Chapter 15: Interlude by Ino-Shika-Cho (and guest starring Tomo)

Summary: In which Inoichi learns his daughter can't sing, the Akimichi learn flour can create a nice explosion, Shikaku gives in and dedicates a room to all things puzzling the Nara about Kara and Tomo commits treason.

Choza was never going on another 'easy' mission with Shikaku, not even if the Hokage himself ordered it. Last time, Inoichi and he had ended up under water in a rotten swamp for 12 hours, using chakra to breathe as they hid in one of Shikaku's 'brilliant' plans. To be fair, Shikaku was amazing at wartime strategy and ensuring the most of their people survived; less great however at small missions where he and Inoichi somehow always ended up in the worst situations while Shikaku came out more or less impeccable.

Take this mission for an example – easy infiltration and information retrieval. Stock and standard for Ino-Shika-Cho and literally what their team combination was designed for.

So, easy mission according to Shikaku and should've been a swish – and with some time away from his bratty daughter for Inoichi. They all agreed.

Of course, as it must, the A-rank mission went sideways shortly after information retrieval when the unconscious master of the house was discovered sooner than expected – a deviation in routine by the maid who had, apparently, broken a vase earlier in that room and had attempted to replace it unnoticed with one from storage at just the wrong time. They had already been a floor down before Shikaku overheard another maid gossiping about her clumsiness and attempts at subterfuge.

Too late to intervene and stop the maid and not far away enough to not be tracked and not enough time to obscure their tracks.

So Shikaku signalled a team split; he would go and cause a distraction – being a shadow user he could hide himself rather well at night and there were few enough shinobi in the guard that they would not pose a threat.

But as they could not know the team attacking them was from Konoha, Shikaku needed to be subtle and not be found – and Inoichi and Choza needed to divert attention to another nation.

So, the 1 ½ day mission turned into five. Shikaku met back up with them half a day out from Konoha; the man himself had barely a few scratches which he showed off mournfully, lips twitching as he looked at them.

Inoichi and himself had to run through three different nations, operating on bouts of four hours sleep before moving on and sleeping during the day rather than at night. They had been bitten to death by mosquitoes when they had none of the usual equipment with them given that they were nowhere near – or even on the way to or back from – the mission. Chakra would give them away to potential pursuers and to disturb mosquitoes, you had to push out quite a bit of chakra.

Unless your name was Kakashi, of course, the little brat. The kid had managed to create a thin layer of lightning across his skin to deter mosquitoes which was of no use to either Choza or Inoichi who did not have lightning nature.

They had run through fields, over mountains and barely escaped a rock slide with more than a few new bruises, through swamps and mosquitoes and with sunburn, exhaustion and even more cuts and bruises from an encounter with a wild bear who had caught rabies.

And while Shikaku, who took the more dangerous mission on himself of direct engagement without giving away that they were from Konoha and distracting them from direct pursuit as much as he could, he somehow always ended up with barely anything to show for it while Inoichi and Choza always looked as if they had been dragged through hell and back.

They really needed to stop going on anything Shikaku classified as an 'easy' mission. It never worked out well for either him or Inoichi.

By the time Choza made it home, nearly four days late, smelling of swamp, sore and utterly exhausted, starving from days of eating nothing but shinobi rations (and although the variety the Akimichi had was somewhat tastier and with a lot more calories, it was still a bland little thing and took all enjoyment away from eating), he wanted nothing more than to go home, shower, and eat himself into a food coma and sleep for the next three days.

Luckily his wife was still awake, putting a bookmark into her chapter as she looked at him, took in his bedraggled state and pulled a face.

"I'm not kissing you like that," she announced to absolutely no-one's surprise, her nose wrinkled at the swamp stench he and Inoichi had attempted - and failed - to get rid off.

"Have a shower, and there's some hot food in the kitchen," she finished; nothing like food to motivate an Akimichi.

Although his shower still took longer than he would have liked given that he hoped to have it hot still, he couldn't stand the smell a second longer.

Dressed in pyjamas, he leaned over the couch to kiss his wife at the most awkward angle – eliciting a giggle from her – and walked off into the kitchen with a smile.

"Dear, where did you say the food was?" he asked, bemused at the sight of the clean – and empty – kitchen.

"In the fridge, dear."

"No, no, I mean the hot food," Choza clarified quickly, opening the oven to check and finding it empty as well.

"The fridge, dear," she reiterated and he would swear up and down he could hear his wife rolling her eyes at him in the tone of voice she used.

Puzzled but not wanting to irritate his wife further, Choza opened the fridge dutifully.

To his surprise, there were several plates of entirely new dishes inside. Some sort of flaky, meaty thing, potato and small filled pockets; pulling all of them out, he cut himself generous portions for his plate.

What a delight – perfectly timed homecoming, he owed Shikaku an apology. This had clearly given his wife time to create entirely new dishes and if he had come home earlier, he may never have gotten to taste this and she would have never created this. So many new dishes!

He could hardly restrain himself but the moment he sat down next to his wife at the dining table – she had moved to join him, clearly curious to see what he thought of her new food – he tried the first bit – his wife told him his son had called it a 'pie', his eyes widened.

The food was hot. And not just mildly warming – but piping hot. Edible, but as if it had just come fresh from the oven.

"How did you manage this?" Choza asked, taking a bit from the potato dish next, only to find it just as hot.

"That's five days old, Choza," his wife told him and that actually made him pause for a moment, tasting the fodd on his tongue for longer, but it all seemed just as fresh and hot as the moment he first tasted it.

"But that's when I left," he pointed out, confused, while trying the little pockets only to find out that they were filled with fruit and clearly intended as dessert.

His wife hummed. "I hope you left some of them on that plate for Shikaku."

Choza knew he was exhausted, but this was getting ridiculous. Whatever leaps in logic his wife had made, he couldn't follow.

"Shikaku?" He asked, still eating, tenseness slowly evaporating as his body seemed to learn he did not need to spring into action any moment and continue his running.

His wife rolled her eyes visibly this time, patting his hand.

"Oh, my dearest husband, I am despairing at your obtuseness this evening. If I didn't know you better, I would believe the civilian rumours about Akimichi being stupid about anything but food. Let me lay it out again. 5 days ago, when you left, we had a new babysitter here, who was asked to cook for our son. Our son told me the names of these dishes. Dishes, which have been in the fridge for 5 days yet come out hot. And dishes which I have not seen anywhere in Konoha before. So, my dear, can you tell me why Shikaku might want to get a hold of these?"

Blinking, Choza re-positioned himself as he stared at his full plate with new intensity. He had left some of everything, true, but if this was all five days old, and had neither gone off or cold – despite being kept in the fridge – this would be an invaluable addition to shinobi life.

"Interesting thing," his wife added, just as he was beginning to process the implications of this, "even food I added to the plate three days ago stayed hot and fresh. Moreover, they're our plates. So it's not the plates, and it's not the food," she shrugged delicately, "and that's as far as I got. We're keeping one of the plates, but Shikaku can have the rest of them to experiment with."

"How do you know they're ours?"

A truly wicked smile tugged at his wife's lips.

"Well, I'm sure you remember the night we conceived Choji," Choza nearly choked on his food, eyes wide, "and when we got busy in the kitchen," he blushed, flustered – a reaction only his wife could elicit from the seasoned shinobi these days – "and your mum's plate nearly fell down? You caught it – and dropped me, which I still cannot believe, by the way, since when does a plate matter more than your wife? – but it forever had that slight crack in it? Yeah, that's one of the plates which now, apparently, keeps food fresh and hot. So definitely ours,"

Choza finished his plate quickly, "I'll give that to Shikaku tomorrow, make his head explode with all the impossibilities around our new babysitter. How did she handle Choji?"

His wife snorted, book beside her, forgotten as she leaned back in her seat to look at him.

"I know now why Shikaku kept her hidden until now. She's a treasure, Choza. Choji loves her, it's adorable. He follows her everywhere like a little lost lamb. She's the only reason he hasn't thrown a huge tantrum about you not being home," Choza winced, remembering coming home from the last mission to his wife in tears, exhausted and a screaming toddler who calmed down quickly upon seeing his dad.

"She has kept him and Choji entertained and playing together and exhausting themselves. She's even got them going to bed happily for a story. So, if you do anything to scare the little girl away, you and I are going to have words," sometimes, it was easy to forget that his wife had been a jonin in her own right before marrying him, had been taijutsu frontline shinobi during the war – times like these, it was very easy to remember her previous career.

"Have I ever said, how much I appreciate you giving up your career and everything you worked so hard for to raise our son and help the clan?"

A coy smile tugged at his wife's lips as she turned her head slightly sideways, eyes hooded, "not in the last week, at least," she demurred.

Food and mysterious genin forgotten, Choza placed a gentle kiss on his wife's hand without breaking eye contact, "Allow me to show you how much I appreciate your dedication."

His wife laughed, lightly and breezily, as she let him tug her around the dining table and into his waiting arms.

"I thought you were tired," she contested lightly.

"Never too tired for you," Choza said smoothly. A blatant lie, they both knew, having been drained beyond compare throughout the aftermath of the Kyubi attack and their crying son, the clan and rebuilding of Konoha, that they had simply fallen into bed for a few hours of exhausted sleep whenever they could.

But his wife laughed again, leading the way to their bedroom, and Choza remembered how amazed he had been the day he proposed to her and she had said yes – Shikaku had said she would, but he hadn't believed his friend, had doubted right until the last moment that she would pick him out of everyone. He loved her more than he ever thought he could, found joy even in just sitting next to her on the couch reading, or cooking together, or sparring.

They were just regaining the equilibrium in their relationship post-Kyubi attack. They had been both exhausted and unable to fully appreciate the other's workload, despite trying and there had been fights. As with all things shinobi, these fights sometimes ended in spars to get the aggression out – but they had both been exhausted coming home each day, near tears and it had been more screaming hurtful words and desperation, rather than anger. It also left them both rather unequipped to deal with. Although they both adapted with time – not to mention some sage advice from Inoichi when there was a moment to spare on the run to or from a mission – and learned how to communicate better.

And, as daft as it sounded, it helped him realise that what he or Shikaku or Inoichi might need from a relationship was different to what his wife wanted or needed from him. Just that small realisation helped him as he realised that his wife wasn't actually demanding expensive – or hugely planned, immense tokens of affection (Shikaku's suggestion) but just needed him telling her things differently, being more explicit with his words, rather than his actions.

And after 2 years they were finally back on a good, healthy relationship. Their son had stopped teething (bless all the gods, even the weird Uchiha-fire ones), mission rates had dropped to a more acceptable level, Konoha was more or less rebuilt and the clan needs had settled as well.

And Choza adored his wife, loved her and how she stood up to him, how she cared for their son, for the clan she hadn't been born to.

He was going to enjoy having the time, finally, to show her just how much she meant to him, he thought to himself, as he closed the bedroom door behind them.

"…Why?" Shikaku finally asked plaintively, his entire voice and body conveying that he was very much sick of being awake and having to deal with, well, anything. Choza privately thought it was a Nara thing to convey everything with voice and body so they had to use as few words as possible – laziness was inherent in everything.

"Thought you might like this," Choza said with a not-so-well hidden grin Shikaku undoubtedly immediately picked up on (those sharp, analysing dark eyes always seemed to see all), holding out the four plates of remaining food he had carried with him to the Nara clan lands.

Shikaku was curious, clearly, but his day off was obviously more important than what he had probably deduced to be new recipes for taste-testing.

"This," Choza presented with relish, enjoying being the one who knew more than Shikaku Nara – for once – and the dramatics were necessary to rub it in. Shikaku, clearly knew it to, by the groan and the arm thrown over his eyes as he laid right back down in the grass behind his house. "is the work of your little babysitter. New never-before seen food – in record-time, I might add – and, even better – still hot and fresh after six days."

Shikaku shot up, eyes on the food and then back on him.

"What?"

Choza nodded knowingly.

"Yep. And it's not the plates – those are our plates from home. And see this? We added this to the plate four days ago and still hot and fresh, just like the rest. So, not the food, not the plates – the rest is up to you. Have fun,"

That said, Choza deposited the plates on the ground, ignoring Shikaku's yelp and mad scramble ("ruin the experiment, Choza!") and left his best friend behind to spend sleepless days and nights, no doubt, ruminating over the latest puzzle. It would be hilarious. And he had as good as won the debt he made with Inoichi before they set out on their mission that the babysitter would do something which would occupy Shikaku for at least three days fully post-mission, or more. Inoichi had thought his friend would have it sussed within two days or less.

More fool him – Choza could think of no explanation for this and he looked forward to Shikaku struggling with the very same conundrum.

Whistling to himself, Choza made his way to Inoichi to share the good news and get the money to take his family out for a lovely lunch together.

Inoichi gave another not-quite silent sigh as his voice ran past him again, barefoot, singing (shouting, he corrected in his head, although he dare not say it to his daughter's face). He privately suspected Kara had done this just to spite him. He didn't quite know what he'd done other than be just a tiny bit condescending when he first met her, but surely he had more than made up for that since then, right? There was no need to punish him further?

Except the Akimichi got new food, new recipes, and apparently ever-lasting food. The Nara got pain relief, the clan heir's introduction to the deer and a better relationship with them, apparently.

And the Yamanaka? They got a daughter who now refused to wear shoes unless Kara was here and wore them too. And who wouldn't stop singing (screeching, his mind pointed out) the song the girl had taught her. A song he had never heard of before but now couldn't even get rid off in his dreams!

"We are all brought forth out of darkness,
Into this world, through blood and through pain
And deep in our bones, the old songs are waking
So sing them with voices of thunder and rain

We are our mother's savage daughters
The ones who run barefoot
Cursing sharp stones
We are our mother's savage daughters
We will not cut our hair
We will not lower our voice."

Inoichi didn't think his daughter really understood the lyrics – or even remembered anything but these two verses (and really, he should be impressed with her memory for repeating these words, even if she didn't understand it – great memory was a fantastic asset in information retrieval). But Ino had definitely picked up on running around barefoot (the amount of tears and blood had nearly given him a heart attack when she cut herself on a smashed glass bottle in the village – the Yamanaka made sure there was a regular mission for the genin corps for village rubbish removal / clean up after that) and that she should not lower her voice and sing with the 'voice of thunder'. She had that one right down pat.

And there she was again, running past in another pass, blonde hair waving in the air as she flailed her arms about, screeching at the top of her lungs, again and again, the same lyrics.

Inoichi buried his head in his arms and groaned, the sound disappearing under his daughter's persistent 'singing'. At this point, even just a new song would do. He flailed for the form requesting a specific member of the genin corps and resolved to talk to Kara and ply her with whatever gifts she wanted, as long as his daughter stopped singing that infernal song.

His wife had, wisely, decided that although she was retired, she absolutely must go on a mission to pick up some new flowers and herbs for their shop. It should've dawned on him then, that something was up, when his wife left the next morning after he came back without a backward glance and at breakneck pace. But he had been too happy to be away from mosquitoes and the smell of rotting swamp vegetation to give it much thought.

Until his daughter got up, that is.

He put it down as a C-rank, urgent and double-pay.

There, that should prioritise him above Shikaku and Choza, at least, even if they had missions for the same day.

Kara had been watching over the entire new generation of Ino-Shika-Cho, apparently, and to Inoichi's dismay, rather than stopping his daughter from singing non-stop, she taught her a new song. And yes, he had joked that it would be a good alternative to the same song over – and it was, kind of, but his preference was still no singing.

Inoichi gave another heavy sigh. Yep, for whatever reason, Kara definitely had to be out to annoy him, he couldn't think of another reason for this otherwise, as he watched his daughter proudly screaming at the top of her voice.

He had more than one clan member come by to make sure everything was alright – and then rapidly disappear the moment they realised that, yes, this was singing, and the clan head had no intention of stopping their daughter's 'artistic expression'. The sharp look his uncle had shot him told him clearly no one believed it to be anything but Inoichi being horribly lenient with his daughter, but neither would they interfere with him raising his child in whatever way he intended to.

"You know you make me wanna shout
Lift my heels up and shout
Throw my hands back and shout
Kick my heels up and shout"

His daughter screamed at the top of her lungs as she kicked out her feet (only barely managing to maintain her balance and not land on the floor or hit her head on the coffee table – another near-heart attack, and Ino happily oblivious and continuing to demonstrate her newly acquired 'singing' and 'dancing' skills to him proudly.

Inoichi barely managed to maintain the false smile pasted on his face as she repeated the, what he presumed to be, chorus lines, again and again.

Dear god, he hoped Choza's and Shikaku's were demonstrating this to their fathers as well.

Looked like another urgent C-rank request to the genin corps was in order and being more clear in his demand of no new songs – please. Let it not be said Inoichi was above begging if it returned him his wife and quiet to his household.

Why couldn't Ino like books? Or sleeping, like Shikamaru?

Inoichi suppressed another sigh as he watched his daughter perform – again – the same song – again – for what seemed like the thirtieth time. He should've left with his wife. Hell, he preferred mosquitoes over this.

But there was only so much overtime he could pull at T&I before being kicked out – due to regulations written by himself, no less!

Shikaku stared dead ahead at the plates sat on their dining table. Two were in the fridge. One in the fridge and one on the dining table had new food on them, the other two remained as they were, with food which was now nine days old.

And still fresh. And hot.

Despite being in the fridge – it was still hot.

The energy – the heat transfer … Yeah, Shikaku was at a loss on how to explain it. Or how there was no steam rising. Or how it affected none of the food surrounding it nor raised the heat of the fridge.

He continued staring at the food. Shikaku was a Nara – he had run every experiment he could think of on the food itself and the plate (Choza would surely forgive him, he figured, and it was always easier to ask forgiveness than to seek permission; besides, it already had a chip in it, anyway, couldn't have been that important, anyway, right?) and come up with nothing. Zip. Zilch.

Just like the mystery herself, Kara, everything she did came up with no explanations.

Ensui had been looped in as had the other Nara but they had all been stumped; so at least Shikaku knew it wasn't him suddenly turning into an idiot.

The new food went off and cold just as fast as it normally did. It cooled in the fridge, steam rose from the plate, everything normal.

But if the new food was placed on the plate which had anything made by Kara still on it, the food remained hot, fresh, denied physics and all analysis pointed to nothing abnormal going on.

Except Kara somehow completely stopped decomposition or heat transfer, despite there being no fuinjutsu anywhere on the plates. Back when Uzushio had still been a thriving city, it was the go-to explanation for everything weird – the Uzumaki must've done something with seals. Seals can do everything and anything.

Except, and Shikaku couldn't say this enough, there was no seal. The plates did nothing.

And Kara had not had an inkling of the treasure trove she had access to, knowledge-wise, and guilelessly agreed to make pie for them and Shikaku had squirreled some of it away.

And it stayed fresh and hot.

But when Choza replicated the recipe and even Shikaku and Yoshino tried their hand at cooking it – it took them several hours longer, even after several repetitions, the dough just took that long to rise – and the pie went off just as fast as any other food.

So it wasn't the food, the recipe, the plate. The only conclusion left was that Kara did something. None of the other parameters had changed and she was the only factor which remained consistent in the result. So Kara must be doing something – but what? And how?

Shikaku sighed.

He hadn't had much sleep and once again it all circled back to one and the same mystery from years ago he still hadn't cracked; the girl who ended up in the genin corps and who, despite being an orphan, shared everything she owned and knew freely, either unaware or uninterested in the financial wealth and goodwill she could accumulate if she put her mind to it.

Another sigh, as he rubbed his eyes, reluctantly standing up and leaving his experiments behind. He had to get to work, having spent another restless night thinking through conclusions, possible experiments and variations to attempt.

All fruitlessly, no doubt. Shikaku was all but certain that Kara was the one who did this somehow – and maintained it, as well, inexplicably – but experiments were there to make sure he hadn't made some fatal flaw somewhere in his conclusion.

He didn't know whether to thank Choza (another mystery – so intriguing!) or take his frustration out on him in a 'friendly' spar (so many nights of no sleep!).

If he hadn't been a shinobi – not to mention extremely well-trained in deception – Shikaku would have sputtered in surprise and outrage. Another girl in the genin corps – Tomo – had helped Kara get in touch with a merchant to sell her soft toys across the elemental nations, and he had jumped in to assist, given his experience in negotiating contracts (Kara's blush had been adorable at him offering to help her). Whereas Shikaku had pre-negotiated for a high selling price and a high percentage of the wins going to Kara, the girl wanted to split profits in half, arguing that the merchant was doing all the hard work.

Even the merchant had half-started to argue against her before realising she was arguing in his favour, leaving him with a half-consternated expression on his face. Still, the merchant himself ended up on Shikaku's side, obviously not wanting to take advantage of a young child and trying to make her take a large percentage. This again reaffirmed that this Tomo girl had a good eye for contacts, something he was quick to point out to Inoichi. He half-suspected Tomo was actually a genin corps plant for mining information, but had no proof one way or the other and Inoichi had a remarkable poker face when it counted, only giving him a quick grin at his tip.)

Somehow, Shikaku still could not follow how, they ended up with Shikaku getting 5% (argued down from 20%), 15% going to protection detail for the merchant, 40% for the merchant and 40% for Kara herself.

But that wasn't even the worst of it. The merchant had been effusive and kind and practically adopted the little girl before he left (Shikaku could sympathise, he had been there) and then Kara dropped the next anvil on him, as she asked him about donating her entire percentage to the red-light district and orphans.

In his surprise, Shikaku had been rather brutally honest with her and told her if she wanted to give the money and make sure it was well-used, she was better of doing it herself. Most of the charities they had, ended up with rather well-paid managers who retained most of the donated money with only little trickles here and there making their way to provide entirely ineffectual aid to the people it was donated for.

Choza had told him she stumped the Akimichi similarly, claiming everyone knew these recipes (excuse you, the Akimichi begged to differ – and they were pretty much the arbiter on anything food-related in Konoha). When that argument failed – as it should – she said food shouldn't be hoarded but shared (Choza had actually looked into adopting her, Shikaku had discovered to his amusement, but as they had recently found out his wife was pregnant again, they had dismissed the idle musings).

Naturally, Choza insisted she should still be paid – and also be paid to teach it to their chefs. Of course, under their supervision, the dough took just as long to rise as it did for them. So, somehow, she had a way of making it rise faster when unsupervised.

The Akimichi chefs had started experimenting in their spare time about infusing the dough with chakra (medical and different natured chakra) to see if it had an effect on making it rise faster (one of them had managed to explode their dough with fire natured chakra and the intelligence division was now looking into weaponizing this somehow).

This girl was changing things left, right and center without even being involved in the process or aware of it.

Shikaku sighed and added it to the board. One of the old Nara homes which had remained empty for the last five years was now being used as the 'Kara' room.

No, it was not for the girl to sleep over.

It was an entire room dedicated to the puzzle the girl presented to the clan with notes and annotations – two plates of food still on the table, the wall covered in noted, sketches, experiments, threads going from different locations spanning the entire room in a weird spiderweb connecting seemingly unrelated events and trying to find explanations.

They had so far pretty much got that she must have at least ten different kekkai genkai.

…

Yes, it was a working explanation and clearly just as impossible as all the other things she had done (one of the reasons why it was even listed as a potential explanation was that Ensui pointed out it was the only one they had, and that it was just as inexplicable as everything else around her, so why not at this stage?).

The most recent addition to the room was the discovery that her home was impenetrable by anything other than invitation, as far they could determine.

One of the newly graduated Nara genin had been tasked with picking up Shikamaru from Kara's home had made the inadvisable attempt of going in via the window (all genin did it when they first learned tree-walking, until they learned that doing this to a jonin may end with a trap in their face they have no hope of dismantling – or encounter Kara's eclectic and inexplicable protections, apparently).

Shikaku had been confused when the genin ran past him the third time as he sat outside his home, reviewing mission reports for inconsistencies or a common thread, headed home, still without Shikamaru and stopped him. He had blabbered on about how he needed to do his laundry right now. Shikaku, puzzled, gamely reminded him of his job to pick up his son and the genin looked confused for a moment before realisation dawned on him.

He apologised and hopped off again. It took another three tries, before Shikaku gave up on the paperwork and followed the genin (to get a medical check up, to turn the oven off and to clean his room, respectively). The moment he neared her window, his jump would go astray, landing him just above or below the window itself and making him remember something inane he had forgotten and somehow inducing a sense of urgency in him while forgetting his original objective. Intriguing.

Collecting his son from her home (by the door, he wasn't an impolite genin, thank you very much), Shikaku gave the property a quick glance under half-lidded eyes, not seeing any fuinjutsu. He had, of course, seen her home when he dropped Shikamaru off, but he hadn't known that it was protected then, so he presumed he had overlooked the seals that must be inked somewhere.

But just like the plates, he couldn't see any seals. Shikamaru hadn't seen any seals when asked either.

So up on the board it went as another mystery.

Shikaku personally suspected that the protections were only so benign because the Nara genin hadn't had any malicious intentions. You didn't go to the extent of invisibly protecting your apartment so well, if it couldn't actually keep you safe.

Still, testing her protections was impolite and not-done to allies, so it went up on the board along with a long list of experiments (growing by the week) the Nara would like to run on the property.

Another day with Kara, another mystery.

Shikaku sighed, leaving the room behind to head home to his family. He deserved a nap with his son in whatever sunlight remained; trying to decipher the nonsense that made up everything Kara was and did, was making him miss so much sleep (he couldn't count the many times he woke up in the middle of the night with another idea and it would never leave him alone until he had run through the scenario, possible consequences and either wrote it down to try or as an addition to all the experiments they couldn't run while trying to remain on good terms with the babysitter.

So, so troublesome.

Tomo tapped out another code on Yori's arm, watching and offering another smile to Kara, asking him to be watchful. The girl was kind, happy and genuine as a shinobi could be and only around ten years old – and she raised every hackle on Tomo's neck; she was either a terrible spy (so obvious) or a great one (because everything about her checked out).

Tomo had been called in by her superior – Inoichi – to investigate another suspected genin corps plant. It was a well-known 'secret' that spies could most easily be implanted in the genin corps. She had been 'kicked' off her team (recruited by Intelligence, in reality) and she, along with a few others she didn't know about, were pointed at targets and told to report on them to their respective superiors.

Yori, on the other hand, was her childhood friend and just as jovial, open and relaxed as he pretended – he made a great cover for approaching people and he was a fantastic help at sussing out people.

After some sort of incident at the hospital (she was too low in the totem pole to know details, only that it involved poison so she would know what to defend against if necessary), Kara had come to their attention – and, obviously, hers as well as a result.

It was… interesting work. Tomo had never intended to go into intelligence, but ended up there because her jonin sensei had realised just how good she was at making contacts when Tomo had talked with a previous client from two years ago and found out crucial information for the success of their mission.

Not that it stopped there; Tomo had been raised among civilians, but her mother came from the Inuzuka (she lost her dog and left – and then found her father, while working as a waitress).

Point was, Tomo had contacts in both the civilian and shinobi world. A lot of civilians had watched her grow up – she had helped out her dad with his stall at the market and knew the merchants and a lot of the people buying there by sight alone and they talked to her. Then she had the Inuzuka clan, obviously, who were a lot wiser to her manipulations but often allowed it – and she bonded with them, too. They introduced her further and so on and so forth.

Back then her missions as a genin on a team meant she had a lot more interactions and as the 'token' girl on the team, her team mates often left her to handle all social interactions (still rankled, but being on the genin corps now put all of it into perspective, she had to admit). So, she got more information. Then she started helping out – this merchant's usual supplier got killed in a clash between civilians, well, Tomo knew someone who might be able to help.

And so she had built and held one of the most secretive and intrusive spy networks in the village; the civilians had information on everyone, but most didn't realise that knowing the last Hatake always went shopping on the first and the twentieth, in the afternoon, and that his favourite included eggplant, would be valuable for anything other than sending their daughters his way.

It would be easy, however, to use the information to catch him unaware or poison – and that was the most benign example of the information they held. Often, they could tell you about liaisons, opinions, political climate and financial dealings across the elemental nations if you spoke to the right person about the right topic that interested them.

And Tomo knew them all.

Which was why she was so vexed – and troubled.

She had been on the Kara-mission for months, given report after report but had not yet been recalled.

And she'd grown to like the girl. The child was adorable, cute and so, so genuine – her every reaction and thought played out on her face and body. How did she have anything to do with poisoning someone at the hospital. Also, why would someone poison someone at the hospital – wouldn't you do it far away from one?

Plus, the girl was functionally blind – or completely unobservant (a serious flaw in any spy). She noticed nothing unless it was pointed out to her three times, shoved in her face and repeated umpteen times. Genjutsu lessons had been a disaster from beginning to end – willing to learn, yes; observant – hell to the no.

Tomo had met dogs – hell, she had met puppies who were more observant. When she told Kara they'd try again in a few years, she meant never – but couldn't tell her to her face (she was adorable and she didn't want to hurt the little girl).

Anyway, Tomo was compromised, and she admitted as much in her report, but was still not recalled.

Then Kara was asked to watch over the clan head's children – including her superior's – and got special missions for them.

Tomo was left floundering – they were still in touch, Kara viewed them as friends (and Tomo did too, although she was still wary, knowing that this was the easiest way of gaining information as it was how she did it, too) and she made sure they went out together, trained together and everything.

And it only threw up more questions (luckily, Tomo thought to herself, she was not paid enough to answer those questions, only to raise them and bring them to her superior's attention. Tomo wouldn't have a clue on how to start explaining even just half the things Kara did or knew).

But why, if Kara was under suspicion of being a spy, given her continued assignment – and payment – for keeping her under observation, would you entrust her with your child? Your one and only heir?

Adults really broke Tomo's mind; she couldn't understand them, both shinobi and civilians seemed to be remarkably obtuse on some issues.

And Kara was kind – paying for their meals, organising training plans (how? Tomo had been for years under an assigned jonin teacher and she couldn't craft one like that or with such discernment towards their strength and weaknesses!), asking for her input in helping the orphans and in the red-light district.

The child seemed like an all-around good person, it was harder and harder to keep questioning everything rather than just accepting things as Kara behaviour.

It all came to a head half a year later, at which point Tomo point—blank told Inoichi (she used a mission as cover for seeking him out, of course, she wasn't an amateur, thank you very much) that she believed Kara not to be a spy and refused to continue reporting on her.

Inoichi, against all expectations, had smiled, clasped her shoulder, and told her that he was proud of her – that this was important. It was something they had to push with all intelligence workers – find the line you're not willing to cross, find who you trust and whom you don't, because you cannot live your life looking at everyone with mistrust. You need to be able to draw a line at some point on whom you trust; even if the trust is misplaced, it's an important lesson to learn that life cannot be lived under such scrutiny.

Yeah, Tomo was back to not knowing what to do with stupid-ass adults who were too 'mature' to say what the fuck they wanted.

Luckily, when she ranted about it to her mum, she agreed and commiserated (barely holding back laughter, but that was just her awesome mother!).

Then it all came to a head when Tomo was called in to report to the Hokage directly about everything and anything she had picked up on with Kara as they were suspecting her of collaborating with Kumo to kidnap the Hyuga heiress.

If Kara did anything to put a child into harm's way, Tomo would dance naked on the Hokage monument – not that she dared to tell the Third that to his face.

And so she engaged in treason for the first time (but not the last).

It was… an experience. It left her sweating, panicking, looking over her shoulder (metaphorically, of course, training taught her better than to actually do so). She couldn't deviate from her reports, but she could downplay things and she could omit anything they had no witness to (such as the training plans drafted for them) and hope Yori would stick with Kara too (she suspected he would, having known him all her life and his fondness for the child, she suspected he would omit anything he didn't consider relevant (and that was such a broad term, it was easy to misinterpret, wasn't it?)).

She only hoped they would all stay out of T&I or at least be released soon.

Tomo had gone from investigating a potential spy to committing treason for her by lying to the Hokage and omitting information from her superiors. It was easier than she should it would be; Inoichi had been right after all, you had to draw lines around what you deemed was important to you. Kara was in that small circle.

Still, she really, really hoped this wouldn't come back to bite them in the ass.

Author's Notes:

Credit for the songs: Sarah Hester "Savage Daughter" and the Isley Brothers "Shout"; I own nothing if that wasn't clear by crediting them to someone else :) They're awesome, have a listen if you need a cheer-me-up :)

Voting - you can still vote, for any or all three when you leave a review (just saying the name of the couple is not a review and will not be counted). Current count:

Shisui = 116 votes
Itachi = 325 votes
Kakashi = 311 votes

Okay, so I should probably mention that Tomo was not meant to be a spy originally. She just... kind of ended up one? As of this chapter? And this chapter didn't really fill in much of the intervening time like the birthday party or Christmas I intended, so that might just pop up later. Next up we'll have Tomo's interrogation :)

Also, I am still on holiday (and technically close contact lockdown i.e. excuse not to leave the house and play Dragon Age 2 (finished 1 - yay for becoming Alistair's Queeen - boohoo the abandoning lump left me to reign instead and goes on traveling tours. He changed after I married him *sob* he wasn't always like this, you know?) and got a question - how the hell do you romance Fenris? Bastard just goes further and further down the rivalry path no matter what I do. Can't please him slaying slavers left and right does nothing. Might go with Sebastian (far too religious for my taste, but oooh, that voice).

Thanks for the reviewers who left me awesome omake - I have included some of them here and a big kudos to them:

An omake provided by QueenCarlton situated in the Chunin exam invasion:

Random Chunin POV: There's Sand and Sound shinobi in disguise and it's hard to differentiate between a random civilian merchant and an invading shinobi so there's no warning until they attack. One of Orochimaru's summoned snakes is heading towards a residential area and crap-that-neighbourhood-hasn't-been-evacuated-yet- Except. The snake doesn't crash through the houses and bring them down. What? Wait is that-? Yep, there's a translucent bubble around that house that just bounced the snake off? It's a civilian home, right? Yeah, its civilian, no traps visible. Then how the f**k does it have BETTER barriers than the walls and the Hospital which are both maintained with the latest by the Barrier teams?

Another omake, also by QueenCarlton:

Sakai: It would appear, Kara-chan, that you found the answer to your question regarding what threat you would offer to an enemy Jonin looking to kidnap the Clan Heirs? Care to share?

Kara: *meep*

An omake provided by CatNapTime of how Calla took out the attacker who tried to kidnap Hinata so easily:

Puppy-eye no Jutsu with a onesie powerup!