(A/N: Hiya! Lady Hiran here! Wow! That's all I can say! Wow! So many reviews! Because of all of you, this effed up mess shall continue! I'm so proud of alla yew! So without further adieu, READ ON!)
Hotaru sighed loudly, rolling off the bed at (clock check) eight 0' clock P.M.
She strolled quietly down the hall, the sounds of her Naruto and brother's laughter meeting her ears.
Zabuza and Haku's loud angry groans reached her ears as well as a triumphant whoop from her Great-grandfather as they continued their video game marathon in the family room.
The sound of Sasuke's frenzied footfalls as he ran from Itachi, who was chasing him around the main walkway outside the house, found her.
The surprisingly happy voice of Gaara and the kind reassuring voice of her Great-grandmother as they talked in the kitchen made their way to her sensitive eardrums.
-WHMP-
Hotaru staggered back and looked to see whom she had run into.
Her eyes narrowed when she saw it was Kakashi.
With a ferocious glare that would have killed lesser men, she turned on her heel and stormed down the hall.
Kakashi blinked.
That was it?
No beating?
No screaming at the top of her lungs?
Oh, man.
He must have made her REALLY mad this time.
He rubbed the lump on the back of his head and sighed.
"What to do?" he said aloud.
Kakashi strode into living room just as SOUTH PARK went on commercial.
"Hey, Hajime?" he asked, as he watched Naruto and Hajime wipe hysterical tears from their eyes, "You and that Kanna girl are together right?"
"Mm-hm." Hajime nodded, "Since junior high."
"Well, have you ever gotten into a fight with her?" Kakashi asked.
"Nope." Hajime shrugged, "She's waaaaaayy too mellow for that. Why?"
Kakashi slumped forward in exasperation.
"Never mind." He sighed as SOUTH PARK came back on.
Kakashi strode in the same general direction as Hotaru, picking up on her chakra.
Determined to apologize, he followed it to a room that had it's door closed and locked and quickly broke the door down.
"Hotaru, I'm sorr-"
"EEEEEYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Hortaru shrieked covering her chest with both arm and ducking under the water.
"This..." Kakashi just realized, "...isa bathroom."
...and Hotaru was in the middle of taking a bath.
Trying to cool her head.
"Uh oh." Kakashi said sheepishly.
In a fury, Hotaru grabbed the nearest towel, wrapped it around herself and splashed out of the tub.
"Ka-KA-SHIIII!" she snarled, "YOU-PER-VERT-ED-BAS-TARRRRRD!"
"I-I CAN EXPLAIN!" He stammered, backing himself into a corner.
"DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!" she roared.
-FWAK-BAK-BOK-WOK-KROK-GOK-KAK-WROK-GROK-FRAK-KONK-GONK-BONK-WONK-SMAK-WAK-WRAK-BONK-FWAK-BAK-BOK-WOK-KROK-GOK-KAK-WROK-GROK-FRAK-KONK-GONK-BONK-WONK-SMAK-WAK-WRAK-BONK-
Kakashi lay on the floor, steam rising from the heat of the new welts left by his hardcover copy of 'Come, Come Paradise'.
Hotaru stood over him, eyes glowing with malice, the offending weapon still in hand.
"Uzumaki School, Secret Jutsu; Asura's-Dance-of-Blades (see ch.9) combined with the Beatcha-With-A-Book-Corner-Technique: Type One! Book Corner Barrage!" Hotaru growled hurling the book at the back of Kakashi's head (it bounced off and landed next to him)
Hotaru then made sure to step on him as she exited the bathroom, forgetting all about her bath.
She stormed into her room, dressing quickly.
"That guy. That guy! WHY DID I HAVE TO FALL FOR THAT GUY?" She screamed into her bedding, beating the pillows with both fists.
(Authoress: Cuz it's my fic, and I'm a cold-blooded bitch! HA-HA!)
She stopped moving and lay there, motionless, exhausted from being so angry.
"Why?" She murmured, "Why that perverted bastard? I am really that desperate for human contact that I would fall for a lecher like him?"
(Authoress: Uh-DUUHHHHHHHH-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh! Ya gotta love Ling-Ling! And for those of you who don't watch Drawn Together, just let it go.)
She sat up and ran a hand roughly through her hair.
"Well...I'm still not apologizing." Hotaru scowled stubbornly, "I do not abide perversion! "
She glomped a pillow tightly under her chin.
"He has to apologize first." She grumbled into the pillow, "I won't speak to him again otherwise. I don't care how much I like him."
(Authoress: I don't really think it would be much of a loss on his part ya violent, crazy, crack whore.)
The next morning, Hajime awoke to find his ancestor's head on his chest.
"GLUH!" Hajime gasped, pushing the twelve-year old of him.
"...raaaaameeeennnnnn..." Naruto burbled sleepily, a drowsy grin on his face.
Hajime breathed a sigh of relief when he recalled that they had fallen asleep watching the Comedy Central SOUTH PARK Marathon.
He strolled into the kitchen when Izanami was making breakfast with Hotaru.
Haku and Zabuza were hunkered down over a video game strategy guide, alternating between shoving food in their mouths and turning the pages.
Sasuke was in the midst of a food fight with Itachi (not the fun kind, believe me) and had just managed to successfully land a hunk of crispy bacon in his elder sibling's left Magekyo Sharingan eye.
Hissing in pain, Itachi countered by hurling a spork (lzanami didn't trust him enough to give him an actual fork) at Sasuke's forehead, leaving a rather interesting marking.
Kakashi was deep in conversation with Amidamaru, discussing things that...well...really weren't appropriate to speak of at the breakfast table.
Hajime noticed the absentee from the group.
"Oi, where's Gaara?" He asked his Great-grandmother.
"Asleep." She said with a smile, "That boy is dead to the world. It would be cruel to wake him."
Hotaru and Hajime shared a panicked look.
"GEH?" they gaped, "A-ASLEEP? HE'S THE SHUKAKU'S JINCHURIKI! HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO SLEEP!" They screamed, flailing their arms wildly (waaaah! I hate the freaky twin thing! it's uber creepy!)
Izanami just smiled.
"Calm down." She said, "I gave the boy a set of seals just like yours, Hajime. There's nothing to worry about."
The Uzumaki Twins were about to continue their terror imposed rant, then stopped.
They closed their mouths...and blushed hotly.
"Oh." They squeaked, now hoping that they hadn't woken the boy.
Several hours later…
"Pshh…he's still asleep." Itachi growled.
Sasuke was currently hiding behind Izanami (human shield tactic) and wasn't particularly saddened by this news.
Naruto was in the living room, watching World's Wildest Police Chases with Hajime.
"GO! GEDDEM! GEDDEM! GEDDEM!" Naruto shouted.
Haku and Zabuza were back in the family room, attempting to defeat Amidamaru again.
"ACK! NOOO! DRAGON KICK! DRAGON KICK! DRAGON KICK!" Zabuza cried.
"AAAAAAAUGH! MY LIFE POINTS!" Haku sobbed.
"A…aawwnnnn. I could do this allllll day, boys." Amidamaru snickered.
Kakashi was thinking up a good way to apologize on the external walkway.
"Uh…hey! Hotaru? I'm sorry, y'know?" he said sheepishly to a support beam," No, no. That's not right."
Hotaru walked down the hall to collect Gaara and happened to hear Kakashi.
She peeked out the door to see what he was doing.
"Be direct, Kakashi! Direct!" he berated himself, "Hotaru? I'm sorry.Yeah! Just like that!"
"Just like what?" Hotaru asked shrewdly from behind him, making the jounin jump several feet in the air.
Kakashi gulped when he saw the cool stare and the complacent smirk on her lips.
"Well?" she asked again, folding her arms.
Glaring fiercely, he strode over to where Hotaru leaned against the doorframe.
"Listen you!" He growled, "What happened yesterday was an accident, plain and simple!"
Hotaru's eyes widened in stunned annoyance.
She could not believe his nerve.
"But none the less…" he continued, "I apologize."
Kakashi began to sweat as Hotaru moved away from the doorway and began to walk away in silence.
She looked back at him.
"Accepted." Hotaru muttered, before striding down the hall.
Hotaru thanked every deity she knew of that she had managed to escape and concealy the fire engine red blush that was widespread on her face.
She pushed the door to Gaara's room open.
"Panda-chan? You awake?" She asked softly, face still burning slightly.
"…zzz…zzzz…zz…zzzz…"
"Phweee…" Hotaru sighed walking over to the bed and watching Gaara as he slept (for real this time ((see ch.16)) )
"I hate to do this, Panda-chan." She said ruefully, "But I'm out of options."
"Hotaru! Whadd're you doin'?" Hajime screeched as his elder twin tiptoed into the room, Gaara bundled in a blanket like an overgrown baby in her arms (still asleep)
"SHHH!" Hotaru hissed, "This is the best I could come up with! I'll sling him over my shoulder and the rest should be hunky dory!"
"Should be?" Hajime asked incredulously.
"Just round up everybody, jackass!" she whispered fiercely.
Twenty minutes later…
-FWASH-
-fyuuuu…-
-uuuuuuu…-
-BMMM-
"Owch…those landings never get any better!" Naruto hissed.
Sasuke smirked victoriously (he landed on top of Itachi, effectively knocking him unconscious)
The others groaned in pain and clamored to their feet.
"SASUKE-KUN!"
-WHMP-
-GLOM-
"I was so worried about you!" Sakura cried, looking up at Sasuke, face pale, thin from having not eaten, "Are you okay?"
Sasuke found his hand moving on it's own.
He patted her head.
"Dummy." He muttered.
This caused Sakura to break down and cry (...weird girl)
Naruto saw this and found that he really didn't care; he was just happy for Sakura.
"N-Naruto-kun?"
He saw a very nervous, obviously happy Hinata, standing a few feet away from him.
"You are back." she said, smiling slightly.
Naruto felt as though the curtains were opened within his mind.
It was so obvious.
Hinata!
She'd always been there hadn't she? (…wow. you're quick.)
Naruto walked over to a pleasantly surprised Hinata and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek (if you blinked you would have missed it)
"Yup!" he grinned, "Good to be back!"
Hinata turned a bright tomato red.
While all this occurred, The Sunagakure Siblings rushed over in a panic st the sight of their sibling sleeping.
"GAAAAAH!" Kankuro yelled, "We're dead! Dead! DEAD!"
"WHAT DID WE DO WRONG?" Temari screamed.
Gaara stirred and sat up woozily.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!" The elder siblings screamed, "PLEASE DON'T KILL US!"
"Could you keep it down?" Gaara asked drowsily, "I'm trying to sleep."
Temari blinked.
Kankuro blinked.
"Uh…" Kankuro gaped.
"Sure." Temari said, more than a little stunned that her little brother was still in control.
"Thankssss…" Gaara said as he fall backward, asleep again.
"Well…he does have a lotta hours to catch up on." Kankuro remarked.
"That's for damn sure." Temari agreed.
Kakashi spotted Iruka and was about to go over and give the man a noogie when he felt a slight tug on his sleeve.
He looked down.
Ice blue eyes stared up at him.
"Kakashi?" Hotaru said softly, "We need to talk."
(A/N: What does Hotaru need to talk to Kakashi about? Will Hajime ever get to finish his show? And will this plot line ever make sense? DREAM ON! R&R!)