Title: Lest He Becomes Part II

A/N: SHE'S BACK… SHALIMAR IS BACK!

RECAP: He saw Kali standing up on the other side of the med bed with the monitors no longer attached to her, she had woke up and every time he moved toward her, she flinched away and when she had enough she finally ran to her room.

Chapter 14: The Hurt

It had been a few days since Shalimar had woken from her very painful, sleep. She hadn't really talked to anyone, she couldn't really remember anything at the time; but lately she started to remember. She could only remember the words that Brennan had told her before everything had happened and the trauma she had gone through before they found her. Every time she walked by him she never dared to look him in the eye, afraid of what he would see. She didn't want him to see all the pain in her eyes and she didn't want him to think that it was his fault, although it is possible it was, she wasn't even sure.

Everyone else was just happy she was back, they didn't really notice how she felt; well all except Emma. Emma had tried to get her friends permission to let her read Shal, but they wouldn't budge. The only one she would talk to was Lexa, she would both hug and kiss Jesse and Emma but it wasn't the same. Everyone knew that they didn't really have Shal back, not her spunky, loving, caring and ready for a fight side; not yet. They would just have to wait, that's all they have been doing for days is waiting and it isn't getting any easier.

Everyone had fallen asleep in they're comfy beds, well almost everyone. Shalimar was in her room and Brennan was in the lounge watching television.

She could still hear those words, the ones that kept going through her head non-stop, she couldn't take it, it was driving her insane. "I will protect you" those words repeated. Yeah lot of good that did she thought angrily. She got up off her bed and walked out of her room towards the liquor cabinet, to drown out the pain.

She arrived at the cabinet and grabbed a bottle of tequila; Brennan heard this and walked towards the noise. Shalimar closed the cabinet and jumped at what she saw. There was Brennan half naked (shirt off) wondering what the hell she was doing. She looked everywhere but him, she didn't want him to see the pain and hurt she was going through, the pain he allowed happen. She couldn't do that to him, even after what he did to her. She decided right then and there, that it was all a conspiracy against her.

"What are you doing?" he asked sweetly.

"Grabbing a drink, what's it matter?" she asked in return, with a tone of no emotion.

"Because that's all you've been doing the last few days, drinking" he replied, with a tone filled with care and concern.

"That's not true" she objected.

"Well you only talk to Lexa, give Jesse or Emma a sweet gesture when needed, you won't even talk to me or Adam" he continued.

"Well I'm talking to you now, aren't I" she replied, still not giving him what he wanted, eye contact.

"Why won't you look at me?" he asked, taking a step in her direction.

She remained quiet, still looking to the ground or in the direction of her room, which she desperately wanted to run to.

"Why won't you" he repeated, grabbing at her chin and pulling towards him, to receive the eye contact that he had wanted to receive.

She tried to shut her eyes quickly, before he could see, but he just needed to see a glimpse of it; and that's what he saw. He stepped back quickly trying to erase what he had seen in her eyes, the hurt, the pain, the confusion; that is everything he caused her, everything he didn't want to believe she was thinking but she had, She had no choice in the matter.

She tried to run away but her feet wouldn't move, so she just stood in sorrow looking at the floor. His nightmares had come true, he finally believed that he caused what had happened to her, why she still had bandages around her arms and why she could barely walk, he had caused it.

Emma could feel everything that was going on, the hurt and anger in Shal's mind screamed in her head the moment she had found him, hiding behind the cabinet door. Jesse had woken up because of Emma crying and begging for someone to hold her. Emma knew what was going on in Shalimar's mind but she wouldn't break a promise that she made.

Brennan was still standing in shock at what he had just seen, everything he believed had just come crashing down on top of him and he couldn't stop it. Shalimar just stood, ashamed of what she had done, she knew he was blaming himself and now she just wanted to reach out and hold him, but her instincts told her not to. So she stood, waiting for him to say something but there was nothing but silence, dead, consuming silence.

And then Brennan finally gained the courage to ask what he desperately needed to know. What did he do to cause so much pain, so much hurt.

"What did I do?" he asked quietly, with sorrow and blame in his voice; so the woman in front of him could barely hear him.

She didn't have to ask him to repeat the question, she knew what exactly he had asked of her, and she knew what he wanted to hear. But nothing of what he wanted she could give. She couldn't tell him that he didn't kill the Joey when he had the chance; she couldn't lie to his face, not to the one that she desperately didn't want to hurt.

"You lied" she said flatly, with a sense of fear in her voice and that emotion he could clearly see stencilled in her features.

A/N: Sorry for the wait, my dear old mother grounded me from the computer since my Biology grade wasn't as perfect as she thought it would be. And sorry for not entering other characters in this chapter, but I just wanted it to be an emotional one between Brennan and Shalimar, since she is back and everything. Don't forget to R&R and yes I will try to make bad comments into things I can work on, if you have any of course.