AN: I'm so sorry this took so long guys! It wasn't really my fault this time though. You guys know I'll straight up tell you if I struggle to find the motivation to write and I've even outright admitted to getting distracted with reading other fanfiction (the an in chapter six comes to mind), I'm not just a writer after all, I enjoy reading fanfics to. So you guys know I don't lie about why a chapter is late, but I tried this chapter. I wanted to write and I've been trying since I finished the prev previous chapter, and it just wasn't working. I managed to force the first four thousands words (and in my opinion the quality suffered at least a little because of that), before I just seemed to hit a brick wall. Merlenyn helped quite a bit (I'm sure I bugged her at least a little with my constant pestering and angry ranting about Muse Marzanna just being an uncooperative little shit), but it was just stuck. So, got fed up enough to quit for bit, returned to it yesterday after four days away and lo and behold, it got done by 4:30 in the morning today (I'm writing this about half an hour later and hopefully Merlenyn can do a quick beta of it so you can get it on schedule). Honestly guys, I'm thinking I was a bit burnt out and just needed a little break but didn't realize it. But anyway, it's done now, hopefully my break means I can just keep going and have the next out on time, but here's this at least.
Review Responses:
setokayba2n- Thank you! Honestly, it's a really minor detail, hence why I didn't give ant sort of explanation. Besides, Kazuto walked on his own as well, so it's possible the nurses just didn't give it much thought that Marzanna got further than he could've.
harlequin320- Thanks! I'll certainly try my best, but you'll just have to wait and see, won't you?
raynisia- She's got a lot of work ahead of her. You saw a hint of that when she was thinking about what to do in regards to get magical classes last chapter, and you also see quite a few of the things she needs to work out this chapter too. Asuna's fine of course. She's got her work cut out for her as well though, considering her goal of becoming a healer. That can't be easy.
Tempestae Night- *Screams in shock at your sudden screaming* How did you get in my room! Out! Out! I'm writing here!
13stars- That's good! But I can definitely see why you'd forget, I mean, it has been three years. Maybe. Still haven't decided on that too be honest. On one hand, I could definitely see it being something for her and Nero to do together, on the other hand, they are but swordsman as well, so… I was going for abrupt actually, so as long as it was smoothly written, then I did good. I mean really, do you honestly think you can ease someone into 'Hey! Demons are real! They'll murder you and devour your soul if you aren't careful! Oh, and by the way, I hunt them for a living!'. I felt that this was the best way to go about showing that. So again, as long as the writing itself was smooth… You're welcome! :D
TheTerrmites- Awe, thank you! It means a lot! It's definitely gotta be a bit of an exaggeration, I mean, have you seen the train wreck that was the sixth chapter?! It's sweet nonetheless though, and I really appreciate comments like yours.
shadowchaos5150- Oh definitely, it's way too good for him. Before I'd gotten the idea for the harpy at all, I'd been planning on Marzanna barely restraining herself from killing him and just yanking him around to punch him in the face before yanking him close to smile sweetly while she told him that if he ever touched her mate again she would rip his god damned spine out and disembowel him with her bare hands then hang him by his own god damned intestines for good measure. Then I changed my mind and decided she'd just straight up snap his neck from behind, and then I got the idea for the harpy. Not jumping straight in, no. I mean, this is an intermediary chapter, though I'm not sure if you should call it that considering the problems that start getting dealt with here. Probably at least one more chapter before Phantom Bullet, but maybe more. 13stars has been pretty excited about the idea of Marzanna maybe going into GGO before the arc starts, but I'm not really sure about that. Of course her in-laws will know. I mean, Marzanna's been pretty firm in the idea that Kazuto's going to reject her, but we all know that's just character perspective, right? Think about everything I've said in the past about soulmate bonding. Kazuto will literally become half Nephilim, one day he's just going to stop aging. Of course his family is going to know. He only has a finite amount of time with them, and it wouldn't really be fair to let it be sullied with secrets like that and possibly having to cut it short when enough time has passed that his apparent age starts becoming suspicious. Besides, he'll be a magical after the bonding. While JK never really explains the exact rules surrounding the Statute of Secrecy, from what I can tell immediately family is always allowed to be told, and adopted or not, they are his immediate family. I've had an idea or two about it, but I honestly haven't reached a decision of whether I should.
DA Exodus- You'll have to wait and see, won't you? Oh, since becoming an author on here, I think that's become my favorite line…
makoto-18- Hey! How's it my fault you decided not to sleep for twenty-four hours despite knowing you had to work. I mean, I'd like to think I'm decent, but I'm definitely not 'I can't put it down' good. So that's totally your own fault! ≧-≦ I'm just joking! :) I really don't think I'm that good, but sorry for that hope your sleepless shift wasn't too bad. I'm glad you like it though!
Semi-important: So, as I explained above, I ran into some issues while writing this that weren't really under my control. I really wanted to be able to tell you guys that this wasn't one of those times I just didn't have the motivation, I was trying and would have it out as soon as possible, but unless I did an announcement chapter (which I didn't really want to do, as I didn't want everyone to think there was an actual chapter) I didn't really have a way of doing that. I thought of posting something on my author bio page, but I doubt many of you have ever even been to my bio, so that wasn't really helpful. Anyway, point is, I actually do have a Tumblr under my author name, I've actually had it for a while now but originally I didn't say anything because I was just going to reblog writing tips and post fic ideas/promts (still need to get around to that second part), but I'll probably start posting stuff about the fic over there. I would like to say that, yes, my profile already has links to my AO3 and Deviantart, but this isn't a 'hey guys! I have all the things! Follow, favorite, subscribe, do all of it!'. This is a 'hey, I've got this thing that I've had for a while that I'll post updates about the fic on so you can, for instance, pop over there and find out if it's just a tiny bit behind schedule or if I've barely gotten anything done, and you can also ask questions over there'. Technically you could do that last part with a pm here, but it could be helpful for any of you that are to shy to put a name to you question, seeing as I've enabled anonymous asks. And in the case of the other two? My Deviantart is basically just so you guys can see the character images I put together since ff doesn't really have any way to post images unless it's the profile or fic image, but that only leaves one per fic. And originally I just got my AO3 so I could favorite fics only on there, but then I realized some people prefer that site, so I figured what the hell, no reason not to cross-post. Anyway, point is, I'll probably start posting news about the fic over there, so if ever there's a delay or you just have a question, there's that. Again, it's under the same name, but just in case, it's vorpalquickblade. tumblr. com
January 25th, 2025
Closing the door to her room, she leans her forehead against the cool wood and lets out a sigh, then casts a silencing spell on the room. Since waking up the pushy nurses had left her with almost no privacy, and since coming home an hour and a half previous she hadn't had even a minute to herself. She loved her family and had missed them horribly even with the ability to talk to them through Mike, but she just needed a bit of time to herself, needed to be alone for just a few minutes.
Turning around, she froze, her breath quickening. Vibrant blue walls and bedding, silver accents, sharp designs. Designed to be modern, but so horribly similar to the way mobs died, just like-
The 25th floor boss before she flipped out. The fight with Skull Reaper. Kirito almost dying to Kuradeel, to Heathcliff. The battle with Laughing Coffin, 'No! Don't think about that! Anything but that!'
Marzanna was crouching down, holding her head, and hyperventilating. Her eyes flickering over her room wildly, desperately trying to find something, anything to distract her from the images flickering rapidly through her mind. She didn't- she couldn't- Black. Out of the corner of her eye. Turning towards it sharply, she found herself looking at a wall mounted coat rack situated behind her door when it was open. There were three coats hanging from the hooks, the one farthest from her door was pitch black.
Immediately an image of Kirito smiling at her took the place of one of the nameless PKers that died by her blade. Grabbing onto the coat like a lifeline, Marzanna yanked it down desperately. She barely noticed that the coat ripped slightly, it didn't fit her anymore anyway- or that she also pulled the coat rack off the wall, she didn't fucking care.
Burying her face in the black material so she wouldn't have to see her room, she began forcing her breathing to calm down, 'Deep breaths Hanna, that's it just- No, that's not right, my name is Marzanna. I'm sixteen years old. I'm the daughter of Dante and Lily Sparda, the granddaughter of Eva and Alessio. I'm a Demon Hunter, a Beater, and a level 104 front lin- No. My name is Marzanna! I'm sixteen. I'm a Nephilim and a Demon Hunter. My mate's name is Kirito- Kirigaya Kazuto. I'm- I'm-'Marzanna froze as a horrifying realization hit her, 'I don't know who I am anymore…'
That thought terrified her. She knew some people might think she was overreacting, but Marzanna had always had a strong idea of who she was. Sure, who she was had changed as time went by, but she'd always had a firm sense of self. Before James started being abusive towards her, she'd been Lily's daughter and Mike's twin. After James hit her that first time, she tried to tell Mike, but he hadn't believed her. He didn't think James was capable of wrongdoing, and a gap formed between her and Mike. So she'd just been Lily's daughter, Marzanna Evans. She'd never thought of herself as a Potter. Even before James started hurting her she'd hated him, and the feeling had been mutual, but after he started she'd begun consciously thinking of herself as an Evans. When she'd started getting close to her dad and the rest of her family, she started to tentatively think of herself as Marzanna Sparda, Lily and Dante's daughter. As Nero's little sister, Vergil's niece, and Sparda and Eva's granddaughter. Kat, Lady, Trish, and Kyrie's pseudo niece. Then she'd striped herself of Marzanna's skin and donned Hanna's. No longer was she a Nephilim and a Demon Hunter, now she was a Beater and a front liner. Later she added onto Hanna's identity, when she became Kirito's wife.
Now... Now she just didn't know anymore. She couldn't just stop being Hanna, she didn't even remember how. She wasn't even sure she wanted to stop being Hanna. Hanna was Silica's older sister, and best friends with Argo and Diabel, Hanna was friends with Klein and Agil, Asuna and Lizbeth. Hanna was Yui's mother, was Kirito's wife and partner. That girl named Hanna had become ingrained into who she was. Even if Marzanna didn't know precisely who that was, she knew that much at least. On the other hand, she couldn't just not be Marzanna either, or rather she didn't want to. Being Marzanna meant being a Nephilim, it was her heritage, her family. She loved her family, and they'd always be her family, so it wasn't like she was going to cut them out of her life either. Finally, the last major piece of Marzanna's identity, she was a Demon Hunter. She chose to be one, and though her job was difficult and gruesome more often than not, she liked it. She kept people safe, people who couldn't fight for themselves, she was proud of her job. Though her memories of how to be Marzanna were a little faded, she wanted to fit back into the life Marzanna had, but she didn't want to lose the life Hanna made for herself.
Pulling her face out of the coat, the images immediately came rushing back. Marzanna flinched then scowled, 'Yea well, right now you're not being Marzanna Sparda or She-Devil Hanna. While everyone has their weak moments, neither of them would be so weak as to break down in a panic attack as such a tiny thing as a rooms design! Pull yourself together woman!'
Somehow, that is enough to let her push herself up to stand on onto slightly shaking legs, to let her stumble over to grab her wallet from where she'd left it a lifetime ago on her bedside table before leaving her room. Leaning against the door she lets out a slow breath, forcing herself to calm down fully. All the way back before SAO became a death game, she'd taken jobs to save up for her SAO subscription and the NerveGear, but that didn't mean she'd spent all of her money on it. If she remembered correctly, she'd still had some money left over afterwards. Checking her wallet, she's a bit surprised to find a little over three hundred in there, it was more than she'd thought she'd had, but then again, it had been a long time since she'd spared a thought to it. It was enough at least, to buy some god damned paint to fix her room and maybe some other stuff. Her mom had bought her a couple loose T-Shirts and sweatpants to wear until they could actually go replace her clothes, which would no longer quite fit her, so she didn't have to worry about that, but she might need a couple other things. She didn't really know just yet.
After two years of simply relying on herself and Kazuto to do everything and walking everywhere, it doesn't even occur to her to ask her family for help on such a minor thing, or even for a ride. She leaves without a word through the door to New York, and she leaves so quickly she misses the confused and slightly worried looks her family shares with one another.
She jolts awake with a gasp, then looks around frantically, confused at the unfamiliar place she woke up. At her feet Aite lifts her head to look at her in questioning worry, and from the stand near the side of her bed Hedwig doors the same. Seeing her familiars makes her remember that she's home, that she'd repainted her room a dark red color that had felt soothing after seeing the bright blue of player death in her house. She'd even come across a pitch black bed set that she'd bought. It had caught her eye as she wandered the store and reminded her of her mate so she hadn't hesitated to purchase it. It had been more helpful than she'd thought it'd be. Falling asleep without her mate anywhere near her had been harder than she'd anticipated, and though it certainly couldn't replace her mate, curling into the the black black body pillow and pressing her face against it while curled up under the equally dark comforter and desperately trying to pretend it was her mate's chest she was pressing her face to like she had many nights in Aincrad had made her feel silly, but it had been surprisingly helpful.
Rubbing at her face tiredly, she tries to forcibly dispel the images of the dying Laughing Coffin members, which had now been joined by nightmares of her family no longer recognizing her, of no longer wanting anything to do with her after she'd gone directly against their beliefs and killed people. Glancing at her clock, she groans in frustration. Having been doing it entirely herself and by hand, it had taken her a bit too shuffle her furniture around and paint her whole room, and would've taken even longer without dying charms, but even then she hadn't gotten done until it was almost one in the morning. It was now around two forty five. She'd slept for a whopping hour and a half before getting woken up by nightmares.
Sliding out of bed, she snags her only other purchase from the store, a pure black jacket, and slips it on. Opening the door, she's about to head out when Hedwig swooping by to momentarily land on a table in the hallway makes her realize her familiars are following. She already feels guilty for waking them, as they'd had as little sleep as she had, and she doesn't see any need to keep them up, so she quickly reassures them, "You two don't have to come with me. You can go back to bed if you'd like."
She doesn't really get a response from her familiars, but she figures Aite slipping past her into the hallway, Hedwig gliding down to land on Aite's back, and the two of them turning to look at her in a questioning manner was answer enough.
She smiles lightly at them and casts a warming charm on Aite's snake tail, then makes her way up to the roof, leaving out the door to Japan this time. Hedwig takes off to fly in lazy circles around them, leaving Aite to trail behind Marzanna on the ground.
It was snowing again, and it soothed her in much the same way her jacket did, reminding her of her mate and the better times they'd had in Aincrad. She leans against the railing and Aite curls up at her feet while Hedwig settles down on the railing next to her. She simply stays there watching the snow fall and allowing it to immerse her in memories of her mate.
She quickly loses track of time, and has no idea how long she's been up there before the keen awareness that had been drilled into her kicks in and she realizes someone is approaching her, but at the same time she notices that it's Uncle Vergil and ignores it, choosing to keep her gaze on the falling snow.
He leans on the railing on her other side, simply watching the snow in silence with her for a few minutes before casually breaking the comfortable quiet, "I thought you didn't have a preference when it came to the weather?"
She hums lightly, "I don't. Kazuto can't stand the heat though, and he loves this sort of weather. Enough so that when we finally got around to getting a house instead of constantly staying at inns we picked one that was in a taiga."
Her uncle snorts lightly, "I see… What are you even doing up this late? You should be in bed. The training to get you back into shape is going to start tomorrow, and you don't want to be tired for it, especially since no one is going to go easy on you."
She sighs, "I know… Just couldn't sleep. It's really not that uncommon for me anymore..."
Out of the corner of her eye she sees her uncle turn his head to look at her, "Oh? You've never really had problems sleeping. Although, I suppose I haven't really known you and your habits in two years… Still, insomnia doesn't just tend to come out of nowhere…"
She lets out a shaky breath. She supposes that if anyone in her family would understand, it would be Uncle Vergil. It hits her a moment later that her uncle had always had trouble sleeping as long as she knew him, and wonders if it was because of similar problems.
Turning her head slightly to look at her uncle, she decides to simply ask, "Uncle Vergil? Does it keep you up at night? What you did after… after you went crazy?"
He responds without hesitation, "Almost every night." He suddenly turns his head to look at her again, a speculative look in his eye, "I hurt and killed so many back then… Guilt is a powerful thing, Marzanna. It can tear even the strongest person apart… You may not physically be a child anymore, but when you take experience and the long lives of Nephilim into account, you're still just a kid, and guilt can crush even an adult like me or you're grandfather..."
He doesn't push, but she knows he wouldn't have left such a rather large opening to explain if he didn't want to know, he was silently asking without demanding, while still leaving her the option to ignore the unspoken question. She contemplates it briefly, before coming to a slightly reluctant decision as Virgil would be the one most likely to understand out of her family, "... I killed six people in Aincrad… I suppose you could also say that I assisted in killing Kayaba and Kuradeel as well…"
She all but spits the last name, hating that man even more than Kayaba, and it obviously doesn't go unnoticed by her uncle, but he doesn't sound the slightest bit judgemental when he speaks, "Kayaba, I can understand, but what's the deal with this Kuradeel person?"
She growls, "My friend, Asuna, was in a high position in the guild when they decided people in power in the guild needed guards. He was assigned to her, despite the fact she was one of the strongest players in the game. He turned out to be a total creep, stalking her and watching her home, so I humiliated him in a duel to make him go away. He later caught Kirito and I unaware and managed to nail us with knives coated in paralysis potion. He was going to murder Kirito, my mate, in front of me, just for some sort of twisted payback. I managed to call Shuraba's mental form to me, so I threw it at him. The pain distracted him long enough for Kirito to use an Antidote Crystal and deal with him… I can't bring myself to feel even the slightest shred of guilt for either his death, nor the first life I took…"
Her uncle tilts his head, "I'm assuming the first life was that of someone who also tried to kill your mate?" She nods slightly, and he sighs, "Marzanna, that's sadly just part of having a soulmate. You'll do anything to keep them safe, and it won't ever bother you."
She looks away, "I know…"
He sighs again, "Kayaba is rather self-explanatory when taking into account the fact you apparently had to beat him to escape, so what about the other five?"
She can't stop herself from tensing up at that, "... Laughing Coffin… I wish I could say otherwise, but the sad truth of the matter is that there were players who killed other people in that game. With most of them, it was denial or they just straight up didn't believe Kayaba, but then you had Laughing Coffin… They were notorious for not only being the largest murder guild, but also for the fact they knew if you killed someone there that they'd really die, and enjoyed that fact. They took pleasure in knowing they were taking lives and getting away with it. There was an inescapable prison in Aincrad, but there wasn't any sort of law enforcement… It was up to the players. Kirito and I, along with some of our friends, had been pushing for them to do something, but the front liners were more focused on clearing the game. Eventually though, it got so bad that the front liners were forced to act. We learned where they'd made base, and the plan was simply to ambush them with superior numbers and force them to surrender. It… didn't go as planned. First, someone, we never learned who, leaked the information about the attack to them, and they ended up ambushing us, but then, when we'd finally regrouped… We found out the hard way that some of them… had absolutely no intention of being taken alive... People started freezing up, unable to take that last bit of health from those crazy psychos, even though they knew they were murderers… In the end, we ended up losing ten people to them, and twenty five Laughing Coffin members had chosen to die rather than surrender. Five of them died by my hand… and three fell to Kirito's sword…."
Her uncle gains a speculative look, "And now you are having nightmares about it." It isn't a question, but after a moment's hesitation, she nods in agreement. He turns his gaze to the falling snow in thought, "... Lives should never be taken easily, and taking them should never be treated with a light attitude…. but you DID the right thing. As one of the strongest players in that lawless environment, it was your duty to protect the weak, and that's precisely what you did. Even law enforcement in the real world is sometimes forced to take lives."
She looks away, "I know that!" There's a brief pause before she sighs, "... So why is it so hard to accept that I only did what was right."
Her uncle sighs as well, "Because you were raised to believe there were very few, if any circumstances in which taking a life was ok. It made sense in the context of the real world, with our physical abilities and our Styles, I can't even think of a situation off the top of my head where it would be the only solution, but that didn't hold true in SAO. You didn't have those resources, and thus it became the only viable option when they refused to surrender. You're also a good person Marzanna, the fact that this is bothering you so much is proof of that at least. Honestly, I know it's not what you're wanting to hear, but I would be more concerned if it wasn't getting to you."
She absently reaches out to pet Hedwig, who seems more than content to give her that comfort, "... Kazuto isn't having problems with it, but that's because he's pushing it away entirely and refusing to deal with it in the slightest, which is only going to make it so much worse when he can't ignore it any longer…"
Her uncle purses his lips, "That's terrible, and I'm sure the prospect of your mate being in such distress over the same issue is making things worse, you are changing the subject."
She huffs, "I am not. I-"
She's cut off before she can get any further, "They're not going to hate you Marzanna. You're family. They understood and forgave me, what makes you think they won't give you the same courtesy when you actually had a good reason for doing what you did?"
She explodes at that, "Because you'd lost your mind! You had little to no control over yourself! I knew exactly what I was doing, and I made the choice to do it of my own volition!"
Vergil takes her anger calmly, leaving a brief pause before responding, "Are you done?" She just glares lightly at him, trying to catch her breath after her outburst, "Good. Yes, it's true you made that choice with a sane mind, but as I said earlier, you didn't have your power as a Nephilim. You did what you had to, to protect those who couldn't protect themselves. Was it an easy choice? Clearly not. Was it the right one? Yes. Someone had to make the decision, and you said yourself that not all those in your group were capable of doing it, they died because they couldn't do what was necessary to protect themselves, much less protect the weak. Which left the decision to you…. It's not an easy burden to bare, but that burden is the cost of doing what was right to protect, not just those who can't protect themselves, but those amongst the group that couldn't make that choice, no matter how necessary it became." There's a brief pause before her uncle sighs, "Marzanna…. It's your burden to bear, but you shouldn't let it hold you back. You have to move on, sooner or later." She doesn't say anything, and he sighs again, "Your training can be put off for a day, I think there's some dreamless sleep potion in the bathroom, and I'll talk to your mom about stocking up on it tomorrow…"
She nods slowly, and without a word, she and her familiars head back inside, leaving her uncle on the roof, watching the snow in contemplation. She's sure that by the time she wakes up tomorrow, her family will know what she's done, and that terrifies her… But it's bound to happen sooner or later, and at least if Vergil tells them she won't have to, and she'll be able to stop worrying about how they'll react. Of course, she'll also have to deal with their reactions, one way or another, but… Well, she'd cross that bridge tomorrow.
January 26, 2025
When she next wakes up, she simply lays in bed for a while, reluctant to face the consequences of her actions. Rolling onto her back, she glances at her clock and is slightly surprised to see that it is already past four in the afternoon. She'd like to just stay in bed and not have to face her family, but the problem with that is that she's really hungry.
With a sigh, she pulls the covers off and slips out of bed. Aite stretches leisurely, then hops off her bed to follow, and Hedwig quickly lands on the Nandu's back. She sighs again as she looks at her familiars, "Time to face the music…"
Aite rubs her face into her leg comfortingly, even as Shuraba speaks up, 'I'm sure it won't be as bad as you think it will, Mistress. Your uncle had some very good points last night.'
She shrugs, sending back, 'I suppose we'll see how things are going to go soon enough…'
Slowly making her way downstairs, she's slightly glad not to run into anyone, but she hesitates outside of the kitchen upon hearing someone moving around. Taking a deep breath to steel herself, she opens the door and quickly slips in. Only her mom is inside, which she's grateful for, but it does mean it's one of her parents she'll have to face first.
At hearing the door open and close, her mother looks up from what she'd been doing, giving her a sad smile, "Hey sweetheart, finally decided to get up?"
She shrugs lightly before mumbling out, "Only woke up a bit ago, and I'm hungry…"
Her mom nods in understanding, then points at the table, "Just take a seat, I'll make you something."
An awkward silence descends over the kitchen as she hesitantly sits down and her mother begins quickly making her food. When it's done, her mother sits down across from her with a cup of tea after setting the plate in front of her, and the awkward quiet continues until her mom sighs tiredly, "Sweetheart… You don't honestly believe we'd be angry at you for doing what you had to, do you?" She's entirely unsure how to respond to that, and she can't even bring herself to meet her mom's gaze anyway, but that's apparently enough of an answer in and of itself, as her mom sighs again, "Marzanna… We aren't. We really do understand that you only did what you had to. The only anger anyone, including you father who I'm sure is the one you've been most worried about, has over this is at the fact you were pushed into a situation that required you to do that in the first place, not at you for actually doing it."
She purses her lips, "I killed people, how can you possibly be ok with that?!"
Her mom sighs lightly, "Sweetheart… What you need to realize, is that despite our stance on how we shouldn't abuse our power and hurt, much less kill humans, more than half of our family has found themselves in a position where they were forced to take someone's life. As you grandmother said before she left, even angels sometimes have to kill humans. Admittedly it's rare, and it's usually people who have made deals with demons, often selling their souls, but even your grandmother and the other angels have taken human lives."
Marzanna's gaze drops to her food, and for a minute she simply pushes it around the plate, unsure how to respond. Finally, she simply lets the topic go and asks what's been bugging her almost the entire time since she woke up, "... Where is anyone anyway? I can't hear anyone else in the house at all."
Her mom purses her lips, not quite happy at the shift of topic, but answers nonetheless, "It's just you and me. We didn't want you to feel like you were under attack and overwhelmed, so it was decided that everyone else would simply… make themselves scarce. Though there was a considerable amount of… debate… over who would stay to talk to you."
Marzanna can't help but snort at that. It may prevent her from feeling 'overwhelmed', but the fact of the matter was that she'd stress over exactly how the various members of her family would take it until she saw for herself, especially when it came to her dad. So, for all that it alleviated one problem, it only fanned the flames of a another. She stabs her food with her fork in annoyance, though mostly towards herself, "And they picked you?"
She winces almost immediately, it had come out far harsher than she'd intended, and she was already in a rather precarious position with her family. Her mother simply sighs though, "Yes. Me…. I've never told you this, but I did end up taking the lives of some Death Eaters while working in the Order…" Marzanna lifts her head to stare at her mother in slight disbelief. She'd definitely never heard about that. Her mom gives her a slightly bitter smile at that, "I suppose it's only natural though. What parent wouldn't try and protect their child from a war that ended before they were old enough to really understand… It doesn't change what happened though, nor does it change the weight of the lives I took. The thing is though Sweetheart, in cases like ours, you also need to take into account the numerous lives you saved by taking those handful of others. I know it can be hard sometimes, it can be extremely difficult to look past the immediately effects of your actions, of the fact you snuffed out those lives, no matter your reasoning, but you must. You have to look at the bigger picture, otherwise… Otherwise it's likely to drive you insane. I can't force you to see the wider reaching consequences, nor can I force you to take into consideration that you saved lives even as you took others, but I refuse to let you believe that we think any less of you."
Marzanna looks down, "How can you not though? The people I killed… they weren't Death Eaters mom. There probably wasn't even a single magical amongst them… They were just regular magicless humans, not- not those monsters."
Her mother raises an eyebrow at her, "Psychopaths that take immense joy in killing and tormenting others for little to no reason… No, they sound exactly like the Death Eaters, enough so that it's impossible to tell which I was talking about. No, they didn't have magic, but neither did you really, while you were in that world. If anything, I actually want to say they're worse than Death Eaters in a way. At least they had a reason for their actions, as wrong and messed up as that reason was. From my understanding, the members of this 'Laughing Coffin' killed purely for the thrill of it. I know it's hard sweetheart, but you've gotta let it go and forgive yourself."
Marzanna scowls into her food, "How could I possibly just let go of it, like it's inconsequential that I killed five people, snuffed out their lives like- like it meant nothing! Like they didn't matter! I can't even tell you there screen names, much less anything about them! They were people with lives and probably family and friends and I just ended it all for them! I can't just forget! Are you honestly telling me that's what you did? You killed those people in the war then just- just forgot?!"
Her mother shakes her head, completely calm in the face of her turbulent emotions, "Nor should you, but you shouldn't allow it to destroy you, like it is now. It's one thing to acknowledge the weight of the actions you took out of necessity, and another entirely to let it control you."
Marzanna looks away and there's a beat of silence before her mother sighs, "As for the people I killed… Most of them were simply in the heat of battle. You can't always stay nonlethal in a fight like that, and even if you do, that doesn't guarantee your opponent won't die. They could get hit by a stay killing curse while unconscious and/or bound for example. I don't really remember those ones all that well, I fought quite a few Death Eaters back then, and I honestly couldn't tell you exactly which ones survived and which didn't. The only people I really, truly remember killing… It was not long after the yearly Hogwarts letters had been sent out, and despite the perilous circumstances, Diagon Alley was exceedingly busy with families getting everything their children would need for school. I suppose they were simply unable to resist such a large target, but not many in the Order, or even amongst the Aurors, were surprised when the Death Eaters attacked. Not long after the Order showed up, I came across a group of Death Eaters surrounding a few families they'd rounded up. It was clear they were muggles and muggleborn and that the kids were first years brand new to the magical world, it was also equally obvious that the Death Eaters had been torturing and killing the children's parents in front of them. Only one of the parents was still alive by the time I got there...
Her mother sighs again, her gaze dropping to the table, her eyes narrowing as she purses her lips while her hands tighten on her cup and her shoulders hunched inwards. All in all, her mother looks like a person who's got the weight of the world on their shoulders, "... Killing those people…. it did haunt me for quite a while, it still gives me nightmares every now and then, but… if I hadn't done what I had, those kids would've died." She lifts her gaze and relaxes some, but not entirely, "As I said, it wasn't the only time the war forced me to kill either, and for all the Order believes in trying to capture the Death Eaters, in battle it isn't always possible to take your enemy alive. Furthermore, the war is restarting, and Mike will be dragged right into the center of it. Above all else, the belief our family holds onto, is that you always have your family's backs. You always support one another. This takes precedence above any of our other ideals. We will support your brother, even if that means fighting in a war. A war that has nothing to do with us, that might, and very well could, force us to go against our other beliefs and take the lives of humans. I won't tell you, 'this doesn't change anything', because that's a lie. Having to kill someone… it almost always changes a person. If anything, I'd be more concerned if it didn't change or affect you, because generally speaking, that only happens if you took that life in defence of your mate… or if you're a psychopath. That doesn't mean you should let it devour you though, you're still you in the end. Changed perhaps, but still you."
Marzanna pushes her food around a bit, before quietly saying, "... But I don't even know who I am anymore…" Lifting her head, she sees her mother's eyes go wide, and she smiles bitterly, before dropping her gaze again, "Because you see, Marzanna has her family- her parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles, her heritage and her pride in her job as a Demon Hunter- a protector of those unable to protect themselves, but Hanna… Hanna has her friends- Argo, Diabel, Asuna, Lizbeth, Klein, Agil, a makeshift family- a sister in Silica, a husband in Kirito, and even an adoptive daughter in Yui, she has her pride as a Front Liner- someone who fights for those unable to fight for themselves. They're rather similar, but they… they aren't the same, and I don't know how to be both. I don't… I don't quite remember how to be Marzanna and I don't want to lose what she had, but I can't not be Hanna, she also possess to many bonds important to my heart to let go. It's- It's like Marzanna left this hole in the world that Hanna just doesn't know how to fill anymore, but that everyone expects me to just slip back into no problem like I wouldn't have changed at all, and I just- I can't"
She squeezes her eyes shut, digging her teeth into her bottom lip as she tries to stave off the panic that's beginning to bubble up again. After a moment warmth engulfs her as her mom wraps her arms around her and begins running her fingers through her hair soothingly, "Oh, sweetheart. That's not it, that's not it at all! We all knew you'd probably at be at least a little different, how could you not? It's just that no one's exactly sure how to treat you and how to go about finding those differences without making you feel like a stranger. It's just that no one knows how to get to know who you've become since then, so they're trying to feel it out by treating you the same. It's ok if you don't quite know yourself just now, sweetheart. The thing is, discovering who you are is already part of being a teenager and I'm sure it's only made worse by the circumstances, so I promise you, it's ok, you'll figure things out in time. You'll figure out exactly who Marzanna and Hanna are and how to be both, it'll just take some time. We'll be right here with you, every step of the way, or if you need some space, we'll give you that. We don't want anything but for you to really truly come home to us, and to help you move past that which haunts you. On that note, the government has set up special counseling facilities. It's not mandatory, but if you want, I know they made sure at least some of them know about magic so those with it that got stuck in the game can speak freely..."
She lets out a shuddering, "I... I don't know. Maybe. It might help, I honestly…"
Her mom pulls away to give her a watery smile, "Well, you need to get back into shape first anyway, so why don't you spend this time thinking about it. Of course, you could always just try it for a couple of sessions, and if you don't think it's helping you don't have to keep going. Who knows though, maybe talking to someone who knows neither Marzanna or Hanna will help."
She nods slowly, then weakly cracks an admittedly bad joke, "If all else fails, I could always change my name to Marzanna Hanna Sparda."
Her mother snorts, "That's a terrible name."
She grins lightly, "Maybe, but it's no worse than Marzanna Rosemarie Sparda. Seriously woman, what were you thinking? I mean, I know it wasn't Sparda at the time, but Marzanna Rosemarie Potter and Marzanna Rosemarie Evans are just as bad. Marzanna and Rosemarie just don't work together. Honestly, my brother gets the rather normal Mike Dezi Sparda, but I get freaking Marzanna Rosemarie Sparda? What were you on?!"
Her mom laughs lightly, "Lots of pain relieving potions… and some amortentia, which probably didn't help."
She tilts her head, then shrugs, "Fair enough."
Her mother chuckles, then gives her a Look, "So… What was that about having an adoptive daughter?"
She winces, "Ah… Well, to summarize, Kirito and I came across a little girl who seemed like she couldn't have been older than nine near our home. She was way underdressed for the weather, and under equipped for a non-safe zone on that level of floor, and she passed out for seemingly no reason. When she woke up, she had amnesia, only being able to tell us her name was Yui, and seemed to have mentally regressed to that of a toddler or just a bit older, judging by her speech capacity. We quickly grew ridiculously attached to her considering how short the time she was with us was, and despite immediately being to search for a parent or guardian of some sort, as we were sure someone of her age wouldn't have been allowed to play SAO on her own, and despite knowing that once we found said parent or guardian we'd have to give her back. While we were in the Town of Beginnings looking for someone who knew her, we ended up coming across a church that a woman had gathered the child players in so as to take care of them, helped her save a few of the kids from absolute scumbags who were trying to extort them, then staying the night with them when Yui seemed to have some sort of attack and passed out. The next day we were approached by someone who'd heard high level players were in town. It turned out that the group that had been extorting the kids was from a rival faction in her guild and that the faction's leader, that asshole Kibaou in case you remember him from the disaster on the 25th floor, had tricked the actual guild leader and the leader of her faction, Thinker, into the depths of a high level dungeon without weapons or Crystals to escape with. Don't misunderstand, that's not a sign of intelligence on Kibaou's part, but a sign of sheer gullible naive idiocy on Thinker's behalf, which is ironic considering his name, but whatever. Anyway, we went to help her save Thinker and ended up taking Yui because she adamantly refused to stay behind. Right outside the safe zone Thinker had taken refuge in was a boss. Kirito and I attempted to take it on and we're doing a decent job, we'd been in tougher spots, at least in my opinion. Then right after we'd both been nailed by a nasty hit, Yui came trotting out of the safe zone and destroyed the boss in one move."
She sighs before continuing, "Come to find out she's an AI that gained true sentience, which basically means she's really alive rather than just good at faking it, and she'd just simply deleted the boss. Apparently, she'd been designed as a mental health counseling program that was just codenamed Yui, but on the day the game launched, Kayaba banned her from interacting with the players. With the confliction of what she was literally designed to do and her orders to not do it along with literally being forced to watch hundreds take there own lives by her very own programming that required her to at least monitor the players all tearing her apart, she slowly began to build up errors and glitches, eventually breaking down into what Kirito and I met. She'd had an interest in us, as two of the only players that were constantly happy, and had been watching us closely along with appearing near our house so as to watch us from a distance in person, which is why she was near our house. There was some sort of console in the room that was meant to be used as emergency in game access for the GMs, she'd bumped it, and Cardinal recognized her, finally noticed her glitches and errors, and fixed her with the automatic error correction system, which repaired her damaged memory data and language program amongst everything else. She explained everything to us, and after a bit of talking we convinced her that it didn't matter to us, she was our daughter and we loved her, AI program or not."
She slumps tiredly, even thinking about the next part still gets to her, "Then she dropped the bombshell on us. Apparently, since she used the console to delete the boss, the Cardinal system was running a check on her, would undoubtedly realize she had been going directly against orders, and delete her as a rogue program. She… She started disappearing right in front of me, from right in my arms just… disintegrating into little lights and fading away… I… I don't know what I would've done if Kirito hadn't whipped out the fact he's apparently a fucking god at hacking and managed to pull off some sort of techno wizardry on the console to isolate her program, save it as an in-game object, and implant some sort of command to download her data to his NerveGear in a matter of literally less than thirty seconds before the console blasted him away rather violently."
Her mom gains a contemplative look, "That last day, when most of the players woke up, he came stumbling in clutching his NerveGear like it was one of the most important things in his world. He actually told Kikouka that he 'wouldn't be able to pry it from his cold dead fingers', if I remember correctly. I always did wonder…"
She smiles lightly, "That sounds about right. Yui actually helped him save everyone from Alfheim too."
Her mom smiles lightly, then tilts her head, "Soooo… Does that mean I'm a grandma? I'm pretty sure that means I'm a grandma."
She tenses slightly, giving her mother a wary look, "... You're not going to start going on about how 'I'm too young to have a child' or anything like that, are you?"
Her mother plants her fists on her hips, "Marzanna Sparda! Do I look like your father to you?!"
Her lips twitch, "No. Of course not. You're way too short."
Her mother snorts, "Amongst other things. Anyway, I'm far more concerned with how I'm supposed to dote on a granddaughter I've only just heard of and have practically no way of interacting with! How am I supposed to spend time with her, to talk to her, to shower her with love, not to mention she doesn't have a physical body, so how am I supposed to give her presents?!"
Now it's her turn to snort, "Considering how excited Kazuto told me she was when she found out she had an aunt in his sister, I'm pretty sure she'd just be happy to know you accept her and that she can call you grandma."
Her mom rolls her eyes, "That's a given. You're father might throw a fit at the idea of you having a child, but even he won't deny she's family. Which puts us back to square one. How on earth is this supposed to work outside of virtual reality?"
She smiles lightly, "I wouldn't be surprised if that mad genius of mine is already working on some way for her to at least communicate with the outside world, if not outside already drawing up robotics designs, I'll be helping as soon as I can of course, though I'm not sure how yet, since I don't know much about that sort of stuff, my knowledge certainly isn't to the level we'll need for a project like this. And unless you've told him, that's without him knowing about Technomancy and the fact it can likely make all that a hell of a lot easier for us if he takes the time to learn it."
Her mom nods sharply, "You better get on that then, we'll help in anyway in we can if you guys need it."
She nods, "Thanks, but it actually shouldn't be that difficult, assuming we can figure out the Technomancy parts. Rather than building a robotic body, it'll probably be easier, and better considering current technology, to build her a magical body. A homunculus of some sort perhaps, or maybe a golem? I don't know yet, I was planning on beginning to look into it over the next few days. And of course, we'll need some sort of way for her technology based mind to interact with the magic based body, which is where the Technomancy will come in. She'll also probably need some sort of way to hop between VR games and her body seeing as she seemed to enjoy playing with us and I doubt she'll want to completely leave that world behind. I don't know much about that sort of thing, but while I'm sure just downloading her would work if she was coming to this world permanently, I'd doubt it'd be a good option to have to constantly download and re-upload her between VR and reality, and I'm not sure I could make a body that would be recognized by a VR headset… I'll need to get some more books on Technomancy as well, preferably two copies each of whatever new books I get along with additional copies of whatever I already have so I can give a set to Kazuto so he can start studying while I'm working on recovering and can do so when we aren't together even afterwards. Though he'll also need books to give him the groundwork in magical theory that he'll need to understand it. Though on second thought, I should get him copies of some of the books I have on the subject as groundwork for when he starts to learn magic anyway, seeing as I'll need my copies to start looking into the problem of Yui's actual body… Although, while I could technically do all the actual casting, a lot of this is riding on Kazuto being able to accept a half demon that has killed people as his mate…"
Her mother looks like she wants to say something more on the whole killing people subject, but she's also got a contemplative look in her eye, and after a moment she drops it, "Well, at least you've got some idea where to start. If you give me a list of books you already have, I can get Kazuto copies while I'm picking up the new material for you both."
She nods, and quickly hands her mom her long empty plate, "I'll go get that for you now, but I only have the textbooks from my Technomancy class, so you'll have to look for other books going from beginners and we'll probably end up needing up to mastery level. And don't forget, any copies you get for Kazuto have to be in Japanese, and they need charmed covers since he's from a magically unaware family. You can't forget those things. You know what, I'll just write it as a note at the top of the list."
Her mom raises an eyebrow, "I do have a rather good memory, you know that right?"
She nods, "I know, but it's simply too important to risk you forgetting."
Her mom let's out an exaggerated sigh as she hurries out of the kitchen to write the list, and she smiles. This was good. Having something to focus on was excellent. It left her with something more to do than just wallow in guilt and confusion.
Heading up to her room, she grabs a notebook and a pen before pausing. She should probably make sure Kazuto was on board for this course of action before committing them both to it. Grabbing her phone, she quickly navigates to her contacts and goes to one of the many she'd added the day before she was released. It's answered almost immediately, "Hey Marzanna."
She can't help but smile at her mate's warm voice, "Hey. Listen, I was talking to my mom and kinda sorta… mentioned that we had an adopted daughter in Yui."
She can all but feel her mate wince, "Not good. She didn't take it well I assume? I mean, we are just teenagers, and Yui is… unique."
She huffs a laugh, "If by 'didn't take it well' you mean she immediately started freaking out about how she was supposed to spoil her granddaughter rotten when said granddaughter doesn't have a physical body, then no, she took it horribly."
There's a brief pause before her mate starts laughing, "I guess I should've known better. You family is… well, let's just say they're strange."
Her smile widens, "You can say that again. Though I wouldn't have it any other way."
His tone becomes fondly amused, "I'm sure you wouldn't. They wouldn't be able to handle your particular brand of insanity very well otherwise."
She rolls her eyes, "You're just as bad as I am, and I'll have you know I'm considered quite sane by my family's standards. Anyway, we're getting off topic, my mother sort of has a point. I figure you've already got at least a few ideas for how to at least talk to Yui in the real world, right?"
Her mate hums, "I actually already made a way for Yui to talk to me through my computer with a bit of help from her, and the two of us are already working on a program that'll let us talk to her on our phones, but it'll only let us talk to her. It won't really let her experience or interact with the real world." He sighs, "Technically speaking, robotics have come quite far, so theoretically, I'd just need learn how to build a high tech robot, which in and of itself would be no easy feat, especially since I know very little about the subject, but if I could, from there it would just be a matter of having the parts and equipment capable of handling a program Yui's size. In the case of my computer, I've upgraded it to be top notch, and while it can store Yui and let her actually run, unlike the NerveGear which was only capable of holding her saved data, my computer isn't exactly small. With our phones, we're trying to figure out a way that she can just connect to them, like a call, since our phones can't handle upright holding her. For a robot though, she'd not only need that equipment and need it to be reasonably compact, but she'd also need easy mobility and be able to blend in, which just isn't possible at the current levels of technology."
She smiles, "I knew you were already working on it. Told my mom as much in fact. I may actually have a solution to the problem of her body from the magic angle, but considering I know next to nothing about technology and programming, it'd probably be much easier for you to learn some of the stuff we'll need. Actually, while I obviously can't give you a timeframe before we start working on it and figuring out exactly what problems we're going to be facing and how difficult the project would be over all, I can say that it probably isn't unreasonable to say it should be done in a couple years max. But you probably shouldn't tell Yui that part if you talk to her about it, I wouldn't want to get her hopes up in case it ends up being now complicated than I'm assuming."
Her mate sucks in a breath, "Really? That soon? That's- That's amazing! I- Wait, no. Hold on a moment."
She can just barely hear what sounds like her mate using a keyboard and mouse for a minute before a familiar yawn precedes an equally familiar voice, "Papa? What's going on?"
Her mate's voice is excited as he answers, "You're mama's on the phone, she says she might have a solution to getting you a body of some sort, we just don't know how long it'll take."
Her daughter's voice is full of childish glee and excitement, "Really?!"
She hears her mate laugh, "Really. Go on Marzanna, I've talked to Yui about magic a bit when I was telling her about the real world and you're on speaker, so you're all set."
She shakes her head lightly, then begins explaining, "Here's the thing, magic and technology don't tend to mix under natural circumstances. Magic is wild and chaotic and powerful and tends to overload technology. Up until the nineties, it was actually considered impossible to get the two to coexist harmoniously, but at the tail end of the nineties, nineteen ninety-nine to be exact, a couple methods of protecting technology from magic were discovered. From there, ways to enhance technology with magic began coming about in force, and the field of magic known as Technomancy was born. That's why I say I need your help. Seeing as I know about as much as the average person does about technology and you know a hell of a lot more, you'd probably understand it better and make better use of that knowledge than I can. I can handle creating the actual body itself, though I'll probably need to look into it more in depth to figure out which type of artificial body would be best, but you'd be in charge of figuring out how to actually get Yui into something we can put inside and what it should be, and figuring out how to get the two to meet so Yui can control her body from whatever her programming is running through would be where we'd intersect. I know you said it'd be hard to find something capable of holding and running a program her size, but she doesn't actually need to be stored there. She just needs to be able to control her body and receive data from it, like sight and hearing, all that stuff. That'll probably be easier than just storing her, right? Plus she'd be safe even if the hardware got damaged... There's also the fact that while I don't know for sure, I doubt Yui wants to give up virtual worlds completely, and I'm not sure I could create a body that could use a NerveGear or AmuSphere or anything like that."
Her daughter hums, "No, I'd prefer not. I liked playing with Papa and Mama in Aincrad, and Papa and Aunt Leafa in Alfheim."
Her mate let's out a hum of his own, "Maybe… A reverse of the NerveGear?"
Her face scrunches up in confusion, "... What?"
Her mate clears his throat, "So, the NerveGear, and AmuSphere for that matter, works by basically cutting off or dampening the signals your brain receives from your body, then sends it about whatever virtual world you're in, right? What you're basically saying is that we need that in reverse. Something that'll cut off the flow of data that Yui is getting from virtual reality and replacing it with data from her body in the real world, right?"
She smiles, "Yea, basically."
He hums again, "That… should actually be a lot easier than what I was thinking about. Not that it'll actually be easy, mind you, you are basically asking me to replicate top of the market tech in reverse while simultaneously changing it so that rather than electrical impulses that simulate the impulses between your brain and body it'll use the sort of raw data Yui uses to process the world, but it should still be easier than the alternative I was thinking of. Especially since Yui should be able to help out a lot more, she understands how the data she uses to process the world actually works better than anyone after all. Of course, you've still got the issue of the actual body itself to figure out, and we still have to work out how to translate whatever sensory data the body registers into the sort of data Yui can actually use, along with how to translate whatever data Yui sends to the body to move into something the body can actually make use of, but… It's a start, and it's already more progress than I've made trying to figure it out. There is the issue of me actually needing Technomancy textbooks, and the fact I won't be able to cast any spells I might need for that…"
She nods, then remembers he can't see that, "Right, but my mom's already said she can go pick up any books we'll need. You'll also probably need to study magical theory as well to understand the Technomancy to begin with, maybe not the beginner levels of it, but the higher levels for sure. My mom can get them, and considering it's the magic world, it should be rather easy for her to get them in Japanese and with charmed covers so no other non-magicals realize what they are, Statute of Secrecy and all that. And she can also drop them off at your place so you can get started, I just need your address, I've already got a piece of paper, so anytime you ready."
He quickly gives her his address, and she carefully writes it down, double checking that she got it right before continuing, "Alright, I've actually got a good selection on magical theory books already, but I can't loan them to you, partially because they're in English, and partially because I'm going to need to brush up on it both for looking into the problem of Yui's body and because I've got to do revision so I can sit my OWLs and NEWTs for it and drop it."
There's a brief pause, "That's fine, but… What on earth do you mean by 'sit your OWLs and NEWTs for it'? Are those tests? Weird name if they are…"
She laughs, "They are. The magical world doesn't break it's schooling up like the mundane one does. Generally speaking, in the magical world you attend a purely non-magic school until your eleven. From there you enter a school that's primarily magic, but almost all of them teach some amount of non-magical subjects. For the first five years of magical education, you're studying the required core subjects and a few electives to get to OWL level, OWL being an acronym for Ordinary Wizarding Level. Once you've passed those, you choose which classes to continue based on what profession you're looking to pursue, and study for two more years to take your NEWTs, which has the terrible actual name of Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Test but is nonetheless the official name of the tests. Since I was fourteen when we got trapped, I was a year away from taking my OWLs, and I'm now supposed to be a year away from taking my NEWTs. So I need to catch up on both my magical and non-magical classes. Thankfully, I was rather far ahead of m+y peers in my magical classes due to being tutored by my family for years, so with a bit of revision, I should be able to take all my OWLs and at the very least pass, even if not with the grades I would've originally had. From there I can drop quite a few classes, and for some of my better subjects, I should be able to even sit my NEWTs. If all goes well, I should only have three magical classes to attend and get caught up to NEWT level on."
There's a brief pause, "Even if it does end up only being three more, I still do not envy you having any additional classes to have to catch up on."
She sighs, "Yea, tell me about it. It shouldn't be to hard to catch up though. As long as I do as well as I'm hoping on my tests, I should just be left with Defensive magic, Warding, and Technomancy, but anything I fail will have to be added to my classes…"
She can practically feel him shudder, "Good luck with that. It sounds like you're going to need it."
She rolls her eyes, "Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence there."
He sighs, "It's not that I don't think you can do it, it's just that it's going to be a freaking nightmare to catch up on everything, especially since they'll likely be pushing us to do it at fast as possible, and to add even more classes to that… Yea, no thanks."
She groans, "Trust me, I'm the last person you need to point that out to. I wouldn't be surprised if I had the heaviest course load out of all the magicals that got trapped in Aincrad, so the more tests I can pass now, the better off I'll be…"
He hums in agreement, and there's a few moments of silence before he speaks up again, "Hey… Do you think it'd be alright if I got a scanner and put that stuff on my computer? Yui might be a huge help if she knows the theory as well, and I've got pretty damn good security on my computer, but if anyone happens to hack it and get access to that stuff… There's the whole Statute of Secrecy business…"
She snorts, "Of course. There's a bit of hardware you can buy from almost any Technomancy company that'll allow it to create magical firewall on your computer. It's literally impossible to break through. Honestly, the only reason there's no digital library for the magical world is because there are far too many publishers and self publishers that won't allow their stuff to be put there to make it really mean anything. And the only reason I haven't done it is because by the time I found out it would've been a colossal bitch to scan everything, and both my personal and family's libraries have only grown since then. Technically, it'd probably be totally worth it in the end if I just got around to doing it, but…"
He sorts, "Even if it's a huge hassle, you should still do it… But anyway, as long as it's ok then I'll probably buy a scanner… Assuming I can find one that's cheap enough anyway. And you should stop putting it off before the libraries got any larger."
She sighs, "I know, I know. It's just going to be such a pain. Anyway, I should probably go. I've gotta go through my library a bit to find which books I already have that'll help in this project, write a list for my mom so she can get you copies and get both of us books to fill in the gaps that our libraries here undoubtedly have. She'll probably be by in a couple hours."
He hums, "Alright, I'll talk to you later then."
Yui pipes up from the background, "Bye Mama!"
She smiles, "I'll talk to you guys later."
Hanging up, she grabs her notebook and pen again, then heads off. Hopefully, giving Yui a body wouldn't be too difficult, but even if it was, she wouldn't stop until she'd done it. Her little girl deserved to have a chance to meet and live with the rest of her family after all.