Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. That right belongs to George Lucas. It should be noted that some things are borrowed from Greg Bear and Jude Watson, both who write EU (Extended Universe) Star Wars books.

Writer's Block: http: (double slash) en .wikipedia .org /wiki /StarWars This is a great site for Star Wars information. I referred to this constantly to find information. You can also input into the search engine Lightsaber Combat, Jedi, Sith, Holocron, List of Star Wars races, and Force Powers. If you follow the blue-word links in these articles, you can get to practically anything. Type any words into the search engine, and see what you can find. But the ones I listed were the ones I found the most useful. This is a great site, with lots of information. Go wild. :)

I decided to have a cliffhanger for the last chapter. Just to mix things up, since I don't normally do them. It was fun, wasn't it? ;) Anywho, I like using the holograms to give you information—I had fun with that. I am trying to type with a meowing friend to my right, and it is very difficult. She is crazy, but she will be going soon (not forever, though…darn kitties, gotta love 'em ;) ) since she came over uninvited. She's squeaking now; she has a wide array of animal noises, but she lacks intelligent human ones.

Okay, I'm done bashing my friend now. :) (I do love her, though, even if it's not that apparent right now.)

Alchemy dream had a good point of me not being concise…well, part of that is just my writing and won't change, but I'll try to be more aware of that problem. I guess I just need to find a balance between being elusive and being evident. But thank you for critiquing me on that—I will strive for improvement. However, if I really seem to go off track there is usually some symbolic purpose behind it. Such as the permanent marker marks on the wall: they were supposed to symbolize troubled pasts. You can't really erase the past—and the harder you try to the worse your mess becomes—but you can paint over it. Anakin tried to wash out his past, and this messed him up even more. Obi-Wan (always on the other end of the spectrum) painted over his problematic past. So his past mistakes are still there, but they are less noticeable. Perhaps he's not even aware of them himself now.

I'm trying to incorporate some of the literature elements of good stories into mine, and hidden symbolism is a big one. I know that I'm still experimenting with writing, and not everything is going to be good, but I want my story to have depth. But perhaps I'm not doing a good job at hinting at the hidden depth, and you guys only think I'm crazy when I have those rambling paragraphs. Most of them have a hidden meaning in them, I swear. XD Well, even if you're not looking below the surface, it's still a good story (I hope). Please, please, criticism and comments. And please, please, please, enjoy, above all else. My happiness comes from yours. :)

Page Amount: 5 (sorry for such a little chapter)

Word Count: 3,708

Written 7-14-05

Listening to: Sting "Desert Rose"

Written by Ice Dragon3

Jedi Genocide

Chapter Seven: Dark Rooms

Anakin stepped closer to Obi-Wan, towering over his smaller form. "What are you doing here, Obi-Wan?" Anakin looked serious. The blue rays from the hologram reflected in his eyes, coaxing them to become an impossibly deep, piercing blue. He gaze flickered to the hologram before returning to the Jedi once more. The surreal cobalt blue of his intense eyes unnerved Obi-Wan. "I thought I made it clear that these floors were for business."

"Well, yes, you did," Obi-Wan said haltingly, trying to buy himself some time. He had no clue what to do—what to say—how Anakin would react. He opted for the lie closest to the truth, and told Anakin, "Leia was driving me up a wall, so I decided to take a walk…I went down the stairway and checked out whatever rooms I came across. I was just bored, really… I didn't expect to actually find anything…"

"So now you can walk through locked doors." The unsmiling expression never left Anakin's face. An irrational desire seized Obi-Wan, and he wanted desperately to smash the holoprojector. He wanted to kill the light that made Anakin's eyes blaze so strongly, but he was afraid of how Anakin would react to his actions—he was afraid of this violent impulse himself. Anakin's grave voice brought his attention back to the man before him, "Somehow, I don't think that's a trick you picked up from the Jedi."

Obi-Wan grabbed at the first thing floating in his mind: "They were locked?"

Anakin tilted his head to the side and stared out at Obi-Wan from the corner of his eyes. The cool look gave Obi-Wan the shivering feeling that Anakin was dissecting his every word and action. Anakin's icy blue eyes narrowed and he said coldly, "Don't try to play mind games with me." His voice sounded bitter, acidic.

Obi-Wan tried to put an apprehensive expression on his face—and could feel himself failing. "I'm not. They weren't locked when I went through them. You know me…do you really think that I would sneak into locked rooms, Ani?" The nickname slipped out before he could stop it; he was too nervous to control everything he said.

The use of Anakin's nickname made him more suspicious; Obi-Wan instantly realized his mistake when Anakin's face darkened and his eyes narrowed.

Obi-Wan sighed, admitting defeat. There was no way for him to outmaneuver Anakin's logic unless he drastically changed his tactics and caught Anakin off guard. "You caught me, Anakin. Yes, I did break into these rooms." The look he gave Anakin was almost defiant.

"Why?" Anakin asked, hurt apparent in his voice if not his eyes.

Obi-Wan looked away, to the hologram still playing. "I wanted to know more about you…I don't know you anymore."—he glanced furtively at Anakin before returning his gaze to the blue holofigures—"I really don't. And I want to know you. For four years I've been trying to shut you out of my life, and now… Well, I only hope that it's not too late to correct my mistakes."

Obi-Wan watched Anakin. The Sith Lord was silent, his face combating conflicting emotions. Anakin's hand lifted, and for a moment Obi-Wan feared that he could see past the lies—that Anakin was going to Force strangle him. But Anakin was two very separate men: he was Anakin, and he was Darth Vader. It was Anakin lifting his hand, and it was Anakin who set it down on Obi-Wan's shoulder. Darth Vader still slumbered in Anakin's soul, but Obi-Wan knew if he wasn't careful he might wake the blood-hungering beast. A situation he'd rather avoid.

"All you had to do was ask, and I would give it to you. I would tell you anything you wanted to hear," Anakin said forcibly. His mechanical right hand tightened on Obi-Wan's shoulder. "I would have told you."

"…I think I knew that," said Obi-Wan quietly. "I also think that I was just too proud to ask."

"But not now." Complete conviction coated his voice, making the words hang thick in the air.

"Not now," Obi-Wan echoed softly.

Anakin stared into his moss-green eyes before abruptly turning away. He turned off the hologram with swift, jerking movements of his hands. He removed the disk and placed it in its case carefully, gently caressing the plastisteel cover in an almost loving way before sliding it into its holder on the shelf. After he had done all this, he turned back to Obi-Wan. "Ask," he commanded imperiously.

Startled by how fast Anakin had gone from one mind-set to the other—but not letting the moment slip by—Obi-Wan asked, "How did you record that? Our peace note delivery mission on Naboo?"

"Artoo-detoo records everything that he sees. I programmed him that way. Normally, I just wipe away the useless images once I feel that enough time has lapsed that they've become a pointless waste of memory storage. But other hologram recordings I keep. This is one of the many memories of Artoo that I saved." He stiffly waved a hand to encompass the entire room.

"…Are all of these Artoo's memories?" Obi-Wan gazed at all the recordings; there looked to be too many for just one droid to have…

"No, they aren't."

"Well, where do they come from—how do you get them?"

"Here and there, by different means."

Obi-Wan, sensing that Anakin's responses would remain this evasive and terse if he continued with the same line of questioning, altered what he was going to say next. The consequences could—would—be dire if he made Anakin feel cornered or uncomfortable.

"Why did you label that disc 'peace'? If I remember correctly, the ending was nowhere close to peaceful." Obi-Wan chuckled at the memory, even though he had no reason to, being in such a dangerous situation. Perhaps his nerves were frazzling to the point near hysteria, and that's why he couldn't help but laugh. "Zounds, I'm starting to remember it all now… The Gungans nearly killed us when we came back, but somehow you talked them out of it. I don't even know how, but you did it. But you know, Yoda still found out about our little mishap with the Gungan city bubble… He gave me so many lectures for a month afterward that I feared I would start talking like him."

Anakin's stiff stance relaxed the more Obi-Wan talked, as he allowed himself to bask in the memory. "That's the reason," he said, smiling for the first time, "I chose to call it 'peace.' "

"Hmm?" Obi-Wan questioned, slightly bemused. "Because I got scolded by Yoda?"

"No! Not at all!"—but Anakin did smile at the thought of Obi-Wan being lectured by a green man one-third his height (if even that)—"It's because it's one of those memories that you look back on, and while they were a pain-in-the—"

"Anakin," Obi-Wan warned. "You have children, and should not be using such vulgar words. Refinement, please."

Anakin rolled his eyes, but replaced the word he was going to use with something more appropriate: "butt at the time, you can look back on them and laugh. Watching that hologram brings back good memories, so many of them, and makes me feel happy. For a few moments, I am allowed this feeling of absolute peace as I drift through the memory. It's a complete feeling, right here." He patted the center of his chest.

Obi-Wan watched Anakin silently for a moment. Then he smiled hesitantly. "You've grown up."

Grinning, Anakin responded, "And you haven't grown at all." He straightened his lengthy form to emphasize their height differences.

"I can't stand being by you when you get into this mode of thinking," Obi-Wan muttered.

"Only because, in doing so, everyone else realizes just how short you are," Anakin teased. "Can't talk yourself out of that situation, now can you? One of your few shortcomings."

Obi-Wan said with astonishment, "Anakin, I believe you've just learned how to make a pun!"—Anakin nodded happily—"And you certainly took your time in doing so. For a while I thought you were too dense to really grasp the concept…" Obi-Wan shook his head in mock sorrow.

Anakin sighed. "Let's get you back to where you belong. Come with me, and I'll show you the proper procedures for entering and exiting. But," Anakin looked at Obi-Wan warningly, "I never want to see you wandering on any floors containing business again. You have been warned: the second time I won't be so forgiving." Anakin's eyes pierced his, almost violent in their intensity. "And don't lie to me again. Ever."

Obi-Wan fought the shiver that threatened to work its way down his spine; for a second he had witnessed Darth Vader.

"Say, Anakin…" Obi-Wan asked as they got into the elevator, "How did you find me?"

"Oh, I have my ways." Anakin looked mysterious and dark, a smile ghosting over his features. A smile that was wrong somehow, on some basic level. A Mona Lisa smile that spoke of secrets. Of knowing.

"Really…" Obi-Wan said nervously, wondering—worrying—if Anakin was hinting at something.

"No." Anakin laughed at the look of perplexity on Obi-Wan's face. "I was just messing with your head, to see how nervous I could get you. Looked like it worked too," Anakin teased, "judging from you expression. In all honesty, I just happened to be going there myself. I was as surprised as you were when I found you."

"So I wasn't the only one nearly having a heart-attack?" Obi-Wan asked hopefully.

Anakin chuckled. "I wasn't quite to that stage yet."

"Oh." Obi-Wan paused. "Me neither."

Anakin laughed.

Obi-Wan sighed, letting his frame sag. He finished pulling on his pajama top and tied the string to his thin cloth pants. Though Anakin hadn't pressed him after the initial volley of questions, Obi-Wan still suffered from the whole ordeal. For Anakin to have found him…he was lucky to still be alive. Or maybe he'd had bad luck, he mused, since it was chance that had allowed Anakin to find him in the first place.

Shrugging it all off as unanswerable, Obi-Wan sat down on his bed. He had avoided spending more time with Anakin on the plea that he was tired and needed rest. The same trick that worked on Leia worked on Anakin, and Obi-Wan was left to his own devices in his room once more. Only, this time he wasn't going to go wandering; all he wanted to do was sleep. His muscles felt heavy and sluggish, as did his mind.

Not even feeling up for meditation, he squirmed under the covers and flicked off the light switch with a little, honed Force push. Darkness enveloped him, and he closed his eyes. Sleep would come when it did; Obi-Wan let his mind float in a half-unconscious, half-conscious state while he waited for the Night Mare to carry him into the realms of dreams.

Just as he was about to drift off to sleep entirely, Obi-Wan heard the faint click of a door opening. Sitting up, breathing heavily, he blindly tried to see what—or who—was there.

"Calm down, it's only me," an amused voice drifted over to him lazily. A lanky form opened the blinds of his window, and the glow of neon lights from the city entered. The luminosity defined the outline of a person. White teeth flashed in a smile, contrasting brilliantly with the darkness.

"Well, 'only you' nearly gave me a heart-attack," Obi-Wan grumbled. "What in heaven's name are you doing here? And how?" He remembered locking his door to keep intruders like this out.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," Anakin said apologetically as he sat down on the side of Obi-Wan's bed. "Didn't you realize that we share a bathroom? There's two doors in it: one leading to your side, one to mine."

"Oh, that explains a lot," Obi-Wan replied faintly. No, he hadn't noticed; he supposed he was so tired that he had overlooked the obvious simply because he hadn't expected it. "Will I be getting many nighttime visits?"

Anakin grinned, and Obi-Wan winced as the sharp flare of white met his night-in-tuned vision. "Never know."

"Well, I would like to get some sleep, and if you continue to disturb me and barge in here unannounced I'm going to be a zombie tomorrow." Obi-Wan pointed at the bathroom door. "I believe you can show yourself to the exit."

Drawing closer, Anakin whispered teasingly, "Grumpy as ever, aren't you? Relax, I just want to talk, to be with you. God, I haven't had a chance like this in so long…"

"A chance like what?" Obi-Wan mumbled into his pillow. He figured if Anakin wasn't going to leave, he was going to try to fall asleep anyways. If he got Anakin to ramble on long enough perhaps his voice could be used as a white noise, and he could finally get some rest.

"A chance like this," Anakin said emphatically.

"I believe you already mentioned that." Obi-Wan yawned and tried to burrow farther into his blankets. However, his tugging didn't do too much good, as Anakin was sitting on the quilt and making it immovable. "Can you scoot over so I can get some more blankets?" Obi-Wan heard the soft rasp of fabric as Anakin got up, and said "thank you" sleepily as he pulled the covers up and over his head. But when a hand gently tugged the blankets off his head, Obi-Wan realized that Anakin had scooted nearer. "I hadn't meant for you to get closer," he grumbled.

"Obi-Wan…at least listen to me for a little while longer," Anakin pleaded, an underlying anger and impatience tingeing his words harshly. It made Obi-Wan wary and silent. "What I mean to say is that I almost never get a chance to be truly, genuinely alone with you. While I love Leia and Luke to death, they sometimes get underfoot, and whenever I try to talk to you at the Jedi Temple there's always a youngling or two hovering about…no matter where we are, there's always someone else around. Right now, right here, it's just the two of us."

"We're both busy people," Obi-Wan spoke through his pillow, "It's only natural that we don't have much time to ourselves."

"But it's not," Anakin said quietly with strong emotion. The anger flitted through Anakin's self-control and revealed itself. "It's not natural that we can't find time to just enjoy each other's company! It drives me mad!" he whispered out harshly. "And you just go about your day, as if you've never been haunted by desires and impulses, as if you've never been plagued with soul-wrenching needs. As if you've never dreamed, only to have that dream twisted into a cruel nightmare when you finally wake to realize it was just that—a dream. Nothing more, nothing less than just a dream."

Anakin moved closer to Obi-Wan, as if by physically closing the distance between them he could do so mentally. "Do you ever feel anything?" Anakin asked in despair. His breath hit Obi-Wan's cheek gently, and it smelled of peppermint toothpaste.

Obi-Wan pulled himself into a sitting position, sensing that this conversation was important to Anakin. "Yes, I feel many things," he said calmly. It was better to let Anakin do most of the talking, and only respond when asked a direct question. He sensed that Anakin had something he desperately wanted to say, and any speech on his part would only agitate Anakin. What Anakin wanted was not conversation, but a listening ear.

Anakin rounded on him. "But what?"

Obi-Wan paused, thinking. He said painstakingly slow, "Love, compassion, friendship—and yes, sometimes anger, regret, and impatience. Feelings are a natural part of life. You just have to accept them as they come, and then move on."

"But what if you aren't supposed to move on," Anakin argued heatedly, making sure to keep his voice down. If Obi-Wan's voice was the steadiness of the turtle, Anakin's was the frantic pace of the hare. "What if you're meant to remember, and let all those emotions build up? They are a part of the soul. You can't simply discard them one by one as you are done with them. Feelings keep us alive. By letting them go, you're letting go of pieces of your life. You're slowly killing yourself."

Obi-Wan said nothing. Anakin was not seeking Obi-Wan's truthful opinion; he was seeking comfort. Since Obi-Wan didn't have the heart to give him false comfort or harsh truth, he let his silence speak for him.

Anakin whispered quietly, wildly, "I won't let my life drift away from me—I refuse to die." And suddenly Anakin's lips were crashing down on Obi-Wan's.

Obi-Wan jerked back instantly, cracking his head against the wooden frame of his bed before he shrunk down against his pillow. Anakin's arms boxed him in on both sides. "What are you doing?" Obi-Wan whispered harshly. "Have you gone mad?"

Anakin leaned down closer to Obi-Wan, letting his cool breath ghost over Obi-Wan's cheek. "More desperate than mad." He smiled down at Obi-Wan. "My love fuels my desperation." He shifted until more of his upper body was hovering over Obi-Wan's blanketed, prone form. "I need to be with you. Every day that you're away—and then when I see you again—yes, I guess I am mad." Anakin chuckled, the sound rumbling around in his chest before bubbling up his throat and rolling off his lips.

Obi-Wan hissed out, "Get off me this instant, Anakin Skywalker! I won't partake in this—in these carnal desires of yours!"

Anakin was stung; he looked at Obi-Wan through hurtful, betrayed eyes. "It's nothing like that. This isn't about physical pleasures…it's about here"—for the second time that night, Anakin patted the center of his chest—"It's about love. If you don't want to kiss, if you don't feel comfortable with intimate contact, that's all right. Just hold my hand, talk to me, smile at me…" Anakin murmured persuasively, "Anything to sooth this desperate need in me." The Coruscanti traffic sent bursts of sporadic light into the room, illuminating and darkening Anakin's pale blue eyes and their hungry need.

Obi-Wan sighed. He quieted his initial shock and tried to make the best of the worst situation possible. He commanded calmly, "Anakin, get off of me." Like a man who couldn't help but obey orders, Anakin slowly got up from his leaning position to become seated upright again. "Now, we need to talk this out in a reasonable fashion."

"Reasonable!" Anakin barked a laugh. "You have too much reason and not enough feeling, Obi-Wan." He reached out a hand as if to trace Obi-Wan's cheekbone, but withdrew it at Obi-Wan's glare.

"Keep your voice down so you don't wake the children," Obi-Wan warned him. "I think this is all a misunderstanding—"

Anakin snorted.

"—and you have confused your feelings," Obi-Wan continued, completely ignoring Anakin's disrespectful interruption. "The bond between Master and Padawan is very strong and complex. Because of that, Padawans often misdirect their thinking by labeling that bond a simpler emotion, say 'love,' as is your case."

"I know what I feel," Anakin said harshly. "I know what is real. Stop trying to analyze it—to analyze me."

"Anakin, calm down…you aren't the first person to make this mistake and you certainly won't be the last. I myself made this mistake once."—Obi-Wan noticed the flicker of hope in Anakin's eyes, so he clarified his meaning—"It was with my own Master. What you are really feeling is a mixture of brotherhood, a father-son relationship, friendship, platonic love, respect, admiration, and trust, among other things—there are too many to name them all. You have simply lumped all these emotions together and wrongly named them 'passionate love.'

"It's not uncommon, and I think that every Padawan has suffered from this at least once in their life. To have lived in what was like a small community, doing everything together…training together, eating together, growing up together, and then to gain a Master, who focuses solely on you and gives you a taste of what family and individuality are… You experience so many new emotions all at once and don't know what to do with them. And then you add in the adolescent longing for physical comfort—and here is this knowledgeable, older person who's looking out for you, who you look up to…" Obi-Wan stopped, realizing he had begun to drift off track. "Yes, it is a mistake that every Padawan must make, and overcome, to become a Jedi Knight."

But Anakin hadn't heard the last part; one unbearable thought kept echoing in his head, deafening him to everything else Obi-Wan said. "You felt…this way about Qui-Gon?" The night, while cloaking his face, could do nothing to hide his jealousy and anger.

"You're not listening to me…" Obi-Wan sighed again, his breath whistling out between his teeth. "What you think of as 'this' is nothing more and nothing less than the training bond that all Masters and Padawans create and share. It is the deep, soulful connection that links us together. It is a spiritual bond, not a physical passion."

"If you've already felt this, then why can't you just accept my feelings for what they are?" Anakin demanded angrily. "You know my sufferings; why won't you lessen them? You can…just a word, just a look is all I ask for." Desperation.

Obi-Wan wouldn't look at Anakin. Instead he gazed outside, into the dazzling whorl of colors that was made up of speeding hovercrafts and neon lights.

"I am a Jedi foremost."

It broke Obi-Wan's heart to deny Anakin that small comfort which he begged for. But he knew that Anakin would be better off in the end if Obi-Wan terminated this senseless infatuation before it truly blossomed—even a word or two could have destructive results. He wouldn't allow Anakin to travel down this path of self- devastation.

"I'm sorry, Anakin, I truly am," Obi-Wan said with honest regret.

"Not nearly enough," Anakin spat out.

Anakin stalked out of the room, leaving Obi-Wan to his thoughts and flashes of Coruscanti traffic headlights, and eventually to restless sleep.