Title- Running Away
Author- Tiffany Nicole (me)
Rating- PG 13 (?)
Characters- Tracy, Luke, Alice
Summary/Spoiler- Tracy admits her true feelings to Luke but later blames to on being drunk but it turns out she wasn't drinking.
Night fell on Port Charles and for the first time in a while the Quartermaine home was silent and calm. This place was rarely ever this quiet, she remembered. Someone was always running around and or complaining about something, usually her. After all she was Tracy Quartermaine and everyone in Port Charles seemed to have their reason for hating or blaming her. Whether or not she had actually done anything had yet to be seen but it was expected. Her family the most.
She entered one of the many rooms in the "home" and walked over towards a mantel where pictures of family members were collecting dust. She looked at them one at a time, reflecting and remembering. Edward, her father, or "daddy" as she called him. It was a term usually used as a symbol of love and admiration and that's how it started out in the beginning. But now she only really called him that because she knew it got under his skin and getting a feeling of disgust was better than no notice at all...wasn't it? Where was he now? Probably out on business with her first born son Ned.
Next to her father's photo was one of her loving sainted mother Lila. The only woman, or person it seemed, that loved her unconditionally and at least tried to accept her for who she was. Her death hit Tracy hard. The only thing that can make her vulnerable and hurt continuously is the remembrance of this most painful loss. Tracy took extra time to admire and remember her mother. As she was doing this, Luke walked in unnoticed. He took this as an advantage and watched her from across the room. She was standing in front of Lila's photo, just staring at it. He knew Tracy missed her dearly but what he didn't understand was why she constantly tortured herself by doing this. He didn't say anything, just watched and studied. She had a drink on the mantel in front of her, it looked like straight vodka. Not her usual choice, he thought.
Luke was knocked out of his thoughts when he heard a quiet sob. Tracy Quartermaine-Spencer, or spankybuns as he liked to call her, was standing there crying. Inside his heart was breaking for her. He fought against his better judgement and went to her. He took her gently but forcefully into his arms to comfort her. To si surprise, she didn't pull away. Instead she cried silently against him as he held her tight. Tracy started to calm down and stopped crying but she was still very much upset. She pulled back a little and looked at him. She didn't know why he was being so nice to her but he was there and she hated to admit it but she needed him.
"Thank you." She managed to say just below a whisper.
"Are you okay?" He asked in a soft voice. Tracy wiped at her eyes.
"I don't even know what being okay feels like anymore."
"Eh, its overrated." Luke said, trying to lift her spirits. Tracy gave a sad smile. "Don't tell me my comic charm is wearing off."
"No its perfectly intact as well as your ego." Tracy replied and Luke smile warmly.
"There's the spankybuns I know." Tracy looked down sadly and Luke tried to lift it up but she resisted. "What's wrong now?" He asked and she began to cry again. Inside she was kicking herself for being so emotional and unstable in front of him but it felt good to let go.
"Why her?" Tracy asked in a barely audible voice. Luke wrapped his arms fully around her and held her even tighter that before. She rested her head against him and hugged back. A part of her didn't want to give in to him for fear of getting hurt. But the other part fought harder and won.
"You'll drive yourself crazy if you try to find an answer to that." He said and started gently rubbing small circles on her back. Tracy sighed.
"Who said I wasn't crazy to begin with. I certainly don't feel very sane."
"Out of most of the people in this town, I'd say you're pretty sane. I mean look at some of the wack jobs in this crazy town, Helena Cassadine in particular. She has enough craziness to fill Shadybrook." Luke said and Tracy smiled and shook her head.
"Luke Spencer you are too much." Tracy replied in a soft voice. She was feeling surprisingly better and she couldn't believe it was because of Luke. Sure they were married but never had one of her husbands actually been able to comfort her the way he did and it scared her. Was he really different or was he just a better liar then the others.
"There's no such thing as too much when it comes to me." Luke replied with a grin. He was happy that she seemed to be less upset. He then noticed she was deep in thought and hoped she wasn't thinking about Lila again or worse. "Hey, earth to Tracy. You okay?"
"What? Yeah. Actually I'm more than okay." What am I saying, Tracy thought. She felt as though she had no control over what she was saying, like the little angel on her shoulder was tired of the devil getting the control and it was the angel's turn to take over.
"Oh really. How do you feel wife?" Luke asked intrigued.
"In love." Tracy answered shortly and Luke's eyes felt as though they were going to pop out of his head. Had he heard her right, did she say love, he thought. Before he could say anything she was guiding his head down to her and her lips were on his. Then his mind went completely blank of all thoughts other than the two of them, together. Tracy's mind did the same. For a moment everything felt right. The walls were gone and desires let live. But then their minds caught up with what was happening. Tracy pulled away and put her hand over her mouth. Luke was just stunned by the whole turn of events and he was confused.
"What...um.. I." Luke couldn't put his thoughts together or even put them to words.
"I'm sorry..I. shouldn't have done that." Tracy said quickly. Her mind was going in circles and was pleading with it to stop.
"Don't be sorry, I'm not. Let's just chill and I don't know talk about this." Luke said trying to make sense of it all. "Let's sit down and I'll refresh your drink and we'll you know...talk." Drink, she thought, that's it.
"No, I'm clearly drunk enough as it is. That's why I said those things and kissed you. Listen to me, I'm babbling and my head is spinning." Tracy said, praying that he would believe her.
"Do you need an aspirin or something, maybe water or anything?" Luke asked concerned.
"No, just no. I can't do this." Tracy said and ran out of the room right to her bedroom. She closed the door and locked it behind her. She sighed and leaned against the door. "Oh my god. What was I thinking? That was so stupid!" She said aloud and she looked up. "This is payback for not keeping my promise right. Mother if you're listening...help."
Back in the other room, Luke was still trying to reel in what happened. What had he done wrong, what was going through Tracy's mind. He was relieved from his thoughts when Alice walked in.
"Hello Mr. Luke." Alice said cheerfully.
"Hi sunshine." Luke said less peppy as usual and Alice noticed this.
"What's the matter? You seem depressed. Is it about Skye being pregnant?"
"No its not about that. Tracy and I..well..we, something happened."
"What happened? You can tell me, I won't tell anyone."
"Well I really don't know what happened. I came in here, she was crying and upset and I tried to help. Next thing I know she says she loves me and we're kissing. Then it just stopped, blamed it on her drink and she rushed out. I just don't know what to do." Luke said and sighed. Alice couldn't believe what he was telling her. The phone rang, interrupting them. "I'll answer it Alice." Luke said and went to answer the phone. Alice noticed the glass on the mantel and picked it up. She looked at it for a second, wondering if it was as strong as it looked. She sniffed it and almost dropped it on the floor.
"Mr. Luke, you said that Miss Tracy blamed it on being drunk right and this is her glass she was drinking from?" Alice asked. Luke had hung up and walked back over to her.
"Yeah why?" Luke asked confused.
"She played you good. This is water she was drinking." Alice informed him. Luke was stunned that Tracy had lied but still a feeling of hope came. Maybe they could have a future. Maybe she really did love him, maybe even as much as he'd fallen for her. Maybe they could both stop running away from their fears and each other.
Maybe, just maybe.