Chapter 18

"Baby do you need anything?" Randy asked as John was getting Jessie settled in his bed. Jessie asked for a glass of juice and a sandwich or something since she hadn't eaten all day.

"I'll get it for ya babygirl" John said and he walked out of the room brushing past Randy kind of rudely. Randy raised his eyebrow at the action, he made sure Jessie was settled and went to go talk to John.

"What was that about?" Randy asked John, leaning up against the counter of the kitchen. John looked up from where he was spreading mayonnaise on a piece of bread and looked at Randy, an even expression on his face.

"That" John said gesturing to the bedroom "was about ME stepping up and acting like a father to MY daughter and not letting some wanna be do it for me".

"Excuse me" Randy said wide eyed "is that what you think I'm doing? John I am NOT trying to be a father to Jessie I'm trying to be the friend that she needs right now and that she HAS needed for a while now".

"Oh so you don't think I'm capable of being there for my little girl" John said, a wild expression on his face. Randy shook his head and walked around the kitchen, arms spread in an 'I cant believe this shit' gesture.

"Ok first of all yes I do think you are capable of being there for your daughter. Second of all whats this all about John? Why all of a sudden are you attacking me? Is it really cause you have a problem with me or is it because in that fucked up thing you call a mind that you believe that you aren't a good father to Jessie?" Randy asked, incredulous to how John was being.

John walked up to Randy and shoved him against the wall, he put a hand under Randy's throat and looked him square in the eyes "fuck you Orton, fuck you". With that said John walked out of the apartment.

Randy stood there, shaken by John's outburst. He figured he'd let John cool off and then try to talk to him. Randy went over and finished Jessie's sandwich and fixed her a glass of juice. He took it to his room along with a tray to put it on so Jessie could eat.

"Hey baby John went to get a little air" Randy said sitting the tray on the floor and the food on it. He went over to the bed and helped Jessie sit up and piled pillows behind her. Once he saw that she was comfortable he put the tray of food on the bed and sat the juice on the nightstand by the bed. "Need anything else?" he asked.

"Wanna just sit in here and talk?" Jessie asked, kinda bored with being alone. Randy nodded, smiling, and laid down on the other side of the bed. He and Jessie spent the next little while talking and laughing.

John had been walking and thinking since he left. He felt like a total failure as a dad. His little girl had been through 2 major things and he wasn't there for either. Why couldn't he ever be there for her? He didn't mean to take all his frustrations out on Randy he just needed to vent and Randy was the target. When he got back to the apartment he would apologize. He sighed and started back to the apartment. It was going on 11 pm and it was getting hard to see.

He got back to the apartment and went inside. Once he bent down to let Mollie see who he was so she wouldn't bark he made his way to Randy's room so he could check on Jessie. He peeked in the door and saw that she wasn't in there. He walked quickly to the spare room and saw that she wasn't asleep in there either. He walked to the bathroom and she was not their. He panicked and went to Randy's room and shook him awake.

"Wha" Randy said, still semi asleep.

"Where's Jessie" John said panicked.

"She's right here" Randy said moving his hand over to the unoccupied side of the bed. When he didn't feel a warm body his eyes shot open. He sat up quickly and scanned the room. "Spare room?" he asked John. John shook his head. "Couch?". Again John shook his head. Randy got up and put on some pants and a shirt and he and John set out to look around.

Jessie had been out for about 1/2 an hour. She tried to sleep but found that her mind kept going to various things she had been through. As she walked she thought over everything.

Flashback
Jessie was listening to Shut Up by Simple Plan as she sat in the passenger side of the car while her mom drove them toward home. All of a sudden she heard her mom gasp. She heard a crunch of metal and everything went black.
End Flashback

Jessie started humming Untitled by Simple Plan as she walked, thinking that it fit the mood she was in.

Flashback
A doctor came over to her and said "I'm sorry Jessica, she didn't make it". The she he was referring to was Jessica's mother. They had been in an accident a few hours before, a drunk driver had ran a red light and hit their car. Jessica had came out of it without a scratch on her but her mom had obviously died. The doctors did all they could but the injuries were too severe. Jessica sat there a few moments and digested the information. After it passed through her brain she broke down. The doctor had left her alone to grieve.
End Flashback

Jessie got to the chorus as she kept walking and thinking.

Flashback
Jessie was too stunned at Randy standing there to say anything coherent. Had she gone to the wrong house? She simply handed him her birth certificate and the note Carol had written. She watched his face screw up as he read, after a few minutes of staring at the papers Randy leaned inside and yelled "JOHN I THINK YOU NEED TO COME HERE NOW". After a few seconds John appeared by Randy and Randy handed the papers to him and stood there staring at Jessie with a wide eyed flabbergasted expression. John read over the papers and after he finished he looked at her "shit" he said simply.

Jessie misjudged his reaction and picked up her bags and said "I thought you'd like to know. I'll leave now sorry to have bothered you". Despite the pain in her limbs she started walking down the drive way back the way she came. She had gotten about half way down the driveway when she felt a hand come down on her shoulder. She looked and saw John standing there.

"I cant let you do that. I mean your my kid. Where would you go what would you do? I know this isn't the most greatest situation kid but we gotta play the hand we've been delt. Sorry I don't always sound like a poker dealer I just don't know what to say" before John could say anything more Jessie felt the bags slip from her fingers and her legs give out from under her. She started falling to the ground. Before she hit she felt John grab her up into his arms. "Baby girl whats wrong? Come on what going on" John had a panicked expression and if Jessie hadn't been in so much pain she would have laughed.
End Flashback

"How could this happen to me?" Jessie sang as she looked at the dark night all around her.

Flashback
She walked to it and saw Josh standing in front, leaning against the wall. He smiled when he saw her and when she reached him he gave her a kiss "come on" Josh said pulling Jessie inside the bathroom. Jessie was a bit nervous but she didn't want to over react.Josh lead her to the boys bathroom and after checking that no one was in it he brought her in. "Privacy" he said leading her to a stall. He practically pushed her in and came in after, locking the door behind him."Lets have some fun shall we" Josh said kissing her. He started unbuttoning his shirt and Jessie looked at him weirdly.

"Josh what are you doing" she asked naively.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm taking off my clothes so you can gimme a quickie I mean you are my girl and all and thats what girls do for their men" Josh finished unbuttoning his shirt and took it off.

"A quickie?" Jessie said not believing what Josh said "Josh I've never had sex before. I'm not ready for it. I think I should leave and I don't think we should see each other anymore".

She saw Josh's face go from horny to anger in a split second, she got a bit afraid. Josh's hand came up and he slapped her across the face hard. She wasn't expecting it and didn't see it coming.
"You bitch. I don't care if its your first time or not I need this and you are going to give it to me" with that Josh threw Jessie down on the floor and Jessie smacked her back against the wall of the stall. She cried out in pain and Josh was on top of her in a split second taking her clothes off. He kissed around her body a bit before he took his pants off. Jessie gasped when she saw his exposed member. It was huge. Josh grabbed her hips and said "this will hurt a bit, don't scream" with that he roughly pushed all the way into her. Jessie bit on her lip to keep the scream in. It hurt worse than anything she had ever felt before. Not only the physical pain but the emotional pain too. She couldn't believe that Josh would do something like this to her especially since he hadn't known her that long.

After a few minutes of hell, which felt like a few hours to Jessie. Josh slammed into her one last time and Jessie felt his semen spilling into her. He pulled out of her and kissed her on the head "thanks beautiful". With that he redressed and left. Jessie was in shock. She couldn't believe that had happened.

After she felt ok, well as ok as she could considering what she had been through, she slowly got up and redressed. She was incredibly sore. She felt like her body was screaming at her with every move. Her back felt like it had been shoved through a plate glass window. She slowly walked out of the bathroom and toward the furniture store. She knew she had to put her piss poor acting skills to good use so that John and Randy wouldn't know what was going on.
End Flashback

"I'm sick of this life" Jessie sang "I just want to scream".

Flashback
She chuckled and went to the bathroom. She walked in and went into a stall to do her business. She noticed that she was the only one in there and it gave her an eerie feeling but she didn't dwell on it.
She came out of the stall and a hand wrapped around her mouth. A voice came right at her ear "don't fucking scream or I will kill you". Jessie's heart started beating at an alarming rate. She was turned around and looked right into the maniacal eyes of Josh. Gone were the beautiful oceans she got lost in upon meeting him replaced with a storm swirling around. "Didn't think I'd be here did you. Got news for ya beautiful I been followin' ya. Yea I knew where you were the entire time since after our first meeting at the mall. So who's the guys you been around with? You banging them too?" Josh shook Jessie a bit violently and grabbed her tighter "I saw the initial two but there's two more. Damn I picked a slut to be my girl who'da thought. Well I guess I have to teach you a lesson." with that said he ripped her shirt in two and started unbuttoning her pants. Jessie closed her eyes and waited for the pain. It didn't come though. She felt Josh rip away from her.

She opened her eyes and saw Randy beating Josh. They were on the floor and Randy was on top of Josh wailing away at him while Josh feebly tried to block the blows. She closed her eyes back and slid to the floor. She felt someone touch her arm and she screamed. She knew it was Josh, he had come back for her. She continued to scream. If she had opened her eyes she would have saw Mark there and not Josh. "NO" she screamed "NO! DADDY I WANT MY DADDY DADDY!" she continued to scream for John while Mark thought about what to do. Maven had called the police and successfully pulled a furious Randy off of Josh who was unconscious on the floor.

Mark tried to get Jessie to calm down but it was for naught. She wouldn't open her eyes. He had to get her out of there but he didn't know how. Finally he decided to just pick her up and carry her out. It wasn't easy, she was kicking and screaming but he managed to get her to the car. He sat with her in the back, holding her tightly to him so she wouldn't be exposed to the world. He sat with her while the police got statements from all of the people involved, they left Mark alone though because 1) he didn't look like he was in the mood for anybody but dealing with Jessie and 2) they didn't want to cause Jessie any further anguish. They'd get Mark's statement later on.
End Flashback

"I try to make a sound but no one hears me" Jessie continued to sing "I'm slipping off the edge, hanging by a thread".

Flashback
When Jessie heard the door open she looked toward it. When she saw John come through it she jumped on top of the back of the couch and jumped into his arms. John was shocked and almost knocked over but he used his leg muscles and kept his balance and he held Jessie in his arms. She started crying as soon as she felt her daddy's arms around her.

"Its ok babygirl daddy's here he's here. I promise babygirl I'mma take care of you and its gonna be ok" Jessie nodded her head which was against his neck. John went and sat down on the couch with Jessie. "Babygirl now that daddy's here will you let him take you to the hospital so you can get checked out for injuries or whatever".

"Yes but daddy..."Jessie said tearing up and breaking off her sentence.

"Yea babygirl what is it" John said stroking her cheek with his finger.

"I'm scared. Will you stay with me the entire time" she asked, her bottom lip trembling. Randy who had been sitting on the other end of the couch had to turn his head so that no one would see the tears in his eyes. He couldn't believe how vulnerable and scared Jessie had sounded and it broke his heart, Mark and Maven had similar reactions.

"Of course babygirl. Wild horses couldn't keep me away" Jessie hugged him and pulled away. When she did John noticed that she still had on the torn shirt "babygirl come upstairs with daddy and get another shirt I don't want to take you all that way in those rags".

"Ok daddy...daddy can I wear one of your shirts?" Jessie said walking with John upstairs. He smiled at her and nodded.

"Sure why not but it'll be a bit big cause I'm way bigger than you" he gave her a small squeeze and she smiled back at him.

"That's ok" she said. John walked into his room and over to his closet to get Jessie a shirt.

"Daddy" Jessie called to him "can I wear this one?" John turned around and saw Jessie holding up the shirt he had worn on the day that they shopped for her room supplies. He gave her a questioning look.

"Babygirl its dirty I wore it the other day" he noticed her shrug and hold on to the shirt.

"It smells like you though" she said. John sighed knowing that it was a losing battle and wasn't important anyway. He walked over to her and helped her take off her torn shirt and put the other one on. When she was exposed he noticed bruises all over her back, arms, and stomach. His blood boiled when he saw them but he kept his emotions under control for Jessie's sake.
End Flashback

Flashback
"Sweetie, Dr. Walters is getting your release forms now. We'll be heading home in about 10 minutes. Do you need some help getting your clothes back on?" John asked, the pain showing in the eyes that mirrored Jessie's.

"No, I'll be okay." Jessie replied, gently climbing out of the bed, and slipping on her track pants and John's shirt that she had on when she came into the hospital. "Where's Randy?" She asked, once she got settled back onto the bed again.

"He's outside in the waiting room, he'll pull the car around for us when we get out there." John answered, sitting next to his little girl on the bed, and pulling her into his embrace. "Sweetie, I'm so sorry I wasn't able to protect you. I should have known something was wrong when you came back from the bathroom that day, and the way you freaked out over Tom and Jerry had nothing to do with your mom did it?" He asked, running his hand through her hair.

"No, but I just couldn't tell you. I wanted too, but I was embarassed.." Jessie answered, when a nurse came in and told them they could leave as soon as John signed the papers. John signed the papers and grabbed Jessie's hand as they made their way out.
End Flashback

"So I try to hold on" Jessie sang "to a time when nothing mattered". The words rang true for her. She had been doing that.

Flashback
She saw the plate of food sitting on the counter and smiled at the sight of the biscuits covered with gravy, sausage, bacon and eggs. Her mouth watered. She greeted Mollie who let Jessie pet her then went back to lay down 'must not be a morning dog' Jessie thought to herself and laughed.

She went over to the refrigerator for a drink. She opened it and reached down for the apple juice at the bottom when a sharp pain engulfed her. She dropped to the floor, the juice spilling all over, as the darkness engulfed her.
End Flashback

As Jessie sang the chorus again she started sobbing, barely getting the words out. She wished she had answers for her questions.

Flashback
"I'm sorry Jessie but you were pregnant and had a miscarriage" Doctor Tomas told Jessie when she had been settled in her room. Jessie sat there in shock. She couldn't believe that she had had a baby and lost it. Before she had time to really think though Randy came in.
End Flashback

Jessie came upon a bridge. She wasn't aware of how long she had been walking or even what direction she had been walking in just that where she was now. She walked up and stood on the side of the bridge watching the water swirl in the moonlight.

"Where could she be?" John asked Randy as he raced along the street in the car. It had been hours since Jessie disappeared and they hadn't found her yet. The call to the police proved to be useless they told John that she had to be missing 24 hours before she would be taken into consideration for police intervention. John and Randy had been all over St. Louis looking for her.

"I dunno man I mean she was dead walking the few miles to your house that day she couldn't have gotten far" Randy said keeping his eyes on the scenery passing by for any signs of Jessie, it was becoming increasingly hard to see.

John suddenly turned on the bridge that separates St. Louis from a neighboring town, all of a sudden Randy saw a figure on the side of the bridge looking like it was about to fall into the water "THAT'S HER" he screamed and John floored it to where Jessie stood, staring at the water.

"JESSIE" John screamed racing out of the car "Honey what are you doing babygirl? Come here baby please. Whatever your thinking let's talk it out ok? I love you honey please get off the bridge and come to me". John had tears running down his face and his legs felt almost too weak to hold him up. His voice cracked badly from the emotion he was feeling. He swore in his mind if Jessie jumped into the swerving water that he too would take the plunge.

"No" Jessie said so quietly John and Randy almost didn't hear her "didn't you hear the doctor? I was pregnant. I had a baby growing inside of me and I was such a bad mother that I cost my innocent little boy or girl his or her life" Jessie wasn't crying as she spoke just staring at the swirling water below, a sense of calmness surprisingly spreading through her body.

"Baby no. Jessie you are 14 honey you aren't ready to have a kid anyways. Honey it wasn't your fault that you lost the baby you were just under too much stress and your body reacted negatively. Honey your baby is ok now he or she is...honey they're in God's arms and He is holding them close to his heart and they are looking up at His beautiful eyes and smiling. Honey it wasn't your time to have a baby. Maybe one day down the road but not now" Randy was grasping at straws to try and get Jessie down. He would jump with her if she did. She had become such an important part of his life that he didn't know what he'd do if he lost her.

"Randy" Jessie said quietly. He choked back his tears and took a few steps toward her before replying.

"Yes sweetgirl" he said.

"Do you really think God has my baby in his arms and is taking care of him or her?" Jessie said, she turned around and faced Randy and John, a hopeful look on her face.

"Oh dollface I know it. I know He is. Your baby was one of His children and He loves and cherishes every precious life he creates" John looked at Randy in awe that he could create such beautiful words. He hoped Jessie would believe him and would rethink her decision.

"Ok. As long as they're ok. I want them to be ok." Jessie said, she turned toward John "daddy will you help me down? I'm scared I'll fall". John raced over and grabbed Jessie by the waist and lowered her to the ground. Randy joined them and all three shared a bonding hug.

"I love you so much" was said by all 3 to each other. The bond the three shared was deepend then, nothing or no one would be able to get in the way of them. John and Randy were glad that Jessie had changed her mind and both silently vowed to do everything in their power to make sure the little girl that had wrapped herself around their hearts and souls would never feel pain again as long as they had breath in their body.

John looked at Jessie then at Randy "lets go home" he said and that's exactly what they did.