SEVEN PILLARS OF WISDOM LIGHT THE STAR 2
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
...III...
ANNOUNCEMENT!
I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!
SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!
The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.
...responses...
...III...
'This will end poorly, I know it.' Thought Buff Frog to himself as he brought his 'guests' through the monster village. He was thankful they at least listened to his advice about going disguised as monsters- Star and Marco were currently disguised as WOOLETT-like creatures -Having the HEIR to the Butterfly throne here would only cause panic...not to mention if word got back to Toffee...
Buff Frog shuddered, 'Best not to think about it...'
Star would've liked to say that she agreed to the disguise for tactical reasons...but who was she kidding? She just wasn't in the mood for a fight(be it fighting old foes she might encounter or just arguing with Marco)...and she was even LESS of a mood when she saw the monster village...
It was a hole in the ground, they basically had homes made of mud- at least, Star HOPED it was mud. -and they were all basically eating garbage...as were the children, it was depressing.
Marco was equally depressed. Sure he'd seen the pictures in the history book of an impoverished country, maybe the occasional news story when there was nothing else to watch...but it never truly hit a person how bad something can be until you've seen it in person.
Star sighed, "I honestly don't know what's more depressing...the sewage running down the street or the large junk pile in the center of town."
Buff Frog huffed annoyed. "Show some respect! That's no pile of junk! That's your Grandmother, Queen Comet!"
Confused, the two looked closer. And sure enough, they saw that the junk pile did in fact- vaguely -resemble a Mewman woman.
"Wait, why do you have a statue of a Mewni Queen in the center of town?" Asked Marco confused.
Buff Frog sighs, "She was the only leader who treated us like PEOPLE...rather then 'something to scrape off your shoe'." He grumbled that last bit. "Things were...well, still not GREAT. But they were BETTER for us under her rule then any other Queen. And for us monsters, That was more the we could have ever hoped...or ever hoped since." He says that last part wishfully.
"And...you made the statue of the Queen you like out of garbage?" Asked Marco confused.
Buff Frog snorts, " Oh, so terribly sorry. We left our gold with the butler in our diamond vault." He said a mockingly snooty and sarcastic tone of voice.
"Fair enough", said a chastised Marco.
Star was only barely listening... "You know...come to think of it...My mom never really says anything about my grandma...nobody dose...except of course that she went to live on a grandma farm a long time ago, which is why we never see her anymore." Said Star, that last bit shifting from intrigued melancholy to her usual child-like bubbliness.
Both Buff Frog and Marco flinch, instinctively both males give each other a VERY universal 'knowing look' and promptly do 'rock, paper, scissors'...or what Marco ASSUMED was 'rock, paper, scissors'.
"Basilisk beats Roc, you have to tell her." Said Buff Frog grimly.
Marco groans but walks over to her resigned. "Uh, Star? I'm not sure if this means the same thing on Mewni as it dose earth but-
...5 minutes later, further in the swamp...
An old man snored in his rundown wagon that he stole from a 1920's Medicine Show on a planet called earth...it looked like it was only one stiff breeze away from falling to pieces...but it was...well...not HOME...but it was about as close as he'll ever get to one...
MY GRANDMA IS DEAD!?
The scream that shattered the peace of the swamp, caused the old man to wake up with a start. Slamming into his 'house'...which promptly causes it to go downhill...with him still inside!
'Dang it, I knew I should've attached that to SOMETHING.' Grumbled the old man as he desperately tried to steer the wagon so it didn't get smashed to pieces...AGAIN.
...
Marco desperately tried to calm down Star...
"I, wha- HOW?!"
Buff Frog sighed, he'd been hoping to avoid this...
"What do you know of a monster named Toff-
BANG!
They all turned around just in time to see a wagon barrel out of the jungle, turn on it's side, flip over both the statue and them and land back on it's wheels, finally halting.
The old man let out a sigh of releif-
CRACK!
-before the wagon completely falls apart. "Ah, consarn it! I just put this ding-dang thing back together from last time!" The man swears as he once more starts the agonizing process of putting his 'home' back together...
"Wait...are you...Pyro Ford Cruller?" Asked the voice a girl teen.
At that old slur/nickname, Ford cautiously uses the reflective side of his screwdriver to see behind him...an amphibian man- who he recognizes as Bulgolyubov and two kids dressed in lousy Woollett outfits. "Who wants to know?" He asks flatly.
"I'm sorry, who?" Asked the boy of the two.
"He was this conman who tried to scam everyone with fake magic and then burnt down his factory- killing hundreds -just to rake in the insurance money!" Said the girl...who's voice was sounding more and more familiar...where had he-
He shakes this thought off and went back to work- while still keeping up his guard- "Ha! Now that's just lazy! Like I'd be caught dead getting 'insurance', that's the real scam right there!"
"Uh, St- Er, my dear?" Bulgolyubov corrected himself quickly- though this didn't go unnoticed by Cruller. "I can't speak off who he was or what he did BEFORE coming to the swamp. But since coming to live here he's helped rebuild our homes, forage food, teach us ways to make the garbage we eat taste LESS like crap...in exchange we look the other way of him spending out in exile here." Bulgolyubov admitted with a shrug, "Bottom line: He's been a big help to making our lives...LESS miserable."
"Well that, but also considering how I can only assume you don't want anyone knowing who you are in those piss-poor get-ups- he savors their looks of shock -I think it be best you just forget you ever saw me and we go our separate ways." He says flatly before continuing repairs.
Although looking bewildered for a moment, the girls is looking to do just that. But the boy...he stays and looks at Ford curiously.
"Wait...what you said earlier...are you saying you DIDN'T commit the crime?"
The girl rolled her eyes, "Of course he committed the crime Marco! I mean, he was trying to sell an 'elixir' that would 'give everyone magic'" She says that last bit with a chuckle, "Which is of course completely ridiculous!"
"Why?" Asked the boy.
"...What do you mean why?" Asked the girl. "It's impossible to create new magic!" She says as if it were obvious.
The boy's eyes narrowed, "Star, I LITERALLY thought magic and other dimensions were impossible until you came into my life, so you'll have to forgive me if I feel like being close-minded on this isn't the right way to go..."
Ford dropped his tool, "Wait? Star? Star Butterfly?" He asked, turning around in shock. Staring at Star as if he'd seen a ghost...
...
Buff Frog groaned as the two teens winched, "Way to keep your identities secret, kids..." He grumbled.
Marco sighed, "Well now that the cats out of the bag..." He turns back to Star. "Star wasn't the whole point of us coming out here to hear BOTH sides of the story?" Asked Marco.
Star looked conflicted for a moment...but she too sighed, "Okay, yeah that's a good point..."
This statement finally shook Ford out of his thoughts and looked at her in surprise, "Your really going to hear me out?!" He asked amazed...and perhaps a bit impressed?
Star shrugged, "Yeah, sure. Why not? It's only fair, I guess." Star then realized something. "Wait...what exactly were you trying to sell? Everything I heard about the 'incident' was either all the lives you killed or how insane and unstable you are..." She asked inquisitively.
Marco and Buff Frog face-palmed over Star's 'diplomatic' overture. But Ford just laughed, "Yeah, that sounds about right...well, to put it simply: I boasted a wide selection of Vigors, Elixirs and Tonics that would allow people various magic abilities and other esoteric talents without relying on traditional magical sources like the realm of magic."
"THAT'S simple?" Asked Star confused.
But Ford was already digging up something from the wreck that used to be his wagon, "In fact, I think I still remember the jingle from one of my more popular products..."
The three watched stunned as Ford- within mere minutes! -quickly took some random pieces of junk, quickly cobbled together a piano and began to play on it...
Bucking Bronco!
It's how the West was won!
Bucking Bronco! A blast for everyone!
Lift up your spirits full and fly, Launch your friends into the sky!
Bucking Bronco! The law of gravity, defied!
The kids were sad, they missed the faire...
Bucking Bronco! Now they're overjoyed and lighter than air!
Bucking Bronco! It's better than a carnival ride, you should always keep a bottle close by your side
Bucking Bronco! The law of gravity, defied!
Both Buff Frog and Star happily clapped along excitedly. "Alright! WOO! That was incredible! Right, I'm totally convinced! You are definitely completely innocent!"
Marco groans, "Star, no! There's a difference between being open-minded and just being gullible! No tune- no matter how catchy -is admissible evidence in court on it's own!"
Ford chuckled, "Fair enough my boy! You'll have to forgive an old man, it's been awhile since I've been allowed to cut loose and have a proper shindig." He promptly dismantles the piano back down to it's basic parts. "Right, fun's fun. But for real, I think I still have at least one vigor left..."
The three await as the old man dug through the scrap heap that used to be his 'house'...each having their own thoughts...
Star: although willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, was nevertheless confident that this would be a flop...All magic was reliant on the realm of magic. Even SHE knew that...
Buff Frog: was being polite out of respect for all the years of service the man had given his community...but nevertheless had already written this off as yet another of the man's 'crackpot idea's'...
Marco: ...well he honestly didn't know what to think, he was no expert on magic after all. He was mainly doing this to help Star learn to be more responsible after all. So he was keeping his opinion on the old man neutral until proven otherwise...
Three trains of thought...all heading for a collision...
...III...
TO BE CONTINUED?
AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Go to my P,a,t,r,e,o,n account!
Love me, flame me, review me