"Ron, mate, wake up," intruded Blaise's voice.
Ron mumbled something inaudible.
"Whatcha doin' on the floor?" came Harry's voice.
Ron opened his eyes. Surely enough, there he was, on the floor next to the couch he had fallen asleep on the previous night, clutching his pillow.
"Good morning, mate," said Blaise, beaming down at Ron.
"What are you smiling at?" Ron asked defensively, standing up and checking to make sure all of his body parts were still present.
"Heard you and 'Mione had a row," he said, "She made you sleep on the couch, eh?"
Then Blaise burst into laughter.
"Shut up, you," Ron threatened, "I'm going to go sort all this out right now."
"Do you have any idea what you're going to say?" Blaise asked seriously.
"Yes," Ron said.
Blaise cocked an eyebrow.
"No," Ron said, and sat down gloomily on the couch.
"Would you like some help, then?" Blaise hinted.
"Oh, what have I got to lose?" Ron said dismally.
Meanwhile, Harry was in the kitchen, eating a bowl of cereal. Then the doorbell rang.
"Who in the hell…" Harry said to himself, setting his cereal down and hopping off of the counter.
In the sitting room, Blaise was suspiciously whispering to Ron. Harry peered through the door and saw frighteningly blond hair, but he couldn't see anything else. He opened the door.
"Hello, neighbor," said a boy about Harry's age, maybe a little older, with blonde hair and blue eyes and big white teeth.
"Er, hello," Harry said, feeling a little silly with his accent and taking in the boy's shirtless chest and bright orange swim trunks.
"My name's Tom. Me and my friends are staying across the street," he said, pointing to a house quite similar to the one Harry was staying in, "Listen, I'm looking for a pretty little red-head I saw rolling around in the front lawn yesterday."
Tom's big smile was rather distracting and Harry was finding it difficult to focus on what he was saying.
"Erm – You mean Ron?" Harry said, stepping aside so that Tom could see past him.
Tom looked past Harry and saw an orange-haired boy straddling a dark-haired boy and shouting "YOU SON OF A BITCH! I'LL BLOODY KILL YOU!" while strangling him.
"Ron!" Harry said.
"What?" Ron said, looking up at Harry, then at Tom.
"He bloody started it!" he shouted, leaping to his feet and pointing at the other boy.
"That who you're looking for?" Harry asked, turning back to Tom.
"Um, no," Tom said, looking back at Harry, "It was a girl that I saw…"
"Oooooh," said Harry, "That was Ginny. GINNY! YOU'VE GOT COMPANY!"
Tom looked taken aback that Harry had suddenly yelled.
"By the way, I'm Harry," he said, holding out his hand.
Tom shook it and Harry invited him inside. Tom eyed the two rolling on the floor nervously and followed Harry with much relief into the dining room.
"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DO YOU MEAN, I'VE GOT COMPANY?" someone shouted down the stairs.
Harry motioned for Tom to sit down at the dining table and stuck his head back out into the sitting room and shouted, "WHY DON'T YOU COME FIND OUT?"
"Sorry about all the yelling," Harry said, sitting down, "It's the best manner of communication, though."
"I know what you mean," lied Tom.
"Would you like some tea?" Harry asked, as was expected.
"Uh," Tom said. Tea? He thought, why tea? "Sure, thanks."
Harry rushed into the kitchen to make tea.
"I hate you Harry, waking me up at noon, saying I've got bloody company. What does that even mean, 'I've got company'?" said a woman whose voice was rapidly growing closer, "Who in the bloody hell would come looking for me – " she spotted Tom and finished in a whisper, " – here."
Tom looked up to see the most beautiful redheaded, caramel-eyed woman he had ever seen.
"Er, hello," she said uncertainly, "Do I know you?"
"No," Tom said, standing up, "I'm Tom. I'm staying across the street with my friends. I saw you in the yard last night and I just… had to come see you again."
"I beg your pardon?" Ginny said, looking at Tom like he was crazy.
"Ah, I see you've met Tom," Harry said, entering the dining hall with tea. "Tom, this is Ginny."
He set about serving the tea. Tom could hear Ron in the sitting room, still yelling threats at the other boy.
"Who's here to see you Gin?" said yet another boy from the living room with a teasing tone, "Who is it? Who is it?"
He appeared in the dining hall behind Ginny. He was a big guy with white-blonde hair and silver eyes. Tom couldn't help but feel intimidated. The boy stopped teasing Ginny when he saw Tom.
"Oh, hello," he said, sticking out his hand, "Draco, pleased to meet you."
"Tom," Tom said and shook his hand. He noticed that Draco had one hand resting on Ginny's hip and suddenly realized, with much embarrassment, that she already had a boyfriend.
"How do you like your tea, Tom?" Harry asked from the table.
"Uh, I'm not sure," he said, tearing his eyes away from Draco's hand on Ginny's hip, "I can't say as I've ever had tea before."
"Never had tea?" Harry said, straightening up and looking at Tom incredulously, and then he looked down at the tea and repeated, "Never had tea?"
Harry seemed at a loss of what to do. Draco and Ginny seated themselves at the table and Tom followed.
"So," Draco said, "What's Blaise done this time?"
"Something to do with Hermione I suppose," Ginny told him, then looked to Tom, "Ron's the redhead in there. He's my brother. Blaise is the one he's beating up."
"And Hermione is Ron's girlfriend," Draco finished, taking his tea from Harry, "Very protective, that one."
"Hermione made Ron sleep on the couch last night," said Harry with obvious glee, handing Ginny her tea.
"Don't laugh, Draco, it's not funny," Ginny scolded, trying to contain her giggles as the two boys laughed it up.
"Well, I put a ton of sugar in this," Harry said, handing Tom his tea, "I know there's fifty grams of sugar in every American drink."
Tom took the tea and sniffed it experimentally. It smelled edible, so he lifted it to his mouth. He looked up and saw that Draco, Harry, and Ginny were all looking at him curiously, not moving.
"YOU MOVE, AND I'LL BITE IT OFF!" Ron screamed in the sitting room.
Tom suddenly thought he must be doing something wrong if they were all staring at him so, but when he saw Harry do just what he was about to do, he lifted the tea and took a sip. Everyone was still looking at him, so he said, "Mmm." They all smiled, relieved, and went back to their own teas. Tom felt more comfortable when things weren't so motionless, so he took another sip. It wasn't so bad.
Just then, Ron burst into the dining hall and yelled, "Blaise said his wanker's bigger than yours, Harry," in a rather tattletale kind of way.
"That's not saying much," said Draco under his breath.
"You're one to talk, Malfoy," Harry shot at him.
"Who're you?" said Ron accusingly to Tom.
"Don't be so nice, Ron, he'll think you're gay," Harry said sarcastically.
"He's not?" Tom said without thinking.
Ginny and Draco snorted into their teacups and choked on their tea.
"He's not," Harry said, though he was laughing as well.
"What makes you think I'm gay?" Ron demanded.
Tom thought it best not to say anything. Apparently, so did everyone else because they all suddenly went back to their tea.
"Maybe it's the way you made loooove to me last night," said Blaise, entering behind Ron and pelvic-thrusting him in the behind.
"You disgusting faggot, stay away from me!" Ron shouted, pushing him away.
Ginny fell heavily out of her chair and onto the floor, rolling around and laughing.
"That's not what you said last night," Blaise said, smiling seductively at Ron and walking back over to him, "What you said was more like –"
"That's enough," said a brown-haired girl from the entrance to the dining hall.
Blaise and Ron turned around and she was glaring straight at them. She walked past them without a word and sat down at the table.
"Tom, meet Hermione," Harry said.
They both said their hellos and Hermione went about fixing herself tea.
"Well, the gang's all here!" said a lovely Asian woman brightly, entering the hall after Ron chased Blaise back into the living room.
She came over to the table and sat right in Harry's lap.
"This," Harry said, poring her tea, "is Cho."
There were more hellos and then everyone was silently sipping their tea, looking at each other.
"Hey," Tom said after a while, "We're having a party across the street at my place today. Y'all up to coming?"
After getting over the initial shock of actually hearing the dreaded Word, Hermione piped up.
"Sure, what time?" she said.
"Oh, around eight or so," he said, "Speaking of which, I'd better get going. I've got stuff to buy and people to invite…"
Everyone simultaneously pushed their chairs back and walked out into the living room together.
"Well, see y'all later," he said as he left.
The group shuddered at the use of the Word again.
"A party!" Cho said, "What fun!"
"Uh-oh," said Ginny suddenly, "Where are Blaise and Ron?"
They looked around as if they must just be lying in a corner or something.
"They're in the backyard," said Luna, descending the stairs.
"Ah," Ginny replied.
Ginny went upstairs with Hermione and Draco and laid back down on her bed, feeling the need to replenish the excessive sleep she had missed out on due to the unexpected visitor. Tom sure was weird, she thought, feeling Draco lie down on the bed next to her. Then again, he was a muggle, and muggles always seemed a little strange. She suddenly wondered why they were going to a muggle party to be surrounded by strange muggles. Oh, well, she thought, too late now.
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'Kay, so that was a humorous chapter. Didn't expect it to turn out quite like that, but I guess it was still okay.