ESTRANGESTERS
Chapter Five
……

Next morning on their way to school, Daria and Jane reviewed the self-esteem test with each other, while Daria occasionally seized temporary control of some hapless insect.

As they headed for O'Neill's classroom, Mack MacKenzie caught up to them. "Hey, Jane, would you happen to know where Jodie is?"

"No. I haven't seen her since algebra yesterday."

"Did she say anything to you about doing something today, or maybe not feeling well?"

"No, nothing like that. You sound worried."

"I am, a little. Last night she said she'd see me after practice this morning. But she didn't show up."

Ahead in the hall, five boys stood in a clump, impeding traffic, looking vaguely belligerent, and glaring at Daria. Mack looked at them and said, "What's going on?"

Seeming surprised by the question, the boys exchanged quizzical looks, as if each thought one of the others had the answer. They shuffled their feet, but stood their ground.

"Well?" Mack said.

"Well, uh… she's a brain," one said sullenly, pointing at Daria. The others nodded, and one muttered, "yeah."

"Yeah, so? So am I. What about it?" Mack replied.

None of them seemed to have an answer to this, and the glances they exchanged were more confused looking.

"I told you before, you've got to do your own homework. Now break it up," Mack said, and they grudgingly moved aside. Mack, Daria, and Jane continued on to Mr. O'Neill's class.

-o0o-

Inside the classroom, Mack looked around, and Daria could tell he was disappointed not to see Jodie. Partly to distract him, she said, "Thanks for helping us with those guys in the hall, Mack."

He turned and looked at her, surprised. "Huh? Oh. De nada. They were in my way, too. What do you suppose they wanted, anyway?"

"I think they wanted to intimidate me. I think my sister put them up to it," Daria replied. In answer to his puzzled look, she added, "She and I aren't getting along very well right now."

Not knowing how to respond to that, Mack said, "Huh. Well, I hope you get it straightened out. And if you see Jodie, tell her I'm looking for her, okay?"

"I will," Daria said as she took her seat. Damn, I'm getting to be a regular blabbermouth, she thought. It's weird the way he just seems so trustworthy. I can barely remember his name, and yet I go and tell him about me and Quinn. Hmm, speaking of Quinn…

Daria had no idea whether she could control Quinn's movements without being able to see her, but, after a bit of thought, she decided to try. Concentrating on Quinn's left hand in case she had a pen or pencil in her right, she willed it to slap Quinn on the side of the face.

Mr. O'Neill started the class and took attendance, asking if anyone knew why Jodie and Charles were absent. There was no answer.

"All right, class," O'Neill began, "Today let's look at an interesting supporting character in Romeo and Juliet—Mercutio."

Daria directed a mental command toward Quinn to say "Mercutio" loudly.

"Apparently Romeo's good friend and sidekick, but is that all?" O'Neill asked rhetorically. "Might there be some jealousy or envy there too? Is there perhaps a little of Iago in Mercutio?"

Daria sent Quinn a command to slap herself again, then followed it up with a command to say out loud whatever she was thinking. I'd give my chocolate milk at lunch to see if I'm having any effect, she thought.

As O'Neill continued to expound on his off-the-wall theory of Mercutio's motivation, Daria noticed that Kevin, though sitting upright, was sound asleep, a drop of drool emerging from the corner of his slightly open mouth. He looks so innocent, she thought, so… moronic. I almost wish he was Quinn, so I could make him slap himself awake…

Kevin's right hand rose a few inches off his desk, then fell back. Daria blinked and stared at him for a second, then a look of concentration came over her face. Kevin's arm twitched again and his hand rose farther before falling back to the desk. Daria smiled a Mona Lisa smile. Kevin's arm flew up once more and the back of his hand smacked into his jaw. Startled, his eyes flew open and he looked around. Daria clamped her poker face on tight and gazed intently at Mr. O'Neill. Jane, Mack, and a few other students turned to look at Kevin, who returned their looks with puzzled suspicion. Jane favored Daria with a speculative glance before returning to her doodles.

Daria heard familiar footsteps out in the hallway. She looked up to see Quinn stomping past in a towering hissy, clutching a small yellow slip of paper. Seeming to sense her sibling's presence, Quinn stopped, turned and glared into the classroom. Daria smiled sweetly and gave her a surreptitious twiddlefinger wave. Quinn bared her teeth, drew a finger across her throat, and stomped off in the direction of Mrs. Manson's office.

Well, whaddya know. Apparently I did have some effect. Maybe now you'll reconsider your goon squad tactics, Daria thought. She smiled a tiny smile. If not, I haven't even begun to think of fun things for you to do.

-o0o-

The bell rang. "Be sure to read Act three, scene one for tomorrow," Mr. O'Neill reminded the students as they headed for the door.

As Daria and Jane made their way to Mr. DeMartino's class, Daria saw that several guys were waiting for her. When they saw her, they spread out across the hallway. Further away, she noticed some other boys who seemed to be hurrying to get in on the action. Daria selected a gawky long-legged one and concentrated on him. As the boys began to close in, one of his feet seemed to get away from him and tripped the guy on his right, and they both fell forward and took out the guy in front of them. Daria hopped nimbly over the tangle of arms and legs and darted into DeMartino's classroom, followed by Jane. The few overeager boys who made to follow were turned back by a withering glare from Mr. DeMartino.

"Damn," Jane muttered as they took their seats, "The kid's playing rough. Good thing that one guy was… hey, wait a minute. Did you make that guy trip?"

"Yeah," Daria replied sotto voce, "I'm starting to get the hang of it."

So, Daria thought as she settled into her desk, little Quinnie hasn't gotten the message yet. She apparently thinks her ability to enslave boys trumps my ability to control her and tips the balance of power in her favor, and she apparently intends to crown herself Princess of Lawndale High, deny any connection to me, and force me to back up her story. What the hell does she think is so awful about me anyway? Lots of people have genuinely obnoxious siblings, but they don't try to deny their existence. And evidently she doesn't think my intellect has any practical value in this situation. Funny, she doesn't think my brain is so useless when she needs help with her homework or gets her adorable little butt in a crack.

Daria recalled the many times she'd helped her little sister with problems, gotten her out of scrapes, times for which Quinn had been appreciative—in private. But if there were anyone else present, especially Quinn's so-called friends, Quinn would treat her like she was a scrofulous nosepicking hunchback.

Lord knows I've tried to get along with the vain little twit. I don't torment her all the time like some big sisters and brothers do, just every once in a while, just enough to fulfill my sisterly duty. And when she comes sneaking around, begging me for help with something, don't I almost always help her? And even when it's something she should really be doing herself, I charge very reasonable rates.

Daria glanced at the door and caught the eye of a boy in the hall, who was staring at her. His truculent expression changed to fear as DeMartino glared at him and made a move to get up, and he quickly ducked out of sight. Quinn's still at it, she thought When is she going to realize she can't win like this? I've given her plenty of clues, but she still doesn't seem to have one. Well, I guess I'll just have to give her a big fat one.

Concentrating on Quinn, Daria visualized her grasping the sides of her desk and slamming her head into it repeatedly. Faintly from down the hall she heard a teacher's voice shout, "Miss Morgendorffer! Stop that this instant!" Stifling an evil grin, Daria made her sister say, in a deep, hoarse voice, "I am the demon lord Kazaroth! This girl's soul is mine! She sold it to me in exchange for cuteness and popularity, and this day I have come to claim it!" She followed that up with some more headslams and a few random expletives, then suddenly removed all control. Quinn's shriek echoed clearly down the hall: "Damn you, Daria! I'll rip your guts out!"

With an effort, Daria managed to choke back her laughter and regain her deadpan expression. Mr. DeMartino, his delivery interrupted, stared unbelieving out the door. He glanced at Daria, then his attention was drawn back to the door by Quinn's pleading voice and the teacher's insistent one.

DeMartino squinted his eyes shut, shook his head, mumbled something, and resumed. "As I was SAYing, the westward exPANsion was greatly speeded UP when…"

Two sets of rapid footfalls approached in the hallway outside. Quinn's voice could be heard whining and cajoling, and the male voice of her algebra teacher saying, "You can explain it all to Mrs. Manson."

Daria thought briefly, then concentrated. In the 'demon' voice', Quinn snarled, "Hey! Four-eyes! The bitch is mine! Get your mitts off her!"

The teacher's voice replied, "Miss Morgendorffer! This sort of behavior isn't doing you any good!"

Still concentrating, Daria had Quinn say, still in her 'demon' voice, "Damn, four-eyes, how long's it been since you got any? Turn me loose and I'll do you some good!"

DeMartino, his presentation totally derailed, gaped at the scene unfolding out in the hallway. Jane, having some idea of what was actually happening, was struggling to keep from laughing out loud, meanwhile hiding her face behind her tattered history book. Daria wore a flawless expression of shocked innocence. As the teacher passed DeMartino's door with Quinn in tow, Daria made her sister turn her head and look inside, then released her from control. Quinn pointed and shouted, "Look! That's her! This is all Daria's fault! She's the one who made me do it! Get her!"

Everyone turned to Daria, who continued to radiate shocked innocence, and then back to Quinn as she was dragged away. Daria waited till all eyes were elsewhere, then sent Quinn a mischievous grin and another twiddlefinger wave just before she vanished from sight.

In the silence of Mr. DeMartino's history classroom, they all heard the sound of a door opening, followed by Mrs. Manson's voice saying, "Not you again!" Then, hearing a crunching noise from beside her, Daria turned to observe that Jane, her face red with suppressed laughter, had just bitten through her pencil.

-o0o-

As Mr. DeMartino picked up the thread of his narrative of the discovery of gold at Sutter's mill and its consequences, Daria scribbled a note and slipped it onto her friend's desk. Jane read:

Jane

Stay sharp on the way to lunch. If Quinn hasn't yet realized that she can't beat me, she'll come after me with all she's got, and she'll do it either during our lunch period or after school. You might want to maintain a discrete distance from me.

daria

Jane read the note, gave Daria a quizzical sidewise look, and jotted a reply. Waiting until DeMartino asked Kevin a question, she handed it back to Daria.

R U kidding? I haven't had this much fun in years! I wanna be in at the kill! Besides, who wants to live forever?

J

Daria glanced at the reply, sent Jane a sardonic look, and wrote:

OK, you have been warned. On your head be it.

p.s.—I hope you won't be too disappointed if no one is actually killed.

She deftly slipped it back to Jane, who read it, grinned and shrugged.

-o0o-

The bell rang. DeMartino said loudly, "Read the section on the Mexican-American WAR for tomorrow. There WILL be a quiz!"

Daria stared out into the hallway as she put her book and notebook into her bookbag. Noticing this, Jane said, "I wouldn't worry too much. She's probably realized that trying to intimidate you isn't working. Maybe Mrs. Manson has helped her see the error of her ways."

Daria's expresion soured. "Manson couldn't see sh:t with her head up her ass," she muttered, "Which is where she keeps it most of the time, if you ask me."

Jane smirked, "Are you saying our Mrs. Manson isn't the veritable reincarnation of Sigmund Freud? I'm shocked! Shocked!"

"And the last time I saw Quinn, she wasn't exhibiting much capacity for rational thought," Daria went on. She slipped the strap of her bookbag over her shoulder and reluctantly headed for the door. "I've got a bad feeling."

Jane went to the door and peered out, then stepped out into the hall and looked both ways. She turned to Daria and said, "I don't see any notably thuggish gangs of boys. Uh, you want to skip going to our lockers?"

"Hmm… naah, we can't really avoid her and her meat puppets without going completely off campus. Just keep a sharp eye out and stay on your toes."

As they neared Daria's locker, the students' movement patterns resolved into the normal one of students walking past to their various destinations, several guys pacing or slouching back and forth trying to look like they were, and several others not even that bright who were plainly goaltending her locker. Daria touched Jane's forearm, signaling her to stop, and they quietly turned and headed for the lunchroom.

-o0o-

As they approached the lunchroom entrance, Daria again put her hand on Jane's forearm. Another squad of boys was covering this door.

"C'mon, let's get some pizza," she said, "I'll buy." They turned back toward the front entrance, only to find that the first set of goons had closed in behind them. Daria called up a mental image of the bees and wasps she'd seen around the school yesterday, and sent out a call to them. "Get your back against the wall," she said, "and don't forget to duck."

Quinn stepped out from behind the line of goons, an evil smirk on her face. "Well, hi there, second cousin soon to be removed. Guess what time it is?" She struck a dramatic arms-crossed pose. "It's payback time!"

"Payback for what?" Daria asked, as she called again.

"Payback for… Don't try to run your mind games on me, geek!" Quinn turned to her thralls and cried, "Get her!"

The boys advanced on Daria, obedient to Quinn's command, but unsure of the proper way to "get" a girl, and aware that a teacher could show up at any second. Daria quickly focused on Kevin, causing him to shoulder the boy beside him into two other boys. One shouted, "Hey, watch it!" and shoved him back into Kevin, who shouted, "Hey, I'm the QB!" and shoved him back again. Observing that the boys were in a very aggressive mood, probably caused or enhanced by Quinn, Daria backed to the wall near Jane and began inciting a similar shoving match among the boys behind her. Shouts of "stand back! I'm gonna get her!" and "Stuff you, I'm gettin' her!" arose. More shoves and a few punches were exchanged.

Daria caused a boy called Joey to throw a shoulder block into a boy named Corey, sending him crashing into Quinn. Both went down, Quinn cursing loudly. She picked herself up and shouted, "Stop fighting! Get Daria! Beat her up!"

"Students! Students! Stop this at once! Er…students?" came the voice of Mr. O'Neill from somewhere beyond the fray. It had no noticeable effect.

Daria saw something she had been waiting for-- a wasp. But before she could do anything with it, a boy lunged at her. She swung her book bag off her shoulder and slammed it into the side of his head, and he staggered into a knot of tussling boys. Jane swung a boot into another young stalwart's fork, and he folded to the floor. Daria relocated the wasp and guided it straight at Quinn's face, causing her to shriek and duck.

"Stop this at once, you rutting beasts!" Ms. Barch's voice snarled from somewhere behind the crowd, "Or I'll have you all neutered!" Now more wasps and bees were showing up, and Daria began to make use of them. She kept them all in the area and aimed more of them at Quinn. Boys began swatting at them, to which the wasps reacted unfavorably. One boy's swat went astray and smacked Quinn in the forehead.

Daria ducked under a boy's grab and stomped hard on his foot. Jane sidekicked another boy trying to get to Daria past her, and added him to a melee on the other side of the hall. Behind the struggling mass, she glimpsed Mack MacKenzie grabbing boys and heaving them behind him.

At this point Ms. Li showed up. "What is the meaning of this?" she demanded. A couple of students near enough to hear her slunk quietly away. Her words had no other apparent effect.

Daria switched her concentration to Quinn, who was batting frantically at the bees and wasps. Quinn sidestepped to her left, which brought her near the principal, and her left arm made an especially wide backhand swing and smacked Ms. Li square in the mouth.

o0o-

Ms. Li stood for a second, frozen in surprise. Then, quick as a striking snake, she dropped into a combat stance, ready to demolish her attacker. But Quinn continued fruitlessly trying to fend off the attacking wasps, totally oblivious of Ms. Li or the scuffles and struggles around her. Quickly sizing up the situation, Li stepped back down the corridor a few feet, snatched a fire extinguisher off the wall, and began hosing down everything that moved with chill blasts of carbon dioxide fog.

In a few seconds, the former combatants had been reduced to shivering, sneezing, caught-in-the-act naughty boys. Daria sent what wasps and bees were still airborne on their way back outside, then, driven by some impulse of sisterly duty, helped Quinn to her feet and flicked a few frosty, near-immobile insects off her back and arms. Ms. Li was meanwhile organizing the teachers to round up and detain the malefactors. "Put them in room 126," she ordered.

Daria and Jane stood quietly against a bank of lockers and tried to be invisible, but an imperious gesture and pointing finger from Ms. Li sent them marching off with the other captives to the interrogation room.

-o0o-

Daria closed the door of the commandeered classroom behind her and turned to Jane. "Well, that was entertaining yet instructive," she said, as they started off down the hall.

"But we missed lunch," Jane pouted.

"But we also missed gym class."

"True. Gotta rate that a net plus. All things considered, I'm surprised we got out of there as soon as we did."

"Yeah, same here," Daria replied, frowning. "I'm surprised any time I catch a break. Makes me feel like I'm being set up for something."

Jane smirked. "You're so cynical! I like that about you. Well, nobody had anything to accuse us of that made any sense, not even Quinn. And we had eyewitnesses to the fact that we were just defending ourselves, Li among them. I'm surprised that you avoided saying anything about Quinn's part in the whole thing.''

"It wasn't to protect Quinn, believe me. The less Li knows about Quinn, the less she'll suspect about me. But I was surprised we got out ahead of Kevin and Mack. Isn't Kevin kind of Li's golden boy? And Mack was just trying to help."

"Li's probably hanging onto Mack because he's a reliable witness. Same for Kevin, in a way. He's too stupid to lie convincingly," Jane said.

Daria turned aside and pushed on a girls' rest room door. "Hmm. I guess that makes sense, in a Lawndale High sort of way."

Jane followed Daria in. "Wonder what Quinn's doing, waiting in Manson's office all alone?" she mused.

"Hoping she won't vanish away with no one paying attention to her, I'll bet," Daria began dragging a comb through her luxuriant dark auburn hair. "Also sweating bullets and trying to come up with a convincing story, most likely."

"Think she can?" Jane asked, likewise combing her hair.

"If she did, it wouldn't help her," Daria smiled unpleasantly. "Li just has to stare at her, and she'll spill everything she knows. Quinn's the easiest person to interrogate I've ever seen, as long as the interrogator isn't subject to her popularity power."

"That should be a very interesting interrogation for Ms. Li, then," Jane said, "I wonder how much of what she gets she'll believe."

Daria stopped and stared into the mirror, her comb frozen in mid-stroke. "Hmmm… Jane, you go on to study hall or wherever. I need to talk to Quinn. I'll see you later."

"I'll go with you."

"No, you'd better not. I may need to call in some people who would definitely be displeased to find that you know what you know."

Jane's look of puzzlement changed to one of realization. "You mean…"

Daria touched a finger to her lips, then laid it aside her nose, and quietly left the washroom.

-o0o-

Quinn sat alone in Mrs. Manson's office on one of the colorful plastic student chairs, gingerly feeling the bumps and bruises on her face as she studied her reflection in her little compact mirror. She looked up as the door quietly opened and Daria slipped inside.

"So, come to gloat? Go ahead, knock yourself out," Quinn said in a miserable tone.

Despite what Quinn had done and tried to do, a part of Daria couldn't help feeling sorry for her. "Gloat, gloat, gloat. Did you get those stings treated?"

Surprised, Quinn said, "The nurse pulled stingers out of some of them, and put ointment on them. It helped a little. Where the hell did all those bees come from, anyway?"

"Who can say?"

"So, Li's not going to do anything to you?"

Daria shrugged. "She just told me and Jane to go back to class, but I doubt that's the last we'll hear of it. I saw you get knocked down a couple of times. Are you all right?"

"I look ghastly, and I'll have bruises," Quinn whined. She looked Daria up and down. "Why don't you?"

Daria smiled slightly. "None of your zomboys laid a hand on me. So, have you gotten the message yet?"

"What message?"

"Your abilities are not the equal of mine for purposes of combat, among other things. That's what I've been trying to get through your thick skull since you initiated your "Attack of the Zombies" gambit. If you'd been a little quicker on the uptake you could've saved yourself a truckload of trouble."

"Ah, now comes the gloating," Quinn said bitterly, "I am the mighty Daria Morgendorffer. None can stand against the power of my mighty brain."

"Not gloating, just a simple statement of fact. What you were trying to do was doomed to failure because of my ability to control your movements directly. You should never have tried."

"It's your damn fault. You insisted on telling everybody that you're my sister."

"I am your sister."

"That doesn't give you the right to go around telling everybody!"

The enormity of the illogic and the denial of reality inherent in that declaration left Daria momentarily at a loss for words. "We will talk about this, Quinn," she said very sincerely, "but not now. Li could come for you any time, and I'm pretty sure she means to interrogate you privately, and none too gently. She's the alpha female around here, and what you've been doing is a challenge to her dominance."

Quinn was momentarily confused by that, but shook it off. "Daria, what am I gonna do? I heard she actually has a lie detector!"

"I wouldn't be surprised; not that she'll need it for you. She probably won't even have to ask a question. As soon as she looks at you, everything you don't want her to find out will just come spilling out of your mouth, just like it does with Mom."

"Daria, I can't help it! I can't take the pressure!"

"And then she'll expel you, and probably me too, and she'll have to tell Mom and Dad why, and then they'll know…"

"Oh, geez, my life will be ruined! But you said you were gonna help me. Can you?"

"Well, I had a couple of thoughts. I could call those government guys from Highland. They could get Li to lay off, but I'd have to tell them about your power, and they'd want to test you."

"Daria, no! You can't! Don't you see, that's what I don't want!"

"It's not as bad as being expelled."

"Yes it is! It's worse! That would be the worst!"

"Quinn, they tested me. It's time-consuming, but I kind of enjoyed it. You'll learn the limits of your power and you might learn to use it better."

"And then I'll officially be a freak, like you! No! I wont! There's gotta be another way!"

Daria fought down a surge of anger. "There might be. But you're going to have to explain to me later why working with the government guys is so awful. And if you call me a freak again, you're on your own, missy."

Fear showed in Quinn's eyes. "I'm sorry, okay? It's these stings, they're driving me crazy! I can't think. All right, I'll explain it later."

"And you'll have to explain to me what was driving you crazy before you got stung. This is by far the stupidest thing you've ever done."

"Whatever! We're running out of time!"

"And that's the smartest thing you've said all week. All right, there's one way you can get through an interrogation by Li without spilling your guts, and that's if I do the talking for you."

"Huh? How are you going to do that?" Quinn asked, and then answered herself. "Like this. 'Gosh, Ms. Li, I admit I was kind of cheesed off at Daria, and I might have said some uncomplimentary things about her, but I didn't mean for those guys to actually attack her! When I saw what was happening, I tried to stop them!'"

Daria released her control, and Quinn jerked angrily and shuddered. "I hate that! I hate it almost as bad as you telling people you're my sister! Isn't there any other way?"

Daria glared daggers at her sister. "Sure. You can hang yourself with a venetian blind cord before Li comes to get you, you vain, selfish little creep!" She turned and stalked toward the door.

Quinn gasped, horrified. "WAIT! I'm sorry!"

Daria stopped. After a second, she turned back. "You meant what you said, Quinn."

Quinn wilted under her glare. "Yes, but I'm sorry. I'm sorry it hurts your feelings, but I hate it when anybody says anything about us being sisters. I can't help it. It's just how I feel."

Daria continued to glare at her cringing sibling for several seconds. Then she said, "That will be another subject that we'll cover in our serious talk. But for now, do you want my help or not?"

Quinn's face reflected a pain that had nothing to do with the stings that disfigured it. Her eyes darted back and forth like cute little cornered animals. Finally, she said, "yes."

Daria stepped to Mrs. Manson's desk, picked up the phone handset, and began punching in digits.

Quinn looked alarmed. "Who are you calling?"

"Mom."

"Can't you keep her out of this?"

"Not possible. Li will call her in for a conference to tell her what she's decided to do to you in any case. But if I call her now, it'll be the three of us against Li instead of just you alone. And I need her to get me in." Daria broke off and spoke into the phone. "Hello? I need to speak to Helen Morgendorffer. …Daria Morgendorffer. Tell her it's urgent."

Quinn let her head sink into her hands. "This day is going to be horrible."

Daria glanced over at her sister. "Not as horrible as it would have been. Hello, Mom?"

-o0o-

Daria hung up the phone. "She's on her way. She'll be here in ten to fifteen minutes. Quinn, I think we should level with her. Not when she gets here or when we're talking with Li, but later, at home."

"You mean, tell her about our… powers?"

"Yes."

"Are you nuts? I thought you were smart. What good is it to have secret powers if you go and tell everybody?"

"I didn't say tell everybody, just Mom."

"Haven't you heard that old saying about three people can keep a secret if two of them are dead? Geez, Daria, Mom may not be the last person in the world I'd tell, but she's pretty far down on the list. If she thinks my popularity might be artificially enhanced-- not that it is, mind you-- she won't let me date till I'm forty! And no telling what she might do with you."

"Hmm. You may, may have a point. But you know Mom is gonna grill us when we get home, and she knows us a lot better than Li does. Which means that the only way you can get through Mom's grilling is if I help you again."

"Oh, crap! Daria, I don't know if I can take it!"

Daria bit back a sharp retort and said, "Quinn, I'm not going to slime your mind, or even read it. If you reject my help, be prepared for the consequences. Make up your mind and let me know after we get through with Li."

-o0o-