(A/N: Hicha! Lady Hiran here! GUESS WHAT? I have good news and bad news. The good newsis thatone of my personas is well! YAHOO! The bad news is that it's that Goody-Goody, Amai-Hiran. (sighs)Oh well. A Recap's a Recap. Onward and upward, peeps!)
Hello everyone. I am Amai-Hiran. I am ever so pleased to meet you. Now then, let's recap, shall we?
Hotaru and Hajime returned home with Hotaru out for blood, wanting to (Amai- Oh I can't say this! It's too deplorable) (Authoress- Say it or I'll fill your dress with stink bugs.) (Amai-shuddering breath) w-wanting to t-toss Kakashi' body over a prison fence and let the prisoners inside have their way with him, ugh (covers face with hands)
A-anyhoo, Hotaru was upset by the fact that Kakashi stole not one but TWO of her kisses (her first and second) and climbed out on the roof to get some air only to find her private spot had been impeded by none other thanKakashihimself.
On a sudden note of inspiration, Hajime brings out several crates of Pocky which automatically quells his siblings rage (Authoress- ALMOST! There's still the whole, Kakashi in a dress thing to address!) Right, well, anyway, that's the recap.
Oh please hurry up and get well soon guys! I don't think I can do this again!.
Hotaru hummed to herself as she packed away the extra lunches and started on breakfast.
It was early, about 6:04 AM. But with all the extra bodies that were coming with the twins today, all this extra food was necessary.
-FLASHBACK-
"BWAHAHAHAHA! Kakashi-sensei? 'm never gonna ferget this." Naruto howled, pounding the floor with his fist.
"J-just shut up, Naruto." Kakashi growled.
The past twenty minutes, he had been forced to dance in time to old Britney Spears songs…in a dress…a rather short sexy red number made of patent leather that had once belonged to the Uzumaki Twin's dead mother, Otome.
"I hafta admit, Kakashi-perv, the stilettos add a nice touch." Hotaru snickered.
"And the lipstick? Stunning." Temari smirked, "Absolutely stunning.
Kakashi threw open a door and slammed it shut.
"That's a closet." Hajime snorted. (PFFFTT! Kakashi-chan's in the Cloooosset! Nahnahnahnahnaaaahnah!)
Kakashi threw the door open again and stormed up the stairs.
"Pfft…Hee hee hee!" Hotaru laughed, "I'm gonna get a lot of mileage outta this!"
Tanpopo, curled happily in her lap, keeled in agreement.
Gaara, Kankuro, Shino, Lee, Jiraiya and Gai chewed on Pocky given to them by Hotaru in the kitchen. (Please note, NO ONE steals HER Pocky. The last one that tried THAT little stunt, is still in the hospital)
They watched in amusement as Kakashi thundered down the stairs (sans dress) and stormed over to Hotaru and Hajime.
"There." He spat, "Happy now?"
"Mmm…nope." Hotaru said snippily, "There's one last thing I wantcha ta do for me."
"If you say kiss Gai, you can forget it!" Kakashi cried in horror.
Gai and Lee choked on their Pocky from the prospect.
Gaara fought down the urge to kill himself from the horrible images flooding his mind.
Shino wondered vaguely if his insects wouldn't mind to terribly eating his eyes.
Kankuro slammed his head repeatedly on the table to rid himself of the images.
Naruto looked like he might puke.
Jiraiya DID puke.
Temari was indifferent.
"That wasn't what I had in mind…but GREAT IDEA, Kakashi-perv!" Hotaru grinned wickedly, "I'll have to save THAT ONE for later! No, what I want is for you and the ninja-tots to come to school with me and Ha-chan tomorrow."
"School?" Kakashi blinked, "With you two? Why?"
"No reason." Hajime shrugged, "We just wanna see how ya handle yerselves."
"Count me out." Temari said calmly. "I've got better things to do."
"What point is there?" Gaara snorted superiorly, "A meaningless waste of time."
"We could be spending the time training." Kankuro nodded, "I'm out too."
"Sounds cool!" Naruto said, eyes glittering with excitement, "Will there be ramen there?"
"Of course." Hotaru smiled.
"I'M IN!" Naruto cried, pumping his fist.
"If Naruto's in then so am I!" Lee declared.
"And as his sensei, I must oversee the welfare of my student!" Gai declared.
"…" Shino gave no reply.
"It has a roach infestation in the basement!" Hajime said in a singsong voice.
"I'll go." Shino said quickly.
Jiraiya looked as though he was tossing the idea of going around.
Hajime sighed and patted Hotaru on the shoulder, "Sorry sis."
He walked over to Jiraiya and whispered, "High School Girls...plus Short Skirts…you do the math."
Jiraiya's face went bright red and a thin river of drool escaped his mouth.
Hajime rejoined his twin (who was sending him a glare that would kill anyone else in his position).
"He's, uh, in." Hajime coughed.
"Riiiiight." Hotaru growled, massaging her temple.
Kakashi was coming because he didn't have a choice. Now there was just the matter of the Suna-siblings to deal with.
"You know…It's understandable that you're afraid." Hotaru said, rubbing the underside of Tanpopo's chin as she spoke, causing the kit's eyes to lazily shut.
"Did you just imply that we're-" Gaara said slowly, eyes narrowing.
"It's okay. Really." Hotaru said reassuringly, continuing to stare at the blissed out face of her fox in her efforts to not laugh, "I understand. You're in a new world, with new things that are completely unfamiliar to you; it's only logical that you'd be scared."
Gaara stomped up to her and attempted to psyche her out with his ultimate death glare.
Hotaru smiled up at him (immune since she's family; see chapter 8).
"I…am not…afraid." He said coldly.
"Neither are we." Temari snarled, appearing on his right, Kankuro on his left.
"Really! It's okay!" Hotaru continued, "You don't have to if you're afra-"
"We're going." The Suna-siblings growled in unison.
"Great! Glad that's settled!" Hajime smiled.
"Oi, Ha-chan! Help me round up all our old uniforms willya?" Hotaru said, climbing off the sofa, "They'll need to be washed."
"What will those guys wear?" Hajime asked, jerking his thumb towards Gai, Kakashi and Jiraiya.
"Dad's old stuff." Hotaru reasoned.
"If your cool with that, fine." Hajime said as the mounted the stairs.
Gaara, Kankuro and Temari stared after them.
"I think we were just played." Temari said dully.
"Big time!" Naruto cheered, "Way ta go, Future Uzumaki's!"
"Godamnit!" Gaara growled.
-END OF FLASHBACK-
Hotaru finished making breakfast and set the table, snickering to herself as she dashed up the stairs.
First stop, of course, was Hajime's room. She tiptoed so that she was within seven feet of the bed…took a deeeeeeeeeeep breath…and LAUNCHED HERSELF INTO THE AIR!
"HAAAAAAAA-CHANNNNNNNNNNNN! GET OUTTA BED, RETARD!" Hotaru shrieked, bodyslamming her twin.
"GLUCK! HOTARU! YOU SLUT! GET YER FAT ASS OFFA ME!" He roared, heaving a pillow at her laughing, retreating form.
Next stop, Naruto, Lee and Shino's room. They all had managed to sleep through the racket Hotaru and Hajime had made (some ninjas huh?) and she decided to wake them up in a much gentler fashion (I.E. a pray bottle filled with water)
-sprtzsprtzsprtz-
"Yulgh! Why'm all soppy?" asked an all too innocent, not nearly awake Naruto.
"…" Shino merely wiped the water off his face, replaced his sunglasses and sat with his legs hanging over the edge of the bed, his head restinggroggily in his hands.
"Five more minutes…please Gai-sensei?" Lee begged sleepily.
"Nope. Sorry Lee-pea! Time to get a move on." Hotaru said cheerfully, "I expect you all dressed and downstairs in ten minutes and if you're not, I'm sending Ha-chan up to get you."
Next on the list, were the Suna-siblings. She tiptoed into their room and since she wanted to get a move on, she decided on a similar technique to what she had used on her brother (minus the bodyslamming).
She inhaled deeply… "WAKE UP YA LAZY BRATS!"
The Suna-siblings jerked awake, momentarily looking rather cute and cuddly with their eyes clogged with sleep.
Gaara however, who didn't sleep (naturally) just muttered, "No need to yell."
Hotaru merely grinned at him, "Be downstairs, dressed in the clothes I gave ya in ten…Paaannnnda-chan."
She darted from the room, leaving Gaara to wonder, "…Panda-chan?"
The teacher's room was last on her list. She was going to use a variation to the att-koff-technique she used on her twin.
She squatted down low…and began hopping from bed, making sure she stepped on each man.
-BOIYOINGBOIYOINGBOIYOINGGONKBOYOINGWOKBOYOINGBOIYOINGBOIYOINGBOK-
"GET UP, YA BUMS! ON YOUR FEET! UP! UP! UP!" She cried, not stopping til every man was full roused (NOT THAT WAY! GAWD your minds are sick!)
"Alright troops!" Hotaru declared, "Downstairs, dressed, ten minutes. Got it? Good!"
She did a backflip off of Gai's bed (where was situated) and sprinted out the door.
Her high pigtails bounced happily as she thumped down the stairs, Tanpopo on her heels.
The instant the two reached the kitchen, the little fox started tugging at Hotaru's socks, whining urgently.
Hotaru smiled, "No, I didn't forget about you."
She set down a plate of food for the young fox, who tore into it like he hadn't seen food for months.
Ten minutes later…
"Pass th' puffy, crunchy stuff!" Naruto cried through a mouthful of waffle.
"Ya mean cereal?" Hajime asked, eyebrow cocked.
"Whatever! Gimme!" Naruto said, hand extended.
"Another pancake, please." Lee asked loudly.
"More bacon!" Jiraiya boomed.
"These omlets! The overflow with the power of youth!" Gai (obviously)
"Uh…right. Pass the OJ." Hotaru asked Hajime, who willingly passed it.
"Milk please." Temari called.
A milk carton sailed her way, which she effortlessly caught.
"'nuther muffuh peese?" Kankuro asked through his third blueberry muffin.
Gaara silently chewed on a sausage link.
Hotaru stared at him, then grinned. Yep, Yuzurihayama would definitely loosen this kid up, and if it didn't, well then he should seek some serious professional help.
(Yuzurihayama means Evergreen Mountains!)
Gaara sneezed, "Damn weather." He muttered.
"Wow! It's an absolutely gorgeous day!" Hotaru said happily.
"Yeah, yeah." Kakashi grumbled, "Let's just get this over with."
"Could you possibly be any more negative?" Hajime asked in annoyance.
"He speaks the truth, my eternal rival." Gai sighed, "Even after Lady Hotaru was gracious enough to lend out the garb of her fallen father, you still show such ingratitude!"
"Sh-shut up." Kakashi grumbled, feeling Hotaru's smirk burning into the back of his head as she fully enjoyed this victory.
"Speaking of which, I'm glad everything fits okay." Hotaru said, sighing in relief, "I was a bit worried, what with our stature and all, especially with yours, Temari. Phew! Such a relief!"
Temari could see why she would be concerned. The Yuzurihayama girl's uniforms skirt was…well…short. Very short. It could easily be classified a miniskirt.
Temari now found herself the bearer of two new phobias: Strong gusts of wind, (every japanese high school girl's worst nightmare) and pervvy guys like Jiraiya (every japanese high school girls SECOND worst nightmare).
Gaara was now sulking big time. He didn't want to be here. He was dressed like a dork (or so he thought. he actually looked incredibly hot. You could tell by the way random girls on the street started blushing when they looked his way) and felt very vulnerable without his gourd of sand, which the twins had insisted he leave at home.
"How'd I get roped into this? He grumbled, kicking a stray pebble.
They were nearing the school gates when Hajime and Hotaru suddenly sighed.
"You guys wait here a sec." Hajime said dully.
"Why?" Naruto blinked.
"Because we have to deal with our daily dose of dummies." Hotaru sighed, flipping open her sword case and unsheathing Yunagi (see chapter1)
The two charged forward.
"Now…I'm curious." Shino murmured, following them despite their request (As did everyone else)
-RRRMMMBLLLRRMMMBBLLRMMMBLL-
"Whuh-what is this? An earthquake?" Lee cried. He shot Gaara a look, "Are you responsible for this?"
Gaara glared at the bowl-cut sporting lad, "No, you fool. Why would I-"
"There's your culprit!" Kakashi smiled (he's smiling again! Yay!), "Looks like those two inherited the Sasuke-gene."
The two were duking it out with a much lower class of fighter (but they made up for their bad fighting with their mass numbers)
"UZUMAKI!" A throng of female fighters cried, armed with metal poles, smiling spastically as they charged Hajime.
"IF WE DEFEAT YOU IN COMBAT-" a horde of boxers, Tai-Kwon-Do students and Football players declared as the rushed Hotaru.
"-YOU GO OUT WITH US!" They cried joyfully as they continued their assault.
-…pok…pokpokpok…-
-F-KAAMMMMM-
"SHUT IT, RETARDS!" Hajime shouted, punching his attackers and sending towards the heavens.
"GO TO TH' MALL AN' BUY YERSELVES SOME LIVES!" Hotaru yelled, sending her assailants skyward with a single kick.
The aggressors all plummeted to the ground.
"Ho-kay!" The Twins grinned, "NOW You can come in! Welcome to Yuzurihayama!"
(A/N: Ho-kay! They managed to get them TO the school inone piece (Monkey D. Luffy shows up from outta no where) ONE PIECE? WHERE? GET OUTTA MY FIC YA GUMMY LITTLE TURD! (WHAMMO!) Anyhoo, like I said, they managed to get them to Yuzurihayama safely, but what will happen once class STARTS? Suicidal EnglishTeachers, Sado-Masochist Math Prof.s, A gym teacher with a fetish for TUBE SOCKS? Let the melee begin. R&R!)