so guess what? I'm updating again!

I SAW GOF AND IT WAS AMAZING! Definitely the BEST so far. I am absolutely in LOVE with Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Tom Felton. They are the HOTTEST guys EVER. (loved the bath scene too, hahahaha)

Chapter 9---This Coldness Of Us is Killing Me

Once Katie saw Lily's tear-stained face she jumped up and ran over.

"Lily, what happened?" She hugged her best friend tightly.

"It's over, Katie, I ruined it and didn't even do anything!" Lily sobbed harder than ever as Katie hugged her. "It's over…"

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Lily lay on the soft scarlet couch in the Gryffindor common room. Her tears had ceased, but she felt this sadness she couldn't shake off. Katie had gotten her a blanket from the girls' dorm and Lily lay there, staring out the icy window. Other students in the common room left her alone, which Lily was grateful for. They had all seen her sob with Katie for almost an hour, and knew better than to bring it up again.

The other Marauders were somewhere with James. The last time Lily saw him was when she saw his pale, horrified face. She couldn't put that picture out of her head. She didn't know how long she was lying there, but she noticed it slowly getting darker outside. Katie emerged through the portrait and over to Lily.

"Hi, Lils." She said softly, sitting on the floor in front of Lily, a sympathetic expression on her face.

"Hi." Lily said back.

"You okay?" Katie asked. "No, stupid question, of course you're not. Do you want anything? Are you hungry?" Lily shook her head.

"Can I stay here tonight?" Lily asked.

"Of course, do you need anything from your room?"

"I just need my pajamas and toothbrush, but I can get it if you want."

"No, don't worry about it, I'll get it."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

James lay on the couch in the Heads common room, his arms tucked behind his head. Sirius, Remus and Peter were sitting on the furniture around him, but they were silent until Sirius spoke.

"She talked to me the other day, you know?" He told James. James turned his head to face Sirius.

"She did? About what?"

"Jason." James turned his head back to face the ceiling.

"She seemed upset." Sirius continued. "He told her he liked her, but she said she loved you."

"Well if she loved me, she wouldn't be snogging with him." James said, toneless.

"Did you ever think it wasn't her fault?" Sirius asked. James propped himself up on his elbows.

"Aren't you supposed to be on my side, Sirius?"

"I am, but you don't know what happened, Prongs."

"Sirius! I saw what I saw!" James snapped. "They were kissing like lovers!" Sirius blew his dark hair out of his eyes and exchanged glances with Remus. They fell silent again.

"Do you know what Jason is like?" Sirius spoke again.

"I know girls think he's good looking! Lily could have fallen for him too!"

"Prongs, it's Lily, we're talking about. It took her six years to fall in love with you!" Sirius regretted saying that after it came out. James looked at him with stony silence.

"And you see how long that lasted now, do you?" He finally whispered. Sirius exhaled quickly.

"When she came to the Gryffindor common room, she was hysterical. Sobbing all over the place and shaking. If she was over you, she wouldn't have come running after you!" Sirius continued.

"Sirius, stop it!" James yelled. "You're acting as if YOU'RE in love with her!"

"I'm not, James, hate to tell you, but I love Katie!" Sirius defended himself.

"Yeah, sure you do! You've been with how many girls since first year? 20? 30? How long will Katie last with you? James spat. Sirius didn't respond until a few seconds later.

"Forever. Because I really love her. Like you love Lily. She loves me. Like Lily loves you." He whispered.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Katie came outside the Heads dorm to year James and Sirius yelling at each other. At Sirius's last words, she bit her lip, but then smiled before saying the password. She entered the room, but there was a tense silence among the guys.

"Sorry. I'm just getting Lily's things." She said before marching up the staircase to Lily's room. She grabbed pajamas and the toothbrush and went downstairs.

"I heard part of your conversation." She confessed. "Sirius is right, you know. I'm worried about Lily right now. She's not talking or eating. Just lying on the couch. So think about what Sirius said."

Lily was sitting by the fireplace, knees hugged to her chest and wrapped around a blanket when Katie came back. Her face was glowing with the warmth of the fire.

"How are you doing?" She asked.

"I'm, erm, alright, I suppose." Lily answered.

"I think I'm going to head to bed, it's getting late, and we've got class tomorrow. Will you be alright?" Lily nodded in response and kept staring at the fire, listening to Katie's footsteps up the stairs.

A while later, Lily was still sitting by the fire, and Sirius and Remus returned and Lily didn't hear. Sirius motioned for Remus to go ahead. He walked quietly up to Lily and sat down next to her.

"Hey." He whispered.

"Hey." She said, resting her chin on her knees.

"Are you doing alright?" He asked her and she shrugged.

"How's James?"

"He's well. Upset."

"Yeah. I don't know what to say. It really wasn't my fault."

"I believe you." Sirius said and she turned her head to face him.

"Really?" He nodded. "I just wish James would." She said, her voice beginning to choke again.

"We'll get him to, Lily." He said, wrapping his arm around her. She put her head on his shoulder and let her tears fall quietly.

"Thank you Sirius. You're the best friend ever." He just squeezed her shoulder as the tears streamed down her cheeks.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

James woke with a start the next morning. He slowly remembered what happened the day before and fell back onto his bed. He didn't feel like lazing around all day, so he got up and took a hot shower, then realized it was only 7 o' clock. Classes didn't start until 9. He walked out into the cold and jogged to the Quidditch pitch. He grabbed his broom out of the locker room, and a practice Snitch. He flew around faster than ever, trying to leave his memories of yesterday behind, stopping only when he grew numb from the February coldness.

Lily woke up disoriented. She was cold and had a headache. The dorm was empty, and she figured everyone was at breakfast, but when she looked Katie's clock, it was already 9:45. "Damn!" She swore and threw on her school robes, checking in the mirror to make sure her hair looked okay, since she didn't have time to shower. She was already very late to Transfiguration. She ran a brush through her hair and stumbled out of the deserted common room.

She ran to Transfiguration and burst open through the door, everyone turning around to look at her.

"I-I'm sorry Professor, I didn't realize I never set an alarm to wake up." Lily apologized.

"Just have a seat please, Miss Evans." McGonagall sighed. Lily walked up to the table where Katie was sitting and sat next to her.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" She whispered.

"You looked tired. When did you get to bed?"

"I think it was around two."

"Well that's why. You had a rough day yesterday and I figured you needed your sleep. You're smart enough to catch up in class." Katie told her.

"Ladies! Hush!" McGonagall stared at them.

Lily turned her head sideways and saw James staring at her, but as soon as he saw her look, he quickly tore his eyes away, staring at the front of the class with a stony expression. Lily looked down and her eyes became watery, but she tried to concentrate on McGonagall's lesson.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

James was wondering where Lily was. She never missed a lesson and that worried him, but he didn't show it. The door suddenly burst open and Lily came in the classroom. James was instantly shocked. Her eyes were bloodshot and swollen, with huge dark circles around them. He watched McGonagall's face turn to slight surprise when she saw Lily, so she excused her tardiness.

He didn't know what to do. He found his eyes turned towards Lily, but once she caught his, a coldness swept over it and he tore his eyes away. He snuck a quick peek at Lily's reaction. She was facing the desk with her eyes watery.

But James didn't care. She hurt him. He needed to hurt her back.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Lily sat in the Gryffindor common room, working on her Charms essay, while everyone went to lunch. She wasn't hungry anymore. She felt constantly tired and all she wanted to do was to sleep. However, she wanted to be strong, she wanted to show James she could be strong against his hurtfulness towards her. She wished she could just talk to him, tell him about the conversation she had with Jason, and why he kissed her.

The portrait opened, and the Marauders and Katie came through.

"James! I need to talk to you, please!" She cried.

"Sorry, Evans, I've got Arithmancy." She said coldly, using her last name as he had done for six years. Lily exhaled deeply, determined not to cry in front of him.

"Listen to me! I didn't do anything! He did it all! I had nothing to do with it! LISTEN!" She screamed. James just stared at her screaming body, expressionless. "All I did was turn my head to face him and he kissed me! I DID NOTHING!" The tears started falling. James shook his head, walked out of the common room and slammed the portrait behind him. They heard the fat lady yell, "Hey, watch it, Mr. Potter!" and James roaring in return "SHUT UP!" Lily tried not to cry, causing her face to crumple. Everyone in the common room was silent and staring at her. She felt dizzy and black spots appeared in her eyes. She felt herself going weak.

"Lily!" She faintly heard Katie's worried voice, and before she hit the ground, she felt Sirius's strong arms catching her. Then everything became black.

Lily woke up and found herself on the couch. She saw Sirius draped lazily over on the other couch, reading his Charms book. He felt eyes on him and looked over in Lily's direction.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked. She sat up and nodded.

"Where is everyone?"

"Class." He answered, and she remembered that she and Sirius were the only ones with the free period now.

"I made a fool out of myself didn't I?" She asked, looking up at the ceiling.

"You're upset Lily, and James isn't listening to you. You've never had to go through this before. That guy you dated in 5th year, you broke up with him. The one in 6th year, well he broke up with you but you hated him anyway. You're new at this. Don't worry about it. I'm surprised at James though, he wanted you for so long, he got you and now he won't give you the time of day."

"Yeah." Was all Lily said in response. "Sirius, I need your help." She eventually said.

"Yeah, I know Lils, I've been trying to think of ways to talk to James, but he is so incredibly stubborn."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Lily had a plan. It wasn't one that took a lot of skill, but she had it. It was simple. James thought she wasn't coming to the Heads dorm again, so she would 'surprise' him by being in there and cornering him. She heard someone tapping the portrait and then "James Potter" and she got ready. Sure enough, he was surprised to see her there, but tried to keep going to his room.

"Wait." Lily said. James reached the staircase but froze. "Please, can I just talk to you. You don't have to talk to me, but I just need you know everything. Please, James." She looked into his eyes, which she knew would weaken him. He stepped down and walked over to her.

"Fine."

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So what did you think? I think it's been my longest chapter yet, so I hope it was good and up to your standards! I've been working really hard. I have never updated 3 times in 4 days before…so please appreciate that! Please review also!

Thank you sunkissed017, Lyny Angell, Livin 4 Dancin, Teresa Hughes and Potterchick1 for reviewing. It meant a lot to me to get your reviews! Thanks!

Much Love,

HPF670