Remus was going in and out of consciousness. At first, he vaguely remembered a canopy of trees above him, with the cries of other werewolves as they transformed. He remembered Dora there – but why was she there? Had someone found her and brought her to the werewolf encampment? No, no – it must have been a hallucination. Then, he was in Dora's childhood bedroom. It was soft, bright, and colorful. Voices he recognized were speaking – but whose voices were they? He looked up and thought he saw Sirius, but that couldn't be right either.

He closed his eyes more tightly; perhaps he was dead, after all. It was the only fate he felt he deserved, anyway.

"Remus?" a familiar voice called. It sounded like Andromeda, but it smelled like Dora; how could it be? Perhaps Dora had found him in the encampment and brought him back. Perhaps he and Dora been killed together. He grimaced and winced at once; he had been the cause of her death. Even in the afterlife, he should be blamed for his failures.

"D-Dora?" he croaked. "Are we dead?"

"No, Remus, it's Andromeda. You're all alive, including your baby."

"B-baby?"

"Yes, Remus, your baby is doing just fine," Andromeda said impatiently. "You and Nymphadora were Splinched yesterday, but you're all fine. You need rest, and then we'll talk."

Remus nodded weakly, and Andromeda tipped something down his throat. His eyelids grew heavier, and he went to sleep.

….

"Dora?" Remus rasped. It was afternoon, or so her unicorn-shaped clock indicated.

"It's Andromeda again," Andromeda said quietly. She was sitting in the desk chair, opposite the bed.

"What happened?" Remus asked hoarsely. "How did I get here?"

"I have a few questions about that myself. Nymphadora found you. The pendant was burning yesterday morning and she Apparated to find you among werewolves. She Apparated you both out, but Splinched both of you in the process. I found you in the garden."

"Is she alright?" Remus' heart began hammering, wondering what new calamities he'd brought on his wife – again – even while attempting to maintain his distance.

"It was lucky Nymphadora had Dittany in her rucksack available. She had a nasty gash in her thigh and shoulder, which nearly ripped her muscles out. Dittany worked well, and she shouldn't scar."

"Good."

"You nearly died again, Remus."

"Oh."

"That's all you have to say for yourself? Oh?" Andromeda was furious. Remus could see her nostrils flaring and her face set into a disappointed frown.

"You nearly died and 'oh' is all you have to say for yourself? What have you been doing? You left Nymphadora, again."

"It-It's a long story," Remus rasped. "I was to return today."

"Were you now? Really?" Andromeda asked angrily. "Where have you been? Nymphadora didn't mention any teenaged wizards on the run." Remus was trembling; Dora's wrath he could handle, but Andromeda's wrath was something else entirely.

"I found Harry," Remus said through ragged breaths. "I offered to join them but he said no. I thought Dora and the baby would be better without me."

"So you did plan on leaving her?" Andromeda was livid. "You promised her you wouldn't leave. You promised, Remus!"

"I sent messages," Remus exhaled uncomfortably. "I kept the promise."

"But my daughter had to drag you – quite literally – back home. That's not keeping your promise, Remus!"

Remus was breathing irregularly; he had so much to tell her and Dora, but his sides were throbbing.

"Talk later please? Hurts," Remus begged. "How is Dora? Our b-baby?"

Andromeda sighed heavily but looked Remus in the eye. "She's fine and resting now. She's been worried about you, even with those little messages you sent her. We thought you'd be back sooner…I can't believe my daughter had to drag you home."

Remus felt the tears at the corners of his eyes, as he heard the anger in her voice.

"The baby's fine too," Andromeda admitted. "I was up most of the full moon, afraid it would hurt Nymphadora, but it didn't. I believe it's too small, anyway."

"Good," Remus said softly. "I was worried too."

"You were? Really?" Andromeda asked incredulously. "Here I thought my daughter was the only one who cared about her own child."

"No, Andromeda," Remus forced himself to say. "I love Dora, and our baby."

"You left her," Andromeda said quietly. "How can we believe you?" There was an awkward, heavy silence between them.

"Never mind," she dismissed. "You can't talk very well, anyway." She stood up from the chair and looked at Remus.

"When you can talk, Remus, you had better be honest with me, and my daughter," Andromeda said sternly. "I've never been more disappointed in you."

….

"You're awake," Dora said softly, upon entering the bedroom. Remus looked up from the bed, finally feeling well enough to speak after nearly dying again from the transformation.

"I'm so sorry, Dora," Remus said hastily. "I know your mother is furious with me, and I'm sure you are as well, but please allow me to explain myself."

"Go ahead," she said flatly.

"Can I ask how you are? How is our baby?" Remus asked.

"Fine for both of us. Keep talking."

"I left at first because I thought I was putting you all in mortal danger," Remus said reluctantly. "I wouldn't have been able to leave otherwise. You know this – we're mated now. I-I can't leave you unless I think you're in mortal danger."

"We're all in mortal danger."

"This felt different."

"Doesn't it always, with you?" Dora seethed.

"I did find Harry, Ron, and Hermione," Remus said softly. "I offered to join them on the mission Dumbledore had left them."

"Am I to assume they refused, as you were nearly dead among werewolves?"

"Harry refused," Remus said, cringing at his own behavior. "For good reason."

"Well, don't keep me guessing," Dora said hotly, and crossed her arms over her chest.

"You must believe my…insecurities were especially strong then. You had just lost your job and taken out a thousand Galleons for Wolfsbane Potion for me. I panicked that I was the reason you and our baby would be destitute. I was afraid that because of my condition, you and our baby would be doomed to the same itinerant life my parents had."

"That's not good enough," Dora grumbled. "Those aren't good reasons."

"I never said they were," Remus said quietly, feeling the shame wash over him. "They were thoughts borne out of my distress, and of all people, Harry had me see reason."

"Again, don't keep me waiting," Dora said crossly.

"When I offered to join Harry and his friends, they asked about you," Remus said quietly. "I told them you were having a baby, and their reaction surprised me—"

"—they were probably happy for us?"

"Yes. They offered their congratulations, and Harry asked why I wasn't with you."

"Clever blighter."

"I told him I regretted marrying you," Remus confessed. He looked up to see Dora crying. "Not because of you! Never because of you! Because of everything I've done to you!"

"You told him you regret marrying me?" Dora cried.

"Sweet—"

"—don't sweetheart me, Remus," Dora snapped. "You have no right, after what you've done."

"Please, believe me," Remus begged. "I regret it only because you've lost your job, and you're terrified to lose our child because of what I am!"

"I'm incredibly disappointed in you, Remus."

Remus' heart clenched upon hearing those words, but he continued. "I kept part of my promise," Remus mumbled. "I did send you a Patronus every night. I know I left, but I kept that part of the promise. I kept…something."

Dora exhaled forcefully. "You had the decency to keep one of your promises."

"I want to tell you everything, but I'm afraid you'll be more disappointed with me."

"Get over it. I need you to be honest with me."

"I hexed Harry."

"What the fuck did you do that for? He was trying to get you to see reason!"

"I was angry, Dora. I was furious that he called me a coward for wanting to leave you and our child behind. I was angry that he called me out for what I am, and what I always have been – a coward. I was angry at myself, and I took it out on him. I left in a rush and immediately regretted it," Remus said guiltily.

"When was this? Two nights ago?" Dora demanded.

"It was at least a week ago."

"Why didn't you come back immediately?"

"I…was embarrassed. I felt ashamed at what I had done, and assumed you would not want to see me. You told me that if I left you again, you wouldn't want me in your life anymore," Remus said softly. "I took that seriously."

"You were going to leave me without telling me?" Dora cried. "You thought I would just figure it out?! Did you really believe that if enough time passed, I'd forget I was married and having your child?"

"I wasn't thinking," Remus insisted. "If I had given it any rational thought I never would have left."

"But you did leave, Remus. You left me. You left our child. How could you?"

"I can't explain it, Dora. It was instinct, you must believe me," Remus pleaded. "I could never have left otherwise."

"Fine. Let's pretend you're telling me the truth about your 'instinct.' Why didn't you come back sooner?"

"It was shame at first," Remus admitted. "Shame that I had left you at all, even if I was following a misguided instinct."

"What happened after the usual shame?" Dora asked, still seething.

"I remembered you were alone," he said softly. "Without protection."

"I have my parents here."

"This home is not under the Fidelius Charm. I was afraid you would be targeted again," Remus said despondently. "I was afraid Fenrir would still go after you."

"And?" Dora demanded.

"I was right." Remus looked up into Dora's now-widened eyes.

"How do you mean, you were right?"

"Fenrir was here just before the full moon," Remus said, looking pained. "He was waiting and had taken Wolfsbane Potion. He was going to bite you, if not worse."

"How did you know that?" Dora gasped.

"I smelled him. I returned here just before moonrise and smelled him right away. I was able to Apparate us back to the old encampment moments before moonrise," Remus explained. "I didn't realize we wouldn't be alone."

"So that's how I found you there," Dora concluded. "They called you traitor and threatened to kill me."

"Fenrir must have returned to the encampment and turned them all against me. I'm lucky to be alive, and it's all because of you, Dora."

"What would you have done if Fenrir wasn't here?"

"I was going to Apparate to the cellar and transform there, as usual," Remus elaborated. "With Fenrir here, I didn't have a choice. I hadto get him away from you."

Dora was still, evidently deep in thought. "I need time to think on this," she decided. "I'll have my dad bring you some food."

"You can tell your mother everything, if you'd like," Remus murmured. "I know I have disappointed the both of you, but I hope I'll earn your forgiveness – and hers."

"We'll see," Dora said sadly, as she stood up from the chair and crossed the threshold, leaving Remus alone with his thoughts again.

….

It was a few hours before Ted arrived with food. Remus heard the soft knocking on the door, and called "come in," as his freshly healing ribs were still too tender to allow him to stand up on his own.

"Remus," Ted said curtly. "I've brought you dinner."

"Thank you, Ted."

"Dora told us everything."

"I see."

"While I am very glad you spared my daughter from Fenrir's advances, I am disappointed in you as well, son," Ted said somberly. "Leaving Dora – and your child – is a serious offense."

"I know," Remus sighed sadly. "I wish I could explain how I was feeling and why it was so distressing. I am ashamed of myself, possibly more than I ever have been."

"Dora is more understanding than her mother." Remus hung his head in shame at Ted's admission.

"You are not quite a father yet, Remus," Ted said slowly. "Until you become one, you will not understand the pain that comes from seeing someone hurt your child."

"The only one I feel has hurt my child," Remus emphasized, "is me. I have hurt my child. I have doomed my child to a life it does not deserve. Dora had a choice – my child, my poor child – does not." The tears welled up in Remus' eyes again.

"No child had a choice in who their parents are," Ted said gently. "'Dromeda certainly didn't, and look what happened to her as a result of her parents' prejudiced views. Look at our Dora – she didn't ask for a homicidal aunt, and that's who she was given as a relative. Yet I see my daughter, strong, proud, and capable. Don't assume anything of your child before they arrive. I was certain Dora would hate me too, for the life I had given her as a result of being Muggleborn."

"You knew all of this, Remus, and you still left," Ted reprimanded. "I told you all of this months ago, and you still left my daughter, and your child."

"I kept a part of the promise I'd made," Remus said feebly. "I did communicate with her."

"It will be up to Dora to see if she will forgive you once more," Ted said sternly.

"I don't deserve her forgiveness," Remus rasped. "I don't deserve her."

"She'll be the judge of that, Remus. You've inflicted a lot of damage on my daughter. I will stand by whatever decision she makes," Ted said firmly.

"I understand," Remus relented. "Do you know when I'll see her again?"

"She'll make the decision when she's ready," Ted replied. "Until then, my face will be the only one you see."

"Okay." While it wasn't what Remus had hoped to hear, he comforted himself in the knowledge that he was home – for now.

….

Remus was growing restless as he healed. Between the Splinching injuries and the injuries from the disastrous full moon, he had been bedridden for days. His only companion, other than Ted stopping by with food, was Ophelia. The cat had made Remus its bed, and he felt grateful for the furry companion.

"At least I haven't disappointed you," he murmured to the cat, late one afternoon. She was purring contentedly on Remus' lap, blissfully unaware of the high tensions in the home.

"Ophelia, do you remember when you, Dora, and I all lived together in that little flat?" he asked the cat. She merely blinked at him.

"I do," Remus continued. "It was one of the happiest times of my life. Happier than my days at school, if you can believe it. I loved my friends, of course, but Dora's different. I'm sure you know this, as she's your mistress." Remus patted the purring feline, scratching behind its ears.

"I wish we could go back to that time. Before I made all the mistakes. I should never have left Dora," Remus mumbled to the lazy cat. "We could have been happy this entire time, and I've fucked it up. You know, Ophelia, this is what I always dreamt of…my own family. I never wanted to be an alpha, but Fenrir saw to that when I was four years old. I thought I would never get this chance."

The cat continued purring and rubbing its face against Remus' hand, seeking further affection.

"An affectionate kitty you are," Remus murmured. "Dora gave me everything I wanted and more. She's the best thing that ever happened to me, you know? Well, of course you do, you were there." Remus smiled, despite his pain.

"I thought I had reached the limits of what life offered me when Dumbledore said I could go to Hogwarts and become a real wizard," Remus continued quietly. "Then I met my friends. You never knew them, but I think you might have liked Sirius. We called him Padfoot. It all fell apart almost sixteen years ago. I was terribly lonely for so long. I assumed that the happiest parts of my life were far behind me…until I met Dora." The cat blinked owlishly at him, and he assumed it was interested in continuing the conversation.

"Well, you know her," Remus said with a smile. "Gorgeous, with or without her colors. Clever, terribly clumsy, kind, funny, talented, and absolutely brilliant. She's got this incredible will and passion for life. It's infectious. In the grey I'd grown so accustomed to, she came into my life with all her colors. To know her is to love her," he said softly. "I love her more than I ever knew I could love someone."

Ophelia looked up at him with her big, yellow eyes, twitching her whiskers ever so slightly.

"Oh, Ophelia, what am I going to do?" Remus lamented. "Look at what I've done to her – to us. We're mated now, and she cannot leave me. Not really, anyway. We're bound to one another now, more than I ever thought possible. I should be happier, but all I can think of is how I've ruined her life. This time, I don't think it's the lycanthropy. It's because I left, again and again. If only I'd let myself be happy."

"But you know, Ophelia, happiness was always taken away from me," Remus mused. "I thought I had it until a certain Dark wizard split us apart. I was terrified – I still am – it will be taken from me again. I couldn't let that happen to Dora, or our baby. I never thought I could have a baby of my own. Just imagine it, Ophelia. I hope our baby is like Dora in everything, even her clumsiness. She's the best person I've ever known, and our child would be lucky to be just like her. Even if Dora never allows me back in her life, you'll be here, won't you?"

"You can take care of them for me," Remus continued sadly. "It won't be the same, but Dora calls you her little monster. I am a real monster. Dora and our child are better off with you as the little monster than with me as the real monster. Dora tells me she doesn't care, but look at what's happened to her. She's lost her job and she lives with her parents again. She was happy in that flat. Maybe one day she'll get one again and she can live there with our baby. I'll be around, somewhere, I hope. I don't deserve either of them." Remus was now crying, and his tears were falling onto the startled cat.

"Maybe, if I die in this war, she'll find someone else," Remus sobbed. "Someone worthy to be with her. Someone who won't leave her because he's too afraid of loving her, or being happy with her. Someone who will be the father of my child. Someone my child will love and admire because he's not a monster. Someone who can give Dora everything she's ever dreamed of." Remus was weeping now, and the cat was staring at him with an alarmed expression.

"She should move on, Ophelia," Remus blubbered. "If she chooses me, it will be a miracle. If she chooses me, I won't run this time. If she chooses me, Ophelia, I might find happiness again. She is the truest happiness I've ever known. She is the one and only love of my life. She was meant to be my forever."

Ophelia hopped off Remus' lap, evidently disturbed by his violent cries. "I know, Ophelia," he wept. "I am difficult to be around. I don't know what Dora ever saw in me, but for whatever it was, I will always be grateful. I hope she forgives me one day, and that I can know my child, even if from afar. They will always be my everything." Remus continued sobbing, alone, in the smallest bedroom of the Tonks residence. He cried, his body heaving with pain, but nothing compared to the turmoil in his heart.

….

Tonkses Interlude

"I think I might go up to see him," Tonks announced over breakfast that morning.

"To tell him to go back to the cottage, as he obviously has no desire to be with you?" Andromeda asked sharply.

"No, mum, to talk to him," Tonks replied tersely. "He hasn't run off yet."

"With all those injuries he had, it will be at least another week before he's able to run," Ted interjected.

"We're now halfway to the next moon," Tonks said, looking down at the moonstone pendant. "I want to make him Wolfsbane Potion, but I need to know that he'll be here."

"What makes you think he won't be here?" Andromeda hissed. "The fact that he's left you again?"

"He might have other interests, such as keeping other werewolves away," Dora snapped. "Unless you fancy two lycanthropes in the house, or a dead daughter."

"Dora," Ted said sternly. "Be respectful. We raised you to be more polite."

"Tell me that next time you've got a human life growing inside your abdomen," she retorted hotly.

"Nymphadora, enough with the theatrics," Andromeda sighed. "You are going to see him now?"

"I may as well," Tonks said resolutely. "Why don't you come with me, mum? Bring him breakfast?"

"I was just going to do that," Ted offered.

"Let's all three of us ambush him, then," Tonks suggested. "Good morning, Remus, it's three against one…well, four, if you count whoever is growing inside me."

"Ophelia's been with him," Ted noted. "I'll bring Remus' food, 'Dromeda, why don't you bring Ophelia's, and Dora, you can come up with us. If you're feeling well enough to see him, then you can go in."

The three Tonkses agreed to the proposal, and within minutes, the three of them were ascending the stairs to get to the smallest bedroom.

Tonks was ready to open the door when she heard Remus speaking… "It all fell apart almost sixteen years ago. I was terribly lonely for so long. I assumed that the happiest parts of my life were far behind me…until I met Dora," Remus' strained voice said.

Tonks realized he was speaking to the cat, and beckoned her parents over to listen in on the conversation. Tonks, still an Auror at heart, had cast a charm to enable Remus' conversation to be easier for them all to hear.

As he spoke, Tonks' heart clenched and melted. Remus was in obvious distress, and he was sobbing loudly in the room over his misdeeds and mistakes.

It was when Remus said, "Maybe, if I die in this war, she'll find someone else. Someone worthy to be with her. Someone who won't leave her because he's too afraid of loving her, or being happy with her. Someone who will be the father of my child. Someone my child will love and admire because he's not a monster. Someone who can give Dora everything she's ever dreamed of…" that Tonks began crying as well. Each of his heartbreaking, passionate statements brought fresh tears to her eyes.

Tonks looked up to see that her parents were also red-rimmed; even her mother was dabbing at the corners of her eyes at Remus' laments. It was obvious to all of them that Remus was suffering alone, and had been suffering alone for far too long.

By the time Remus' sobs had subsided and the Tonkses entered the bedroom, Remus was asleep. His eyes were still puffy and red, and Tonks' heart hurt from seeing him in such a pitiful, broken state.

"I'm going to wait here until he wakes up," Tonks whispered to her parents. She brushed his hair out of his face, and placed her palm on his scarred cheek. "He needs to know he's my forever, too."

….

Judging by the light of day, it was nearly evening when Remus' eyes fluttered open from his weepy nap. He looked up in surprise to see a mop of fuchsia hair just inches from his nose. He inhaled deeply and was immediately put at ease from Dora's intoxicating smell. Now that it was intermingled with his, and the new warmth from the life growing inside her, he felt as if he could never get enough of the scent.

He was surprised, however, to find her in bed with him. It had been over a week since the last full moon, and since their catastrophic reunion, she had kept her distance from him. Not that he blamed her – he had acted even more unforgivably than before. Previously, he had left her; now, he had left her and their child.

"That tickles, Remus," Dora mumbled sleepily.

"What does?" he asked, his heart threatening to burst out of his chest.

"You're sniffing me. It tickles."

"Oh. I'm sorry." Remus pulled back slightly from Dora's hair and neck, trying to keep a more respectful distance from her body.

"You didn't need to get away from me," Dora said impatiently. "Just, you know, stop sniffing so hard."

"Dora, not that I'm not incredibly grateful, but why are you here with me?"

"I wanted to be with you."

"Why?"

"Because I love you, you daft man."

"You do?"

"Of course I do. I might not like you sometimes, or like what you do, but I can still love you," Dora said softly. "I wanted to be here with you…I thought you might have wanted me around."

"You wouldn't believe how much I've missed you," Remus murmured into her ear.

"Probably about as much as I've missed you," Dora replied.

"I'm so sorry, Dora."

"You'll always be. I think I just need to get used to it. Maybe you'll forgive yourself too."

Remus felt a quiet joy in his heart upon hearing that she still loved him and wanted him with her, but he needed to know more. "How's our baby?" he asked tentatively.

"We're at nearly ten weeks, my mum thinks. It should be the size of a lime soon."

"Wow," Remus breathed. "Can I put my hand on your belly?"

"Not much difference, I think, but go ahead."

Remus reached around to Dora's abdomen and placed his hand just underneath her navel. There was a tiny bump there, and his heart thumped loudly upon feeling the slight change in her body.

"That's our baby in there," Remus said, awestruck. "Wow."

"That's the reaction I was hoping for weeks ago," Dora said flatly. "Took you long enough to get there."

"Did-did you feel anything in the last moon?"

"No. Mum reckons it's 'cause it's too small. Maybe the next moon I'll feel something." She fiddled with something around her neck, and snuggled more closely into Remus.

"Just over two weeks till the full moon," she murmured. "Today's the first of September, you know."

"I feel terribly for all the Muggleborn children who thought they were attending this year," Remus said darkly. "The Ministry has made it mandatory for all magical children to attend school, and they must prove their magical parentage to attend."

"That's bullshit," Dora said indignantly.

"They've started a Muggleborn Registration Commission as well."

"A what?!" Dora whipped around, her hair now a fiery red, and faced Remus.

"I'm not sure if you've been reading The Prophet, but it's been underway for a little while, led by none other than Dolores Umbridge," Remus said bitterly.

"That fucking toad-faced hag," Dora whispered angrily. "I'll be this is why she wanted my list – make them all easier to find!"

"I think that's precisely what she wanted to do," Remus said. "And you made it that much harder, as now Muggleborns will have to register themselves with the Ministry."

"What happens to them if they don't register?"

"It's as bad, or worse, for those who do register. The ones who do register will be brought in for questioning. They're all sham court proceedings. They're just a way for the Ministry to imprison Muggleborns under the auspices of the law. The ones who don't register will be caught, eventually, and returned to the Ministry anyway."

"D'you think my dad will be one of them?"

"I'm afraid so."

"He'll be sacked, I'm sure of it," Dora said glumly. "They won't keep him on."

"Let's hope for the best, sweetheart." Remus was pensive for a moment. "Can I still call you that?"

"If you want."

"Can I still call you Dora?"

"I've been Dora to you for a while. I think it'd be weird to change it now."

"Are we going to be okay?"

Dora was silent for several moments, apparently deep in thought over this enquiry.

"You did the very minimum in keeping your promise to me," Dora said finally. "Maybe we can salvage this."

"Dora, I—"

"—I heard you talking with Ophelia this morning," Dora said abruptly.

"I didn't realize anyone was listening," Remus said uncomfortably. "That was—"

"-Is that how you really feel, Remus?" Dora interrupted.

"Yes," he replied guiltily. "You weren't…I didn't want you to see that."

"Why not?"

"I didn't want you to feel guilted into being with me."

"You're my forever too, you know," Dora interjected. "I was never guilted into anything. I just hope that forever is easier than now."

Remus' body tensed as he heard Dora repeating his own statement – she was his forever, and he was hers.

"I hope it's easier too, Dora," Remus said, clutching her closer to him. He placed his hand on her small bump, still in awe over the life they had created together. "I hope so, too."