Guess what? I LIVE! Who knew? Certainly not ya'll with my near month since last update. God it feels like so much longer!

LilSmartass: I'm sorry…I don't like being so mean to him. It's just my sick, twisted love…I really do love him. Hmm…mouth bigger than brain…that sounds familiar (eyes dart around hoping no one is looking)

Paggie-rossi-black: Hmm, well, if you want to know a secret: I didn't mean for Regulus to actually throw a single spell. He was supposed to just sit there and mutter suggestions to Snape. But then, while writing, he suddenly had a wand, and it made sense: Narcissa sees that he specifically attacked Sirius and freaks. Btw: yeah, Cissa does rock. I really do love her. With stories especially, you can bend her in just the right ways to make her evil, understanding, trapped, kick ass, or ha-freaking-larious. The last being my favorite way to think of her. You really can make the Malfoys out to be a great family.

U DON'T NO ME: Although about a month late, I think that distress over Sirius's state is a perfectly legitimate excuse. NO! No, he can't really be evil! I love him! Snape makes me smile and I laugh when he comes onto the screen or page or whatever. Well, about Remus, I decided that his tension and anger was built up before the full moon, and then after he's just too tired to do much. Plus Remus is just a good sport.

Katharina-B: I'm glad you like Narcissa. Everyone should like Narcissa. She's so likeable! I need to write a Narcissa story. But umm yeah…about the apples and the trees. You're right. I just was too lazy to go back over this chapter to fix mistakes. My bad.

Elayna Fournier: Hmm link thing? I have absolutely no idea. That must be some site malfunction.

Maraudering-siriusly: oh good! I was scared you though he was being a bad nosy person! I am mucho relieved.

Lewlyn: have no fear, my dear. I deplore Sirius/Remus slash, nothing against anyone who does like it. It just isn't my thing, just like I'm not the biggest fan of R/Hr or H/G. I don't know. They just don't do anything for me. Besides, I like Tonks and Remus together way too much ;)

EverKitsune: haha, np, dear. I had the chapter ready, so why not give it to ya'll. NO, of course he isn't dead. He'll be back. He has to come back or I just don't know what I'll do…

BrennQT: indeed let us mourn momentarily for the cool hovering wheelchair. ignore Sirius's dance of victory. I love that everyone loves Narcissa! That's it. I have officially decided that she gets her own story…someday. Hee…hear her roar…snicker…

And thanks so much to all the rest of ya'll who reviewed and then had to put up with my lack of muselack of update. God, you'd think they'd be a little nicer to me. I read a freaking hymn about them in mythology and I've always liked their songs in Hercules.

Chapter 12

One afternoon, around the end of February, James trudged into the dorm room, soaking wet. He threw his broom to the floor before falling face first into his bed. Sirius was laying on his own one the other side of the door, dark eyes focused lazily in the depths of a book. "You'll just get your sheets wet, you know," he said, not looking at his friend.

James said something that was completely muffled by the comforter. Sirius rolled his eyes. James sighed heavily and turned his head to face Sirius. "It's cold out there."

"Then you should dry off," Sirius said. "Unless you strive to catch hypothermia, that is."

James did his best to focus on Sirius's face, but it was rather difficult, seeing as his glasses were askew on his face. "Maybe I do. But I'm too tired to move. Practice was rough. And my unity is gone."

Sirius rolled his eyes again. "Do stop whining, Prongs. You're captain. You set the practices. And I can't do much about your unity."

James lifted his head and propped himself up on his elbows. "I didn't mean that in a bad way," he said.

Sirius nodded. "I know you didn't." James adjusted his glasses as he sat up. He took his wand from his pocket and with a flick, his clothes were dry and warm. He peeled off his arm and leg pads and fell back into the soft mattress.

"Game's tomorrow," James said after a few minutes. Sirius grunted in response. The room was silent until James blurted, "I can't do it." For the first time since James had entered the room, Sirius turned his eyes to the other dark haired boy. He raised a brow. James sat up and ran his hands through his hair wildly. "The game," he clarified. "I can't play it. Not without you. I've never played a game in my life without you!"

Sirius quickly checked his page number and shut the book. He slowly sat up and turned to face James. "That's a load of rubbish and you know it," he said cooly.

"Like hell it is," James exclaimed, a bit angry that Sirius wasn't sympathetic with him.

"It is," Sirius said. "You're a damn fine Qudditch player, and you can fly like nothing I've ever seen. We didn't even have the same positions. So me not being in the air won't have much to do with you."

"But–"

"Shut it," Sirius said with a glare. James blinked at him. He sighed heavily. "You'll at least be there, won't you?" he asked tentatively.

Sirius laughed. "When do I ever miss Quidditch?"

"Well, there was that one time when you were snogging Alice Hopper in the broom closet," James said. "How many detentions did you get when Filch caught you?"

"Six," Sirius said with a smirk. "He was being quite nasty that day. That was the week when Dumbledore took dungboms off the list of forbidden items after we promised not to use them anymore."

"You'd think that after six years he'd know us better than that," James said in a disapproving manner. Sirius shook his head. "Some people never learn, aye?"

At that moment, the door opened and Remus stepped in, Peter at his heels. "I take it that some people means us," Remus said lightly. James and Sirius laughed. The other two boys sat on their beds, and the Marauders began meaningless conversation, much involving teasing James about Lily.

"She's not going to go out with you, Prongs," Remus was saying. "At least not until you've deflated a bit." Sirius roared with laughter. "Just because she touched your arm willingly doesn't means she wants you."

James's face grew hot. "Just you wait, Moony. She'll come around, and then you'll be eating your words. Besides, it's not like the birds are throwing themselves at you."

Remus just smiled and opened a book. "See," James insisted. "You've back out." Remus's smile only grew.

Sometime later, when Peter's snores had properly filled the air around them, Sirius lay on his bed staring at the wall. His curtains were almost completely drawn, but through a small gap, a stream of golden light penetrated the darkness. Sirius studied the cracks in the stone, not really focusing on any particular thought process.

He had been out of his accursed wheelchair for nearly a week now, thank whatever being above. Sirius relished in the feeling of walking again, although it was with a slight limp. The only drawback Sirius could seem to find with his returned freedom was James's discovery of his motherly side. The unruly haired boy had taken it upon himself to walk very close to Sirius's side and to attempt to support him if it even seemed as though he were likely to falter. Sirius was touched but annoyed.

He was required–according to Healer Carter's orders–to check in with Madame Pomfrey once a week until the third week of March. Sirius felt it was all rather unnecessary, but the Potters and the healer didn't want to take any chances. The over-fussy matron had forbidden Sirius from carrying heavy loads, which James took as meaning Sirius was not to lift a finger. Sirius was nearly convinced that James was either striving to be exactly like his mother or to be Sirius's boyfriend. Both comments had toned down James's protective behavior quite a bit.

As Sirius lay in his bed, he heard the flicking of paper. Remus was on the next page of his book. "James," the werewolf's voice came. "What really happened?" Okay, may be he just marked his place. And he wasn't talking about what Sirius thought he was talking about...was he?

"What do you mean," James's voice had a slightly hard edge to it. It looked like James thought Remus was talking about what Sirius thought he was talking about.

"You know what I'm talking about," Remus said seriously. Yes, Remus was definitely talking about what James had thought he was talking about what Sirius had thought he was talking about...Sirius shook his head. He was confusing himself, and Remus was still talking. "You two can fool Peter, but I'm not an idiot."

"No one ever said you were."

"No," Remus said, his own voice earning a harsh sound, "but you've acted like it."

Ouch, Sirius thought.

After a few seconds of silence, James said, "Look, Moony, we don't think you're a cabbage, far from it. I mean, you're the one who lets us copy his work when we're too lazy to do it ourselves. And it always comes out right."

Sirius could almost feel the heat from the stare he knew Remus was sending James. "I'm not talking about book smarts and you know it." James was likely sending his own glare back. "I don't believe those rumors that were flying about when Sirius came back. They were all first grade trash."

Remus continued, "I know a lie when I hear one, Prongs. You can't make up as many stories as I do and not be able to recognize others at it. I'm practically a human lie detector."

"Moony, I–wait, what's that?"

Remus sighed. "Muggle device, it's like a sort of Truth Serum. We were talking about them in Muggle Studies the other day."

"Oh," James said bringing the more important topic back into conversation, "well, look, what ever happened isn't any of your business, and–"

"And it wasn't yours that I'm a werewolf," Remus snapped. Sirius winced and could hear James's sharp intake of breath. "But you found out. You and Sirius found out my most hidden secret, the one thing I tried more than anything to hide. You found out. And then you helped me. You remained my friends, and you broke the law to help me through it. And I will never be able to find the words to express my gratitude to all of you." Remus's voice was tight with emotion.

"But now when one of you is in need, you won't let me help. You won't even tell me what's wrong. Oh, I've got a pretty damn good idea of what happened to him, but I could be wrong. I pray to God that I'm wrong, but odds are that I'm right."

The two were silent, probably sizing each other up, deciding what to say next. Sirius tried to control the rate of his breathing. If it came in loud, short gasps they would know he was up. He couldn't let them know he was listening in.

He cursed inwardly. Why was Remus so damn observant? Why couldn't he be easy to fool like Peter or the other imbecilic students of this school? This wasn't supposed to be for him to know! It wasn't for anyone to know!

But then again, Remus was right. Sirius knew his secret. Perhaps Sirius was being too hypocritical. Remus was a good friend. Sirius regarded him nearly as high as James. Remus was his brother too. But what would he say about Sirius if he knew the truth? Would he be supportive as the Potters had been, trying to build him back up? Would he try to back away, feeling that he had bit off more than he could chew? Or would he laugh?

No, Sirius tried to tell himself. Not Remus. Remus would never laugh about something like this. He had a secret as horrible as Sirius's. He should understand. But could Sirius tell him...?

After a prolonged silence, James said, "Look, Remus, it's not my place to say anything. That's Sirius's right. If he won't talk, then neither will I."

Remus sighed. "Well, at least he has you through this," he said simply, but Sirius could detect the hurt. "I just hope one day he can trust me as much I trusted him." With that, there was the sound of an object being placed on a table, the rustling of blankets, and the golden light shining through the gap in Sirius's curtains dimmed.

It was several long seconds before the remaining light disappeared leaving Sirius in a world of darkness only slightly lighter than the guilt plaguing his mind.

The next morning when Sirius awoke, James had already left for the Quidditch Pitch. Peter was at breakfast, and Remus was dressing. Sirius quickly pulled on his normal black pants and turtleneck. He slipped into his boots and gathered up his robe and scarf. Remus stood leaning against one of his bed posters waiting.

Sirius sighed and turned to face the werewolf, his brows furrowed oddly. Remus uncrossed his arms and pushed off the poster. "Padfoot," he asked, "are you all right?"

Sirius bit his bottom lip and held out a bar of Honeydukes Chocolate. A greedy gleam came to Remus's eyes, but the werewolf shook his head to clear it and looked at Sirius puzzled. "Just take it, Moony," he said moodily.

Remus blinked at it, but was suddenly struck with the realization that Sirius had heard the entire conversation he had had with James the night before. Sirius Black rarely, if ever, apologized. The only time Remus had ever heard it had been the day after the January full moon, when Sirius had offered the bag of chocolate to make up for his absence. Remus smiled at his friend and plucked the candy from his hand. "Whenever you're ready, Padfoot. Whenever you're ready." The greedy gleam was back in his eye as he munched on the bar while they walked to breakfast.

Sirius followed Remus out the door and then to head down for breakfast. He was still feeling moody, not just from that nagging need to apologize and doing said act, but also from his recent lack of Quidditch. In all reality, he should be down in the locker room with James, forcing him to stop pacing and shutting him up when he got to rambling.

He also could not duel, not officially, anyways. He needed some way to vent these frustrations. Perhaps the others would be up to rearranging the Slytherin Common Room later that night.

The two boys collected Peter and quickly made their way down to the Quidditch Pitch. They were determined to have good seats. Sirius stared at the loose curtain of a lion hanging across the pitch from them. That was the field entrance to the locker rooms. James and the others were all back there, waiting for the game to begin. Waiting without him. Sirius frowned. Once again, he bitterly mused on the great injustice of it all.

It wasn't much longer before the majority of Hogwarts students came pouring down the lawns and into the pitch. The three Marauders were surrounded by fellow Gryffindors, Lily quickly moving to Sirius's side. She gave him a small smile, knowing just how much he would have preferred to be on his broom, knocking the stuffing out of the Bludgers. Madame Hooch walked onto the field and blew her whistle. From the locker rooms, the Quidditch teams came flying out in a burst of colors. Sirius and the others cheered wildly at their Housemates.

From the professors' box, where the magical mike was located, a very unexpected voice called out, "Due to some rather unbecoming display of House rivalry, our student commentator will be spending the next few hours in the Hospital Wing." The mass of students were all staring at McGonagall, who was looking more stern than Sirius had seen her since his last detention. "As the position of Quidditch commentator is specifically reserved for a student, we will be allowing a substitute for this game. Who would like—?"

She was cut off by Sirius's loud voice, which had been quickly enhanced, "Ooh! Ooh, me, sir, me!" He jumped up and down waving his hands madly. Several around him were laughing, as was James from his broom. Almost as if she had been expecting it, she said, "Come over here, then, Mr. Black."

Sirius let out a whoop of celebration. Voice still enhanced, he yelled out, "Oi! Prongs, mate, give me a lift. I've taken on a momentary bout of laziness." James swooped over to the stands, and Sirius hopped onto the broom behind him. After the quick venture, which Sirius very much appreciated (how long had he been off a broom now?), James flew back to his position. Sirius looked over at McGonagall and held out his hand expectantly. Hesitantly and as though it was harming her greatly, the Transfiguration professor dropped the mike into Sirius's open hand.

"I'm going to regret this," she muttered. "I should have just done it myself."

"And, of course, that was Professor McGonagall, our lovely transfiguration professor. I would say she's a lovely old bird, but we all know that that would be silly," Sirius said beaming and ignoring the twitch that was already forming in said professor's left eye. "And onto the game! Down on the pitch we have our absolutely spiffing boys and girls in red! Let's hear it for the Gryffindors!" The pitch erupted with cheers that drowned out any Slytherin hissing. "Gryffindor is lead by, of course, James Potter, me best mate and rightfully the best of us all out here up in the air. See how he doth fly, like a bird in the air, like a fish in the sea, or even like a gorilla through the trees in the Amazon."

"Black, if you will not be seri—professional, I will take that mike away from you."

"Oh, she caught herself there," Sirius laughed. "You'd think that after six years of it, none of you lot would ever begin to say it around or involving me. Alas, do we ever learn? Back to Quidditch! The Gryffindors have a spectacular team this year…and it would have been great were I to still be flying, but am I? Noooo. That would be too easy!" Sirius was silent for a few second, his eyes darting back and forth. A slight cough from Flinktwick brought him back to Present-Time Land. "Anyways, Gryffindor is sure to do simply smashing! So let's get it on."

The entire pitch was silent, and one could practically see the waves of hatred radiating from the Slytherins. Sirius looked around, blinking oddly. He turned to the side to find McGonagall nearly in his face. Sirius held in a slight yelp and asked, "Can I help you?"

The middle aged woman narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips to a purse that was until then unknown to human kind. "Do not be biased, Black."

Sirius sighed in disappointment. "Fine, fine," he said waving her off. He raised his brow as he looked down upon the pitch. Slumping down on the railing, he said, "And the Slytherins."

The Gryffindors all laughed and Madame Hooch, knowing that trying to get Sirius Black to call a fair game was optimistic to the point of foolishness. She stuck her whistle in her mouth and blew shrilly as she tossed the Quaffle into the air. The Chasers dove forward, and the others flew out. "Right on ya, mate!" Sirius cried as James snagged the red ball. "James knicked the Quaffle, and he's headed over to the Slytherin goals. Toss to Abney, then to James again. Parnell's behind you, mate. HA!" Sirius cheered as James flipped to avoid a swipe from the Slytherin captain.

"Black! You cannot warn your housemates of the opposing team's moves!"

Sirius promptly ignored her. "Right, the others have the ball now, and they're doing something. Blah, blah, blah, I really don't care. They're getting up to the posts…Righto! Beautiful save by Miss Marionette Keenan. Wonderful girl, really. Funny, too. Took her to Hogsmeade one weekend. She had butterbeer shooting out my nose all day." Marionette laughed and blew Sirius an exaggerated kiss from the goals.

Not long into the game, the Slytherins, apparently displeased with Sirius's tendency to point out any and all their movements to the Gryffindors, began playing dirty. Being that James was generally disliked among the Slytherin populous, he was targeted the most. In fact, the only reason he wasn't already lying in a hospital bed was due to his superb flying skills, which Sirius pointed out snootily to the rival team.

When Nott, one of the Beaters, send a Bludger flying at Kristin Abney out of play, Sirius shouted over the roar of outrage, "Hey! She's a girl! I happen to know that your mother doesn't approve of such things. I'll write her and have you scrubbing pickled newt jars for a week! You surely remember last time that happened, aye, Nott?" Several Gryffindors laughed at the memory of the Howler Nott had received in fourth year when Sirius had, through no fault of his own, let slip to Mrs. Nott the nasty Densaugeo curse he had shot at a second year girl.

"Black, will you kindly not threaten the opposing players!"

"Oh, come on, Professor, it was a cheat shot and you know it," Sirius countered.

"All the same, you will not show preference for one House over the other, even if it your feelings at heart, even if it is your House, and—"

"Even if they were slimy gits?"

"Even if they were slimy—BLACK!" McGonagall had just gone a rather lovely shade of Gryffindor red.

"You heard it, straight from the Aethonan's mouth," Sirius crowed.

"Why you little—" McGonagall looked as though she would love nothing more than to strangle Sirius with the cord dangling form the mike. She might have tried it too had Dumbledore not popped a lemon drop into her mouth, shocking her out of anger.

"Lemon drops do wonders for the world, wouldn't you agree, Mr. Black," Dumbledore asked.

"That they do, sir," Sirius laughed. "Would you throw us one?" Dumbledore was only happy to oblige. People so rarely took his offered Lemon Drops. For the life of him, he couldn't figure out why. They were so delicious , after all.

Right, sorry that just sort of ended, but ya'll wouldn't believe the workload floating over my head right now. I'm going nuts! For weeks I could only get one or two paragraphs to come out of this. Grrrr…one day my Muses will return full throng to me.

Although she isn't in this chapter, we dedicate it to the coolness that is Narcissa. Rock on, Narcissa, rock on.