Chapter 22
Blink. Flash. Groan. Pattering. Beeping.
Beep… beep… beep.
Blink. Flash.
"Ugh…" Remy's body ached with pain as he attempted to move, only to feel the scrape of medical bandages wrapped around every movable part of his body. Now he knew what a mummy felt like.
"Do not try moving," Hank soothed in his doctor tone. "You took quite a beating, I'm afraid."
Remy kept his eyes shut, fearing the worst. What if his eyesight hadn't returned? "How long have I been out?"
"A total of three days. You faded in and out of consciousness several times during that period. Am I to assume you don't remember?"
"Uh-huh."
"You suffered some head trauma, had some respiratory problems and you loss an excessive amount of blood, but it's looking good for you Remy," Hank said, his voice lightening up. He was always great for that – ever the optimist. "You should be in tip-top condition in a week or so."
Remy nodded weakly, his eyes still shut. "How is she?"
On the other side of Remy's closed eyelids, Hank's hopeful demeanor faded away. "She's in much worse condition, Remy," he answered gravely.
Remy's heart skipped a beat and it could be heard on his heart monitor. "How so?" he managed to croak out. His throat was suddenly drier than it had been seconds before.
"She's in a light coma… do you remember anything about that night?"
"I remember holdin' her – an' losin' her – an' feelin' her go overload…"
"That's an accurate way to describe what happened. Rogue's powers – meaning those she had absorbed in the past – were too in tune with her emotions. She brought down the building with a final blast of everything mixed." Hank paused for a moment as he sadly dredged up the memory of checking the debris.
As he and Kitty had been the first towards the office building, they were violently knocked back when it suddenly exploded. Hank and she quickly recovered from the stun of the blast and ran straight into the wreckage. Kitty grabbed Hank's hand and together, they searched.
It didn't take long to find Rogue. She was suspended in the air, as if she were lying on an invisible bed at a forty-five degree angle. Her head was tipped back, agony etched across her face.
"It looks like a scene from 'the Exorcist'…" Kitty mumbled. She half expected the scene to be concluded with the moonlight shining through the broken roof onto the younger girl. She shuddered as she ran over to Rogue, while Hank stayed back and found Remy. The other mutants were making their way through the rubble.
Kitty reached Rogue, her breath caught in her throat. "Honey…?" She reached out to touch Rogue's face with her gloved hand. Kitty unconsciously turned herself intangible when she literally felt a shield around the young girl. Kitty in no way had any sort of psychic abilities, but Rogue was still expelling so much power that it was practically tangible. She had locked herself inside herself. "Rogue… can you hear me?"
Rogue's body began to turn upright as if she was waking up. Her arms fell to her sides, still hanging limply as they were when she was suspended. Kurt's jacket lay in tatters among her pale body. The stringy pieces of cloth bounced slightly when her feet touched the ground. Somehow, she stood upright, though she appeared so fragile. If someone were to tap her, she'd collapse on sight.
Her head was lowered to the ground. Kitty opened her mouth to call to her again, but instead a small voice made it to the young woman's ears. "Kitty?"
"Yes, Rogue. It's Kitty. Are you okay?" Kitty tried her best to hold in her excitement that Rogue was capable of speaking.
"Ah don't know… Is he dead?"
"Who?" Kitty quickly glanced around on the floor amongst the debris. Bobby was in the process of clearing up a large pile of cement and wood.
"Eww…" he muttered as he picked up a final piece. "I'm gonna guess this was Victor…"
Paige walked up next to him. "Oh mah…" She held a hand to her lips as she swallowed the bile that had risen in her throat.
Kitty looked back to Rogue. "Victor's dead, honey. It's over."
Rogue slightly shook her head. "Is Remy okay?" she asked. He was her main concern. A tiny light sparked inside her mind, in all the darkness. Is he really dead? Did he kill Remy befoh Ah - gulp – killed him?
Once again, Kitty looked over her shoulder to check on Hank's progress with Remy. She had previously been oblivious to Remy's well being and now that she took in a full gander of what exactly happened to him, she couldn't be too sure if he would survive. Biting her lip, she turned back to Rogue. "He's going to be fine, honey. You should rest. You were so strong despite it all."
"Where's Kurt?" Rogue asked, ignoring Kitty's comments. She had no time for Kitty's bullshit.
Kitty blinked. She hadn't thought of Kurt. "I'm not sure."
Rogue slowly raised her head to look Kitty in the eye. "Find him," she ordered, her voice low and full of threats. It didn't sound like Rogue. Her eyes averted to where Remy laid, tears pooling in her sockets immediately. "No," she breathed. She took a step over towards him, but instantly fell over herself. She collapsed to the ground, her leg bending unnaturally.
Through gritted teeth, Rogue sobbed Remy's name. She was so weak. Remy? Can ya hear me? She felt empty again. Quickly, she glanced around her mind. The 'closet door' was hanging off its hinges from being broken open before. Regardless, there wasn't a single speck of residue in there. Rogue was tapped dry. Ah need ta touch someone… a psycho! Her eyes averted back and forth. "Jean?" she numbly called out, hoping the psychic was within hearing distance.
Jean heard her from across the room. She levitated herself and flew to Rogue over all the debris. As Jean passed by Betsy, the violet-haired psychic's mind tingled. "I've got a track on Kurt."
Scott stood next to her. "Where is he? Is he okay?"
"Physically… he's fine." She spared a glance towards Rogue, her Asian features visibly depressing. "This is beyond horrible now," she said softly as she turned away from Scott.
Jean knelt down next to Rogue. She could sense the girl's anguish and her inability to keep herself awake. "You need to sleep," Jean whispered maternally.
Rogue had two coherent thought processes at that moment. One, she needed to know if Remy was okay. Two, she despised Jean in that moment. It hurt to listen to hear Jean talk that way. How dare she feel like she can fill the void in Rogue's heart so soon? With a mental growl, Rogue felt that absorbing Jean would be all the more justified…
Rogue's hand slowly reached out to Jean. The redhead smiled warmly and accepted the hand in her own. Carefully, she pulled Rogue into a hug. Ah need ta talk ta Remy, Rogue thought harshly.
"Sleep, hun." She could sense Jean sending a psychic probe her way.
"No," Rogue wearily said as she flopped her bare arm against Jean's face.
Jean shrieked as if she'd been burned with scalding acid and recoiled out of Rogue's reach. That being Rogue's last bit of energy, she fell out of Jean's arms and onto the ground.
One last coherent thought flowed through her mind before she passed out. Ah'm sorry, Remy.
He didn't stir as if he'd heard her. Jean was not weakened at all, just shaken up. Rogue's powers were once again gone.
"… She hasn't woken up at all… her life signs are faint. Her blood… it's been mutated. Victor used an advanced strand of mutant DNA that's been manipulated into a form of ability negation… There was no way he did all this alone." Hank wasn't sure if Remy was listening to him ramble on, but Hank didn't necessarily care. The last three days had been hell for him. The stress of caring for the two Southerners was taking its toll on him. Remy would recover, but could Hank be so sure about Rogue?
"Henri?"
"Yes, Remy?"
"… Any idea if my eyes are workin'? I don' wanna open dem only t' found out dey don'."
"I didn't know that you'd been blinded."
"Rogue manifested Alison's power an' I didn' close m' eyes."
"I see… Well, I didn't know to check while you were unconscious, not that it would have made a difference. When I did hold a light to your eyes, they didn't react." Remy sighed heavily. "That was two days ago, however. You should try – slowly – opening your eyes." Hank walked over to his beside. "What could you see before – color wise?"
"Bright white."
"Okay…" Remy heard some shuffling of paper. "Open your eyes."
Remy scrunched his face up, afraid to relax the least bit. What if he still couldn't see? Maybe it would be permanent? Clenching his jaw, he sucked up the last bit of courage he had and cracked open his right eye. He did the same with his left.
"You're going to have to do better than that, Remy," Hank laughed.
Remy breathed slowly and opened his eyes fully. Red. Dark, almost bloody… but wonderful red. He turned his head to his right and saw Hank, grinning hopefully all in his blue glory and his white doctor coat. "Henri, I c'n see!"
"That is terrific, Remy!"
Remy's exuberance was short lived, however. Once he had gotten over the wonderful fact he could see again, his view reflexively found Rogue's position in the room. She was lying in a bed identical to his, alone. She was pale – her lips almost indistinguishable against her chalk-like skin. Her arms were still at her sides as if someone had just put them there. Remy knew how she slept. She liked to sleep on her side with an arm propped underneath her pillow, supporting her head. Looking at her like that – It's like she already be dead, Remy thought harshly.
"I t'ink I'd be pushin' it if I asked t' go ov'r dere, right?"
"Just a bit, Remy. You must remain in bed for at least another day or so until your concussion passes. If you were to stand up, you'd feel something similar to vertigo."
"Merde. T'anks," he replied, though he didn't know why. All he could do was stare at Rogue. That's all he had left now.
Rogue played with the door hanging off the hinge. "Stupid door," she muttered to no one. She knew no one would hear her. She'd been playing with the door for hours on end. It was the only thing to occupy herself with. She wanted to fix it – but hadn't found the proper tools to do so. It was aggravating to say the least.
Sighing heavily, she stood up and dusted off her legs. She was still in the tatters of Kurt's jacket and her underwear. Feeling slightly self-conscious despite her obvious aloneness, she thought warm thoughts and covered herself up in her normal clothing. Smiling to herself now that she was in comfortable black pants and a red turtleneck, she began to walk. Where? She didn't know. It was better than fumbling with a broken door. Realizing then she could have easily created tools to fix the door, she walked away anyway. That door was becoming the scorn of her existence in her own mind, and she wanted out.
Remy had fallen asleep for a couple hours, even though Hank had strongly disagreed with him doing so. The doctor was not about to inject Remy with any stimulant however.
He began to blink, though it was dark unlike when Remy had first woken up. He hadn't a single clue what time it was. The lighting in the medical room was dim, as if Hank had just left for nighttime. Remy sighed, and picked up a faint trace of sulfur and brimstone lingering in his nose. He sniffed more obviously and he felt movement in the room. "Kurt?" he called, hoping that the elf-like mutant was in his presence.
"Hey," Kurt replied, moving over to Remy's side of the room. He had been no doubt sitting with Rogue. Remy remembered what he had thought way back before they'd entered the office building that fateful night. Raven was gone, and Rogue was on the brink of wherever.
His anchor to the world would be demolished.
"… I'm sorry, mon ami." Remy couldn't think of anything else to say.
Kurt shrugged. "Heh, what could you do to save her? We both tried our best… I feel so guilty for getting out of the building before it came down..."
"I was talkin' 'bout y' maman. Rogue isn' gone yet," Remy said softly, reassuringly.
Remy felt Kurt's bottom lip trembling. It was like a hammering against his skin. His empathy was slowly building back up with every second he was awake, and the tense emotions in the institute weren't helping at all.
Kurt brought his fangs on top of it to hide the motion but it was futile. Remy slowly pushed himself up into an upright position with a painful groan and stiffly brought his arms around Kurt. "Let it out, mon frere."
Kurt nodded numbly and buried his head into Remy's shoulder. "I miss her so much," he whispered before the tears started to fall. Remy nodded, unsure of what to say. "To see her… just lying there that night… I – I couldn't think. And then, when the building started to fall, I just grabbed her and p-p-ported out." His sobbing was beginning to affect his speech. "I w-w-was away from the building when it ca-ame down and –" he sniffled loudly, "her blood just started to stain the snow! It was horrible, Remy!" Kurt's limber body began to shake with the turbulence of his weeping.
He pulled away from Remy to hold out his hand. "I held m-my hand out like this to her skin… we would always say how we matched perfectly. Rogue would always feel left out because she didn't look like us." The hand shook with tremors as Kurt attempted to keep it steady. "She was so pale." He breathed in hard to keep his voice strong. "She didn't look like either of us then. She was pale like a blue sky… like a mixture of light and dark when the sunsets minus the extra colors." He took another shuddering breath. "Even though she was dead… she was beautiful. And I knew that she loved me. Rogue sent her feelings over to me that night right before I went for the body… And… And as sick as it sounds, I just held her body in the snow. I don't know how long it was before the others found me.
"I remember Logan coming up to me and just kneeling before me." His voice was gaining strength once again. Remy had the inkling that Kurt hadn't talked to anyone about what had happened at all. He didn't mind that he was the one Kurt had chosen to confide in. He was actually flattered, but a bit concerned. Kurt had held this on himself for three days. What kind of thoughts had gone through his head in those seventy-two hours? "… He didn't say anything… just sat with his head bowed. I looked up at him and his head was still healing."
Kurt paused for a moment and Remy's blazing red eyes met those golden ones of Kurt's. "He was holding my mother's hand… He cried. I couldn't figure out why. I'd never seen him let his guard down like that before." Kurt rubbed his tear stained cheeks. The fur was beginning to mat in weird ways from the wetness. "Then he said to me 'He's dead, Kurt.' I could only nod and let it be that. I saw blood on Logan's knuckles and didn't know whether it was his own, or my mom's or Victor's. It was over."
"It is over," Remy reassured him. "We jus' have t' wait f'r Rogue t' wake up an' make sure she knows dat."
"Hank says he has no idea when she will wake up."
Remy sighed. "I know. Dat's gon' be de hardest part."
"Yeah." Kurt glanced back over his shoulder to his sister while Remy did the same. Her appearance hadn't changed at all. Her chest rose slightly with each breath thanks to the life support system she was on.
"Hey, Kurt?"
He looked back at Remy. "Hm?"
"Wan' play some cards t' kill some time? I don' feel like sleepin' anymore."
Weakly, Kurt nodded. "Do you mind something fast paced?"
"Anyt'in' wit' a lot of t'inkin'," Remy smirked. "C'n y' run t' my room an' grab a deck?"
"Sure. Give me thirty seconds." Remy could've sworn he saw a small smile on the elfish face of Kurt right before he teleported out of his sight. It was the first smile he'd seen on Kurt since before the incident.
With Kurt gone, all that was left to do was once again start at Rogue. She hadn't changed at all – not that Remy had expected her to either. He remembered what he'd said to her: that he loved her. Did he really mean it? Or did he just crack underneath the pressure of everyone telling him that he did love her… she had told him that she loved him back, but then again, what could she – really, the both of them know about such a serious matter?
Sighing, he sent out his empathy towards her. He had tried earlier with Kurt not knowing out of habit with no success. He hated not being able to feel her. Especially at that moment, when he would've given anything to even sense a flicker of emotion from her. Even if it were negative, he would've taken it. Right now, she was a rock - a cold and non-living stone. She stuck out in his awareness and there was nothing he could do to change it. Every moment he experienced competed with the last as his most helpless one.
Rogue was still walking. Her bare feet didn't make a sound as she lightly trudged into nowhere. The silence was almost deafening and a ringing began to sound in her ear. For the hell of it, she began to hum tunelessly, just to keep the utter silence away.
She also began to realize her surroundings as she walked on. Everything was hazy, like a thick cloud had come in and settled around her. It seemed to follow her everywhere. She peered around, hoping to find something besides gray. Then she saw it. In the distance – to Rogue it looked to be about a mile – there was a splash of color. Bright, vivid light. Smiling, Rogue's pace quickened; she now had a goal.
Remy and Kurt played for almost two hours, varying between different games. They started with Spit, which kept them aware of each other's moves instead of on Rogue. Remy won most of the hands of that, unsurprisingly. Kurt even laughed about it once, and Remy joined in. They genuinely had fun and 'forgot' about Rogue for the time being, though the thought of her lingered in the back of both their minds. When it came to poker, Kurt amazingly won a good deal of the hands.
"Where did y' learn? I t'ought I was de card shark of dis place," Remy smirked.
"I can't tell you all of my secrets now, can I?" Kurt laughed in response.
"Touché." Remy did come back with a couple good hands though. After a couple hands of Rummy 500 (where they both didn't even make it up to two hundred points each), they called it a night.
"We'll have to finish this game tomorrow," Kurt suggested.
Remy nodded, yawning. "Y' stayin' here t'night?" He pointed to the vacant bed on the other side of Rogue.
"I don't think I should… There's something I need to do before I head to my room anyway." Unsure of what Kurt was referring to, Remy just let it go and bid him goodnight. He concluded that Kurt was on the way of getting better, but everyone just needed time. His mother was dead and his sister could have most likely been dead. Considering the situation, Kurt was handling it pretty well.
Kurt smiled halfheartedly and walked over to Rogue. With her hair laced around her face, he cradled her head in his soft blue hand. He whispered goodnight to her and kissed her forehead through a lock of white hair. Hank had told him of the loss of her powers, but Kurt still didn't want to take any chances. There was no telling if they'd come back while she was living inside herself.
Once again, and Remy joked to himself that it was becoming a classic cliché; all he could do was stare at Rogue. It wasn't as if he could have entertained himself with any more cards or watched TV (Hank didn't have one installed in the medical room). She still hadn't moved, as surprising as that revelation was to Remy. And even again, he tried with his empathy with no success. He was beginning to get aggravated.
Slowly, he pushed his legs to the side of the bed. It was hard to do with all the bandaging around his legs and torso. However, he'd taken some of the bandaging off in order to play cards with no problem so at least he had the dexterity of his hands.
"Dammit," he muttered to himself. There was no way he could even bend correctly to begin unwrapping the gauze from his knees. He chuckled to himself. I could pro'bly walk over dere like a robot.
Momentarily deciding he had nothing better to do, he pushed himself up onto his stiff legs. Immediately he was hit with nausea and a wave of dizziness. He grabbed for the bed but it was too late. He'd unknowingly swayed away from it and landed hard on the cold tiled floor. His right side stung with pain and his vision sprinkled with golden stars. "Merde…" he mumbled as his eyelids fell shut.
When his eyes opened next he was again lying on his bed. With a groan due to the extra pain in his side, he lifted his hands to his face to rub away any grogginess. He brought his hands back down along his neck and rolled over on his left side so he could see Rogue. He came face to face with a sheet of white paper. Another groan emitted from his lips as he tilted it to accommodate his reading view. "Stay in bed, Remy! J" Hank, of course. Remy could tell from the perfectly scripted cursive – it was almost feminine, but it definitely had Hank's medical flair. The 'H' at the bottom was unmistakably his.
Remy discreetly pushed the note off the bed with a smirk. If I say I didn' see it den would he be upset if I got up again? Once again, he sat up, this time hurting a bit more due to his bruised-up side. His legs slid over the side of their own accord and soon he'd pushed himself – painfully – to his feet.
"Oww…" he said as if someone was listening – maybe Rogue would hear him. His hands clutched tightly to his bed sheets so he wouldn't fall again. He looked down to his bandaged legs, feeling nausea was over him again. His eyelids fluttered shut and his grip on the bed tightened even more. Slowly, he moved towards the wall, his eyes cracking open just slightly. He loosened his grip only to move it down a bit and tighten it again. Hank wasn't kiddin' 'bout dis vertigo feelin'.
Rogue's bed seemed so far away to him now. In reality, she couldn't have been more than fifteen feet away from his bed, but with his mind swimming about and throwing off his equilibrium, she could've been all the way across a football field. It made no matter to Remy though. He would get to her.
He found the wall and smiled. He would look like such a fool using the wall as a guide and walking with tightly bound legs, but he didn't care. Maybe that was the small blessing in Rogue being unconscious: he wouldn't have to worry about being Mr. Dark and Dashing for now.
You live in the dark, you in the pain, you on the run.
Rogue's pace had turned into a sprint in a matter of moments. She tried teleporting, flying, anything that would get her there quicker, but nothing availed. Although she'd materialized the clothes on her body, that seemed to be the extent of her power now in her mind. She was trapped, but somehow she knew when she finally reached the color, she would be free.
Living a hell, living a ghost, living your end.
It still seemed so far away. She wanted to be able to reach out and touch the color. Before – in her line of view – she could put her pinky finger up and block the color from her sight. Now, it took her two palms to cover it. It was her only way of telling herself that she'd gotten somewhere. She paused to glance behind her back. Gray. Sickly, dark and unenthusiastic gray. It made her want to run even more.
Never seem to get in the place that I belong.
"Almost there… almost there…" Her chanting echoed in her ears and soon she began hearing her feet slam onto the cold ground of her mind.
Don't wanna lose the time, lose the time to come.
Remy trailed along the wall. He kept most of his weight on his hands and arms, slowly but steadily making his way to Rogue. Luckily, the IV Hank had him on was on the correct side of the bed. It followed him, its wheels squeaking in such a taunting tone Remy wanted to knock it over and continue his trek in peace. "Focus on her, Remy," he told himself. She's all dat matters now.
Whatever you say it's all right, whatever you do it's all good.
"Almost dere."
Whatever you say it's all right.
Slam. Slam. Slam. She had stopped chanting to herself and the pounding of her naked feet barely registered in her mind. It was all a hollow echo all around her. The light was so close. Just a few more steps and it would be hers.
Silence is not the way; we need to talk about it.
He was so close to her now. He could see the med lab's florescent lights reflect off Rogue's respiratory tubes. She looked even more pallid up close.
If heaven is on the way…"So pale…" he whispered numbly, his hand finally touching the generic metal headboard. Her skin was just a shade pinker than the bone white strands framing her face. Remy noticed at that moment that the strands had turned into several locks. Through the front part of her scalp threaded more white strands, highlighting a good portion of her hair. If it weren't for her angelic face, she may have looked fifty-some years old.
If heaven is on the way…You in the sea, on a decline, breaking the waves.
Rogue closed her eyes and felt the warmth of the color before her. Every shade of color had a feeling and it was wonderful. The blues and cyans were a chilling breeze along her neck. The greens licked at her feet like blades of grass. Yellows and oranges beat down on her from above. Reds kissed her face like lips. She smiled underneath the tender care of all the sensations. She needed to see it. Her eyes fluttered open slowly and she gasped at the sights in front of her.
Watching the lights go down, letting the cables sleep.
Everything fell into some organized order when her eyes adjusted. Images were everywhere. They weren't flashes like she was used to when she would absorb people; it was more like in every place in front of her there were living, breathing people going about with their daily duties. Rogue's head tilted to the side – she recognized all of them. She could see her teammates, but it didn't seem like any of them could see her.
Whatever you say it's all right, whatever you do it's all good.
Remy weighed the options his head. He could stand and just stare at her. Or, he could attempt sitting down on the bed. It would be hard… if he tried the latter he would just end up draped across her prone body. Just imagining Hank or anyone coming in would be a very embarrassing sight.
Whatever you say it's all right.
His head was pounding with the exhaustion of moving. Maybe he shouldn't have gotten up after all…
Silence is not the way, we need to talk about it.
No. Getting up was the right thing to do. He heard randomly that talking to people in comas usually helps them get out, right? And he certainly couldn't talk to her from across the room. But then again, he didn't know how long he could stand up on his two legs without fainting again.
If heaven is on the way, we'll wrap the world around it.
"Remy?"
He blinked. He heard Rogue's voice but knew it wasn't her. His head looked up to the doorway where Ororo was standing with Sarah. They were blurred – the only distinguishing factor between the two of them was the blotch of white and pink against the metal walls.
"What are you doing out of bed, Remy?" Ororo asked, Sarah rushing over to him. The wind rider wasn't far behind.
Sarah pulled up a chair for him to sit in next to Rogue's bed. "You shouldn't be out of bed! Your head is too damaged to be doing any sort of exertion."
"Pff, says Henri." His gaze drifted over to Rogue. Almost dere, cherie.
If heaven is on the way, if heaven is on the way…Rogue walked towards the people. She saw Sam and Paige talking and eating dinner with their family. Jean was bathing an infantile Nathan in the tub with Scott watching serenely from the doorway. Emma was in her room sprawled out on her bed, doped up on some anti-depressant.
I'm a stranger in this town.
Curiously, Rogue made her way to the Emma image. "Emma? Can ya hear me?" Emma didn't move or acknowledge Rogue's presence in any way. Rogue looked closer and saw how much younger Emma appeared. It was almost as if she were sixteen again, though Rogue had never known the older woman at that age. Tear stains streaked the blonde's face and Rogue realized that it wasn't Emma's room at the institute.
I'm a stranger in this town.
Rogue tore her face away from that image, wondering where she was. Peering about, she found one of Bobby playing in the snow with Jubilee. Bobby had just built up a strong wall of ice and Jubilee was pelting snowballs at it with no avail. They were each about fourteen from Rogue's guess.
I'm a stranger in this townRogue blinked. "Ah've gotta get outta here," she whispered to herself. First the door, now this.
She backed away from Jubilee and Bobby, who didn't notice her retreat at all. Her breath became loud and shallow as her mind reeled with confusion. Everyone passed her in blurs: Jean's scarlet hair, Scott's ruby glasses, Emma's sterile while room, Ororo dusty brown hometown village, Lorna's baby-fine lime green hair, Betsy's painting violet nail polish onto a drunken Warren's hands, Hank's transformation into the blue beast he presently was, Kurt's forever golden eyes.
Blue.
Gold.
If heaven is on the way.
"I am happy to see you're up though, Remy," Ororo smiled. "It was painful to see you so tightly bound up and in bed."
Sarah smirked as well. "Usually I would say something in response to you being completely tied up and helpless…" she trailed off when he didn't react to either of their comments.
His eyes were boring into Rogue. He sensed a flicker. It was all he needed. It was like a small pebble had broken off the boulder named Rogue on his personal astral plane.
There was hope.
If heaven is on the way…Blue and Gold. Soon all the other colors had ceased to be, with the exception of those two and the brilliant orange-red that consumed Raven's hair.
"Momma?"
A maternal smile graced her face. "I'm here, Beth."
"… Why aren't Ah seein' yoah memories like Ah'm seein' everyone else's?"
"Because I'm your memory."
Rogue peered at her as if her mother had just grown three more arms – not that it wasn't impossible for the shapeshifter, but the absurdity of the image was enough to identify the look on Rogue's face. "Ah don't understand. Where am Ah?"
"You're trapped in your head right now. Just taking some down time." Raven extended her hand towards her daughter. "Come walk with me."
Rogue hesitated for a moment, but then placed her hand in her mother's, realizing how much smaller her hand was at the moment. She looked up to her mother and saw that the woman was so much taller than her as well. She glanced down to see that she was closer to the ground than she would have imagined.
I'm a stranger in this town.
They began to walk, and Rogue was having trouble keeping up with her mother's strides. Just like when she was younger…
I'm a stranger in this town.
They walked and Rogue began to see the Mississippi river stretch out in the distance. Their first house rose in front of it and Rogue giggled with glee. She let go of her mother's hand and ran to the river. She made it to the outer banks and turned to wait for Raven, a joyful smile graced upon her face. Raven's face was of pure happiness as well.
Rogue looked down into the water and saw her reflection. For one, her outfit had changed: lemon yellow tank top (and upon a further scrutiny, flower print shorts). Gone were the white streaks framing her face. Gone were the lines of weariness and torment that sometime etched across her features in times of turmoil. Back was the hope in her green eyes. She was five again.
I'm a stranger in this town.
It was probably her happiest memory with her mother. Days before Victor where they would just lay by the banks. Raven sat down on the grass next to the conveniently placed picnic basket. "Eat with me, Bethany."
Rogue nodded with a smile and stepped away from the bank to sit with her mom. Raven started to lie out what was in the basket and Rogue could've died from happiness. Homemade fried chicken! She beamed at her mother, who smiled back in return. Although Raven was just a memory, she was still reacting with Rogue as if it were real time. They were having a moment they should've shared more often before her terrible demise.
"Is Kurt coming home soon?" Rogue randomly asked.
Raven smiled and looked over Rogue's shoulder. Rogue turned around and immediately, her nose was pressed against the blue fur of her brother. "Kurt!" She tackled her brother, who had also been de-aged.
"Hey, Bethie," he smiled.
"How is the Xavier Institute working for you, honey?" Raven asked.
"I love it! People there are so understanding and just accept me for who I am." He reached down to grab a piece of chicken. "You made this, right?"
"Of course she did, Kurt!" Rogue answered. Kurt smiled and took a bite out of the chicken.
"Just how I like it."
Rogue grinned with chicken in her mouth. This was how life should've been. Something was missing though for her and she couldn't place her finger on it…
Remy was so intent on feeling Rogue's emotions that he didn't notice Ororo and Sarah exiting the room. They'd become frustrated in their attempts to talk to him so they quickly said goodbye and left. He didn't even acknowledge them.
The 'pebble' turned out to be confusion and Remy figured that she was just realizing that she was in her mind. Maybe she'd just woken up within herself and it would really only be a matter of time before she knew she had to wake up into the real world.
Soon, more broke off. She was slowly coming aware of everything in her mind, he assumed. But then, suddenly, nothing happened. It was almost a steady flow of pebbles until nothing, like she'd found a stable point. It scared Remy. What if she was settled enough in her mind that she would never wake up?
"Dammit," he muttered. It was the first thing he had muttered since the girls had first come to visit him, and they had sat with him for over thirty minutes in attempt to converse with him.
He pulled away from her for the time being to give his mind a break. Using his empathy at this rate would knock him back out in a short matter of time. He sat back in the chair Sarah had given him the best his could – his body wouldn't bend into a 90-degree angle for the life of him.
An idea came to mind. What if I were t' touch her… Hank said dat her powers weren' workin'… but what if dey came back on? Would I be able to snap her outta it? Then he remembered what he'd heard about comas before – the person shouldn't be woken up at all… they just need to wake up on their own. The thought aggravated Remy. It's not fair, he thought harshly. She needs t' know I'm here. I need t' know dat she's dere! She looks so dead, he thought in a quieter tone.
He reached up to her face, aiming to brush away a strand of white away from her eyes. He imagined her being afraid when she woke up. At least he'd woken up in the three days they'd been in the med-lab. She'd been in darkness for that whole time – from his perspective, anyway.
As he pushed the hair aside, his finger gently brushed against her pale forehead. Remy didn't even feel it because it was such a subtle touch, and Rogue didn't change – physically.
Rogue was sipping homemade strawberry lemonade when she felt… different. With her mom and Kurt, she'd overwhelmed with happiness, but something was inherently missing. However, she was sensing all colors at the picnic: the green of the grass, the clear blue of the river, the orange warmth of the sun, the wonderful gold of her family's eyes. Something still struck her as peculiar though.
Upon feeling strange, she set down her lemonade on the red and white checker blanket. As the purple plastic cup touched the red block of fabric – the color actually moved.
Rogue recoiled from the blanket, jumping up onto her small legs. "What's wrong, Bethany? Is there a bug on the blanket?" Raven asked, concerned.
"The red moved," she squeaked in response, pointing at the alleged square.
"What?"
"It… rippled."
"You're imaging things, honey," Raven smiled.
"But-"
"Beth, c'mon," Kurt laughed. "The red moved? I think your imagination is playing tricks with you." His tail twitched with his snickers.
She snatched his writhing tail from the air. "Ah know what Ah saw," she said menacingly.
"Hey!" He smacked her hand away from the prehensile tail. When his hand connected with hers, a flash of light overcame her vision, and Kurt appeared momentarily fatigued. He shook his head to brush away the slight confusion and continued cradling his tail, but Rogue knew. While Kurt pretended nothing had happened, Rogue knew.
Instinctively, she looked up to her mother for answers. Raven stared back at her blankly as if she was trying to hide something. Frustrated, Rogue turned away from her and looked to the picnic blanket again. She tentatively poked her finger at the red block that had wavered before. Sure enough, it once again rippled as if she was poking at a still lake. This time, however, when her finger pulled away, the color came with her. It sucked onto her finger like a baby nursing – the further away she pulled, the more the color came with her. She looked down at the block and saw that the particular square on the blanket had become unsaturated as she pulled away the color. It was pure black. From her view, with her finger still pulling, it was red on black.
Red.
Black.
She gasped. "Remy."
With that revelation, an intoxicatingly warm shower of red came upon her and the picnic. She watched sadly as her mother and brother was tucked into the comfort of familiar cascading black. Watching her mother leave was hard, but Rogue knew she'd be safe in darkness. Rogue knew the darkness well – and it was unbelievably and ironically comforting.
She sat back down and eventually lay down in the heated shower. Her skin began to tint pink from the red droplets. "Remy?" she called. He was so close. She could feel his empathy beat against her with each raindrop that fell against her skin. Without even realizing it, her clothes unconsciously faded so she could feel the tickle of every droplet against her pale skin. She giggled as they splashed across her face, arms, legs and torso. She was with him at that moment, and she had no idea how.
As she basked herself in the red rain, she noticed that her body had lengthened again – she'd aged ten years to the present time. She lazily picked the lock of hair that she knew had been void of her natural auburn and saw that, oddly, it was still the reddish-brown color. She didn't feel complete.
Her other hand grazed down to the picnic blanket and pinched at a white square. Smiling, she simply picked up the color and smeared it onto the lock of hair.
"Ah love mah mind," she giggled, toying with her hair. Instantly, the white streak began to absorb the still falling rain. Her face turned up toward what was the sky of her mind before black had over taken it. Her smile fell. "But Ah need ta wake up." Silently, she added Goodnight, Momma.
Remy had fallen asleep. The effort he had expended on traveling across the room and using his empathy had taken its toll on him.
He hadn't felt a thing from when he mistakenly touched Rogue. His wounds he did feel, however. Somehow he'd forgotten about the gash on his throat. One track mind, Cajun, he'd laughed to himself when he realized how obvious it was. The thick cotton gauze around his neck had begun to feel restricting and the constant thought of that weakened him as well. Slowly, his last bit of energy left him and he was left with the need to fall asleep and rest.
His arm haphazardly propped his head up. The position wasn't comfortable in the least and he would no doubt wake up sore, but his exhaustion ignored that meager little fact.
He did not sleep long, because he woke up to a tapping on his head. It was light, almost not there, but Remy still prepared himself for a lecture from Hank. He could almost be sure that Ororo or Sarah would have told the blue doctor about what Remy had done. If they had, Remy told himself to not be angry with the two girls. They were only worried about his safety and he was setting himself up for inevitable pain and maybe further damage.
"I'm sorry, Henri," he mumbled, trying to pick up head up. His neck was in considerable pain, so the task was difficult.
A faint giggle flowed to his ears. "Last time Ah checked," a soft voice began. "Ah didn't have blue fur."
Remy blinked. I imagined dat voice. It's pro'bly jus' Sarah again. He tried to turn his head to the source of the voice, but a groan escaped his lips from the pain.
"Ooh, don't hurt yoahself, sugah. Not on account of me."
He had to do a double take no the voice again. "Why not f'r y'?" He responded without thinking.
"Because ya look more banged up than Ah do!"
At this point Remy had managed to crank his head around to Rogue. He didn't know if he was being delusional and Rogue was still comatose or what. He wasn't sure if he wanted her to be awake at that moment either.
When he had faced the voice, the thought of not wanting Rogue to be awake faded.
Green. Blinking, beautiful, glorious green.
"Chere?"
A small smile came to her still very pale face. "Hi, Remy," she said in the same tiny tone.
Remy tried to manage a smile, but his lips were wavering too much from his internal tears of joy. "Y' up!"
Rogue grinned this time. "Ah am."
Eagerly, Remy attempted to shuffle himself around so he could see her better. "Ow."
"Don't do that! Don't hurt yoahself, jus' relax, Remy." She reached out towards him shakily, placing the thin bed sheet between her hand and his. "Shouldn't you be in bed? Hank's gonna throw a fit if you're over here."
Remy shrugged nonchalantly and hid the pain it caused him. "Wouldn' stop me from seein' y'."
Color finally came to her cheeks with his words. The faintest blush of pink reached her cheeks as she smiled. "Ah missed you."
"I did too. Y' wouldn' believe how worried I was. An' Kurt, too," he added at the end.
Rogue's eyes fell downcast at the mention of Kurt. It only reminded her of Raven and how she was gone, despite the wonderful memory of the picnic in her mind. "How is he doin'?"
Remy searched for the gentlest words. "Not too good." Alright, they weren't the best words, but what's wrong with being brutally honest?
"Ah figured… any word on mah Momma? Are they gonna bury her here?"
"I'm not sure, p'tite. It's been t'ree days." Quickly he glanced at the clock. "Maybe four by now. Dey may have already done it."
"Oh." Remy's hand squeezed hers delicately. "Where is he now?"
"Pro'bly upstairs. I c'n imagine he's bein' kinda secluded dese days."
"Yeah… Ah wanna see him."
Remy nodded, understanding completely. "He'll be happy t' know y' up," he said lightheartedly. He began warily looking for a communicator of some sort that Hank had to have had in there.
"Remy, wait."
"What's wrong, Rogue?"
Rogue. Being called that again sent comforting shivers down her spine. In the memory she was constantly called 'Beth'. She realized that moment that the little girl in the flowered shorts was a figment of the past. "Ah wanna tell ya somethin'."
When she paused for a moment, he whispered "go 'head."
"In mah head… it took me awhile ta realize that you weren't there. Ah mean… everyone else was. Ah had everyone's memories… but Ah didn't see yoahs. An' then… you came ta me like a rain." A smirk came to her face. "It was like we were one person." She looked him in the eyes. "An' then Ah remembered what ya said ta me… Back befoh in the buildin'…"
"I meant it, chere."
Her eyes glittered with even more green as if a flood of color rushed into them. "Ah just wanted ta make sure."
"Don't ever doubt it, Rogue." He remembered how when he was alone he had begun to doubt it himself, but seeing her awake and with him talking reminded him how much he needed her in his life. Just to show her, he gently lifted her hand, blanket and all, to his lips and kissed it.
She giggled again. "Ah wish Ah could hug y' right now."
"Yeah…de movin' t'ing jus' ain' possible at dis moment," he chuckled.
"Ah can wait."
"Rogue?" Came a voice from the door.
She turned to see her brother. "Kurt!"
He grinned a fang-filled grin and teleported over to her bedside. Within moments, his arms were wrapped around her tenderly in a warm embrace. "Thank God you're up."
"Ah missed you, too. Ah saw you an' Momma in mah head." Kurt pulled away from her for an explanation and she told him of the memory. By the tears that had come to his eyes, Rogue could tell he had relived the memory in his own mind as she replayed it for him. "Please don't cry, Kurt."
"It's just that… this has been so hard. Watching Mom die… and then sit here waiting for you to either wake up or just stay asleep forever… I thought I was going to lose both of you."
She smiled despite his words. "You would never lose me, Kurt." She mainly said the words to comfort him, but what if she hadn't felt Remy's presence in her mind? Would she have woken up? She was with Kurt technically… but the real world Kurt would be left completely without a family. And the thought of that was heart crumbling. "Ah'm sorry Ah had you so worried."
"Don't be sorry, Rogue," he murmured as he pulled her into a hug again. He was wary of any injuries that she may have had and the wires connected to her in doing so. "I'm just relieved that this bump is finally over. All that's left now is healing."
Rogue blinked back tears. Healing. Momma's still dead… foh some reason Ah'd almost fohgotten. A thought came to mind. "Victor's dead, ain't he? Ah remember someone tellin' me he was, but Ah was too worried about you an' Remy."
Kurt nodded against her hair. "He is. He's never going to hurt you again."
She bit her lip from crying out. "Finally?" she managed to whimper.
She felt Remy's hand enclose around hers again through the blanket. "Oui, chere. He's gone." She squeezed his hand and lay more against Kurt's embrace. A sound emitted from her mouth that was half giggle, half sob. But she said nothing. Kurt and Remy exchanged a quick glance that said that maybe it had finally gotten through to her that she was safe. Maybe the thought scared her. Both boys were thinking of how they had thought she would've been safe at the institute, and then this. Would Rogue ever feel completely safe?
Remy watched Kurt hold his sister, and could tell he never wanted to let go. Dis part of de story is over… but what now? Deir maman is dead… it's not like someone c'n smile an' say 'Hey, it'll be all right, p'tite',' an' Rogue'll be all great again. I know it doesn' work dat way. Hopefully now dat she's up, her and Kurt c'n begin t' heal t'get'er, because dat's what she really needs - what dey both need.
"Remy!"
Uh-oh, Remy thought with a chuckle. "Hey, Henri."
"Didn't you get my note- Rogue! You're up!" Hank bounced over to her bedside.
She smiled up to him with tears in her eyes. "Ah am." Kurt stepped back to allow Hank to examine her vitals. He walked over to the other side and stood next to Remy. Hank briefly asked Kurt to help Remy back to bed.
After the blue elf had done so, Remy allowed him to sit at the foot of the bed. "Y' gon' sleep in y' own room again t'night?" He asked with a smile.
Kurt returned the smile. "I think it's safe to say that Rogue needs two watchers tonight." They both thought back to Rogue and Remy's first day at the institute, when Rogue was unconscious due to the return of her memories.
"Dat was so long ago…" Remy reminisced randomly.
"Yeah. It's hard to imagine that you guys have already been here for four years, but then again, it seems like you've been here as long as I have, too."
Remy shrugged, and thankfully, it wasn't painful. "Dis is de first place dat ever felt like home. In de material sense."
"Not in the family sense?" Kurt asked with a smirk.
"I'd say it was de second."
Kurt nodded, and his eyes drifted back to his sister. Remy's glance followed Kurt's as well. "If you think about it, she's really the only person I've got left. And some days I feel like I barely know her." He looked back to Remy. "That's where I'm envious of you. You two share so much."
"I guess it's a good time t' start new. She's not gonna wan' dwell on dis, an' her trust is gon' need t' be built back up. I still t'ink an' even dough Victor's dead, she's still gon' hold dis fear in her heart forever."
"Sadly, I agree with you on that," Kurt sighed. "Everything just takes time though."
"Oui. It does."
Hank had finished his exam and left the boys with Rogue once again. He had no doubt gone to tell the others the news of her waking in person, so the med lab would be filled with the institute's students in no time.
Rogue was lying down on her side, facing the boys. Her anchors to the world. Smiling, she yawned. "Thanks, ya guys. It was nice ta wake up ta such familiar faces."
"Don't mention it," Kurt responded. "Did Hank tell you to get some real sleep now?"
"Yeah. Mah head's beginning ta hurt but he said that's normal."
Kurt got up from the bed and walked over to her side. He clasped her hand in his own through the blanket and bent down to give her a kiss on the top of her head. "Then sleep, Rogue. We'll make sure no one wakes you up." She nodded slowly, her eyes already fluttering shut. Before they made their final fall, she glanced to Remy and smiled briefly. He mouthed "good night" to her, and she was back in dreamland with her two Lego guardians of Kurt and Remy.
TBC…
Agh, I'm soooooooooooo sorry about the time it took on this… I don't even consider this the best work I could've written… but I really felt like you guys needed something to read, and I can work off of this. I really hope this isn't a whole bunch of nothing… so lemme know what you think! Once again, thank you two everyone who reviewed the last chapter: Coquine, gothic-rogue13, Neurotic Temptress, Randirogue, gaea, Christy S, Samman, ishandahalf, Lyra Silvertongue, Malena, T., ReeMarie, Furry Elf, Rynn, glaivegirl, mentallyINSANE, and Tago. Also to everyone else who's shy about reviewing and who read. Hehe. Also, as always, to Lilith for helping me smooth out the bumps when I asked for advice in the beginning and also for the tidbit about Rogue walking through her mind. You're the best chica!
And now, as always, review! Please? giggles