-1Seven
"Desire, Wishes, and Tears"
Damn, I took too long to update this one. Well I hope you like it, I have poured my mind to update it!
Disclaimer: Yu Yu Hakusho is not mine, and neither is Gundam Wing.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
All my hopes, my prayers, are you
To hold you in my arms
To love you
Never to see your pure soulful eyes
Looking at me with affection
Forever to be on the other end
Seeing you and your beauty
Never to have you
"Shut the fuck up wise ass!" Yusuke shouted.
"It's not my fault you're obviously glowing." Hiei said.
"I am not glowing short shit!" Yusuke retorted.
"I'm gonna have to go with Shorty, you look different." Kuwabara said.
"Who the hell asked you?" Yusuke said making a fist.
"Would all of you just shut the hell up!" Wufei yelled from over his book. "Unlike you all I'm trying to do something productive with my mind!"
"Sh, sorry." Yusuke snorted.
"What's up Spiky?" Yusuke said plopping on the sofa next to me.
"Nothing and what do want to know?" I said knowing Yusuke was going to ask me something.
"What's a good word for 'complete joy'?" he asked.
"Well, I would have to say bliss, yes I think bliss is a good word." I said nodding.
"Bliss, yeah that word fits. Thanks Spiky!" Yusuke said patting me on the back friendly.
"Fits for what?" I asked curious on the sudden mood swing.
"Promise not to tell?" Yusuke said looking around, obviously to make sure no one was within earshot.
"Yes." I answered.
"I am now officially hooked up with Jin. Just yesterday we kind of sealed it. I've never felt so happy, so I was wondering a good word to describe what I feel." Yusuke said laxly.
"Hm…congratulations." I said giving a small smile.
"Thanks." Yusuke said and stood and walked off.
If only I was so lucky. To be able to hold the one I love. I guess it's better this way. At least I wont make him miserable. I think I could only bring him that. I could never make him happy. I'm too emotionless. He probably, no he does hate me. I'm lucky that Yusuke, Hiei, Kuwabara, and Heero enjoy my company. At least I know Yusuke does. I'm not sure about the others. How I wish I could hold him. He's so flawless and beautiful. He's the absolute purity and kindness. I guess he'd have to be to be carrying Charity as his title. Charity. Tolerance, compassion, generosity, benevolence, consideration. He's a perect being in my eyes. He probably wants to see me gone. He doesn't even know me. The real me. I mean all of us assumed that they actually lived their titles. Then we met Jin, Kurama, and Duo. In a sense they do, but they also carry other personalities. I know for sure though that Quatre does live up to his title. He probably thinks I do too. What's odd though, is that I have never lived up to my title. Greed. Only the aspect that I crave him and want him to myself. Other than that, I have no Greed. I really don't even considerate Greed, I love him.
"You okay?" said a husky voice behind me.
"Huh? Oh, I'm fine Heero, I'm just thinking." I answered.
"You seemed sad, is all." Heero said, slight concern visible in his eyes.
"No, I'm just thinking, and I think I'll go for a walk, to clear my mind." I said standing.
"Ok, but be careful." Yusuke said walking in the room. I smile and nodded. Yusuke is by far my greatest friend. He maybe a bit rough and crude, but if you get past that he's just lonely and defensive. I'm glad he found someone. At least one of us is happy.
When I left I just started walking aimlessly in the streets. If only suicide was an option, but we are all immortal. We can only be killed by our opposites, not by our own kind or ourselves. Sin can kill virtue, and virtue can kill sin. Sin cannot kill sin or themselves, and virtue cannot kill virtue or themselves. I know that because I have tried countless times to take my life, and I have seen it. Wufei and Yusuke were fighting savagely, Wufei had actually stabbed Yusuke straight through his heart, somehow Yusuke lived. Then Yusuke had reversed the sabre and slashed Wufei's throat deep. They both lived. Then later in the years many other fights insued amongst ourselves. Yet somehow we cannot die when we try to kill each other. I thinks it's only logical that it's the same with the Virtues.
I continued to walk with no real destination, when I heard, "Please, think about his! If you continue to do what you're doing, you'll be forever plagued with the thought that you killed someone! Living with that on your conscience will only bring pain and suffering!" I went to where I heard that, and when I saw who belonged to that voice I almost melted. So that's how his voice sounded. Just as angelic as it's owner. He sounded so heavenly.
"Like I give a shit about my conscience! You're pissing me off fruitcake. First you lecture me on stealing and now you're lecturing me on this! I don't give a shit fucking faggot!" a man with a gun said holding Quatre against a wall. Obviously I was angered that he was talking to my angel like that. I quietly snuck up behind the man and grabbed his arm and slammed him to the floor.
"It's rude to threaten someone who's just trying to help. Even more disrespectful to speak to them in such unruly manner!" I said holding his arm tightly making him cry in pain.
"Fine I give!" he cried dropping his gun. I let go of him. He ran off holding his arm and looking back at me.
"Thanks, I guess. Why did you help me?" Quatre asked rubbing his neck, where the man had grabbed him.
"You're welcome, and I helped you because you needed it." I said and started walking away when he grabbed my arm.
"But you're a Sin! Why would you help me?" he said looking confused.
"I know you probably won't believe me, but not all of us are bad. Kurama, Jin, and Duo have already met us. The only bad ones are Anger and Envy. We all get along quite well. I helped you because I have a great respect for you." I said.
"Really? But, I always thought that-"
"We were evil? That we are like our sins? We are not all like our sins. Just like Jin and Duo aren't exactly innocent. We aren't all bad." I said, he just smiled and chuckled a little.
"I guess you're right. I guess it is a little foolish that I thought that. I'm sorry, I misjudged you all. I can tell you're telling the truth. Your eyes can tell all." he said.
"Most think my eyes are emotionless." I said curiously. He shook his head.
"No, your eyes are, to me, very full of emotion. Your eyes look sad and full of strong longing and compassion." he said.
"Longing?"
"Yes, like you really want something that you can't seem to have, so it hurts you."
"If only you knew." I said and looked at the floor.
"What do you mean by that?" he asked.
"If I tell, do you promise not to hate me?" I said looking at his beautiful eyes.
"Yes." he said a little unsure.
"We have been in this battle for millennias, we have been forced to fight each other, by our gods. Through this whole battle, I have been forced to cope with my heart and fight the one I have loved since first sight. I'm forced to forever battle that person and go against what my heart wants. I can only hope that this battle ends soon, so that I can finally be free of guilt." I said leaning against the wall.
"And this person is?" he asked uncertainly. I looked up from the floor and straight into his eyes. I felt my heart wrench and I let two small tears fall. How I love him. When he finally let it process in his mind his eyes went wide and he blushed. He's so beautiful and adorable. If only I could hold him without him running.
"You love me?" he squeaked. I nodded slowly. "Why?"
"Because to me you are the embodiment of absolute purity. Complete beauty and perfection. You are everything I could want and need. I only seem to feel pain and sorrow, but when I see you I can't help but feel immense bliss and love. You are intellectual and caring. You are my angel. I'm sorry if this is all too much. I should just leave." I said catching myself and I turned and left not looking at him.
"Wait." he called, I turned, to se his eyes full of emotion. "Do really mean all that? That you love me?"
"Yes every word. I love you and I know I always will." I said looking at him directly into his eyes.
"That's why when we fight, you never harm me, isn't it?" he said, in complete realization.
"Yes. I can't seem to bring myself to harm you in anyway." I said.
"All this time…I always wondered why you never hurt me." he said smiling. "I'm glad I know now."
"If it's not too much, can I, can I kiss you?" I said shyly.
"Sure." he said blushing. I slowly went to him and quickly felt my body heat up even before I touched him. I gently placed my lips on his and was about to part when he gently held my face. We kissed that innocent kiss for what felt like hours. The when we parted, he blushed. I smiled kindly.
"Thank you for not hurting me." I said.
"You really are sad, aren't you." he said looking at me sadly.
"Yes. I've only known pain." I said.
"Well, from now on promise me to smile more. You're so much more beautiful when you smile." he said smiling. I felt myself blush deep and turn away. He chuckled gently and said, "I know we'd have to hide and sneak around, but if it's fine with you, I'd actually like to stay with you." I automatically looked up at him to see if he was lying, but he was serious, he actually wanted to stay with me.
"You'd actually want to be with me?" I said not believing he's actually want me.
"Yes. You see I've always felt something for you, I'm not sure if it's love, but I know I have never hated you. I like how I feel right now, and I feel like this forever." he said wrapping his arms around me.
"I'll stay with you for eternity, and even longer than that." I said holding him back.
We remained like that till nightfall. I felt like a huge weight had left me. My angel saved me, but now I understand how the others must feel. Having to hide their relationship. All I wanted to do was tell the world, but it must remain secret, or I'll never see him again. I can only hope that this will end well.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Well that's the chapter. I beg of you, please, please review. I want to know if I should continue or just dump the story. Ok? Love ya'!