What a Day 2

Okay, I didn't end it there god damn it, shut up. Anyway, I am moving on now.

For the rest of the day Severus couldn't keep the grin off his face. Its been a long time since I had something that good.Thinking things like this was a problem when Dumbledore called him into his office.

"Ah, hello Severus." Dumbledore said cheerfully. "I see your day is going off smashingly. Care to tell me the joke?" He asked amused and curious.

Severus grin didn't falter, and yes he can grin so MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I am warping your fragile little world. "I think someone messed with my chapstick. A cheering potion, I am sure." Severus said then turned to glare at our mostest favoritest author, How dare you? You're using my first name! You jerk! And you suck. Take that.

Author pops into story to knock Severus down a peg or two to cheers from the assembled readers. "Don't start with me. I am god and can make you meet with Voldemort today. Plus, I can tell Dumbledore why you are happy. What do you think about that?" God said in his most menacing voice possible.

"Oh please," Yes, I made him say please, MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, "You can't, he'll make me do Bella, 20 years ago that was okay, you know? She looked hot then." At Gods nod and agreement, She was a fox back in the day,he continued, "Today its like dry heavin. Shes hideous. What do you want? I can give you the Granger girl." He said desperately.

When he said that God had to pause, "Hmmm...not a bad idea. She is pretty hot with perfect legs and ass. But what do we do about Harry?"

Dumbledore had to interject here, My potions master and God are deciding my students love/sex lives, I wanna fuck around too. "Why not give him the Patil twins? Two for one specials are always nice."

God spoke, "He already fucked that up in fourth year, remember?" Dumbledore looked sad when he remembered. "We can use the two for one, though." Dumbledore brightened at that, "Why notLuna and who else?"

"Why Lovegood?" Snape asked. "And we should give him a slytherin. Maybe Blaise, shes developing nicely."

Dumbledore and God nodded. "I like the way you think. That was a scary thing to say. Anyway, Luna because shes crazy enought to do whatever Harry asks." Sev,yes, I did it, I shortened his name,had to agree with that assessment."Severus, get me Hermione on a silk sheeted bed. I will make it so Harry gets Luna and Blaise. Dumbledore, we need something to fit those three in for there night together." When God said that Dumbledore made a red sleeping bag which God just looked at for a second, "Whatever, that should be good enough. Now lets find Hermione."

And they were off, three grown men and a red sleeping bag. Once they reached the great hall they saw something interesting. "Susan and Voldemort shaggen in the great hall. Hmm, life never ceases to amaze. Not even I knew Susan was an exhibitionist. Lets leave them, Voldemort won't hurt anybody."

"How do you know?" Dumbledore the-all-knowing asked not knowing.

"Because I am the author and God of this story and I say he is good now." God said simply.

Dumbledore and Severus look at each other in realisation, "Ooohhh, of course! I almost forgot."

"Exactly. Now there she is." God said looking down the hall. "Sexy as ever."

"How do we do this?" Dumbledore asked.

"I write the story and get what I want." God said in a matter-of-fact voice. Walking up to Hermione, God waited. When she looked up she immediatly fell in love.

"Love at first sight." She sighed. Told ya. God grinned.

"Lets go somewhere private, Mione." On their way to a private location God shouted, "You two take care of Harry."

Severus and Dumbledore grinned, "Lets play with the twerps mind a bit."

After finding Harry in an overly 007 fasion they came up behind him.

"Hey buddy," Severus started.

"How are you doing?" Albus continued.

"We have-" Sev said.

"A suprise for you." Al said, I even got Dumbledores name shortened. God I am good, probably why I am god.

"Take those 2 girls-" Sev said pointing to Blaise and Luna.

"And this sleeping bag-" Al said handing over the bright red sleeping bag.

"And consider us even, James. I helped get your son a two for one special." Severus finished looking at the sky.

Harry looked at them. "You're my heroes." He said dramatically, then raced off with the two to a private spot by the lake.

The next morning five very satisfied people walked into the great hall for breakfast.

End...For Now.