me…right?"

He pursed his lips. "It's hard to break the habit, I guess."

Lissa released his arm and wiped her hands off on the nearest towel, taking a moment to rest back on her knees and give him her full attention. "Ed… This… Having automail doesn't make you less of a person. And when have I ever treated you differently because of it?" Yet even as she spoke, the echo of an old insult trickled into her mind—Father Cornello in Liore, sneering, '…not even half a man—hell, not even half a boy!' She'd been angry in the moment…but had pushed it aside, knowing how deranged that guy was anyway. But would something like that have stuck with Ed? The idea that his existence was somehow lessened just because he needed automail?

"You haven't," he conceded, sounding so…weary, his voice rasping through his words. "But that doesn't make it any less true, Liss."

"Oh?" She folded her arms over her chest, aiming at a line she knew would get through to him in a heartbeat. "And what about Alphonse, Ed? What about your brother? Does not having a body make him any less of a person?"

Ed's eyes widened and he sat up to give her a sharp look. "No, of course not!"

Lissa paused, just waiting—and finally Ed sank back into the mattress, pressing his hands to his face and groaning. "Oh," he mumbled. "Right."

"Dummy," she teased gently. "You see? You're only thinking it of yourself…but you'd never think it of anyone else. It doesn't make you lesser, Ed." Lissa leaned over him, propped up on her arms, and kissed him the moment he moved his hands off his face to see her. She was going to move back immediately, but his left arm came around her and pulled her into him before she could. And she just…melted into him. There was no other word for it. Her lips parted against his and she pressed into him, her stomach coiling into knots as she felt Ed's hand slide up her spine, the pads of his fingers rough with callouses yet infinitely gentle, his touch slow and careful against her skin. He was always like this with her… Always cautious of her limits, giving her the time and space to stop him, to change her mind… But no part of her wanted to do that.

Resting her weight on her left arm, Lissa slid her right hand along the side of his neck, smoothing her thumb over his pulse, his jawline…and followed with her lips, trailing kisses along the same path. She shifted along him as she moved down further, pressing a kiss into the hollow of his throat… And then flicked her tongue out, just lightly.

Ed hissed through his teeth and pulled her into him tighter, his fingers digging into her skin. But the motion was so sudden, too quick for her to stop—and immediately he winced and cried out in pain as he drew her right into his wound.

Lissa cursed and jerked off him, sitting back on her knees and resting her hands on his hips immediately to keep him from going anywhere. "Shh, lie still, it's okay," she whispered, aware he'd only make it worse if he leapt up or moved too suddenly. Ed shut his eyes and let out a harsh breath, eyebrows furrowed in pain until the moment finally passed.

"Sorry," he muttered, cracking his eyes open and grimacing at her.

She shook her head quickly. "No, I'm sorry." Lissa slipped off the bed and came to lean beside him instead, and stroked a little hair from his face as gently as she could. "I have to remember you're still injured, y'know? I shouldn't have-"

"No, I…" Ed licked his lips and grinned at her. "I didn't mind."

Heat flooded her abdomen, and Lissa felt her cheeks burn red. "Oh. Well…" She smirked. "I'll remember that for when you're healed, then." She sighed and brushed the moment off, trying to gain some kind of control over herself. "I need to finish with your automail anyway… You're just too distracting for your own good."

Edward's resulting smirk and bite of his lower lip did not help her self-control, not one bit, but Lissa persevered somehow and returned to her task anyway. She got him to bend his knee up and press his heel into the bed, and sat down by his feet to handle the next part. This was a bit more intimidating for her, since Ed couldn't currently bend over far enough to keep an eye on her—so she took it slow, working her fingers into every joint, under every plate, testing the articulation at each step. There was something intimate about this, something that left nerves coiling underneath her skin. But she supposed…it was the closeness, not just the physical proximity but the emotional state, how comfortable they both had to be with each other to do something like this. He had to trust her so completely to allow her to mess with his automail, the very thing keeping him on his feet.

Once Lissa was finished, she ducked into the bathroom for a moment to wash her hands off and run a brush through her hair—she still wasn't sure about the black, it washed her out too much in her opinion—and returned in her pyjamas to find Ed had managed to get his on as well, and had turned the blankets back to make room for her as well.

Of course…he was still lying on the wrong side of the bed.

"You gotta move over, dummy," Lissa teased, standing beside the bed and resting a hand on her hip. "I can't sleep on your left, remember?"

Ed wrinkled his nose at that. "Right." He sighed and scooted over, careful of his side, and the moment he was far enough Lissa slipped in beside him and curled into his right side, her usual spot with her head on his chest and his arm wrapped around her. This was becoming a habit…a beautiful, wonderful habit she never wanted to lose. Creating a routine, spending their days together and sharing a bed at night… It was…domestic, in a way. Like nothing she'd ever had before.

"You'll get me if you need anything, right?" Lissa confirmed softly, the usual promise she had to elicit before she could sleep.

He smiled and tilted his head, pressing a kiss into her hair. "I will, Liss."

"Good." She let her eyes fall shut then, exhausted despite herself—sometimes she just wanted to stay up the whole night, watching him, keeping an eye on his breathing, soothing nightmares before they got too bad… But he'd be upset she wasn't taking care of herself.

Lissa was just about to drift off when Ed's soft voice above her pulled her back. "Hey, Liss… You never did say what Dr. Marcoh told you, in Baschool."

She tensed up under his arm, and felt his fingers curl into her shoulder, supporting her. "I…guess not," she admitted. "There's been just…too much going on, and I didn't…want to focus on it, really." And she'd wanted to forget—but that was a different issue entirely. Besides, it wasn't something she could ever really forget, not completely.

"You don't have to tell me," Ed murmured, as he pulled her in tighter. "But…I just… If it's something I can help with…"

"Nobody can help," she told him quietly. "Ed… Do you remember, when we first met Dr. Marcoh, that he said he knew my parents? He was the first person I'd ever come across who actually knew them…but he…didn't know anything about me."

He nodded slowly. "That's right… He said they were colleagues. It seemed strange, I guess, but I figured…maybe they just…were the private type or something."

Lissa swallowed hard, wishing it were that simple. "I wish," she muttered. "He said… Well… He didn't want to tell me at first, but I pushed and…" Her voice cracked and she broke off as a sudden sob wrenched through her chest.

"You don't have to tell me," Ed murmured, frowning at her worriedly.

But she pushed through anyway, fighting tears as she tried to keep her voice steady. "I need to. I need to tell someone, I…I don't know if it's crazy, if it sounds true, or what, I just… I can't handle this on my own, Ed."

He wrapped both arms around her and curled her into his chest, one hand on the back of her head, like he could hold her together just by that. "Then let me help… I'm here for you, I promise."

It just…spilled out of her. "He thinks my parents experimented on me," Lissa breathed, feeling Ed's arms go tense around her, his chest hitching with a sharp intake of air. "B-because of my alchemy, and my parents being involved in…creating the Philosopher's Stone…even more involved than he was…Dr. Marcoh thought…that might be why they n-never mentioned me…"

"Lissa, I…" Ed cursed harshly. "That's—I… How…" His fingers pressed into her skin, drawing her closer. "How the hell could they do that to you? To their own child? You…" He breathed out through his teeth. "I remember your nightmare…the really awful one you had on the train… You saw…"

"Cuts…all over my arms," she whispered. "What if that was them? What if my parents did that to me? What if that's why I can barely remember anything from before they died?"

For a moment, Ed was silent—he just lay there, stroking his fingers in a soft path from the back of her head all the way down her spine, soothing despite his own agitation… But finally he spoke, in a low, certain voice. "I swear to you, Lissa… I'll never let somebody hurt you like that again… Never. I'm going to keep you safe, I'll protect you every single damn day of your life… I won't let someone touch you like that. You understand me? Never. Never again."

Lissa raised her head, staring at him through her tears, to see Ed's golden eyes blazing with conviction, with the promise he'd made—he meant it. He truly meant it. Rather than focusing on the bad, on the painful aspect…he'd rushed straight for reassuring her and giving her what she needed to even attempt coping with all this.

"Thank you," she whispered, reaching up to rest her hand on his cheek. "I—I can't tell you how much that means to me…"

"Whatever this is, Liss, if that's the truth or not…" He took her hand in his own, fingers curling around hers as he pulled her hand to his lips and kissed the back, just softly, his thumb tracing over her knuckles. "We'll handle it together, okay? You don't have to do this alone."

I love you.

"I don't know what I'd do without you," she admitted, instead of what she really wanted to say.

Ed smiled and tucked her head back against his collarbone. "Well, you're not gonna find out. Not ever, Liss." He kissed the top of her head gently. "Get some sleep, okay? I'll be right here if you need me."

I'll always need you, too.

But she didn't say that—Lissa just curled into him, kept it all inside, and let the soft, steady rhythm of his heartbeat lull her to sleep.


(Omfg it's so *SUGARY*. These two, I swear. I was *going* to go in a different direction, but no, fluff instead. Absolute candy floss.)