Chapter 11: Troublesome - or the long-awaited Nara interlude

Summary: In which Shikaku fights for Kara-chan and is overwhelmed with the impossibility of one little girl managed to achieve.

Well, that had not gone exactly to plan; of course, Shikaku was more aware than most that most plans didn't survive first contact because some variable inevitably changed. In his initial plan, Shikaku had intended to do some subtle observations by enlisting her jonin sensei (read: abusing his authority and commanding them) to take up the Nara babysitting mission and finding out more about her that way. One of his relatives or himself would have dropped in, and he would have gotten a bit clearer a picture of the Nara puzzle at long last.

Instead, however, he had first been forced to argue against Fugaku (urgh, so troublesome) who had some fairly convincing arguments on his side whereas Shikaku could only say on his end that she was interesting and that any Nara would even be happy to be her sensei (he'd force Ensui to do it, if need be). Now, what was surprising, was that the Hokage had buckled and backed him – not that he was ungrateful, but it was definitely unexpected. Fugaku's arguments had been convincing, with evidence on his side and Shikaku only had his curiosity and nothing to refute the Fugaku's suspicions. Puzzling then, that the Hokage had agreed with him instead of the Uchiha.

He had planned to talk it over with Fugaku over drinks after, but work had interfered when his assistant alerted him that Genma was overdue and had yet to return to Konoha from what should have been an easy infiltration mission. Luckily, Tsume had been more than happy to send one of her clansmen out in the vicinity and see if they could track him, together with one of the Hyuga branch members. By the time he had finished up at the office, Shikaku hadn't had time for anything but heading home, kissing his family and going to bed.

As it turned out, Kara was older than they had thought – an easy enough mistake, Shikaku had thought, until he realised it meant someone graduated even though they lacked basic knowledge about the shinobi wars.

But still, putting her up under Aburame Satoshi was a bit harsh – the kid wouldn't even get a fair shot; or, indeed, any shot.

As it turned out, the boy originally slated to be on that team had been accepted by their jonin sensei. Kara had been forced into the genin corps.

That… complicated things.

There was a misconception among civilians – and genin, quite often – that a jonin commander was to be understood literally and in command of jonin only. They never could answer as to why there was no genin commander or chunin commander.

A jonin commander in Konoha was the same as a head shinobi in Kumo. Shikaku was a jonin by title only and second in command after the Hokage. He watched over the genin, chunin and jonin, including the genin corps through Sakai-san. One-on-one interaction with genin or chunin was, however, rare, as their roles were usually fairly clearly defined. A jonin, however, could be placed anywhere at anytime and that required Shikaku to have current knowledge of their skills, weaknesses, chakra, jutsu and their mental state.

There was a reason Kakashi refused to rejoin the normal corps; Shikaku would have forced him into months of therapy before he could even think of taking on a mission. The assassinations he was running were not what Minato had intended for him when he put him in there. ANBU was supposed to be a way to keep him under Minato's direct supervision as Hokage.

Shikaku had appealed several times to the Hokage to have Kakashi released back into the jonin corps, but the kid was very skilled at his job – and they were short of manpower after the Kyubi attack. Despite the 2 years which had elapsed since, and his periodic requests, Sarutobi continued to refuse to let Kakashi leave unless he himself petitioned for it.

Shikaku knew that would never happen – the kid had been indoctrinated since he was young, was far too dead-set on never failing his mission or his comrades. Kakashi would only ever leave when he was dead. The boy was now, what, 16? 17? His mental health should be taking priority, but Shikaku probably knew better than most that Sarutobi, who had reigned during war, was a lot more cut-throat and dispassionate than most people would like to believe. As long as Kakashi was useful – and that boy gave his everything to ANBU, despite the exhaustion he must be feeling – he would not be taken out of the corps unless Sarutobi found a better use for him elsewhere.

Assassinations were not even the best skill Kakashi had, despite it making up most of his mission rota since he entered ANBU. His tracking and infiltration skills were second to none, whereas his Sharingan and low chakra reserves did not lend themselves for missions which required heavy engagement or prolonged fighting. And he was far too recognisable; his white chakra, one Sharingan eye, silver hair – Kakashi was being used as a symbol rather than being allowed to hide in the corps.

Most days, Shikaku wished he knew if there was something more he could do for the teenager; Minato would have had Sarutobi's head if he knew what they were doing to his student (adopted son? Minato had been rather young, but on the other hand, he had stepped in and tried his best to raise the kid and bragged about him non-stop).

It took a few weeks to work things out with Sakai-san, but it had only made him more interested in proceeding with his new plan. Sakai had advised him that during his usual welcoming speech, he had unleashed a bit of killing intent to impress the importance onto the newbies of behaving, but Kara had been not only unimpressed, but apparently largely unaware of this. This had also been confirmed separately by Satoshi when he handed in his paperwork with an analysis and impression of the team he had been assigned. Very curious indeed.

But it got even better – her first week had been at the hospital but an ANBU team had just been brought in with severe injuries. The nurse who had, apparently, explained the mission assignment to little Kara had been under the impression that she had already been briefed and therefore given her very little information.

Shikaku had immediately classified the incident, but at least three people at the hospital (the junior nurse, the nearby receptionist who had alerted the head nurse of the incident when the junior nurse had gossiped about the uselessness of the genin corps and the head nurse herself) were curious about Kara as well – somehow that girl had destroyed a poison which had killed two ANBU rather quickly. The girl didn't appear to have had any of the safety equipment – at least the hospital one had remained untouched. Yet the contact-poison did not kill her or even make her sick. The poison the hospital had developed which had been released into the air didn't appear to have had any effect either (bleeding eyes were a fairly noticeable sign).

Every time he found out more about that little girl, she threw up more question marks and not a single answer – at least none which made sense. Shikaku only grew more invested in making this work. He would insist on finally getting some answers.

Shikamaru had just begun teething and Yoshino was at the end of her wits (as was Shikaku, to be honest, and he was at the office more often than not). Not ideal to get more information on her, but maybe he'd at least get a little more information, and if not, some respite for Yoshino at least.

The deer pellet mission was there specifically for her; clansmen would have usually picked it up on their way, but he wanted Kara to do it. Sakai-san would have instructed his mission desk to turn anyone else who volunteered for the mission away.

When the messenger arrived, it was half an hour behind when he'd expected her to be there (apparently, she had already completed four other missions that day, which, fair enough; he had only factored in time enough for three). Sakai-san had been kind enough to use a messenger to inform him she'd taken the mission (undoubtedly charged to him; his subordinate had definitely not been impressed with the setup he had planned). Still, Yoshino would not be happy with the extra wait.

Now, Shikaku was certain Kara was no spy and having heard of the younger children she had been in charge of at the orphanage, as well as interactions with Academy students, the worst he expected was aloofness and unfamiliarity. Nevertheless, he used one of the protection tags Kushina had made in droves shortly before her death and which she had freely handed out to any new parents she was friends with and advised Yoshino to activate it before handing over their son.

"He's gonna be a little Uzumaki, 'ttebane, and we are trouble magnets. So, this little seal? Protects him from any physical or chakra attack for about, er, three hours? Maybe? Anyway, no way my little Naru-chan is gonna get kidnapped on my watch! Here, have some. I've got about three hundred of these now. Not that anyone wants one of you lazy people – all you do is sleep, dattebane!"

Kushina, eight and a half months pregnant, eyes narrowed, pointing at him and hair floating behind her slightly, should have been a fearsome sight – but Shikaku just sighed. Her hair had not split – she wasn't actually angry, just her usual hyper-active, emotional self.

"Ah, Kushina, remember I'm Hokage now. I don't think you're supposed to say that to one of the clan heads under my command, love," Minato told her cautiously.

Then her hair split and Shikaku knew it was high time to escape.

"What did you say to me, dattebane?" Kushina's voice had gone lower, more threatening.

Yes, definitely not staying for this. Taking a hold of the sealing tags she had shoved into his hands (done by an actual Uzumaki, a priceless rarity these days), Shikaku intoned a sarcastic, "by your leave, Hokage-sama" with a half-bow to his panicking Yondaime and shunshined out quickly without waiting for actual permission.

Minato had never really gotten better at learning how to speak to Kushina; it was rather amusing how clumsy he still was – even Shikaku knew not to argue with a highly pregnant woman, especially not if they were your wife. And never ever if they were also a highly volatile Uzumaki who is also a Jinchūriki.

For his own wellbeing, Yoshino was unaware of his manipulations, of course. He had no intention of telling her their son was, well, bait, however safely, for a quest for more information on one of his puzzles. If she found out, he'd be lucky not to get poisoned the next time she made him a bento, and that would be one of the more peaceful deaths he had come up with.

Yes, Shikaku had made a list of likely responses his wife would have if she were to ever find out; just to make sure the risk was worth the potential reward… It was, he needed to get more data!

He came home before the two-hour window was up, just to be on the safe side and stood by the fence contemplating how to proceed from here as he talked distractedly to Kiyoshi. Shikaku could just walk in, of course, pretend to ask where the rest of her team was. But if she ever found out his position, which was not unlikely at this point, she'd know he'd played her, at least partly.

The other response was slightly more despicable given she was ten years old and doing a job he'd set her up to take, but he'd done far worse before. Once she left his son's bedroom, he quickly finished his conversation with the guard (another interesting puzzle piece – was that really how her bag operated? If so, did she know seals? Her parents?) and shunshined into his house, turning the light off so when she stepped into the living room, it was pitch black.

Shikaku used the shadows to control her movements and freeze her into place, before holding a kunai to her throat. He questioned her and could feel her panicking, her pulse rabbiting under his hand by her neck, sweating, but her voice was steady, her chakra forcibly calm. With one hand he created a clone to check on his son, just to be safe, and to remove the protection tag.

Good, she was steady even with adrenaline rushing through her and in a potentially dangerous situation. Keeping a cool head and agile mind was a rare thing, especially in an untrained new genin – very handy thing for missions. Interesting and unexpected but not suspicious. But so very, very interesting.

He took the kunai away from her throat before releasing his hold on her.

No need for her to try and jerk away and accidentally cut her own throat open; that would be a fun one to try and explain. Not.

Shikaku stepped to the side and turned the lights back on. The little girl had barely grown since he last saw her, and he was still surprised to find she was ten years old. If he didn't have evidence from neighbours and friends to corroborate it, he would've thought she'd made it up to be seen as older than she was.

Kara was tiny for her age, both in height and mass. The new clothes only emphasised that she was thin, too thin, but not too surprising.

The orphanages had been hit hard after the Kyubi attack. Food had to be sourced and shinobi were prioritised over civilians, civilian merchants and anyone even remotely important to the economy over orphaned children. So food had been scarce and while some of the orphans had fought over resources and bullied for larger portions, some had also shared their already small portions with others. Shikaku wouldn't be surprised to find Kara among them.

And she had weird scars. The one on her forehead presumably from a bad cut during the Kyubi attack (although an odd shape, a tiny scarred-over zigzag on her forehead). Kara also had the usual scars on her fingers all shinobi had but had swapped her usual cloth bandage for gloves on her hands.

Something to hide? There was Iwa's explosion corps with those mouths on their hands, but unlikely given what he already knew. What else could she be hiding on her hands, though?

There was also the beginning of a scar on the inside of her forearm – it looked like a long cut.

Question was, was it deliberate? Suicide? Injuries from the Kyubi attack – maybe an object had falling down and she'd lifted her arm to protect herself? It looked like a knife from the little he could see, a deep cut. Didn't seem quite as jagged as he would have expected from an uneven object.

The little girl collapsed onto the hard floor underneath her at his hard voice and he winced internally. He was used to interaction with jonin and probably should've toned it down somewhat for a genin.

Her green eyes were just as vibrant as they had been the last time he saw her, but she didn't look quite so sorrowful anymore.

New friends? Family? Something good happen? She was in genin corps, usually kids felt more dejected and abandoned – not to mention disillusioned. Seriously, where were these kids getting the idea that they would be rescuing princesses? What were they teaching them at the Academy these days.

And then Shikaku was amused.

The moment the girl had made eye contact, she had gotten flustered, blushed and avoided eye contact as much as she could.

A crush, how cute and absolutely adorable.

Although he hoped she'd grow out of this phase soon. There was being attracted to dangerous men – which was most shinobi – and those who threatened you. Less unusual than he liked, but still that was not the basis of a good or healthy relationship.

Anyway, at the moment the girl was ten years old and wouldn't have to worry about such things for a good few years yet. A lot of time to grow out of it.

And she was so adorable, too, shyly avoiding his eyes, cheeks a deep red. He felt the urge to pat her head and coo… Hm… was that the effect of raising a child himself or should he arrange a meeting with his Yamanaka therapi- teammate, he meant teammate. Boy, he really needed to watch that. Inoichi told him often enough he was a friend, not his therapist, no need to accidentally tell him about it.

And then Kara started stuttering and he couldn't help but be amused at how flustered she was. So adorable. Like a little fawn stalking on unsteady legs and looking for attention. So cute.

He focused on her and raised an eyebrow when Kara mentioned his wife, curious to see what she'd say. Impressively, the new member of the genin corps didn't outright tell him his wife had dropped their son on her and run away as if she had been chased by hellhounds (although the implication was definitely there, still props for attempting to be diplomatic).

Nevertheless, when prompted by her, he looked over the evidence left behind

Yep, that was his wife's note, Shikamaru had eaten, even – lucky! There had been some food on the ceiling just yesterday after their latest attempt to make him eat when he refused to. Shikaku didn't even know anymore – he was certain chakra hadn't been involved but that food had definitely lodged itself very firmly in the ceiling and he'd been forced to wall-walk to clean up.

He probably should sign the note – she had delivered the pellets after all, but decided to check everything just to be pedantic. Huh. One of the bags had been opened – they were a long-standing customer; this had never happened before.

Had she opened it then? Why? For what purpose?

And then it came, the largest surprise yet.

Kara said she opened the bag to feed the deer.

Not tried or attempted to, but to feed the deer.

It still didn't make sense, not matter how many times Shikaku turned around in his head, took the sentence apart and tried again.

And we? Shikamaru and her?

Shika-kun hadn't even been introduced to the deer yet – Nara usually waited until they were three years old and a bit more in control of themselves for a gentle introduction (plus, not screaming down the house with their teething).

This was especially important considering that Shikamaru was heir to the clan and if Shikaku wanted his son to become the next clan head, he had needed the introduction to go well.

The clan heir – and next head of clan – needed to be accepted by both the shadows and the deer. Shika-kun hadn't been ready yet.

Or so he had thought. But it just couldn't be possible, wasn't possible, right?

On top of all that, only the clan head could introduce new members; the parents could obviously be there, but the clan head needed to lead the introduction to Rikumaru.

What she said wasn't possible. Categorically, irrefutably wasn't possible.

Attempts had been made before Konoha's inception – back when the clan head had died and the heir was but a child, but the deer had made their displeasure rather well known. A few more attempts had been made since (even the occasional Nara attempting to usurp the clan head, but that was rather rare, luckily; too much paperwork and too little motivation – plus, what reward was there, really?).

"You," he pointed at her, second eyebrow joining the first, "went out to the forest with my son," he paused again, analysing her facial expressions "and fed the deer?"

While kind of her to think of the deer potentially starving and seeking to rectify it, what she was proposing wasn't possible; it just wasn't.

Shikaku wasn't even exaggerating. It really wasn't possible.

He really was getting stuck on this. His mind just couldn't get past the mental block in his mind.

The deer weren't just average deer – although the occasional one joined here and there, but they were more intelligent and had chakra; like a summons, except they lived in his realm and couldn't be summoned. They lived longer, too. Rikumaru had been the stag when Shikaku was a young boy. Stags lived on average 18 years – but this one wasn't even showing signs of aging, at least none that Shikaku could detect.

The deer would, however, defend this land and the Nara from intruders to their death – as they had done before. There had been a few incidents where different clan members had spotted enemy shinobi being devoured by the shadows, leaving no trace of their existence behind. Unfortunately, no one could ascertain for sure as to whether it was the deer themselves or the forest.

The deer had always been suspiciously close by at every incident and they did have chakra. Clan records had records of incidents just like these ones even during the warring clan era – so they knew it wasn't the forest, as they had obviously moved into Konoha later, but the deer had come with them.

On the other hand, civilians and quite a few clans believed that the Nara shadow technique was not a kekkai genkai – that anyone with high enough yin chakra could do what they did.

They were partially right but also couldn't have been more wrong. You did need a higher ratio of yin to yang chakra, that much was true. And people who joined the clan, could learn their jutsu, if the clan head approved – but it was at a risk.

Their clan had a saying – don't look too deeply into the abyss, for it also looks into you (A/N: Friedrich Nietzsche, of course, but fits so well here – sorry, not sorry). Poor (delusional) Inoichi thought it was a saying about going too far, like ANBU, and becoming a cold-blooded killer; Choza, on the other hand, had always been perceptive when everyone least expected, and from his uneasy glances towards their forest on occasion, had discerned that it meant something else to Nara. Needless to say, Choza was right.

The shadows were semi-sentient, if any non-Nara attempted it, they would likely disappear never to be seen again. However, married-in partners, under the guidance of the clan head and their partner, could attempt to learn, as long as they were prepared for potential repercussions. Shikaku was well-versed enough in the shadows, one of the best in the clan, and could probably interrupt quickly enough for them not to lose anything. But it was a gamble, and they could lose part of their extremities or even entire limbs, depending on how unsuitable the shadows thought them to be and how fast Shikaku could respond.

That's why they were always vetted extensively before any attempt was made. Reaching out to take control of the shadows, that was where the danger lay. Anyone could be bound, strangled or otherwise interacted with and the shadows did just as bid by the person controlling them without any assessment or feedback. But controlling them?

Yes, there was a reason they had the warning.

The deer were even more picky, if possible. Yoshino, for example, could not even go into the vicinity of the forest for fear of having teeth snapped or hooves kicking out at her. They never actually hit, but they made it rather clear that she was unwelcome. Most of the married-in partners didn't qualify; hell, some Nara had even been ignored entirely by the deer (Rikumaru had literally turned his back and the rest had followed suit).

So far, no Nara had been able to discern a reason for their acceptance or refusal, no criteria seemed in common between them; it appeared entirely arbitrary, but everyone knew there must be a commonality everyone had missed so far. It was one of the most often rehashed puzzles in-clan, rife with speculation (and gossip). Shikaku doubted it would be discovered in his lifetime.

Therefore, he must have misunderstood something.

Or Kara had.

None of the deer would have taken food from a stranger who wasn't part of their clan.

"…Yes? I am sorry, I wasn't sure. I'll repay what we used, Nara-sama," Kara said hastily as he was still analysing her, putting his entire focus on figuring out where the hell the misunderstanding was.

The deer wouldn't even have accepted Shikamaru's introduction without him there (would the protection seal have protected him from the deer?). And she should have been bitten, kicked or devoured (Sakai-san would have lynched him!).

…

Argh, he would have to ask Shikamaru tomorrow. This was clearly not helpful and he kept getting stuck on how inexplicable this was if it were true – and part of him believed her for what reason would she have to lie if he could find out easily from his son? And he was definitely not disclosing clan secrets to her just to get an explanation he could get from his son.

On that note – wasn't his son surprisingly quiet? Lately, he snuffled and whined even in his sleep and periodically woke up with the pain (and his parents with his screams, not a pleasant wake-up call hearing your child whimper and scream in pain).

He waived her offer of repayment away, not interested in the least; and he wasn't cold-hearted enough to demand payment even if she had accidentally ripped the bag and spilled some of the pellets.

Shikaku was amused to hear Kara breathe out quietly when he turned his attention elsewhere. The little puzzle-girl was really quite adorable. If he were less busy and had more time at home, he might have offered to adopt her. She seemed to have a good hand with little Shikamaru, was interesting, clever and kind, as far as he could tell. And she had a good head on her shoulders, kept cool and calm in dangerous situations, which was a skill Nara valued highly.

"Name's Shikaku-san, not Nara-sama. Thank you for taking care of Shikamaru, even though you hadn't been assigned the mission," he told her, curious to see what her reaction would be. He was a clan head and had, not so subtly, insinuated that he could be in her debt.

"Oh, not to worry," the little girl said, "your son was a delight. He is adorable and very clever; you should be proud."

Well, either she was genuinely that unconcerned and kind, or that offer went straight over her head. Or both; that was also an option.

Shikaku offered her a wry smile, feeling the scars pull slightly on the right side of his face, charmed against his will by Kara's insouciance and clear love for his son; something they definitely had in common.

He barely stopped himself from laughing out loud when she whimpered and sank right back down to the floor. Definitely adorable and she didn't know how close she was to being adopted by him.

Shikaku offered her the prepared lie about having forgotten to put in a mission request, rubbing his neck as if uncomfortable about confessing his shortcomings to a genin. Misdirection and lies were literally some of the first things shinobi learned, but he doubted Kara had even guessed or suspected any lies in what he told her. She seemed rather disconcertingly straightforward and honest; great thing in a client, notably less so, however, in a shinobi, whose job often relied on it.

"And, well, as soon as I remembered," Shikaku continued with his lie, "I rushed here, but it looked like you had it all in hand," he paused slightly here, "Kara-chan."

He wondered if she realised that she had never introduced herself to him – only to the gate guard, and yet he knew her name. And Shikaku wondered if she recognised him as the man who had been there to see her train in the forest (well, initially he'd come to make sure a hapless genin didn't accidentally enter the clan forest, of course).

Aww, adorable. Right back to blushing and being wide-eyed, avoiding eye contact. So cute. Definitely a little fawn; if only all genin were this adorable rather than the little bratty menaces he often heard about.

… Maybe they should swap missions for genin teams with those for genin corps; maybe it would do them all a load of good?

Yeah, nah, the clans and council would never allow it, but it still amused Shikaku to imagine one of the clan brats shovelling his way through a sewer.

Back to task, he reminded himself. The tiny genin has completed six missions today; no matter how interesting the puzzle, that is not an excuse to allow him to override their wellbeing. Little Kara did look very tired.

"I'll organise the mission pay for both for you tomorrow. Thanks for staying late, go home now, genin-san," he instructed.

The little girl bowed to him and then thanked him and walked away quickly, just short of running to escape him.

It really was entertaining. Maybe he and Sakai-san should swap duties for a bit; this looked like it would be a lot more fun.

But at the very least, Shikaku would have to make sure to pay her for a solo C-rank mission for taking care of his son.

And potentially braving death by feeding their deer; would that make it a B- or an A-rank mission? How did one rank deer? He had definitely received reports of enemy jonin being the ones devoured. Pity they couldn't claim the bounty, however it ironically had only served to enhance Nara reputation – their enemies set out to destroy them and disappeared, not to ever be seen or heard from again; Nara, they say, perfect assassins, never see them coming. Which was true enough, but not actually what happened on these occasions. Not that they would ever correct them, but still.

Shikaku wondered what had happened during his pre-planned babysitting ambush and what Shikamaru thought of the little girl babysitting him. She really was too small; his son had been around 86 cm tall last time he measured him whereas she was around 128 cm tall. He wasn't even sure how she had carried him about, but then again, she was training as a shinobi. Even if it didn't look like there was muscle mass, she must have some. As far as he knew, at least; she'd been training rather diligently last time he saw her, after all.

And, curiously, Shikamaru was still silent. Worried again, Shikaku checked on his son for a second time, but found him sleeping just as silently and deeply as before.

Maybe a good sign and coincidence it happened when Kara was here that the pain went away? There was no way that little girl knew or had a way of taking his son's pain away, right? She wouldn't have drugged him, would she? Maybe she'd meant well but given him adult painkillers or something like that?

Worried, he created a shadow clone with the instruction to watch over his son all night. That would be a headache for in the morning (literally). For now, he could finally get some rest himself. Kara had seemed like a conscientious girl. Nothing to worry about, Shikaku was sure.

It was the blinding headache that woke him in the morning and his mood plummeted accordingly. He'd slept in fits and starts, imagining issues with his son, deer injuring him and shadows devouring the little girl who had looked at him with adoration and puppy love. The girl he'd set up to babysit and which had nearly gone wrong in ways he could never have envisioned.

They hadn't talked to Shikamaru about shadows or deer yet – he was too young. He wouldn't understand some of the concepts, like death, so they'd put it off. It hadn't seemed time-critical or important – until now, that is.

Walking past his son's bedroom (his shadow clone had watched all night and not noticed anything awry), he easily let himself up and picked his sleepy son up and carried him downstairs.

If Yoshino had been here, he would have needed to insist on waking him up, but as it was, he could just continue sleeping against his shoulder while Shikaku prepared breakfast. Luckily, being on a team with Choza – or, most likely any Akimichi, meant he was an adequate chef. Ever since the first time Choza had injured his arm and been unable to take over cooking duty, both Inoichi and Shikaku had really improved on their cooking skills.

Not entirely voluntarily, he would have to add. But having an annoyed Akimichi looking over your every move and correcting you with every breath

No, not that way – that's cut way too uneven, this won't cook at the same rate now! – More salt! I said you should season it – too much, a pinch, I said, of basil. Do you even know what that is? – you're doing that wrong – have you never cooked before? – no, see, you're not stirring properly!

So, yes, thank you very much, Shikaku was a rather adequate cook. And he was grateful – kind of, at least, for Choza's teaching. It was still annoying how every time he went into the kitchen, he could hear his friend's nagging in his head and correcting him at every step. Inoichi and him occasionally commiserated over how even a decade later, they still could not cook without the mental image of Choza just behind them, looking over their shoulder.

But at least it meant he could occasionally surprise his wife with some home-cooked meals for date nights. And he could make a nice breakfast for himself and his son in the morning when his wife was out sleeping at a friend's house.

Slouching down onto his seat, Shikaku easily arranged himself to allow his son to sit between his legs and lean against him. While Shikamaru could eat by himself, he needed some prodding to finish his food (a fight his parents lost more often than not) especially since he started teething.

Shikaku prodded him gently awake, stroking his head and shoulder until his son slowly blinked awake.

"Hmmm?" His little boy looked around the dining room, the food and then his position before tilting his head back to look up at him. Shikaku watched the rather slow scan of the room with amusement.

"Mum away still?"

"Yes," Shikaku agreed.

"Where's my babysitter?"

This time, Shikaku did raise an eyebrow. Maybe they hadn't gotten along after all, if he was asking after his babysitter.

"Ensui's still out on a mission, as is Ryoko. I'm sure they'll be back soon," Shikaku assured his son. He hadn't known he'd bonded so well with either of them.

"No, not them," Shikaku watched in amusement as his son clumsily waved his hand, discarding the two people mentioned as completely irrelevant to his inquiry.

"The girl, yesterday. Where is she?" Shikamaru asked, not even making any move to touch his food.

"Ah," Shikaku drawled out; so, they had gotten along after all. That was a relief. He would have hated to have first conned her into the job and then leave a note on her file about a job she hadn't even intended or known about. "You mean Kara-chan?"

Yes, having a child definitely influenced him, Shikaku thought with amusement as he watched his son mouth her name to himself a few times.

"Now let's eat some breakfast, son," he reminded Shikamaru gently, holding out the child-sized chopsticks to him which had a small connector in the middle to make it easier for their clumsy tiny hands.

"No," Shikamaru reiterated, brows furrowed, "Need Kara-chan's toy." A pause and then his son self-corrected, facial expression this time one of consternation. "I need the toy Kara-chan gave me."

It was cute how he was trying to articulate himself in complete sentences.

"Mah, can't it wait until after breakfast?"

At his son's headshake, Shikaku contemplated for a moment enforcing discipline – Yoshino was of the opinion, once you sat down, there was no getting back up. This was family time.

On the other hand, that sounded like a very troublesome argument with a toddler, more food on the ceiling and unlike himself, his son had slept through the night.

Shikamaru would definitely win.

With a barely held-in sigh, Shikaku stood back up and mourned his food getting cold, even as he rearranged his son on his hip so he could hold onto his shirt.

"Alright, in your bedroom then?"

Without waiting for his son's nod, he was already making his way there.

After opening the door and scanning the bed, Shikaku spotted what his son was pointing at.

Well, then.

How had little Kara-chan come upon such a suspiciously perfect gift for his son? Really, a deer? Had he misread her, after all? Had she either been informed or somehow found out where she would be sent? Or had she carried this in her bag just for the opportunity to get in good with the clan head's family? Maybe her training near their forest when she had been younger had not been an innocent move after all, but a well-gauged and calculated move to attract his attention. Fuck, was she an infiltrator after all?

With a quick hand sign, a water clone appeared (better to absorb impact from any explosions or disperse any kind of force, really, than a shadow clone – took less chakra too, but no memory retention and only simple instructions).

Shikamaru had gone very quiet and still at his actions, looking more awake and analysing, clearly, what his father had perceived that he hadn't.

It only took a moment before the water clone gave a sharp nod and handed the toy over. His clone then left to disperse in the bathroom (drawing water out of the air was one thing – turning it back into water, yeah, no, Shikaku was good, but not that good).

Alright, normal toy then. No seals or sign of anything awry. Just a toy to get in good with the clan, then? Or a coincidence?

So, so many questions. Little Kara-chan was so young yet elicited more questions than Shikaku had had for many infiltrators.

So troublesome and but so very interesting.

"Here," Shikaku finally said, handing the toy onto his son now that he had deemed it harmless, making his way back to the kitchen.

Shikamaru bit the toy and he barely withheld a grimace, watching him; except as he watched the tiny tension around his forehead and shoulders relaxed and his son slouched against him.

Until now, Shikaku had forgotten how often his son used to slouch – since he started teething, his entire body was often tensed up; he hadn't realised it was there this morning as Shikamaru had borne it silently, but the difference was obvious.

Shikaku was still thinking of how to phrase his question when they situated themselves back at the dining table, and his son answered without even being asked.

"It takes away the pain, tou-san."

That-

Shikaku quickly flashed through the hand signs for the iryo ninjutsu allowing him to check his son's chakra levels – unaffected.

He released a breathless huff.

But of course. Another impossibility.

He'd like to say it was another puzzle piece but at the moment, Shikaku was half-certain that each clue was for an entirely new puzzle and whatever he had found out so far, didn't actually relate to each other.

A toy which could somehow accomplish what the trained medic nin at the hospital had assured him they could not.

Iryo ninjutsu required the careful removal of any element from one's own chakra; few people understood why. It was because the chakra would be introduced into another person's body – and, more than that, it would draw on small amounts of that person's own chakra. Not normally an issue – unless they were critically low (looking at you, here, Kakashi) or a small child, like his son, whose chakra system was still developing.

So, how had a small child not only had a toy solution on her just when needed, but also had managed what trained staff had not?

There was no seal, or indeed any chakra, in the toy.

"Ah, Shika-chan, may I?"

His son pulled a face – probably partly in reaction to using -chan, instead of -kun (but his son was so cute and expressive still; Shikaku knew he wouldn't remain that way for long, not in this career, so he'd enjoy it as long as he could), but also because he seemed to fear it would be taken away. Understandable, teething seemed terribly uncomfortable; Shikaku was glad he couldn't remember going through it himself. Childhood amnesia was a fortunate thing indeed – although he wondered just how much Kakashi remembered. That kid always seemed to remember and know a little more than he should.

"I'll give it right back," he promised and his son finally relinquished his hold on the toy he had been gnawing on still with a rebellious look at him.

There was a strand of drool connecting the toy to his son's mouth.

Delightful.

With a look to his son and a wipe across Shika-kun's mouth, he took a closer look at the animal. Then, after a moment of hesitation, he gently bit on one of the legs, ignoring the judgemental side-eye from his son at the action.

Huh.

The headache he'd received from several hours' worth of memories from his shadow clone this morning dissipated, along with the faintest ache on his face from his scars, the bad knee from an old injury he'd received during the war and the ache in his lower back from days spent behind his desk.

That… was nothing short of miraculous.

He handed it back to Shikamaru.

The real question was, did Kara-chan know just how valuable what she gave away was? Was it a bribe? Trying to buy favour? If so, that would be one hell of a favour.

Something to take away or reduce pain so easily in the shinobi world? Yeah, Shikaku knew too many people who would pay a large fortune for this and would cheerfully slaughter quite a few people if she asked them to in return for this or something similar.

Did she have more? Could she make them? She'd be set for life, if so. And if she couldn't and this was the only one, why would she give it away? If Shikamaru hadn't told him, they wouldn't even have known – they got given toys so often, he hadn't really ever tried to keep track. And deer? Well, they were obviously an easy choice for anyone from their clan.

At Shikaku's prodding, his son finally deigned to put the deer in his lap and focus on eating and he followed suit and relaxed.

This was the life he'd always wanted.

Just relaxing with his son, feeding him, helping him learn, watching him grow; not having to talk or do anything troublesome, but just enjoy peaceful, quiet time where it was just the two of them.

Once they both finished breakfast, Shikaku allowed his son to keep slouching by the dining table while he cleared the dishes and washed up, before re-joining him. Time to find out a bit more about Kara, hopefully, and what happened with the deer.

"Shika-kun," he started, making sure his son was paying attention before continuing, "what can you tell me about Kara-chan?"

There was a short pause as his son obviously carefully picked his words.

"She's weird. Never told me her name… I like her."

Fair enough. It was easy to like the little girl – Shikaku had even been drawn into thinking about adopting her after having talked to her for only a few minutes.

"Weird how?" He questioned further, watching as his son frowned slightly.

"Mum left and I was sore and crying." Another pause as Shikamaru chose his words. "And she didn't know why but then I noticed some gold sparkles and she knew."

Gold sparkles? Like Gold Dust? No, that made no sense. What jutsu was a gold colour but only visual.

"You felt nothing?" Shikaku asked just to make sure, and his son dutifully shook his head.

So, Kara-chan did something which told her Shikamaru was teething.

Did she just guess? All children were teething at around this time and so maybe she recognised it? She grew up in an orphanage, after all.

Still, gold sparkles were curious. A trick to distract his son? But from what? Just the pain? A kindness? Something more sinister?

"And the toy?"

Shikamaru shrugged.

"Her bag. She said," the little boy frowned, straining to remember what Kara-chan had said while he was in pain, "something about a… godson? Tedi? And he used this."

Alright, a nice clean explanation for why she had the toy and recognised the symptoms in his son.

Shikaku didn't trust it one iota. It explained neither the gold sparkles nor where her godson was or why no one had heard of him so far – and why he wasn't in her file. Plus, who made a child a godparent?

"And then?"

Another tiny crinkle on his son's forehead, and Shikamaru looked contemplative as he finally slowly said, "I was lighter."

"Lighter? What do you mean, little fawn?" Shikaku questioned, brushing a soft hand over his son's forehead as if trying to wipe away the tiny furrows.

"I was less heavy," the little boy repeated.

"You weighed less? How? Did Kara-chan weigh you?"

"Uh-uh," the Nara clan heir shook his head, "my arms and head, they were less heavy when she picked me up. A lot less, like a feather."

Yeah.

Shikaku had nothing.

Minato had at one stage played around with a gravity seal, true enough, which had been strong enough to glue himself along with Inoichi and Shikaku to the ground when activated and required his wife too free him (although she had only been his girlfriend back then). Luckily Choza had been outside the fuinjutsu and able to fetch her. Kushina had stood outside the circle made by the seal and laughed, and laughed, before finally deigning to release them.

But nothing like this, nothing to lower a person's weight. How would that even work? Where did the weight go?

There were no seals on his son, nothing his son or himself had noticed.

A kekkai genkai? A weirdly specific one? What would the use of it even be? Wouldn't making your enemy lightweight be a disadvantage for you?

And, Shikaku couldn't emphasise this enough, where did the fucking weight go?

Shaking his head in despair, he opened the backdoor and looked at the nearby forest, holding his son's tiny hand in his own.

"And the deer?"

"Oh," Shikamaru said, "we went over there," he continued, pointing at the forest, "and fed them. I got to touch the little baby deer."

His son seemed genuinely happy – and why wouldn't he be? He didn't know that his little ten-year-old babysitter was casually breaking his poor, old father's brain.

Shikaku Nara was held up as a shining example of his clan, renowned strategist and his intelligence a cut well above the rest.

Konoha was sunk.

Their best, most intelligent strategist and he couldn't figure out how a ten-year-old orphan girl casually went around breaking reality.

"You, ah, petted the fawn?" Shikaku asked and his son nodded firmly. "And the deer?"

"Oh, Kara-chan said to say hi to the mom and dad first and they would then say if I could pet their baby."

Good thinking and well-reasoned.

"And did they… did the deer talk?"

Yeah, Shikaku wasn't entirely sure where that came from either, but he still didn't understand any of the things he'd seen that girl do, so why not. And yes his own son was definitely judging him by the dubious look on his face.

"Dad, deer don't talk."

"Ah, yes," he admitted, "they don't. Just checking, Shika-chan, just checking."

Really, his son somehow weighed as much as a feather for a few hours, but deer talking was beyond the limit, apparently.

To be fair, Shikaku was kind of glad. He had no intention of finding out what the deer actually thought of their rather lazy clan – although it would settle once and for all what criteria they looked for in people. Plus, it was nice to find out there were limits to Kara-chan's mysterious inexplicable abilities… At least he sincerely hoped so.

"Did you get to feed the deer at all?"

"Uh-huh, Kara-chan said to hold my hand like this," his son demonstrated a perfectly flat palm, "and then the big stag took it really softly. It tickled, tou-san," Shikamaru declared with a smile, "can we do that again?"

Yeah, sure, why not. Apparently Rikumaru was getting hand-fed now and fawns could be touched, that was- just, yeah.

Alright, they could always try again later when Shikamaru was older if this went badly. And, according to both his babysitter and his own son, they already knew each other.

What could possibly go wrong, after all?

The moment he stepped outside with Shikamaru, Rikumaru left the forest, headed straight for them, the rest of the deer trailing a few meters behind him. Shikaku quickly took some of the pellets before softly stepping forward, barely managing to maintain his grip on his son's hand as Shikamaru tried to run towards them.

"Careful," he admonished his son in a low whisper as they came to a stop in front of the imposing stag. Shikaku could not remember the last time he had eyed the stag's horns with such trepidation, but they suddenly seemed a lot more lethal than ever before and his son ever so vulnerable.

Adding to his trepidation, Rikumaru acknowledged him with a shake of his head before stepping closer – closer to Shikamaru. He tensed himself, ready to shunshin their way out of here. If he didn't know any better – and did he, really? – he would have said the stag seemed amused at his tension. Another breathless moment, then his son giggled and took a step forward, a pellet in his outstretched hand – which, when did he take that?

His arm was coiled, his hand firmly wrapped around his son's left hand and wrist, ready to throw him towards the house if the stag made a move to bite.

Except, just as Shikamaru had said, Rikumaru just gently used his lips to move and finally grab the pellet to eat it.

Huh.

And yes, his son was once more looking at him like Shikaku was the stupid one and he suppressed another despondent sigh seeking to emerge. What was his world coming to these days? Shikamaru had obviously picked up on his tension but didn't know just how precarious the situation they were in truly was.

And before he could act, his hand having slackened in his grip once he realised there really was no danger, Shikamaru walked past the stag.

Had their hooves always been that hard and menacing? One kick to his son's head and… yes, that image was far too vivid – he had seen to many children with their heads caved in during the war (although admittedly not quite as young), it was not one he wanted to associate with his own son.

Shikaku faintly thought if he hadn't learned extensively how to handle stressful situations, he would be hyperventilating now.

And then his son plopped down and pulled more pellets out his pyjama pockets and a few of the fawn stepped forward to be fed and petted.

Feeling faint as he watched this – even he had only rarely been allowed near the fawn – he carefully reached out to touch Rikumaru's neck, once again taking note of the strongly corded muscles underneath the fur.

"Maa, Rikumaru-san, anything you want to tell me?"

Another glance that looked amused and a quick shove with his snout in his side, before the stag turned back to his family and walked back into the forest, having exhausted their limited food supply.

Shikamaru, on the other hand, remained seated where he was with his arms up in the air, clearly expecting to be picked up. Feeling more relaxed now that this stress, too, had passed, Shikaku obliged his son's silent request without the obligatory prodding to make an effort to walk.

Besides, it seemed like his son could make plenty of effort to walk and jog when the deer were concerned – not a bad thing altogether given their seemingly very strong bond and the clan's relation with the herd.

"So, Shika-chan," he drawled out, "anything else 'weird' about your babysitter?"

A part of him hoped for more – more clues, maybe, with any luck, some answers – but a part of him also really hoped there wasn't any more mysteries left to discover.

"Aa. She took food from our fridge but it was hot when she gave it to me. And I had a bath," Shikaku raised an eyebrow here – willingly taking a bath? A miracle worker indeed, "and my hair normally takes hours but was dry in, like, 10 minutes."

Okay, Shikaku knew Tobirama's control over water had been exemplary and he had apparently been able to heat up food due to its water content fairly rapidly; hell, some Uchiha had mastered fire to the extent they could channel and heat up food without hand signs, although it usually harmed the packaging too.

"And how long would you say it took her to warm up the food?" He asked further, wondering if his son had missed hand signs – control like that usually wasn't found in children that young until they had a lot more experience using and training their chakra.

"She took it from the fridge and I got the food right away," Shikamaru clarified, looking at him with a tilted head, clearly curious to see how he would explain it.

Yes, Shikaku was interested too. It took time, either technique, nothing was instant in the way Shikamaru was describing. He didn't know whether to laugh or cry at this stage.

Instantly drying hair wasn't quite so rare – not when it was your own, anyway. Jiraiya had taken his control over his hair a step further, of course, but this? Drying someone else's hair required the sort of control only a medic-nin would have. On the other hand, maybe she just pulled the water out of his son's hair instead of taking it from the air? But it would have taken amazing control to leave enough water in the hairs not to damage them, and she would have been left with water in her hand.

And although Shikaku could do it, it would usually visibly chill the room.

Yes, Shikamaru had only added to the puzzles, not given him any clues or solutions.

Who in all the Elemental Nations was Kara?

"Ne, tou-san, I want Kara-chan to be my babysitter," his son said, clearly realising his father had serious misgivings, eyes wide and intent on him.

Well, she had eased his son's pain (and his own) and given them their sleep back.

"I'll see what I can do, son," Shikaku promised, before making his way to the couch and collapsing on it, his clan heir cradled to his chest as they got comfortable.

This was his day off and he'd barely gotten any sleep last night. Kara-chan could continue breaking his mind and world view tomorrow. For now, he would just enjoy the peaceful quiet that had settled over the Nara household.

Not to mention, avoid his usual spot sleeping by the forest and deer until he felt a little more on familiar ground with their respective places in the food chain.

It was nearing evening by the time his cousin finally returned and advised him as jonin commander of his injuries and expected downtime.

"Ensui," Shikaku called out to his cousin before he could leave.

"Nope- whatever it is you want, just no. I've had to run through three different countries to lay a false trail for where the assassination came from. I got bitten by mosquitos, I've got a weird rash and sunburn because I had to hide my chakra. I am going to bed and then the hospital for a check-up. In that order. Nothing you say can convince me otherwise, so I don't want to hear it," Ensui said sternly, half-way to the window already.

"I got more on Kara-chan. A lot more," Shikaku announced and as he knew it would, those words halted his cousin in his tracks, swearing faintly.

"Conclusions?" Ensui finally asked without turning around after he finished regretting how easy it was to lure him in and Shikaku had to hide his amusement.

"Got nothing," he admitted easily.

"Nothing?" The jonin questioned, surprised, turning around to look at him. "What do you mean, nothing?"

"Just that," Shikaku repeated with aplomb. "Nothing."

"But," Ensui prodded after a bare moment's hesitation, "you got more clues? As in, a lot more clues?"

Shikaku nodded, still faintly amused underneath his exasperation – at least someone else would soon be as baffled as he was.

"Alright, what do you want?" Ensui finally asked, acquiescing easily in the face of a more interesting riddle; sleep could wait.

"Fetch Inoichi and Choza, drinks are on me," Shikaku ordered and Ensui nodded before jumping out the window. He'd probably be at the Broken Kunai in half an hour, which meant he had to finish up quickly to join them.

Shikaku easily made his way to the back corner where they used to meet up often with Minato. It was a good place to relax and yet be safe from disclosing secrets accidentally.

This table held one of Minato's first public seals (defacing public property, they used to tease and make him flustered and panicked) which had promptly been improved by Kushina a mere month later (while simultaneously calling Minato out on sloppy work). None of them knew how it worked, only that it did. It made their conversation unintelligible and, thanks to Kushina's addition, blurred it to make it impossible to read lips either.

Everyone knew not to disturb him here unless Konoha was on fire, his clan was under attack or the Kyubi had re-emerged and he joined his friends waiting for him already, activating the seal with a seemingly careless swipe of his hand a flare of chakra, drawing a few curious and analytical gazes from the jonin hanging out at the bar.

"So," Inoichi finally asked, once the drinks had been delivered, obviously no longer able to contain his curiosity as he leaned forward slightly, "what's this about, 'kaku?"

Inoichi would always revert to that nickname to annoy him into answering – well, it was working. It always did – not to mention the whole purpose behind this meet-up was to be able to spill his guts (not literally, fortunately) and finally have someone make sense of this insanity.

"Mah, you heard about the latest Nara puzzle?"'

"Ah-ha! I knew it," Inoichi exclaimed, leaning back with a large self-satisfied grin. "All the Nara I know have been looking more awake and invested lately, I knew there had to be another puzzle you were working on."

"'All the Nara you know'," Shikaku drawled out mockingly, "said as if you know anyone besides me."

"Oi, I have you know I know Kiyoshi-" the Yamanaka starts before being interrupted.

"You mean you've said hi to him at the gate," he corrects Inoichi, smirking at the affronted expression on his friend's face.

"And you, Yoshino, Shikamaru, Enchu and Ensui. See? I do pay attention," Inoichi gloats, "Anyway, what's the puzzle? It must be a good one if you need us to brainstorm. So, what's got the great Nara Shikaku, best strategist Konoha has had since the very beginning, stumped?"

"Ma, first, let me introduce Nara Aiya," Shikaku continued, pointing to the Nara elder sitting between him and Ensui. "You've met her once before, I think, during one of our clan get-togethers. Aiya-san is here because I think we've gone past puzzle and into… other? Yes, let's call it that, other territory."

"Other?" Choza questions predictably.

"Yes, other. Not quite a danger, or suspicious, or infiltrating … but not quite not any of those either."

"Thanks, cousin," Aiya spoke up, voice deep and rough from scarring in her throat from a badly done fire ninjutsu in her youth – at least that's the story she gives. Shikaku isn't fool enough to question it out loud. At least not in her hearing – he and Ensui have spent many a night coming up with increasingly ludicrous scenarios as children to explain it. "So enlightening, as always."

Shikaku huffed in amusement.

"Fine, if it's clarity you want, I'd be happy to oblige, of course, honoured elder."

Aiya's lips turned down in dissatisfaction, one hand pulling strands of her slowly-greying hair behind her ear as she eyed him.

"So, we saw this girl training, right, after the Kyubi attack. As she was near the forest, we decided to hover for a moment, just make sure she wasn't going to accidentally make her way into clan property," a telling glance was exchanged between the three Nara, all too aware of what would have happened to her if she had trespassed.

"So, what, was she a stray Nara? Ooh, did your father have an affair and you have a long-lost sister? Or maybe she's-" Shikaku interrupted Inoichi's increasingly excited speculating by forcing him back onto his seat with a firm hand on his forehead.

"No. Just no. You watch too many civilian dramas, Inoichi."

"Ah, I think you mean I live through too many civilian dramas, 'kaku. I work in T&I after all."

Well, there's a thought, Shikaku considers wryly, and wonders if there is some truth behind his friend's suggestion of civilian drama and gossip being part of T&I. It wouldn't be entirely outside their remit. And Inoichi was far too believable in that position – yes, Shikaku was probably better off not thinking about that too hard.

"As I was saying, there is this little girl, an orphan, training her taijutsu. Nothing too special at first – except then she corrects herself, again and again. Things like her foot position and weight distribution, her fingers, her shoulder being too far forward – things you'd need a teacher for. Except it's like she is responding to someone else telling her to make those corrections. So, well, we think interesting, right? But not too big a deal. We just kept an eye out for more clues and figured we may get her onto a Nara team to find out more and help her improve. Orphans don't get much of a chance and she's determined."

Shikaku rubbed his head sheepishly as he continued. "Ensui saw her with a fist-sized ruby of apparently remarkable clarity and cut, not seen before in the Land of Fire. Then she ends up in the genin corps and it turns out: killing intent? Doesn't bother her, barely even notices it."

It is fun being on this side of the revelation, Shikaku notes with amusement. Choza is making notes, Inoichi is listening intently with furrowed brows whereas Ensui has his hand together to think it through and Aiya is focusing on him.

"Turns out she has a bag which has a storage seal on it somewhere as near as we can figure – but is adjusted to stop the bag from unravelling or impacting the seal in any way. At least that's what we've inferred so far. And she's immune to a contact poison which killed two of our ANBU and which we are struggling to make an antidote for. And then I got Kara-chan finally in as a babysitter."

There's a deep furrow in Inoichi's brow, as he interrupts Shikaku.

"Hold on, Kara-chan? Black hair with very noticeable green eyes? About yay high?"

The Nara clan head looks surprised at the recognition but nods anyway.

"Ah, she's friend with Yori and Tomo. And she is interesting. She's good at reading people's expression, good at body language, knows when adults are being condescending."

The Yamanaka ignores Choza's muttered admonishment of "Inoichi, tell me you didn't," … by sheepishly avoiding his friend's stern look. The Akimichi had a tendency to be very kind to children in general.

"And refused to bow until her friends told her I was clan head. Her bow was barely enough to thank a merchant, never mind greet a clan head. Very stubborn and clear issues with bowing to authority."

Shikaku snorted.

"I think you mean issues bowing to you, because she was practically scraping the floor when she was bowing to me."

Inoichi raised at an eyebrow in surprise.

"Huh, interesting. Anyway, she would be good at infiltration, her skills at reading people are impressive; she could tell whenever I faked an expression. On the other hand, her skills at subtlety are, well, rather non-existent, but I'm sure she could learn."

Remembering his own encounter with a flustered Kara-chan and how she'd whimpered and sank back to the floor, Shikaku barked out a laugh.

"Or maybe not," Inoichi corrected himself slightly sullenly at his friend's amusement.

"Oh! Actually, I think I know her as well – or of her, to be precise," Choza interjected, "back when Academy students were sent out to help instead of afternoon classes. I think she was sent to us and helped out. Ringo-kun mentioned her – I hadn't given it much thought until now. We reported it back to the Academy and it seemed sorted."

The Akimichi clan head leaned forward slightly.

"The girl could read kanji, and not simple ones either. She knew how to chop and how to cook like she'd been doing it for years. And," Choza hesitated, eyeing them carefully before becoming stern once more. "we suspected child abuse. Looking at her file, we presumed prior to the orphanage. She flinched and ducked and appeared unfamiliar with positive touch but very familiar with adults looming over her threateningly. I don't think I need to mention that this does not need to be spread about."

Shikaku furrowed his brow. "That sort of suspicion, even if she wasn't in danger anymore, should have been in her file," he said mildly.

Choza nodded in agreement.

"Ringo-kun made an appointment and advised the teacher in person of our suspicions, so I agree, there should have been a record of it."

He nods, "I'll make sure to investigate that. Her reading skills were why she was pushed up a few grades, as well as her general knowledge – lacking in history and many other things, but knew maths, writing, grammar, spelling, could reason her way through scenarios and demonstrated an aptitude for leadership. Very impressive, even for an eight-year-old – it turned out the Academy had accidentally put her down as a six-year-old – but potentially her parents pushed her. A lot of them push their children to the brink of exhaustion or mental breakdown by pressuring them too much, too early. Maybe hers were one of those parents," Shikaku continued his recall from what he'd read in her file and the blanks he'd filled in.

The entire table grimaced, all of them having seen either the children or parents at one stage or another. It never ended well, and the children often were sent into the field too soon and died by overestimating themselves and their own skills, and, more often than not, they doomed at least one more from their team to an ignominious death.

The cooking skill was an interesting addition, but nowhere near the calibre of what he'd heard from Shikamaru.

"Back to the babysitting – here's what I've got: Kara-chan can somehow create golden sparkles and was able to diagnose Shikamaru's teething pains. She admits to being experienced with children teething, so either she diagnosed him physically and the golden sparkles as a distraction or the golden sparkles helped diagnose. I don't know any golden medical jutsu."

Ensui groans.

"This is all going to be like this, isn't it? That's why you have no conclusions," he says with a grumble and Shikaku finds himself smirking wryly.

"Oh, this is just the beginning. Turns out she had a godson – Tedi – according to her. I don't know what parent would nominate a six-year-old as godparent but leave that aside for the moment. He was teething and she had a toy for him – one she gave to Shikamaru. Here's where it gets really interesting. It looks and feels like a normal plush toy, not even firm like most teething toys. No sign of seals or any chakra embedded within. But it numbs, cools and takes away pain. And not just in the teeth – I tried it and it took away old pain in my scars for about half a day. And it didn't touch on Shikamaru chakra to do so," Shikaku finished with flourish, leaning back against the seat to allow him to properly observe his friends.

"Does she have more of them?" Inoichi asked immediately and he found himself grimacing in sympathy – Ino-chan had been a lot more vocal since the day she was born; the Yamanaka head family must be going through hell at the moment. Shikaku shrugged in answer, honestly uncertain of the answer.

"She could sell those for a fortune," Aiya announced and he nodded in agreement, Ensui wincing slightly at the admission.

"And she just gave it away? The things she could ask for in return are…"

They all nodded grimly. It was freely given but it still put them in her debt, whether she acknowledge it or not. Something to take away pain from the young and the elderly, old injuries which ached fiercely but pain killers were potentially addictive, and most could never take enough to actually not be in pain anymore. There was very little people wouldn't give to soothe their own pain, or their parents and their children.

"Gets worse," Shikaku admitted with a sigh and Ensui rubbed his eyes tiredly in response.

"Not sure I want to know anymore," his cousin whinged but despite his words, he remained firmly in his seat.

"I know how you feel," the Nara clan leader admitted wryly, "Kara-chan somehow made my son light as a feather while she carried him. And," he added with a significant look at Ensui and Aiya, "introduced him to the deer."

Both were good enough to gasp out loud, but the sentiment carried nonetheless in Aiya's widened eyes and slightly stiffened shoulders as well as the forcibly relaxed and now-slouched posture of Ensui, ready to respond within moments.

"Yeah, that, exactly. Shikamaru fed and petted the fawn. She petted and fed Rikumaru. On top of that, she can somehow head refrigerated food in the few seconds it took to hand it over to my son and dried his hair pretty much instantly."

His friends all looked as gobsmacked as he felt, although Inoichi and Choza portrayed faint confusion about the deer, even without that, Kara-chan was inexplicable so far.

"Although," Shikaku grinned smugly, "she at least has good taste – little Kara-chan has a very obvious crush on me. It's adorable."

Aiya huffed in laughter.

"Just wait until she gets to know you," the Nara elder commented, eliciting laughter from the table.

"Rude," he sulked, not daring to challenge her further (the woman had changed his diapers – she could and would reveal any and all embarrassing stories to further her cause without regard for her clan head's dignity).

"But none of this makes sense," Inoichi finally ventures, eyes flitting over the list Choza was making earlier of the things they'd picked up on.

"I know," he admitted easily.

"It's far too diverse for a kekkai genkai unless we suppose she has multiple. The deer make no sense under any logic I can think of. Even Itachi or Kakashi aren't that skilled with their elements. Then there's the self-correcting, gold sparks, gravity or weight changes, heating and water extraction? Dispersal? Not to mention the toy. So here I am, impress me, because I am officially at a loss. I'll happily nominate you as next head strategist because I can't wrap my brain around this one. At all. It's suspicious but she's also had so many opportunities to act and didn't. Infiltrators are more skilled at subterfuge. Kara-chan is seemingly incapable of not showing her every thought on her face. All she's done so far is help and be kind."

Shikaku shrugged helplessly.

"There is no one explanation which would account for all of it," Ensui agrees and Aiya chimes in, "but what if it's multiple explanations?"

"Still, how do you explain the deer?" He found himself prodding and once again silence ensued.

"So, what's your current plan?" Choza asked him, eyes expectant and a small smile playing on his lips, "Because I know you and you always have a plan."

Laughing lightly Shikaku leaned back and shrugged again.

"I don't have a plan. Shikamaru wants a babysitter. She likes him and I can't see her harming him. So that's as far as my plan goes. And maybe someday in the future she'll trust me enough to explain it to me herself, if we're very lucky. Or I'll die because she broke my brain with even more impossible things around me. I just- yeah, I am not getting anywhere on this. I have to concede that a 10-year-old outwitted me. What does that say for Konoha if I'm our chief strategist and I get beaten by this little girl who couldn't lie to save her life?"

Aiya laughed, "now you know how I felt with a smart-ass five-year-old constantly telling me how to do better."

Chuckling, Shikaku nodded, "well, Karma is as good an explanation as any, I suppose."

At least he felt better now that his friends were aware.

They were all looking for ways to make sense and failed, but at least they all seemed to agree that as far as they could assess, none of them expected her to be a traitor, infiltrator (though if she were, she would be extraordinarily skilled at it) or intent on harming them or their families at this point.

Shikamaru was nagging him every day about it (the boy had never been more active than when it concerned obtaining the 'right' babysitter – obviously only Kara-chan would match that criteria) but he had to wait until the next clan council meeting to bring it up.

"Any other business?" the Hokage asked and rarely were other issues raised here which had not already been on the agenda for discussion.

With his sigh, Shikaku inevitably drew everyone's attention to himself.

"Well, the Nara clan would like to file a petition for changes to clan missions," he drawled out, eyes half-lidded as he analysed the reaction of the other clan heads.

"Ah, certainly, Shikaku-san," Hiruzen acknowledged his petition with a nod and a note on the paper in front of him.

"And what change is it you're looking for, specifically?" Fugaku leaned forward, looking both curious and suspicious.

A smile tugged at his lips at the chaos Shikaku knew his next comment would inspire.

"Mah, nothing serious. The Nara just want to enlist the genin corps for babysitting the clan heir."

Oh, this was fun. While troublesome, clan heirs always were watched over by genin teams – both for the added security of a jonin on hand in case of kidnappings, but mostly to save the kid from the very babysitters who are supposed to protect them. Asking for the mission to go to the genin corps who many view as the untalented, the ones who don't even try, yes; that would not go over well. But Shikaku was invested, as was his son, and he enjoyed a peaceful homelife. Plus, there was the satisfaction of forcing them to reconsider their bias.

"The Yamanaka second the petition and would like to join it."

Inoichi had obviously caught on quickly and was likely intending to see if he could get a similar toy for Ino.

"The Akimichi would also like to join the petition."

Yes, chaos. Hiashi was shouting, Tsume was laughing, Fugaku seemed angry for some reason and Shibi was silently observing.

"And your reason, Nara-san," the Hokage asked, obviously falling back on formality in the chaos so as to not appear partial.

"It is our clan heirs, should we not decide whom we entrust them to?"

"But," Hiashi was spluttering; a loss of composure, wow, this must have taken him more aback than Shikaku had expected, "it's tradition. Our clans are on those teams, why would you not want them to watch over your son?"

"But isn't that the point?" Shikaku asked, "it's our sons and daughters. The decision should be ours. I am not saying you need to abandon tradition or do as we do. I am saying we should be able to choose who the mission goes to. We ought to be able to choose whom we wish to hire for a mission so long as we pay the required amount, I don't see why the council should dictate this."

"It's a mission to introduce the team to protection of children who may not act as directed and need to be entertained and often protected from their own actions more than others," Shibi explained, "so it went to genin teams because these will be the missions they will undertake. For what purpose do you seek to give it to the genin corps, Shikaku-san?"

"I know why," Fugaku interjected, eyes fixed on him but anger having calmed down, and speaking before Shikaku could divert Shibi's attention back to the general picture.

Exactly what he'd been trying to avoid; he hadn't wanted to name her and bring her to everyone's attention when she was still a newbie in the genin corps and had no protection or any idea how difficult her life could be simply for having the wrong attention on her.

"It's the Kara-girl, isn't it?"

Damn it.

The Hokage exhaled but said nothing to interrupt the ongoing discussion.

"Kara-girl?" Hiashi asked and Shikaku narrowed his eyes slightly but nodded to acknowledge Fugaku.

"Yes. Kara-chan's met my son and he won't accept anyone else for a babysitter. Plus, she's interesting and knows her way around younger children having lived in the orphanage."

Hiashi nodded.

"It's a clan matter, then. I see no reason to intervene. The Hyuga agree that the decision should be left with each clan."

"So, it really was curiosity?" Fugaku asked, dare he say it, hesitantly, looking at him with an indeterminable expression on his face.

Shikaku couldn't help but wonder what the Uchiha had thought they were doing? Arguing for an orphan to be taught by a Nara out of the goodness of their hearts? Arguing for arguing sake?

"Yes, of course," Shikaku affirmed decisively.

Another pause as Fugaku looked at him as if trying to read the truth from his eyes. Finally he nodded and turned to the Hokage.

"The Uchiha concur and support the Nara's petition."

The matter passed without hesitation and Shikaku grinned at Inoichi.

"Shikamaru's going to cuddle with me again," he bragged, "I got his babysitter back."

"Ha, not if she answers my petition first," Inoichi fired back.

"Like that's going to happen – that's what you get for being an elitist berk. Besides, she already loves Shikamaru and me, can't say the same about you."

Choza easily interrupted them, wrapping an arm around their shoulders and pulling them close. Shikaku would like to point out that he was a grown man here and should not be as easy to physically pull or push as one would a toddler; unless, of course, you were an Akimichi.

"You're both wrong," he said with a wide grin, "because I put my petition in already."

And then he left them both behind with a companionable clap on their shoulder (strong enough to make them stumble, of course, and Shikaku didn't doubt for a second that it had been intentional).

He had said it before and would say it again – Choza was shrewd. He'd clearly known and expected Shikaku's plan, even if he hadn't divulged it, and prepared the form beforehand. Cocky and shrewd.

There was a reason their Ino-Shika-Cho had been an exceptional team; they had all influenced each other quite a bit over the years and none of them were versed in only one thing anymore.

Shaking his head in amusement, Shikaku rushed home, knowing his son would be over the moon with the news.

Yes, he knew even less than he'd started out with and was more confused by Kara-chan than ever, but it was benefitting the clan. Shikamaru was not in pain anymore and the deer had accepted him – loved him, even.

Life was looking good and while the not knowing still nagged at him, it wasn't as imperative as it usually was. He trusted little Kara-chan, at least a little. Her love for Shikamaru had been clear and honest.

And he'd look forward to seeing where that girl's determination and skills would take her.

Author's Notes: So sorry. This was meant to come out yesterday, but it just kept growing longer and longer.

Tomo and Yori will have to be introduced in-chapter at some point. I want to advance the story, this is getting nuts.

Did you know this interlude is longer than any chapter so far? hell, it's longer than some of the chapters added together!

Welcome to 13,555 words of Nara goodness. Hope you enjoyed it.

Voting exploded since the last chapter, so here is where we're at - remember, vote as often as you like, you can vote once for each pairing in each review :)

Shisui/Calla - 38
Kakashi/Calla - 70
Itachi/Calla - 91

Please let me know what you think and hope none of the characters went OOC :) Have a lovely Sunday evening, everyone.