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Part 10

(In which Yato dares to dream of a future.)

"So… You had dinner at Bishamon's yesterday, right?" Hiyori eyed Yukine curiously as they filed down the street in the direction of the ice cream shop. "How was it? Did you have a good time?"

Yukine darted a sidelong look at Yato, but Yato was too preoccupied to pay much mind. He had woken feeling strange again, maybe a carryover of some forgotten dream. He had not been convinced he was invisible this time—everyone's morning greetings would make sure of it even if he had his doubts—but he felt a little off. A little hazy and distracted and numbed down and too-light, as if he didn't quite fit into his body and might reasonably expect to phase through any wall he approached. Not that he'd walk into a wall. He liked to think he was past that phase now, and Yukine would have kittens if he tried it again.

His friends had done everything right to make him feel present and he'd done his due diligence tasting breakfast and digging his fingernails into his palms and running his fingers along every wall he passed to remind himself that he was indeed corporeal, but he just couldn't shake the feeling.

"It was fine, I guess," Yukine mumbled.

"Fine?" Hiyori echoed. "I'm sure Yato wouldn't mind if you had a good time." When no response was forthcoming, she added, "Would you, Yato?"

"Huh?" Yato started at the sound of his name and mentally played back the conversation. "No, of course not. I'm the one who said he should go. He should have a good time."

He leaned in towards a woman hurrying by in the opposite direction, pulled in by some unseen magnetism, and his fingertips grazed the slippery plastic of the shopping back in her hand. When he realized the kids were watching him, he angled himself inward towards them again.

"…Right," Hiyori said. "So…you had a good time?"

Yato skimmed his fingers around the cool metal pole of a lamppost and kicked a pebble with the toe of his boot. The pebble skittered down the sidewalk, and he nudged it along again when they overtook it. He was perfectly capable of interacting with the physical world. He wasn't sure why the strange weightless feeling persisted.

"Yato! Hello?"

Yato started in surprise as Hiyori waved a hand in his face. "What?"

"Someone's zoned out," Yukine muttered. He gave Yato a wary look. "You've been awfully quiet again today…"

"Oh. Sorry." Yato smiled and tried to seem less distant. "I wasn't paying attention."

Hiyori shook her head at him. "I said maybe you should think about going with Yukine to one of his dinners with Bishamon."

"Ew." Yato pulled a face. "Why would I want to hang out with that dumb bimbo?"

Yukine rolled his eyes. "You two fight like an old married couple."

"Excuse me?" Yato asked indignantly. "I can guarantee there is no romantic tension there. We just happen to share custody of the same brat."

"An old divorced couple, then."

"You've gone and come up with some very strange ideas is all I can say."

Hiyori laughed. "You're all ridiculous. But she's been helping you out, and since you do 'share custody' of Yukine, maybe it wouldn't hurt to join their get-togethers every once in a while."

"Sounds like a lot of unnecessary drama to me."

Yukine snorted. "You told me that I needed to spend time with her."

Yato tilted his head and regarded him curiously. "Do you want me to be there?"

Yukine looked away. "'Want' is a strong word."

"Oh. Okay. I guess it wouldn't kill me to try it once."

"That's the spirit!" Hiyori said brightly. "She hasn't tried to kill you in ages."

"She's still a raging bitch, though," Yato muttered under his breath, but without any heat. Bishamon was a real piece of work, but they owed her a lot and he supposed she was okay.

"What was that?" Hiyori asked pointedly.

"I said I won't try to kill her either as long as–"

Yato yelped as he ran face-first into the next lamppost. He pressed his hand to his nose, his heart sinking. For just a moment, despite all his efforts, the path in front of him had looked perfectly clear, like nothing could get in his way.

"Are you okay?" Hiyori asked. "That looked like a nasty…" She trailed off at the look on his face. "Yato… Did you just try to walk through a pole?"

"Of course not," he said, but his smile felt like plastic melting in the sun. "I wasn't looking where I was going."

"You were looking right at it." Yukine did not sound amused. He narrowed his eyes and pressed his lips into a tight, bloodless line. "If you're hiding things again…"

"I'm fine. Just clumsy."

Yukine and Hiyori exchanged a look. Yato didn't like the sheen of concern glossing their eyes.

"If you're upset–" Hiyori started.

"I'm not. Just been feeling a little off. I'm not about to have a meltdown."

"Yato…" Hiyori took his hands in hers and searched his face with wide, earnest eyes. "We didn't understand before, what had happened or what you felt. We didn't understand because you didn't tell us. Please talk to us. We want to know how to help."

Yato's puzzled gaze flicked between her and Yukine. "How to help?" he repeated. "But you already do everything. You are keeping me alive with your shrines and memories. Yukine is fighting for my future and dreaming up schemes to win me believers, and you've both stuck with me every step of the way. Everyone has been doing their best, and I see all the small kindnesses. You have helped me with everything, and that is enough. You're already doing more than enough."

"But–"

He squeezed her hands tight. "More than enough," he repeated. "It's okay. It's just a feeling. It will pass soon enough."

"Isn't there anything we can do, though?" Yukine asked, scuffing his shoe against the ground. "Like, something we can do right now. To take your mind off it."

Yato tamped down any lingering traces of unease and smiled. "We're going to get ice cream! That's fun. Let's get a scoop of everything this time and see who can eat the most before it melts everywhere!"

Yukine groaned. "What a child."

Yato gently disentangled his hands from Hiyori's and started back down the sidewalk. "Come on. It'll be fun!"

Footsteps pattered along the pavement behind him, and Hiyori fell into step at his side. She slipped her hand back into his. He looked at her, and she smiled a little sadly.

"You've been touching everything again," she said. "I should have realized."

Yukine grabbed his other hand. Yato gave him a perplexed look, but he looked steadfastly away.

"You'd better talk to us about it eventually," he grumbled. "When you're ready."

Yato did not think he would ever be ready for that conversation. He had never been any good at sharing his past or thoughts or ugly emotions at even the best of times, and he wouldn't know where to start with the horrifying alternate reality he had endured. But it was nice to know that someone would be there to listen if he ever did find the words or change his mind. That someone cared enough.

Yato held on to Hiyori and Yukine tightly, letting them ground him to reality. He felt safer here between them. More real. They had always brought out the best in him.

"Let's get ice cream," he said. "I bet I can out-eat the both of you."

"Sounds expensive," Hiyori sighed.

"What an idiot," Yukine muttered.

But they didn't let go, and neither did Yato. And it was enough.

"I'm going to be sick," Hiyori moaned. She dumped the remains of her oversize ice cream cone in the trash can beside the bench they'd claimed in the park. "And you two are disgusting."

"It's okay!" Yato said around a mouth full of ice cream. Melted ice cream slid down his chin and dripped over his lap and down his arm. "It's laundry day anyway."

"I want to die, but I also don't want to let you win," Yukine muttered as he attacked his cone with renewed vigor.

Yato snorted and picked up the pace. He had far more experience scarfing down copious amounts of food than Yukine. No one was going to beat him in an eating competition.

They were down to the final stretch, crunching cones vigorously, when they were interrupted by a boy running up to them.

"Yatogami!" The boy whipped out his phone and flicked through his photos before displaying one. "Look, I got Ue-sama a companion, and so far he hasn't run away since. Maybe he was just looking for a friend."

"Uh…" Yato stared at the boy in bemusement, and then at the photo of Ue-sama curled around a much more attractive calico feline. "What's her name?"

"Ane-sama," the boy said proudly. "Isn't she great?"

"Uh… I guess? Bishamon would love to hear that one."

The boy jammed his phone back into his pocket. "Anyway," he said, "I just spotted you over here and thought I'd give you an update. Thanks for finding Ue-sama last time. I'll be sure to call you if he runs off again."

He waved and swanned off blithely, entirely unaware of everyone gaping after him.

Hiyori found her voice first. "Did…? Did that boy recognize you?"

"Cat boy?" Yato marveled. "Cat boy is my first new believer?" And then, as the significance hit him like a ton of bricks: "I have a new believer?"

Somehow, despite all Yukine's stubborn scheming and Hiyori's tenacious hope, Yato had never truly been able to fathom that he might actually win proper believers. It had always seemed too far out of his grasp. And if he had expected them, Ue-sama's young master would not have been the one he first set his sights on.

There was no guarantee of how stable this new believer's belief might be, but he did believe, at least for now. And only from a silly job hunting down escaped cats. Might there be other believers too, that he didn't know about yet? Or if not, might there be more in the future?

For the first time since his return, he felt the possibilities of a future unfolding before him. He felt hope.

"I'm so happy for you," Hiyori said, her eyes filling with tears.

"Well, isn't that something?" Yato asked slowly, still stunned. "Look at that, Yukine. It looks like all your hard work is finally paying off."

Yukine mumbled something unintelligible.

"What was that?" Hiyori asked.

Yato looked over just as Yukine took a big swallow.

"I win," Yukine said.

Yato stared at him, and then noticed the missing ice cream cone. "You little cheat," he said fondly, popping the last of his own cone into his mouth and crunching it down.

"Oh, Yukine," Hiyori sighed in exasperation. "Don't you have anything else to say?"

Yukine looked away. "Congratulations," he muttered. "You did good."

Yato smiled, and his heart fluttered, brightening with possibility. He wasn't out of the woods just yet, but he could almost taste the future on his tongue. It tasted sweet.

Ice cream-sticky fingers slipped into his hands, and he held them tight. No matter what else, no matter what tomorrow might bring, this was happiness right here. No matter what, they would be his future for as long as he held on to them.

And it was more than enough.