While all these dramatic events were unfolding, Pakku sat on the floor of the archives calmly reading about twospirits. The archivist sat in a chair at his desk nearby. Pakku started with the fire-water twospirits, naturally. Then he moved on to earth-air twospirits. The archives did not have many records of twospirits. There was only one twospirit every 200 years, after all. The 800 year old one whose name had been lost was the oldest. There was only one box of records about them, and the records only took up an entire box because there were multiple skins dedicated to the early life, training and deeds of each person. Pakku read through them as if he was reading short stories.
When he finished, he put them back in the box. "Did you find anything helpful?" the archivist asked.
"One of the earth-air twospirits faced resistance," Pakku said, surprised. "His community tried to make him stay and follow in the old traditions. It says here that a tornado came down, picked him up, and carried him to the nearest air temple."
"The spirits will help you!" The archivist clapped delightedly. "I told you, Pakku: You can always find a story from the past that explains the present."
"It's not the same situation at all," Pakku replied. "The new one can't summon a wave to carry him away. He has to stay here."
"It is the same," the archivist argued. "The last one struggled the same way, and his spirits came to help him. The spirits of the elements are powerful. They can do anything. With spirits on your side, you have nothing to worry about."
Pakku sighed. "The spirit of air did not change its entire state of existence to help him out. They don't do that. Twospirits have powerful spiritbending abilities even before they are trained; he made the tornado himself because he wanted to leave."
The archivist clasped his hands on top of his walking stick. "I used to think so, too. But after going over all those stories and all the ones we have about spirits and spiritbending, I don't think so anymore. It seems too complicated. Could any person really do something that extraordinary, without hurting anyone or damaging anything, with no training, because of reasons they don't know anything about yet? The simplest explanation is the most likely one, and I think the simplest explanation is that the spirits did it."
"We'll have to agree to disagree," Pakku replied. "I see no reason why the creators of the world should bend themselves backward to personally assist a single human. That would be like me circling the city in order to avoid inconveniencing a polar snail. Impossible."
The archivist shrugged. "May I ask for a favor?"
"Of course."
"I would like to meet this new twospirit. I think I will take a lunch break tomorrow and get out of here, go see the city. It has been a while."
Pakku stood and helped the archivist to do likewise. "I can ask his uncle to bring him." Pakku kept to himself the fact that he had no idea how he would convince Zuko to actually listen to his uncle for once, the fact that racing around to all these different places to arrange things with different people would make his morning a madhouse, and that he might have to cancel his morning class with no explanation just to make it possible. The archivist would feel bad for asking, and Pakku wouldn't inflict that on a treasured friend.
"This would make two boats from one tree," he added. "His uncle is the former initiate I told you about."
The archivist clapped his hands like a child. "Oh, wonderful!"
.
The next day, Aang woke up feeling better than he had in a while. His body was adjusting to the new schedule. His mood was high and he was filled with hope. As he remembered that he had been kicked out of Master Pakku's class, the memory made him sad…but then he thought of something he could try.
He woke up Katara. She looked at the mirrors and sat up. "I have an idea," Aang told her as she brushed her hair. "I'm going to take Appa and go on a spiritual retreat. By tonight, I'll be a new man."
"That sounds great, Aang." Katara lowered her brush. "Getting out of here could be just what you need." She opened up their newly-purchased supply of dried meats, ate some as her breakfast and helped Aang pack the rest. She filled a canteen of water for him. "Good luck."
"You too. When I get back, you can teach me a new waterbending move." They laughed together. With a friendly wave, she departed. Aang woke up Momo and told him of the plan. Sokka was still snoring, so Aang wrote him a note and asked Momo to make sure he saw it. Then he left.
Appa was being fed breakfast. His fur was soft and orderly, his feet cleaned, his chewing utterly content. He was being treated like a king. "Hey, buddy," Aang said. To the person feeding Appa, he said, "I'm gonna take him out for a flight today. Is that okay?"
"Of course, Avatar." The person bowed to him and left. Aang used his airbending to feed Appa what little remained and located the saddle. Appa grumbled a little bit but showed no resistance to being saddled.
"Oh, yeah!" Aang exclaimed as they flew up and out of the city. The open air! How he had missed it! He guided Appa out over the sea wall, then followed the coastline. Appa flew swiftly and roared with enjoyment. They flew for perhaps half an hour under the moonlight before Aang spotted an iceberg. It was recently calved, the top of it jutting up into a jagged peak that had yet to be rounded off. It was perfect. "Alright, buddy. I'll sit on top of that iceberg and meditate. You can relax on the ice over there." Aang spread his glider and leaped off Appa's head. He flew to the peak of the iceberg, found a spot that wasn't too sharp, and sat down in lotus position. He put his fists together and closed his eyes.
"What bothers you, Aang?" He opened his eyes to find Avatar Roku sitting beside him, partially hovering in midair.
"My anger," Aang told him. "How do I let go of it?"
"Do not let go of your anger. When it comes to someone who is normally calm, it's there for a reason. Listen to what it has to say."
"How do I listen to my anger?"
Avatar Roku smiled gently. "Anger is a convenient disguise for many other things. I don't believe you're really angry, Aang. What are you really?" After asking, he disappeared.
Aang closed his eyes and woke up in his own body. He sure felt angry. He wanted to punch Zuko in the face. If that wasn't anger, what was it?
He blushed. His suspicions still felt embarrassing. But on a spiritual retreat, alone, there was nobody to laugh at him. He could think whatever he wanted. Leaving the city was a very good idea.
.
That same morning, Zuko was awake to see the moonrise. He watched it climb high in the sky and spread its rays over the top of the glacier. He yawned. The water dragon at his side flapped its fins in excitement. They were above the exit of the seal-hunters' tunnel, on the peak of that hill. Zuko had been sitting there for nearly an hour already.
He looked at the clouds that were amassing some distance away. A storm was brewing. It darkened the sky in the direction the trail of flags led off to. "I should go back and have breakfast," he muttered. He didn't really want to, though. Uncle's going to be so worried about me. He's going to ask me why I woke up screaming in the middle of the night and ran out, and I won't be able to answer him. I can't tell him about The Nightmare. Zuko shivered. Remembering his near death experience had made The Nightmare ten times worse. This time, he had woken into a full-fledged panic attack. If it happens again, I'm doomed. He expected it to happen again. In his experience, once a nightmare started it never stopped.
The water spirit tapped him on the shoulder. He looked up. Don't worry, it told him. You will be fine.
"He's going to ask me questions."
That's fine.
"He's going to get even more angry with me for not answering them."
Tell him the truth.
"I can't."
Yes you can. Tell him you're too scared to talk about it.
"Oh. That truth. I guess I can manage that." Zuko stood up. Without him needing to tell it to, the water dragon turned its form to liquid water, then to snow, and blew away.
As he walked down the hill, he checked with his insides. He'd used his early awakening to start training early. By now, he felt much like he normally did by lunchtime. If he didn't succumb to the urge to nap, he might be able to squeeze three training sessions into the day. But the farther he walked, the more he doubted his ability to resist. By the time he entered the city, he felt near to collapse. The first thing he did was yawn and rub his eyes. Maybe a short nap. He stumbled up to the first canal he had to cross, and stopped. He checked to make sure nobody else was trying to use it, focused, and gripped it. He held the water firm and steady as he walked across. One down, two to go.
He entered the house and found Kalika already there. Iroh was telling her how they had rescued Aunt Wu's town from the volcano. The conversation broke off as soon as Zuko entered. "Nephew!" Iroh said, smiling. "I was just telling her how you used your wisdom to save a small town. Join us." He held up a cup of tea.
Zuko joined them. He fell to his knees with a thump. "I've been awake for the past several hours. All I want to do is eat and sleep." He took a cup of tea and drained half of it in one go. When he lowered the cup, he had to close his eyes. The room seemed to be rotating.
"Why have you been awake for so long already?" Kalika asked.
"A nightmare."
Iroh sipped his tea. "Would you like to tell her about it, Nephew?"
Zuko sighed. "Hand me a bowl and let's go upstairs." Kalika took the bowl from him and carried it herself, which he didn't have the energy to protest. He kept a hand on the railing as they went up the steps.
Upstairs, he sat down and leaned back against the wall like usual. "You know the near death experience I had? That. I woke up in a panic and ran away. I decided as long as I was out, I might as well train."
"You had some kind of conscious experience?" she asked.
"Don't most people?"
"You seemed like you were totally under. I thought you had no memory of it." She wrote something down on the blank scroll she had pulled out. "I'll save that for another time. You're clearly not up for a long talk."
She's right. I'm not. But she prepared a whole scroll for me. Zuko yawned. "I can tell you about my nightmares."
"By all means."
"I have…" It took some time for him to mentally count. The Nightmare, the ants, being burned. Waiting for father, I guess. "Um… Four recurring nightmares."
Kalika wrote that down. "Can you tell me more about them?"
"The one I had tonight, I call, 'The Nightmare.' It's the worst of them. It's usually rare, but lately I've been having it more and more often. It always woke me up, but now that I had that experience, it's stronger."
He waited for Kalika to write that down before continuing. "Another one I've been having a lot is this nightmare about something terrible that I saw recently. A week or two ago. It's not strong enough to wake me up every time, but it feels awful." Another wait. "Then there's the nightmare about the day my father banished me. It doesn't wake me up either, and it doesn't feel as bad as the others. I don't have it very often anymore." He waited. "The last one isn't connected to a specific event. It's just a recurring theme. I have nightmares about doing something that goes wrong, or I can't quite manage to do it, and I'm afraid of what my father will say when he finds out. This one's the most common. Practically every other dream."
"Has your father come home and expressed disappointment in the past?" Kalika asked. He nodded. "So all of these recurring nightmares are replays of negative events that have happened to you in the past?"
"Yeah." Zuko yawned.
Kalika looked at him strangely. "You don't seem to find that unusual."
"It's not. All nightmares are like that."
"In my experience, most people have nightmares that are just as random and bizarre as other dreams. Replaying an event exactly as if it was happening to you again is not normal."
Zuko shrugged. "So there are multiple types of nightmares."
"How long have you been having nightmares that were exact or near exact replays of real events?"
"As long as I can remember."
Kalika maintained her composure as she wrote this down, but he could tell by a slight facial expression that she was worried. She lowered the charcoal and hesitated before asking her next question. "You said The Nightmare got stronger after you nearly died, not that it started. And it is connected to the idea of nearly dying. Lee… Have you had a near death experience before?"
His pulse shot up. Zuko felt a sudden need to make sure nobody was around, lurking, spying. He looked all around the room in short, sharp movements. After checking the room, he grew dizzy and realized he was hyperventilating. "I don't know. I don't…" He shook his head. "I don't know if it's just a nightmare or not. It is weird that it's always the same. But I don't remember if it really happened. In the thing that happens in it, the space is so small that I would have had to be a really young kid."
Kalika reached out to hold his hand, slowly, carefully. She said nothing. He gradually stopped hyperventilating. "I'm sorry you went through all that," she said softly.
He swallowed. "Ugh. I don't feel great. I need to sleep." He picked up his breakfast and began to shove it into his face. Kalika wrote on her scroll and prepared it for storage in the meantime. When he was done, she propped him up as they went down the stairs.
Zuko collapsed onto his bed and went to sleep instantly. The water spirit was right. He'd forgotten that Kalika would be around; with her, he was safe. Coming back to the city was a very good idea.
.
"Maika! Maika!" called the young woman as she ran up to her best friend. "I just saw something incredible!"
Maika gripped her son's hand tighter so he wouldn't wander away and turned to face her with a sigh. "For the last time, he's just a skilled waterbender. He was walking on ice."
"No, he wasn't! And this time I have proof!" The young woman began to explain in short, sharp gestures. "I woke up early to watch for him, and it's a good thing I did, because he came back from the tunnel barely after dawn! This time, he was super tired! He stepped on the water and it gave way beneath his feet, like this." She dipped the sole of her foot barely an inch into the canal to demonstrate. "And then he fell forward and caught himself on his hands, like this." She got down on all fours, oblivious to the people watching her antics and whispering. "I saw the water ripple beneath him and splash away from his hands! That proves it! He was not walking on ice."
The people nearby whispered louder. Maika looked troubled. "You saw a splash?"
"Yes! I saw little flying droplets shining in the moonlight with my own eyes. Now do you believe me?"
"Who's this?" Maika's son asked.
The young woman told him, "He must be one of the people the Avatar brought. He has a big scar over his left eye."
"Woah. And he walks on plain water like it's nothing?" The boy's eyes widened until they looked ready to pop out of his head. "He must be a super duper ultra powerful waterbender, better than Master Pakku!" The boy looked around and pointed suddenly. "There's my friend from class! I've gotta tell him!" He ran away from his mother.
Maika punched her friend in the shoulder. "Look what you've done! Now he's going to spend all day gossiping with his friends instead of helping me with chores!"
"Ow! Sorry."
.
"What did you do?" Iroh asked in a loud whisper.
Kalika smiled proudly. "It was simple. The essence of simplicity itself. So simple, it looped right back around to being insanely complex. The inspiration must have been sent by a helpful spirit."
"But what was it?" Iroh pleaded with every fiber in his body for her to tell him what fabulous secret she had stumbled upon. How had she earned Zuko's trust? He had to know!
"Okay, okay," Kalika said with a laugh. "It all sprang from the idea of respect."
"Respect?"
"Yes. I had to show him that I respected him. So I decided to -"
The doorway rustled. She cut herself off midsentence and turned to face the visitor. Iroh did likewise, shooting whoever it might be a glare of light annoyance. When he saw who the visitor was, his expression changed to one of great surprise. Master Pakku had come to visit him.
"Am I interrupting anything?" Pakku asked.
"No, please, come in," Iroh said. To Kalika, he said, "I asked him to help me with my nephew."
Pakku did not sit. "Kalika, it would be best if we could talk privately."
"Oh." She got to her feet quickly. "I'll be off, then. See you at dinnertime." She went through the doorway and was gone.
Pakku glanced over at where Zuko lay in his bed. Zuko's light snoring indicated that he was fully asleep. Pakku sat down. "Do you remember that information I brought to you when you were initiated?"
"I remember," Iroh replied.
"I got it from the archivist. He's the oldest person in the whole tribe, and the most educated. If anyone can help you and your nephew with your spirit problems, he can."
Iroh sat up. "That's great news! Can he meet us today? I have this little diner I like to spend time in…" He told Pakku where it was. Pakku nodded, indicating he knew the place.
"Lunchtime today," Pakku said. Iroh nodded. "Will you have trouble convincing him to come?"
Iroh shook his head. "Not today. He'll sleep the morning away and wake up just in time to go. I'll tell him I've found someone who can help him. He will come."
"That makes my life easier." Pakku rose to his feet and stretched, but did not leave. He glanced at Zuko again. "It nearly balances out the risks I took to come here."
Iroh rose to his feet. "What risks?"
"There are people in this city who suspect that you and your nephew are firebender spies," Pakku told him, looking even grimmer than usual. "They have you under observation. Both of you need to be very careful and keep a low profile."
Iroh did not like the sound of that. Coming under suspicion just as Zuko was getting temperamental and prone to acting out of control? Talk about bad timing! "You should do the same," Iroh replied. "Why didn't you send a student of yours with a letter?"
"Because that would have been traced back to me anyway, it would have seemed strange that I did not give my message to you personally, and I don't want word of this meeting to get spread all over town by curious children. They make unreliable messengers."
Iroh thought quickly. "If anyone asks, you were just fulfilling my request to find someone who could help us with the water spirit."
Pakku turned and waved over his shoulder. "See you at lunch."
.
A/N: While rewatching canon as part of my research, I was saddened by the several scenes where Katara walks on water. It's not as special an ability as I thought it was. But in those scenes, she runs across very quickly, basically hopping. Walking steadily would still be unusual. And falling onto the water unexpectedly, catching yourself on it? There's no evidence any waterbender was capable of that in canon. I can still use this.