A/N -One of my favorite chapters. Some silly Jelliot moments, some sweet fluff and more. Also - I own NOTHING.
Don't forget to drop a review. Means the world to me when you do :)
The trip was coming to an end sooner than either of them would like it to. As happy as they were to go back to their lives, especially together, it was rare that they got to spend this kind of alone time together. No distractions. Elliot was particularly moody about it. Olivia, while grateful for the time spent with Elliot, was also quite used to having her own space, her own freedom to come and go as she pleased. Not that she minded being here with him, but she also was used to her routine.
On their second to last morning, she woke up before him and saw that it was a beautiful fall day. Extracting herself from his embrace, she saw him roll over and continue to snore, making her laugh. As she crawled out of the tent she realized how sore her muscles actually were. They'd been quite active, in more ways than one but she wanted to stretch out a bit more at her own pace. She loved running and she knew there were plenty of trails around to do just that. She ran often in the city but had come to love running in the woods while Undercover.
Walking towards the tent, she found what she would need and changed. Grabbing some water, she was about to take off when she heard the zipper of the tent signaling Elliot's presence. He poked his head out, bleary eyed and confused, his face red from sleep, his eyes glossy, his hair slightly disheveled, "Liv?"
"Hi. Sorry." She laughed slightly and walked towards him, "Did I wake you?"
He yawned and groaned as he crawled fully out of the tent, "No. Woke up on my own but was surprised not to find you with me."
He reached for her and she smiled, gently tracing his bearded face, "Go back to sleep. You're tired. Once we go home we won't get to sleep in."
His hands slid down her sides and settled on her hips as he tried to pull her towards him, "Exactly. So come back in with me."
She shook her head gently and stepped back, "No. I'm good. I'm actually going to go for a run. I'll be back in a bit. If you're still sleeping I'll climb in. Okay?"
He watched her in confusion as she pressed up on her toes, kissing his cheek gently before pulling away and walking towards the woods, "A run?"
She had slipped one of her headphones in and turned back to him, not sure she had heard him correctly, "Hm? What?"
"You're…going for a run?" Elliot asked, trying to keep up, "In the woods? By yourself…"
She nodded slowly and shrugged, "Yeah. I did it a lot while I was UC. I like it. It's peaceful. And I haven't been getting my normal routine in. I want to get back into it before I head back to work."
"Okay first of all…" He walked towards her, stumbling slightly over the branches on the ground, "We've been doing plenty of cardio on this trip. So that can't be a problem."
She laughed and shook her head, "Yeah well…I'm sore and I want to stretch out."
"I can stretch you out anyway you'd like babe." He said with a smirk as his hands found her hips again, "Just tell me what you need and I'm more than happy to comply."
Rolling her eyes, she shoved his chest back playfully, "Go back to bed Stabler. You're not talking me out of this."
He watched her walk towards the path again and huffed, "You're serious about this? You're going alone?"
Olivia looked back at him, starting to feel slightly frustrated, "Yes Elliot. I am. Like I said, I did it alot while I was out here. Plus I run all the time in the City alone."
He stood up a little straighter, "Are you insane?"
"Oh my God." She threw her hands up frustratedly, "Elliot, I'm not a complete idiot. I know how to take care of myself."
"Yeah but…" He huffed again and put his hands on his hips, "You have your headphones in. You're not focussing the way you should. Not on alert. Anything could happen."
"I pay attention to my surroundings, I promise. I'm good. Seriously. How many people go running or walking alone everyday El?" She said quickly.
"Plenty. And how many of them have we had as victims?" He countered and she huffed, "Liv, I'm serious. I don't like this. I don't want you to go."
Her mouth hung open slightly, "Elliot…you're being ridiculous. You don't dictate what I do or don't do."
Feeling irritated, he crossed his arms over his chest, "So my opinion doesn't matter?"
"I didn't say that. Don't put my words in my mouth. You know I hate when you do that." She growled, "I said you don't get to dictate what I do. Make choices for me. There is a difference."
"So I'm the bad guy for wanting to keep my girlfriend safe?" He asked, pressing his hand into his chest, "I'm the asshole in this scenario?"
"I never said either of those things!" She said throwing her hands up in defeat, "And if you're going to stand there and keep twisting my words then I really am going. And don't you dare follow me."
He cursed when she turned and started walking quickly back down the path. Turning on his heel, he went to the jeep, digging through it to find his sneakers. When he found them, he tugged them on, not bothering to change any of his other clothes, and then he took off after her. It took him a moment to find the path she was on, but eventually he saw her cruising along at her own pace up ahead. Sprinting, he felt a stitch in his side but refused to acknowledge it.
He knew the moment she sensed him because she spun around, "Are you kidding me right now?"
"See…coulda been a murderer sneaking up on you." He said skidding to a halt beside her.
Olivia glared back at him, put her headphones back in and took off ahead of him. He growled again knowing she wasn't going to give up, but also knowing that while he was fast in short distances, he would never be able to keep up in a long run. Especially after his lack of regular workouts later. Taking a deep breath, he tried to stay in stride with her but she seemed to be picking up the pace and he knew she was doing it on purpose to try and prove a point.
He took a deep breath, huffing loudly as he tried to catch up to her. His feet were pounding on the ground beneath him and he focussed on nothing but gaining on her. The more he ran though, the more irritated he became and he realized he should be less surprised than he was. Olivia was fiercely independent and wasn't going to ever give in on things that maybe Kathy would have. And then he realized, that's what it had always been like between them. It was the fire between them. They pushed each other. They fought hard and loved harder and they also knew how to push each other's buttons big time. He was so lost in thoughts he didn't see the root ahead of him and he tripped, flying forward and coming to a crashing stop on the dirt floor.
Groaning, he rolled to his side and tried to assess the damage and was grateful that it was more his pride that was hurt than anything else. He lay there for a minute or two, just breathing and wondering how the hell he had gotten into this situation to begin with. And then he remembered. His girlfriend was stubborn as all hell…but so was he. And then he thought, two can play this game. So he leaned forward, grabbing onto his knee and making a show of it like he'd actually gotten hurt, making sure to be loud so she could hear him even with her headphones.
Ahead of him, Olivia was running hard and fast, she didn't want to look behind her. But she couldn't help herself. Maybe it was the competitive nature in her, wanting to prove she was faster. When she turned and didn't see him, she stumbled slightly and took her headphones out. At first all she could hear was her heavy breathing, and then she heard another sound. It took her a moment to place it and then she realized it was Elliot and it sounded like he was in pain. Her heart jumped in her chest and she took off back towards the direction she had come from. Years of working beside him made her go into protective partner mode. As soon as she spotted him, she ran faster and knelt down beside him, "El, what-"
He sighed and squeezed his knee, "I think I twisted it or something…"
Olivia moved down towards his leg, and tried to move his leg, "Serves you right for being such a stubborn jerk."
"You're really going to make me suffer when I'm hurt? That's harsh Liv." She was looking at his leg but she suddenly heard the laughter, the teasing in his voice and she looked up at him.
And then she knew, "You son of a bitch."
He laughed louder and dropped his leg, "I did fall…but I'm completely fine."
Olivia cursed under breath, smacked him on the chest and stood up, "You asshole! I thought you were actually hurt."
She started walking ahead of him and he laughed, sighing loudly as he rolled over and tried to follow her, "Oh come on Liv…"
"You're a real pain in the ass Stabler. Anyone ever tell you that?" She mumbled, "Why the hell have I put up with you all these years?"
He shook out his leg a little and ran toward her, moving to stand in front of her, "Because you love my stubborn ass."
Olivia looked up at him, gave him a pointed look and shook her head, "At the moment…not so much."
She moved around him and he sighed, "Liv…come on this is ridiculous."
"No. This isn't ridiculous. You're being ridiculous. If I want to go for a run, I'm going for a run." She said stomping through the woods, it was warmer than she anticipated and even the short run she had taken had worked up a sweat.
Elliot continued to follow her knowing he was probably playing with fire, "Yeah alright. Fine. You're independent. I get that."
"Do you?" She asked, still walking forward, not turning to look at him, "I mean…do you really understand that? I know that in the past…" She stopped before saying her name.
"You're right…my relationship with Kathy was different." He saw her stiffen slightly at the mention of his ex wife and he once again ran up to stand in front of her, "But there is a reason my relationship didn't work with her." When she didn't respond, he smiled and leaned in towards her, "There wasn't passion between us like there is between you and me…"
"You call arguing over dumn shit passion?" She asked with a laugh, "You are a strange man Elliot Stabler."
He laughed and shrugged, "We fight because we care and we're both used to being in charge. Is it gonna take me a while to get used to? Sure. But I've put up with you for eight years. And I'm still standing here aren't I?" He saw her falter slightly and he moved closer, thinking he had started to crumble her walls, "I still hopped a plane to go after you, didn't I?"
"Oh you're gonna use that to try and get out of every argument now aren't you?" She said with a laugh, "God help me…"
"Maybe not every argument…but it's definitely something I'll keep in my back pocket when needed." He teased moving towards her.
She rolled her eyes but couldn't help but smile as he wrapped his arms around her waist, "Elliot…"
He pouted softly and leaned in, kissing her, "I can't help it Liv. I'm always going to worry about you. I know you can take care of yourself…but you're my girl. I want to keep you around…you can't be mad at a guy for wanting that, can you?"
She sighed dramatically and felt him swaying them back and forth, "Fine…I get it. But it's the way you approach things, okay? Understand that I am independent. And I have had a life of my own for many, many years. We'll have to find some compromises about things."
"Compromise. I can do that." He said with a nod, "Like right now…maybe we don't run because I'm getting old and I'm already tired but we take a more strenuous hike?"
Olivia put her hand on his cheek and sighed, "You're lucky you're cute Stabler…you know that?"
He smiled cockily and nodded, "I know…"
Rolling her eyes she shoved him back and started to walk a little faster, "Fine. We can hike, but we need to move at a brisk pace, okay? I want an actual workout."
"I told you, we have been getting plenty of cardio done this week. And if you want to up the game…I'm fine with that." He said following behind her, already feeling his heart rate spiking again.
She snorted and kept walking, "One track mind…"
"You can't expect me to not want to get you naked as often as I can." He said with a smile as he watched her ass in her tight leggings.
She smiled, feeling the temperature rising again and she hated to admit that his words had an effect on her. Reaching for the hem of long sleeve shirt, she pulled it up over her head and wrapped it around her waist, still moving forward, "Whatever Elliot."
His head snapped up when he saw her now in just a sports bra and he gawked, "What are you doing?"
Olivia glanced at him over her shoulder and frowned, "Hiking. I thought this is what we agreed on."
"Yeah. A hike. A regular hike. Not a naked hike." He growled, stomping towards her.
She watched him reach for her shirt around her waist and lift it up, "What the hell are you doing?"
"You're half naked." He grumbled moving to lift the shirt over her head.
"Elliot!" She grabbed the shirt, "Are you insane?"
He dropped the shirt down and huffed, "Olivia…anyone could see you."
Olivia's mouth hung open and she looked at him incredulously, "Elliot, we haven't seen many people at all." He still looked at her and she frowned, "Who the hell is gonna be looking? That squirrel over there?"
He followed her gaze and saw the squirrel frozen watching them, "Well that thing is kind of cock-eyed."
"Oh my God." She pushed past him again, her shoulder slamming into his as she walked, "I can't with you."
He sighed realizing he'd stepped in it again and yet he couldn't pull himself out of it, only dig the hole deeper, "Do you run through the city with just your bra on?"
"In the summer? Sometimes." He growled, "Just like I've seen you run shirtless. So back off El."
Reaching for her hand, he tugged her hand, "I'm just saying…there are a lot of creeps out there who will be gawking at you."
"And there are plenty of women, and men for that matter who are gawking at you." She said with a laugh, "What's your point?"
"My point…" They both stood there staring at each other and he clenched his hands at his sides, "My point is that I don't want anyone looking at you but me."
"Elliot…I'm working out. Not at a club looking for a man to take home." She said with a sigh, "Come on…"
He crossed his arms over his chest and frowned, "Liv…I never learned to share. Guess I missed that lesson in Kindergarten."
Glaring at him she leaned in, "Who said anything about sharing? Am I going after one of these men who might be watching?"
"It's just…" He chewed on his bottom lip and sigh, "Liv I spent so many years not being able to have you that it's hard to-"
"But you do have me." She said with a loud sigh, "God…are we really arguing about this?"
"I'm not arguing." He said loudly, "I'm saying I don't like you running in a sports bra."
"Would you like me to run in a parka in the middle of a heat wave in New York City?" She said loudly. "You're insufferable."
"Well now you're just being ridiculous." He said, rolling his eyes, "I never said that."
"Doesn't feel good when someone puts words in your mouth, does it?" She said with a smirk before walking away.
He growled low in his chest and reached for her arm, pulling her back, "Wait a damn second."
"No, you wait." She said shoving him back, "This is stupid. So fucking stupid."
"It's stupid that I want to protect my girlfriend or not want other men looking at her sexually?" He yelled.
"It's stupid that you don't think I can take care of myself or that you think I want another man." She screamed back, "Eight years El…in eight years have I ever put this much fucking effort into a relatinship?"
He took a deep breath and shook his head, "No…"
"So doesn't that tell you that none of those relationships really meant anything to me? That I'm here because I want to be. That I don't want anyone but you?" She shouted.
Elliot stood there watching her, she was breathing hard, staring at him with wide eyes. Her skin was flushed and her cheeks red, lips parted as she yelled at him. And he couldn't help himself. Reaching out, he pulled her against his chest and crushed his lips to hers. He heard her gasp but did not push him away, at least not at first. He backed them up slowly as he kissed her hard, "Liv…"
She groaned and reached out, her nails digging into his chest, "What the hell are you doing?"
He pulled back as he pressed her against a tree behind her, "Staking my claim."
She laughed loudly and said, "Against who? The squirrel?"
He felt her relaxing and knew she wanted him just as much as he wanted her, "Yep."
She rolled her eyes but pulled him back in, "I hate you."
His hands reached out and squeezed her ass tightly in his hands, "No you don't. Otherwise you wouldn't fucking be here."
"Now he gets it." She said with a heavy sigh as he pressed his lips against her collarbone, "Took you long enough."
He growled against her neck and began to quickly push down her leggings as she reached for his sweatpants, "I'm a jealous son of a bitch. That will never change."
Grabbing onto his face, she turned his head towards her and he gasped, "I know that. And I can be just as jealous. But no one else touches me but you Elliott Stabler. Let them look all they want. Let them be envious because they can't have me."
He smiled and pressed his fingers between her thighs, brushing his fingers against her clit, he groaned when he felt she was already wet and ready for him, "Damn right."
"Goes both ways though." She hissed, wrapping her hand around his cock, "No one else touches you ever but me. Understood?"
His mouth hung open and he leaned forward, "Damn Liv…"
"I said, understood?" She growled into his ear, "Say it Elliot."
He licked his lips and lifted his head to look at her, "Understood Olivia. No one touches me but you."
She smiled and moved to kick off her sneakers and tug down her leggings, "Good boy."
He laughed and snaked his hands around her waist, quickly pulling her up, "You know what I love about being in a relationship with you?"
She laughed and felt him press her against the wide oak tree behind her, "There's only one thing?"
He laughed and rocked himself against her, his cock brushing up against her clit with each stroke, "No there are more than one thing. But…one of my favorite things is." He smiled and leaned in, pressing his lips to hers, "When we fight now, the making up is so much more fucking fun." He thrust forward and filled her, making her scream out as she dug her fingers into his back, "So much more fun…"
Panting loudly she smiled, "I agree. It's so much better."
He held her hips tightly, thrusting hard and fast, "Beats the hell out of jerking off in the shower after you left the precinct…" He teased.
She laughed and held on tighter, "Elliot!"
He bit down hard on her shoulder and smiled, "That's it baby…scream my name. There's no one around to hear you."
She dug her nails harder into his back through his henley shirt, pressed her heels into his ass and he slipped forward slightly, "I really do hate you."
"Such a shame." He said lifting his head, he leaned in, his beard tickling her face, "Because I'm so fucking in love with you."
He crushed his lips to hers, swallowing the next moan that was about to escape her lips. Slipping his tongue between her lips she whimpered and gladly let him in. She could feel her back pressing against the bark of the tree and she hissed, "Shit…"
Sensing her discomfort, he frowned, "Liv are you-"
Dropping her legs from his waist she growled and turned her back to him, "Elliot…don't you dare fucking stop."
He saw her brace her hands on the tree for leverage and he grabbed her hips, pulling her down again on his cock, "Ah, fucking hell you feel so damn good."
Arching her back slighty she sighed, "Just-like-that-don't fucking stop."
Leaning forward, he pressed his lips to the red marks on her back and whispered, "Shoulda kept the damn shirt on."
She laughed and reached her hand behind her, pulling at his neck, "If I had kept it on, would we be fucking against a tree like wild animals right now?"
He laughed harder, feeling his breath filling his lungs as he pounded into her from behind, "Honestly? Probably. I was already insanely turned on watching your ass in those leggings."
She laughed again and pulled at his neck again, feeling his beard brush against her cheek before she caught the side of his mouth, "We're fucking insane."
"Yes. We are." He bit down gently on her lip and smiled, "But you love it and you know. Just like you love me." She moaned loudly and he leaned towards her ear, tugging on her earlobe, "Isn't that right Olivia?"
Her fingers dug into the back of his neck and she let out a long shaky breath as he filled her deep, "Yes. God yes Elliot. I love you. Fuck I love you."
He dipped his head into the crook of her neck and followed a drop of sweat sliding down between her shoulder blades, "That's my girl."
She leaned forward, dropping both hands back to the tree and pressing her legs closer to each other, making her that much tighter as he thrust into her. They both groaned at the feeling and he knew he wasn't going to last much longer. Wrapping one hand around her waist, he pressed his fingers between her legs and heard her whimper. "Please."
He gently rubbed her clit while continuously slamming in and out of her, his hips slapping against her ass. "Fuck Liv…"
She felt her legs begin to shake and she knew she was going to not be able to hold back when he got her there. He bit down hard on her shoulder and she felt it in her toes, flooding all her senses and the world went dark for a moment as she came hard and fast. "Elliot!"
Her scream reverberated through the trees around them and he felt her walls tighten around him, pulling him deeper. He trembled as his own release began to pull at him. He pulled out of her quickly and came hard and fast. "Fucking hell."
Standing there, hands braced on the tree in front of her she sighed, "So much for that run."
Elliot laughed and wiped the sweat from his forehead, "We still go that cardio in…"
Glancing at him over her shoulder she smirked, "You make me crazy. You know that?"
Leaning forward, he kissed her cheek, "The feeling is mutual babe."
He smacked her on the ass and she grunted slightly, "How we haven't fucked in the precinct after a fight is beyond me…"
"There's always a first for everything." He said with a little twinkle in his eye as he reached for her leggings, "Here."
She was slightly off balance and he held her arm as she pulled the material over her legs, "Oh I'm sure IAB would love that."
"Tucker would just be jealous." He said with a laugh, pulling his own sweatpants up and over his hips, "I've seen the way he looks at you."
Rolling her eyes she leaned in and slipped on each sneaker, "I thought we went over this."
Cradling her face in his hands he smiled, "Right, right…you only want me."
"Precisely." She sighed and put on her second shoe, "So who cares who is look-"
She froze and he felt his heart jump in his chest, "What?"
Pressing a hand to her lips, she started to laugh, "Oh my God…"
And suddenly he was fearful that another one of the campers in the woods had indeed caught them, "Shit I-" He turned and she started laughing harder, and then he saw it, "Oh my God…"
Olivia's fingers dug into his arms and she dropped her chin onto his shoulder, "I don't know babe…I'm feeling real jealous of Bambi over there. I think she wants you badly."
The female deer stood in the field, staring at them, wide eyed and frozen and his laughter only grew, "This would only happen to us…"
She laughed and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, "Yup."
Elliot laughed and lifted her up, her legs wrapping around his waist, "Come on. I think you've had enough cardio today. I'll stretch you out in the tent."
She giggled and pressed her lips to his temple, "We done fighting now?"
He squeezed her legs tighter and trudged back towards the campsite, "We're done fighting. For now…"
She laughed and held on tighter, "Okay. I look forward to the next make-up session. Maybe Yogi Bear will get a show during that round."
"Or the wolves." He said howling loudly, "I'm surprised we didn't summon them."
She smiled and bit down hard on his ear, "We've still got some time left. And there is gonna be a full moon tonight."
He howled again, "Let the wild rumpus start!"
She slid down his back and hopped off, "Hey El?"
He looked at her out of the corner of his eye and saw the familiar playful glint shining in hers, "Yeah?"
"Race you to the tent." She started moving faster, "First one there gets to choose our next big sexual adventure."
He faltered slightly and then cursed when he saw it gave her a head start. "Damn her…she's good."
And then he was off, but for the first time, he didn't really care who won. Either way, the outcome would be damn good.
As it was there last official night, they were both feeling a lot of different emotions. It had been a trip they would never forget, especially knowing how close they were losing it all. They were happy to go home, but sad to leave this little bubble they had created together. After their argument this morning they were both in much better moods. They knew that it was inevitable that they continually fought because it was just in their nature. But they both knew they would and could weather any storm as long as they did it together.
After they finished eating, Olivia was cleaning up while Elliot was on the phone checking in with the kids. She knew they were excited to see him when he got back, and part of her felt guilty that she had kept him away for a week. She had checked in with them before making the plans official while Elliot was sitting in the Police Station. But they had almost lost their Father and she didn't want to take him away from them anymore than they needed to be. She smiled when she heard him laughing as she finished up the last of the cleaning and was looking forward to sitting by the fire one last time with him.
When he was walking back towards her, she looked up and smiled, "Everything good?"
Elliot nodded and tossed his phone onto the little table beside the fire, "Yeah. They are good. They were wondering if they could come pick us up at the airport. I told them I'd check with you first…I didn't want you to feel overwhelmed."
Olivia smiled and brushed her hands on her jeans, "I'm okay with that. I know they'll be so happy to see you. I think it's a great idea. You should go back to your apartment anyway with them and I'll head home to sort through things at my place."
He saw her reaching into the cooler for another beer before she sat down on the bench seat. He frowned, watching her as she watched the fire. He hadn't thought much about what would happen when they got home. He was so focussed on getting to her, making sure that he made her see the truth so that he didn't lose her. And it had been a dream out here. Even when they were bickering, he loved being beside her. That undivided attention that he got to give her was new and something he would miss.
Since this morning, he'd been thinking long and hard about what he wanted for the future. He knew he wanted marriage. He wanted to have more kids with her, to spend time with her and the four children he already had. He didn't want to spend time figuring out whose apartment they were staying at. He didn't want to spend nights apart. And now that he had fifty/fifty custody…he needed more room for his kids. He wanted them to feel safe, settled and at home when they were with him. But he wanted that home to include someone else too…
"They want to see you too." He said reaching for his beer and taking a swig, "Not just me. They missed you while you were gone too."
Olivia rolled the bottle between her hands and nodded slowly, "I missed them too. You know I think they are great kids."
Leaning forward he turned on the little radio at his feet, a quiet song filled the space. Speaking softly, he spoke life into his thoughts, and wondered how this conversation was going to go. He'd just gotten her back and he wondered if he was about to send her running for the hills again. Then again, they'd come this far and they both seemed to want the same things. So why wait? "So come back to my apartment with me and spend time with them."
She looked over at him, lifting the bottle to her lips she took a little sip before asking, "What?"
He shrugged and then moved his leg to straddle the bench so he could look at her, "Come back to my apartment with me and the kids tomorrow night…"
Resting the bottle on the ground she whispered, "El…you've been gone for a week. They need their Father's attention. I'm fine."
"And what if I'm not?" He asked quickly, she looked back at him surprised, "What if I'm not fine with it?"
Chewing on her bottom lip gently she frowned, "What?"
He saw the hesitant look on her face, the nervousness that creeped in when things got a little bit too heavy for her. He understood it. He did. She'd spent so many years on her own, so many years building a wall between herself and others that the idea of the future was at times overwhelming. The fire and the bright full moon illuminated the look on her face and he knew she needed a minute to breathe. The song changed on the radio and the notes came through loud and clear, transporting him to that night in New York before it all went up in flames…
Well, it's a marvelous night for a moondance
With the stars up above in your eyes
A fantabulous night to make romance
'Neath the cover of October skies
Taking a deep breath, he smiled and stood up again, "Come here."
Glancing up at him, her breath caught in her throat, "El…"
"Come here…" He said with a soft smile, beckoning her with his fingers, "It's our song."
Letting him pull her up slowly, she curled into his side and let him begin to guide them across the forest floor. Resting her chin on his shoulder, she tried to calm the emotions coursing through her brain but as usual, she couldn't. She knew he knew what was going on, and that she was panicking but she also knew he was here, beside her and he was going to walk her through it if he needed to.
"Actually…" His voice startled her out of her thoughts but she didn't move, "There's always been another song that reminds me of you. Of us."
Tilting her head up to look at him she spoke softly, "What song?"
He smiled and brushed her hair out of her face, "Every little thing she does is magic…"
Her face flushed and she rolled her eyes, resting her chin back on his shoulder, "Okay Elliot…"
He laughed and kissed her temple, "I'm serious. All the words apply…and it is how I feel. It even has our initials in it." She gave him a funny look and he smiled, "The whole part at the end, "EO, EO…"
She swallowed hard and tried to change the subject but let out a little laugh, "Elliot…"
"I was thinking about this morning…the whole running thing." He held her a little tighter, pressing her hand against his chest, knowing that what he was about to say was probably going to scare her more but he couldn't help himself. He was tired of waiting, he needed to lay it all on the line, "And the whole compromising thing. I think I came up with a good solution where you can run and I'll feel better about things."
Still not looking at him she whispered, "Okay? So what's the compromise?"
He took a moment, and he knew she could probably feel how hard his heart was pounding. But it was now or never. Either she was in or she was out and he would rather know now if she was out. "I'd feel better if you were running somewhere quieter…like a neighborhood. Queens has nice neighborhoods…"
She faltered slightly and he held on tighter, "Queens…"
"Now that I have joint custody, I'm going to need a bigger place. I don't want the kids sleeping on air mattresses and Dickie is too old to be sharing with the girls. I want a place where they feel settled, comfortable, like they are at home. They'll be with me as much as they are with Kathy. It's only right." He said.
Biting down hard on her lip, she tried to quiet the panic in her heart and mind, "That would be best for them."
Sheh wasn't pulling away and he took it as a good sign, so he kept going, hoping she was really hearing him, "Plus…" His other hand rubbed gentle circles on her lower back as he continued to lead her in their dance, "I don't know about you but…after six weeks without you, I prefer to not sleep without you if I don't have too." He heard her inhale sharply and he pressed his hand further into her back, "Besides, trying to figure out whose apartment we're staying at gets old. And we both know I tend to forget shit at my place and then I look like a crazy person at work and John and Fin won't let me hear the end of it."
She snorted, "So you're making this huge life altering decision because you don't want to listen to our dumbass coworkers?"
He laughed and kissed her cheek, "That and wanting the best for my kids. And…I don't want to wait on that future with the woman I love. I want to start it now. I want to move in with you…not waste anymore time."
Her eyes were burning and she wanted to be the type of woman that just said yes without giving it a second thought. But she couldn't. They were quiet for a few moments, neither of them wanting to break the spell of this trip, of their reunion. But they both knew they were at a crossroads. Whichever way this went would determine the rest of their future. He wanted to be patient, was trying to be, but it was killing him waiting, "Liv?"
Clearing her throat she realized she had to say something, anything, so she lifted her head, "That…would be a big step."
Elliot nodded slowly, trying to read the expression on her face, "It would. But…we have talked about the future. About what we want. You told me your dream was to have a family…a home." Shrugging softly he asked, "Why not start that future now?"
Leaning back slightly she looked down at his chest, "It's just…a lot. I mean…yes I want those things but I have a lot to consider. And so do you…that would be a big change for your kids too. You and Kathy haven't even been divorced a year and I don't want you to rush this."
"She's moving in with Michael." He said quickly, "They'll probably get married. Before or after the baby is born."
She frowned and lifted her eyes back towards him, "So…is this a competition?"
"No. Of course not." He said with a sigh, "I was just saying that the kids are handling that well enough despite everything and they know and like you better. It would be okay."
Stepping back she pulled away slightly, rubbing the back of her neck, "I just…I mean…" Letting out a shaky breath, she glanced up at him and before she could stop herself she said, "Can I think about it?"
It wasn't a no, but it definitely wasn't a yes. He didn't want to ruin their last night but he couldn't help but feel disappointed. Still, he nodded and forced a smile, "Of course."
She knew he was trying to not let it show that it was hurting him and she hated herself for it. Reaching for his hand she sighed, "El…I just-"
"Liv, it's okay." Leaning in he kissed her forehead, "It was a longshot anyway. I mean I'll probably still look for a bigger place…but I get it. I really do."
She saw him pulling away, "I'm sorry-"
"Don't be." He said, giving her a little wink, "We're still good. I promise." Stepping back he pointed towards the woods, "I uh need to…"
She nodded slowly knowing he was probably lying but maybe needed a minute to process his thoughts, and maybe so did she. She nodded slowly, "Yeah sure. I'll be here."
When he turned around she felt her heart sink in her chest. She knew how hard it had to have been for him to be that vulnerable, to lay it all the line for her. Just like he had that first night when he had shocked the hell out of her and taken her to dinner. And again and again in their relationship, saying I love you at the Rangers Game, waiting to make love to her, planning romantic nights for the two of them, going up against his ex-wife no matter the consequences just to prove he loved her. He'd spent six weeks thinking she left him, all the while still fighting for his children. And then, when he found out the truth, he had literally thrown all caution to the wind just to get to her.
She was standing by the fire, staring at it as the sparks jumped to life in front of her. So many different feelings were coursing through her body. She'd spent so long on her own, telling herself it was all she would ever have. She was used to her space, her routine. It was comfortable. Easier than letting anyone in. But the minute she'd met Elliot, everything had changed. Even if it took eight years, slowly but surely he had crept into her heart, her soul no matter how hard she tried to keep him away.
The last week had been something out of a dream. She remembered that feeling walking into the precinct, seeing him with Dani and thinking she had lost him. The pain she felt, unlike any other pain she'd ever endured. Like half of her was lost forever. She never wanted to feel that way again…
Glancing behind her, she realized he was back but he was standing by the lake not coming near her. And she felt it. That fear. The fear of losing him was even scarier than facing the unknown or fear of taking such a big step. She watched him as he stared up at the bright full moon hanging over the lake and her heart jumped in her chest. Maybe this was the moment…the moment where she had to stop fighting it and just feel. Time to reach out for the things she had always wanted, that dream, that family she'd longed for forever.
A home.
And that home…was wherever he was. Tears welled in her eyes and her hands shook at her sides but a song came on the radio and she couldn't help but smile as she listened to it.
Though I've tried before to tell her
Of the feelings I have for her in my heart
Every time that I come near her
I just lose my nerve as I've done from the start…
He definitely heard it, and she saw him freeze for a moment. Then, slowly, he turned to look at her, and she saw a smile on his face, making her heart jump in her chest. She walked towards him slowly, taking a chance and he didn't push her away when she stepped up to him. "It's our song…" She whispered. "Right?"
Taking a deep breath, he pulled her hand and moved her slowly at first, then a little faster to the tempo of the music.
Every little thing she does is magic
Everything she do just turns me on
Even though my life before was tragic
Now I know my love for her goes on
He spun her quickly and titled her back as he sang along to the music, knowing if she said she could never live with him, he'd stay. He'd stay no matter what because she was everything.
Do I have to tell the story
Of a thousand rainy days since we first met?
It's a big enough umbrella
But it's always me that ends up getting wet
He pulled her close, lifting her slowly by the hips and spun her again as he sang louder, hoping she really heard him and understood.
Every little thing she does is magic
Everything she do just turns me on
Even though my life before was tragic
Now I know my love for her goes on
She laughed as he danced faster, letting go of his inhibitions and just living in this moment. This moment only with her. Even if she had hurt him, he was still here, trying to make her smile, trying to prove how much he loved her, would always love her no matter what she did.
I resolved to call her up
A thousand times a day
And ask her if she'll marry me
Some old-fashioned way
They danced faster, and he sang harder, never looking away from her and she felt her heart pounding in her chest. He wanted to marry her. Elliot Stabler wanted to marry her. He wanted a family, a child, a future with her and only her and he was offering it to her on a silver platter.
But my silent fears have gripped me
Long before I reach the phone
Long before my tongue has tripped me
Must I always be alone
And then she realized he was probably just as scared as she was. He had been through this before. He'd lost a love he thought he'd have forever. He'd had to start all over and he still believed. And the thing he believed in was her, in them, in their relationship. In their future.
"Elliot?" She called to him as they danced around the edge of the lake under the moon.
He smiled and continued to sing, "Everything little thing she does is magic…everything she does just turns me on."
"Even though my life before was tragic…" He stopped when she started to sing back to him, "Now I know my love for him goes on…"
The change in the lyric didn't go unnoticed by him and he moved towards her, "Liv…"
On and on and on and
Every little thing, every little thing
Every little thing, every little thing
Every little, every little, every little
Every little thing she does
"Okay." Her voice was clear and confident as it filled the space between them, "Let's move in together."
His eyes went wide and he laughed, "What?"
She bit down hard on her lip and moved closer to him, "Let's move in together. You're right. What's the point in waiting? We both want the same things…why stall the inevitable?" Reaching for him, she held his face firmly in her hands, "A house…a home. All the things I always wanted. I want that…with you."
The smile only grew on his face and he leaned in, "Are you sure?"
Olivia sighed and watched as the moon lit up his face, "Never been more sure of anything in my life El. I'm ready."
He took a deep breath, let out a loud celebratory shout and lifted her up, "Every little thing she does…every little thing she does…thing she does is magic!"
Olivia laughed and wrapped her legs around his waist, "Elliot…"
But he didn't stop, he kept dancing them around the shore and they sang together finally ready to start that future…
E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh
E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh E-oh
Every little thing, every little thing
Every little thing she do is magic, magic, magic
Magic, magic, magic
Oh oh, Oh oh
E-oh oh oh oh oh
I have to tell a story
Of a thousand rainy days since we first met
It's a big enough umbrella
But it's always me that ends up getting wet
As the last notes of the song rang through the speaker, she pulled further away to look at him. Both of them were breathing hard as they stared at each other, taking in this moment. This feeling of knowing they were right where they belonged, right where their future would begin. Her legs slid down his waist and she stumbled slightly, but his hands rested on her hips and held her up. Taking a deep breath, he lifted his hand and swallowed hard, afraid that the spell had been broken, "I…Liv I don't want you to do this because I want it. I want you to…I want you to-"
"I want this too." She said with a sigh, touching his chest gently, "I mean am I scared? Yeah. But…when it comes to us I spent eight years being scared of what I felt. And maybe for once in my life…I'm tired of being afraid. I don't want to wait anymore…"
"So…we're doing this?" He asked softly as he moved backwards towards the fire, "We're getting a house? Moving in together? Starting this next part of our relationship? Taking the jump?"
She smiled and walked with him until they stood in front of the fire where a blanket lay on the ground, "Yep. We definitely are."
Before he could think twice, he leaned forward and kissed her, "I love you."
She smiled and started pulling at his sweater, "I love you too El. So much…"
They started tugging on each other's clothes, completely wrapped up in the moment. Kneeling down on the blanket across from each other, they both stared long and hard at each other. Elliot leaned forward and traced her collarbone, "Hi…" He whispered.
Her eyes welled up with tears and she leaned into his touch, "Hey…"
Leaning all the way in, he kissed her softly and whispered, "Liv, I swear to you." He lifted her hands and placed them on his bare chest, "If you give me a chance…I will love you until I take my last breath."
She felt him leaning backwards slowly and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He settled his hands on her hips and felt her rock against him, and he held her closer. Wrapping her hands against the back of his neck, she massaged the back of his head and leaned in to kiss him, "Sounds like a pretty good deal if you ask me…"
He held her close, and kissed her, slowly, pouring his emotion into every movement. And he felt her body melt into his, her body was warm and felt so right pressed against him. The fire crackled behind them, the music still playing, a new slow love song he'd heard a million times. But to him, all he heard was their song. Every little thing she did was magic…it always had been. She challenged him, pushed him to be a better man, the best man and that's all he wanted to be for her, the best version of himself. Someone that was worthy of her, of her love.
He felt her lift her hips slightly, pushing her feet into the ground below and she shivered as a cool breeze swiftly rushed between them. He sighed and felt the breath hitch in her throat as she lowered herself on top of him, and he felt himself become one with her. And just like that first night in her apartment, he was breathless, amazed that he was here with her. Taking her hand he held it between their chests as they moved together in a different type of dance, his favorite dance. "We're doing this."
She smiled and traced his lower lip with her fingers, trembling as she moved over him, "We're doing this…"
Needing to feel her more, he wrapped his hands around her waist and quickly began to lower her backwards onto the blanket covering the ground. He felt her arch her back up against him, her chest pressing into his, her hardened nipples scraping across his skin and he sighed, "Olivia…"
Her legs wrapped tighter around his waist and pulled him closer, "I promise, I won't run again. I swear Elliot…I'm yours."
He smiled and leaned in, pressing his lips against hers before whispering, "And I am yours."
Moaning loudly, she slid her hands up and under his arms, dragging her nails down his back. He groaned, and moved his face to the crook of her neck, biting down hard on her shoulder, he thrust his hips forward again and again, getting lost in her. Looking up above her, she saw the dark sky, but the bright lights of the stars and the moon. Smiling, she whispered into his ear as he moved within her, "Just you me and the stars…"
Bracing his hands on either side of her he lifted his head and smiled down at her, "You me and the stars…"
"God I love camping." She growled and pulled him even deeper inside of her, "Let's go every year."
He laughed and pulled all the way out of her and she whimpered, "Anything you want Liv."
When he slammed back into her, filling her completely, she cried out into the empty night, "Elliot!"
He was breathing hard but he turned her face towards his, "Look at me Liv…" She was panting below him, clinging to him like her life depended on it, "I'm going to give you that dream. The family…the home…the child."
A slow tear fell down out of the corner of her eye and she held his face firmly in her hands, "I know. You are my dream Elliot. This…this right here is that dream. If I didn't have the rest…this would be enough. You would be enough."
Smiling, he leaned down, kissed away the tear at the side of her temple, her cheeks, her nose and then her lips, "I love you."
Sighing, she felt her body beginning to shake below him and she let go, let go of all of it, all the fear and all the reasons why. And all she saw was him. Them. And that future. That dream. The life she'd always wanted, "And I love you…"
He felt it building, felt her pulling him further and he wished he could freeze time, hold onto this moment for the rest of his life. But as she shattered around him he knew that he didn't have to be afraid. She was with him and she finally understood. Slamming his hips into hers one last time, he came undone, completely wrapped around her. She cried out to him, holding him even closer. They moved together, slower, grasping onto every second, committing it all to memory.
When he looked down at her, he saw the way she loved him, the way she trusted him and he finally felt they were right where they belonged. Taking a few deep breaths, he moved his hand to touch her face, "Liv…"
Nestling into his touch she sighed, "Olivia Benson…living in the suburbs. Who'da thunk it?"
Elliot laughed and kissed her softly, "You said Queens wasn't the suburbs…"
"Yeah well…" He rolled to his side, pulling her against him, reaching for another blanket he wrapped it around him, "Somethings change…"
Dropping a kiss to the top of her head he sighed, "But not everything…"
"No. Not everything." She held him close and smiled, "But some changes…some changes are really, really good…"