Share The Insanity

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'I'm too sexy for my hair…that's why it isn't there.'

Pursing his lips, Rishid stared grimly down at the message stitched in black thread on the tan baseball cap – size extra-large – in his hands.

Marik and Malik, who were each looking at the hat over one of his shoulders, goggled.

Marik also giggled. "That's so true, Rishid!"

"It is, Master Marik?" Rishid asked, tone almost too pleasant.

Marik nodded vigorously, not noticing the danger he was in from his foster brother. "Uh-huh! You're really sexy…and it's mostly because you only have that ponytail." He giggled again and batted at the hank of hair like a cat with a mouse.

Quirking one eyebrow, Rishid stared down at Malik. "Is he for real?" the expression seemed to say.

"I'm afraid so," Malik's head-tilt and shrug replied.

"And you don't have a problem with your lover finding me attractive?" Rishid asked, voice low. Marik, attention span always short, had by now lost interest in playing with Rishid's hair and was watching television, but he had ears like a bat.

Hair like one, too, Rishid thought, but was wise enough not to say.

Malik shrugged. "Just another thing we have in common," he dismissed.

"I'm not gay, Master Malik," Rishid said in a deadly voice. "Not to mention that you're my brother. And Marik's…well, Marik."

"I know you're not gay – and that's cool," Malik said reassuringly. "Marik's always been a little weird about family relationships; you know that as well as I do. And I only said I find you attractive – not that I'm attracted to you. That would be just…" He shuddered. "Like if you and Isis got together."

"I think Shadi would kill me if I ever expressed such interest in our sister," Rishid said, good humor restored. He did not want to deal with either of the trouble twins trying to seduce him.

"True," Malik agreed. "Anyway, I respect your right to be straight. So does Marik."

Reassured, Rishid asked, "So what should I do with this…hat?"

"I think you should wear it," Marik piped up. "It might get you more dates. You haven't been laid in years, Rishid."

Hiding a smile behind his hand, Malik took in his brother's grimace and said, "Marik has a point, Rishid."

"Oh?" Rishid's voice was dangerously low, and Malik knew that if he didn't want to have to do his own laundry for the foreseeable future, he should tread carefully.

"Yes," Malik said recklessly. "Women love men with a sense of humor, after all. I think…not that I know all that much about women, but anyway…" He shook his head, getting his thoughts – and by extension, his words – back on track. "And nothing's sexier than a man who can make fun of himself, right?"

A frown coming over his face, Rishid said, "I suppose…"

"Besides, you're always complaining about how your head gets sunburned. This way, you won't have to worry about it," Malik pointed out.

"Fine," Rishid said defeatedly. "I will wear the hat, Master Malik."

"Glad that's over," Marik said. "Now that that's settled…who are we gonna get back for this?"

A calculating look came over Rishid's face. "I know just the person…"

Marik and Malik exchanged wild grins. Cool! Their madness was spreading!