Firestar: Oh look! The movie Phantom of the Opera just came out. Let's go see it.
Iceheart: Okay! Let's get this show on the road. You can share my popcorn mice with me.
Sandstorm: Hey! He's mine. Back off Icekit.
Iceheart: The name is Iceheart, not kit.
Firestar: Hey, we're at the movies. Let's go find some seats.
Sandstorm: I've never seen so many Two-Legs in one place at a time.
Iceheart: I have!
Firestar: Hey! Do any of you ladies want to buy me some popcorn mice?
Sandstorm and Iceheart: I will!
Sandstorm: No, I will!
Iceheart: Okay, fine. I'm going to buy the water!
Sandstorm: No you aren't! You can buy the popcorn mice!
Iceheart: No, that's okay. Well...if you insist.
Later
Sandstorm: Wow! The popcorn mice cost $5 a mouse, and I got 10 of them.
Iceheart: I only had to spend $.50.
Sandstorm: Hey, that's not fair.
Firestar: Do any of you want to give me a foot rub?
Sandstorm: Sure I will!
Iceheart: And you can do my feet too while I share popcorn mice with Firestar!
Sandstorm: Not fair!
Iceheart: Shh. The movie's starting.
After the movie, back in ThunderClan camp
Sandstorm: That movie was great!
Iceheart: Yeah, especially when the cat came in and rubbed against the Phantom's legs!
Firestar: Yeah, I think that was the best part, considering it's a Two-Leg movie.
Iceheart: Hey I know! Let's act this out. I call Christine! Firestar, you can be the Phantom, and you're supposed to fall in love with me - for real!
Sandstorm: Hey, wait a minute! Firestar's my mate, so I should play Christine.
Firestar: No, I think Iceheart would make a better Christine than you.
Sandstorm: Hey, you're supposed to be on my side!
Firestar: Sorry. You want me to lie?
Sandstorm: Well, who am I supposed to be?
Iceheart: You can be Carlotta! That way, we can hate each other for real! Oh oh, and Firestar can hate you too because in the movie, the Phantom hates Carlotta!
Sandstorm: Okay, great idea - hey, wait!
Later
Firestar: Okay Darkstripe, you can play Ubaldo Piangi!
Darkstripe: Who's he?
Firestar: Just a minor character in the movie.
Darkstripe: Hey, I want to be a major character!
Firestar: Well, in the movie, he dies, and the the Phantom doesn't like him, so I can't like you. Oh, and you and Sandstorm can go out together! She's playing Carlotta.
Darkstripe: Okay.
At the ShadowClan camp
Firestar: Hey Tigerstar! You can play Joseph Buquet!
Tigerstar: Does he get to kill people?
Firestar: Um, yeah, sure. Let's go with that.
Tigerstar: So, when are rehearsals?
Firestar: Soon, at ThunderClan camp.
Tigerstar: Hey, why can't it be here?
Firestar: Because I thought of it.
Tigerstar: That's good enough for me.
Back at ThunderClan camp
Firestar: Cloudpelt, you can play Raoul.
Cloudpelt: What's he do?
Firestar: He's very, very rich, and vain.
Cloudpelt: Hey, that describes me! Can Mom be in it? She can be my mother.
Firestar: I thought she already was your mother.
Cloudpelt: I thought that too.
Firestar: Okay. See you at rehearsals tomorrow.
At RiverClan camp
Firestar: Silverstream, do you want to be in our Phantom of the Opera play? We're presenting it next Gathering.
Silverstream: Um, sure. What do I play?
Firestar: You play Mademoiselle Giry, the ballet mistress.
Silverstream: Um, cool. Is Graystripe in it?
Firestar: Yeah, he's Andre.
Silverstream: Okay then.
Back at ThunderClan camp (again)
Firestar: Graystripe, you're playing Andre, one of the managers.
Graystripe: Okay. Is Silverstream in it?
Firestar: Yeah, she is.
Graystripe: Is she playing a hot babe? Can I marry her?
Firestar: She's playing Mademoiselle Giry, the ballet mistress. She doesn't like anybody in the movie.
Graystripe: Aw man.
Tomorrow
Firestar: Okay everbody, start practicing.
Iceheart: Um, we don't have any lines.
Firestar: Well say them from the movie.
Iceheart: But you, me and Sandstorm were the only ones who saw it.
Firestar: Well then, teach it to them.
Iceheart: But I can't remember them.
Firestar: Ask Sandstorm.
Iceheart: She probably won't remember them either.
Firestar: Ask me.
Iceheart: Okay. Firestar, do you remember the lines from Phantom of the Opera.
Firestar: Nope.
Iceheart: Great. That was a waste of time.
Next Gathering
Firestar: And now, I would like to introduce you to my cast. Sandstorm is playing Carlotta. Iceheart is playing Christine. Graystripe is playing Andre. Silverstream is playing Mademoiselle Giry. Cloudpelt is playing Raoul. Tigerstar is playing Joseph Buquet. Darkstripe is playing Piangi. And I'm playing the handsome and popular Phantom.
Other cats: Um, yeah, sounds good.
Firestar: And here they are.
Play
Firestar: I love Christine. I want to marry her.
Iceheart: Oh, how sweet.
Firestar: You weren't supposed to hear that.
Tigerstar: Hey, I want to kill him! (Points at Cloupelt, who is admiring himself in a puddle.)
Firestar: Not now. Get back on track.
Silverstream: Christine, you're on.
Iceheart: On what?
Silverstream: It's your turn.
Iceheart: For what?
Silverstream: For performing on stage.
Iceheart: What am I performing?
Silverstream: StarClan, help me. (Walks away)
Iceheart: What did I do?
Cloudpelt: Carlotta, where are you?
Sandstorm: Right here.
Cloudpelt: Right where?
Silverstream: If you would get your face out of that reflection, you'd see.
Cloupelt: But I was just getting ready to ask me out.
Graystripe: Silverstream, will you marry me?
Iceheart: This isn't part of the play. Andre doesn't marry Mademoiselle Giry.
Graystripe: Oh, oops. We can redo it.
Firestar: Christine, will you marry me?
Iceheart: Sure!
Firestar: Cool! Okay, play's over. How'd we do?
Tallstar: Um, great. Yeah, just great.
Crookedstar: Best I ever saw.
Tigerstar: I was the best in the show wasn't I?
Graystripe: No.
Tigerstar: You want to take that back?
Graystripe: No, not really. Come on Silverstream, lets go.
Everybody leaves.
Back at ThunderClan camp
Firestar: So, how was I? Did I look good?
Graystripe: StarClan help me!
The End