Estrangesters
Chapter two

"Ghod! What's it like? I mean, to be that smart?" Jane asked.

"Sometimes it comes in handy, but it's amazing how much of life doesn't require even an average IQ." Daria walked on in silence for a few steps. "Most of the time, I'm just more aware of how bad life sucks than most people. But once in a while it's like… I can see it all."

"You can see it all?"

"It's hard to describe. I feel as if I'm seeing the universe the way God must see it. How it all fits together, how it works. It's just a feeling, of course, and it never takes long to come to something I don't understand, and then I realize what all I don't know, how much I still need to learn. But trying to recapture that feeling keeps me going."

They walked on in silence until they came within sight of the school. Daria muttered, "I can't believe I said all that."

Jane gave her a quizzical look. "Why, wasn't it true?"

"Oh, it's true, all right, but now you won't want to have anything to do with me. I'm a freak. Worse yet, I'm a brainy freak." Daria sighed "Which apparently doesn't help me keep my stupid mouth shut."

Jane looked at the girl walking beside her, who suddenly seemed small and vulnerable. "Apparently you haven't been paying attention in school. Lawndale High is full of freaks, of one sort or another. And until you showed up, almost none of them would talk to me. I'm the weird smartass art chick. My choices are hang out with you, or hang out alone. And since I've been hanging out alone for, oh, pretty much my whole life, I'd like to try hanging out with you."

Daria looked at Jane. "You mean that?" she asked with a catch in her voice.

"Sure do," said Jane. Then, seeing that Daria was beginning to blink rapidly, she added, "Who knows? Enough might rub off on me to bring up my math and science grades," and winked.

Daria studied Jane's face intently for a moment, then broke into a small smile.

...

Shuffling through the lunch line ahead of Daria, Jane passed up the cheery colored Jell-o and selected a dish of chocolate pudding instead. Daria, watching, did the same. She picked up a rudimentary salad consisting entirely of a few pieces of lettuce leaf and a single cherry tomato, and looked inquiringly toward Jane. Jane shrugged. It should be safe enough, but each piece would of course have to be inspected before ingestion. But that went without saying.

As they neared the entrées, Jane mumbled under her breath, "I don't trust the country fried steak. Can't tell what's under all that breading till it's too late. The chow mein comes straight out of cans, so it's safer, if not particularly tasty."

"Sounds prudent," Daria said, indicating chow mein to the server.

...

They sat at an empty table and Daria began opening her milk. Jane scanned the lunchroom with an experienced eye. "Uh-oh. The Lothario of Lawndale High has you on visual. Better access your putdown file."

"Who?" Daria asked in a low voice, apparently inspecting her salad.

"The carrot-top at two o'clock. Charles Ruttheimer. Code name Upchuck."

Glancing surreptitiously in the indicated direction, Daria saw a boy with curly hair the same color as Quinn's, surely an ill omen. He was glancing surreptitiously back at her, with an expression best described as a suppressed leer, and hurriedly finishing his lunch.

"Raise boarding nets. Stand by to repel suitors," Daria muttered, drawing a smirk from Jane.

A movement to her left caught Jane's eye. "Belay that. Miss All-American Teen, two points off the port bow and closing," she reported, carrying on the nautical metaphor.

Daria looked. "Uh, Jodie something?"

Jane nodded. "Jodie Landon. Top seed for valedictorian, class of oh oh."

Daria took a cautious bite of chow mein. "I won't fight her for it."

"See the clipboard? She's in press gang mode. She means to volunteer you for something."

"I'll give long odds against her chances of that."

Jodie walked up and sat down opposite the two girls. "Hi, uh, Daria? Did I pronounce that right?" she asked, with a bright, sincere smile.

"Very well for your first time, Jodie." Daria took another bite of chow mein.

"I just wanted to welcome you to Lawndale High and tell you about some of our great clubs and activities."

Daria continued to eat, paying no apparent attention to Jodie.

Jodie looked a bit uncertain but pressed on with her pitch. "For instance, this Thursday we're having a car wash to raise money to send the band to the state band competition. Can I put you down to help out?"

"If we send them, will they stay there?"

Surprised by the unexpected question, Jodie nevertheless recovered quickly. "Uh, no. They'll be coming back, hopefully with another trophy!"

"Then no," Daria said, and took a sip of milk. Jane suppressed a smirk.

"Oh, come on. It'll be fun!"

"I don't like fun."

Jodie was beginning to get the feeling that she was losing a game she hadn't known she was playing. But she bravely picked up where she'd left off and pressed on. "Oh, sure you do. Everybody likes fun! How about I put you down for glee club?"

Daria looked up suddenly from her lunch with a shocked expression. "What?" she asked, sounding as if she'd had the wind knocked out of her. "Have I given you reason to believe I have severe brain damage?"

"Huh? No."

"Then why would you insult me like that? What have I ever done to you?" Daria asked with a hurt look. Dropping her spork, she buried her head in her hands.

Jodie looked confused and a bit guilty. "But... but I didn't..."

Jane jumped in. "Jeez, Jodie, that's kind of mean." She put a hand on Daria's shoulder. "Hey, it's all right. Just ignore it."

Face still in her hands, Daria shook her head slowly. "Glee club," she moaned. "Why?"

Jodie looked abashed. "Gee, Daria, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I'm sorry, okay? Forgive me?"

Daria slowly raised her head and looked intently at Jodie, remnants of hurt still in her eyes. "Well... I guess."

"We really have a lot of great clubs here at Lawndale High, though, Daria. We probably have some built around some of your favorite activities. If you join, you can do the things you want to do and meet people who share your interests, and get extracurricular credit to boot." Jodie fitted her sunny, sincere smile back in place.

Over Jodie's shoulder, Daria saw that Charles Ruttheimer had arrived, and was waiting to take his shot at the new chick. Suddenly an idea came to her. She leaned toward Jodie. In a confidential tone, but just loud enough that Chuck would overhear, she asked, "Do you have a young transsexuals club?"

The effect on Charles was remarkable. Looking like he'd just witnessed a warthog giving birth, he turned and headed for the exit at a fast walk. Jodie's sunny smile was fighting a valiant but losing battle against a similar expression.

"Uh, no, we dont, Daria. Um, you'll have to excuse me. I have to go, uh, check on something," she said as she rose and headed off in the other direction.

"Gee," said Daria, looking from one rapidly disappearing figure to the other, "Was it something I said?"

Jane was coughing. Daria turned to see that she had apparently spilled or sprayed some milk, and was vigorously blowing her nose. "A twofer!" she crowed when she could speak again. "Got 'em both with one question. Never seen it done neater!"

Daria smiled and blushed a little. "You were pretty quick on the uptake there yourself. But tell me. When Jodie figures out that we were yanking her chain, do you think she'll be angry?"

Jane considered it. "Naah. Jodie's got a sense of humor. She'll get a chuckle out of it. But I bet it'll be a while before she tries to sign you up for anything again."