Where Am I Going To?

Part Two

Chapter Five

It wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible. Other people, yes. Whores and sluts and courtesans who slept with any man they saw, sure, but she'd given herself to one man and one man only a bare handful of times. She hadn't even so much as looked at another man since him. There was nothing for it.

She was not pregnant.

Mara Jade was very close to hyperventilating. It hadn't struck her to worry about insemination after her all too brief encounter with Skywalker. True, she'd stopped taking birth control after they'd broken up. There wasn't really any need to continue as she'd been busy, and there was absolutely no man that she could look at and desire, not after Luke. Even thought that bastard moved right on to Princess Organa.

"Soul mate's don't exist," he'd told her once. "Not if you're a Sith." She'd stopped believing him after she'd seen him again.

She just could not be pregnant.

She was left to worry herself sick over what all could happen to herself, to her unborn child, to the child's father. Were Luke still a Sith Lord she could probably get away with it. A new heir, the next Imperial Prince. It was still a possibility, but not a very likely one. Now Luke was a Jedi, not a Sith, and that made him the enemy. And she had slept with the enemy. That was not good. That was decidedly frowned upon. Would she be punished for her promiscuous behavior? She very well might.

Unless she aborted it.

No one had to know. Not the emperor, not Vader, who was coincidentally going to be a grandfather – that thought made her shudder. Not even Luke had to know….

But he had a right to know.

No he did not! That stupid, selfish bastard had abandoned all friend and familial relations to join the Rebels, only to turn around and use her. And she was not going to be used like that! Not by anyone! And especially not Luke Skywalker….

Who was the father of her baby.

All she had to do was abort the baby, and it would be as if it had never happened…..

I can't!

She couldn't keep it. Attachment was forbidden. Pregnancy was not exactly a condition easily kept surreptitious. So, really, there was only one choice; the little Jade-Skywalker had to go.

But she couldn't bring herself to do it.

What to do, what to do, what to do? What was going to happen now?

What if she….what if she stayed until just before her pregnancy began to become noticeable, and begged her master for leave to study and train on some distant spot. Assuming she could shield her thoughts and that Palpatine suspected nothing, pregnancy was still a lot of work, and she wasn't sure she knew what to do about it.

Biting her bottom lip, she embraced herself to give herself a little courage. "When the time comes….I'll think of something…."

She didn't know what. She just knew that this had to be a secret from anyone. Even from Luke. Until he came back home to be what destiny had always dictated; Emperor. Was her place of power secure merely because she'd slept with the renegade Imperial Prince? Maybe not. But her child was still of the exact same Skywalker blood as Luke, and even Vader. It might very well be that this child would be an Imperial Prince or Princess.

Or maybe nothing at all, if she had to keep the secret her entire life. Maybe.

I'll have to wait and see.

…

Hoth is cold, Hoth is cold, so cold, I'm cold, it's cold. Cold, Force, cold, cold, cold….

Luke's comlink screamed at him "Luke!" for what he did not realize was multiple times. Angrily snaring it, he flicked it on and shouted back, equally vexed, "What!"

He could hear Han's grumbling voice on the other end of the line. "Sheesh, I've been trying to reach you for five minutes, ya moron!"

Luke didn't mind the insult. It was surprising that they were at a level where they felt that comfortable with each other. It was a level Luke never would have thought he'd reach.

"Sorry," he replied, rubbing at his well padded arms. "I think my brain froze."

Cold, cold, cold, cold…..

"What brain?"

"Har, har," he bit back sarcastically.

He vaguely remembered having wished while on Tatooine for some place that was the exact polar opposite. Well, here he was, on Hoth, which was about as unlike Tatooine as it got. Would he rather be back on that dust ball, tenth rate outer rim system? Nah. The memories or dreams or whatever they were didn't attack him here like they did on Tatooine. Maybe the memories were frozen somewhere in the perpetual ice.

"Anyway," continued Solo, "I've finished my run and I don't detect any life readings. 'Course, there isn't enough life on this ice cube to fill a space cruiser. The sensor's are placed, I'm going back."

Something large struck the ground about fifty meters from Luke, and he squinted at the point of impact, curiosity piqued.

"Ya still there?"

"Still here," Luke absently responded.

Captain Solo waited for a moment for Luke to say something else. When he didn't, the pirate merely shrugged, and spoke instead. "So are you coming?"

"In a bit…." Luke replied, still pondering whatever it was that had hit the ground. "There's a meteor that hit near here, I'm going to take a look. I'll see you shortly." He clicked off the com link before Han could respond, and was suddenly hard pressed to keep his Tauntaun under control. They were smelly and unreliable, and Luke really couldn't wait until they got the speeders adapted to the cold.

"Easy girl," he soothed, patting the fuzzy neck as he reined in her lead. "What is it? Do you smell something?"

Whump.

…

He stumbled through the snow, occasionally tripping to fall flat on his face. He groaned, and pushed himself back up again.

This is hopeless. I don't even know where I am.

Bloody, weak, and feeling distinctly sick from the attack by the Wampa, he trudged through the ice, unsure what fate had in store for him.

This is it. The great Sith Lord and Jedi Luke Skywalker, Rogue Squadron Commander, hero of Yavin IV, is going to die in a snow bank after being attacked by a smelly Wampa. Oh yeah, he could take on Sith and Imperials, Jedi and Rebels, but he couldn't take on an over sized teddy bear with teeth. This is so embarrassing.

As if the wind was agreeing that here was where he'd die, it blew with enough force to knock him over again, and this time he didn't bother getting up.

"Luke…."

No….not possible.

More demanding now: "Luke!"

Breath caught in his throat, Luke closed his eyes tightly and turned his face upward, covered in snow. He was not yet willing to open his eyes.

Master?

He finally did open them, only to audibly gasp. There was Master Obi-Wan, a faded image in the blowing snow. Real or just a dream? Oh, it didn't matter. Luke had dreamt him countless times before. Desperate as a man dying of thirst reaching for a cool glass of water, he began his desperate crawl, dragging himself through the snow. His strength beginning to fail him, he reached out a wretched hand, begging, "Master, please, help me. Speak to me. Why haven't you spoken to me since Yavin IV? Were you ever even really there?"

Obi-Wan made no move to help the boy, nor answered his questions. Evenly and emotionlessly, he merely responded, "You will go to the Dagobah system."

"Dagobah? I don't understand." He pulled himself a few more inches, a foot or more across the frozen waste land, desperate to reach the one person he adored beyond all others; his savior.

"There you will learn from Yoda, the Jedi Master who instructed me."

Luke didn't respond, panting from his effort. Closer, closer. There, just in reach. Begging again, he whispered, "Master…." Reaching out. He had to know he was there, had to touch his hand, hear his voice in all his tenderness and love.

"Luke!"

Gone. Gone, no, it couldn't be gone! With the cry of his name the image disappeared, and Luke, defeated, had to lower himself back down into the snow.

"Master….wait, Master Obi-Wan, don't go."

"Ah, Luke, don't do this to me!"

It was Han, and yet while Luke realized this, he could not acknowledge it. Even with the smuggler's face right in his, he wasn't really seeing him. He was seeing Master Obi-Wan, who, no matter how much affection Luke held for Han, outstripped Solo any day of the week.

"Dagobah…."

"Give me a sign, here, kid!"

Captain Solo smacked and rubbed at Luke's frozen features in turns, reopening the slice on his face the Wampa had given him. Han whimpered slightly worriedly, and Luke opened his mouth to say something, but found he just couldn't. Everything was dark, and all his thought centered on one thought, and one thought only. The same thought that had plagued him day and night for over a year.

Master….Wait….

To Be Continued…

Well, that's it for Mara, everyone. Say "Bye bye," now. You'll see her again at the very end in "Epilogue." You'll just have to wait to see what happens to her and her mini-Skywalker.

xInuyashaxangelx: I considered that to be a rather large plot twist. People generally consider children a substantial happening in the world.

Schnickledooger: RotS was good, but, now call me old fashioned, I just missed the plot so much….-sniff-

Well, it's going to be hard for her to kill him now that she's, you know, pregnant by him. Ah, it sucks to be Mara.

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: That I highly doubt, but the characters do tend to change their minds on my a lot.

Stephanie C: The funny thing is, once he meets up with Yoda, he gets a talking to about how destiny rules supreme. He just explains that his destiny could be different from his father's. It's quite confusing for poor Luke-y.

Shi Feng Huang: Boy, I sure would be if I was her. Thanks, hope you'll keep reading!

Jedi-Princess: Cool, I'll have to look that up.