Bijoux: Okay, for those of you who read and enjoyed Palace stories then you'll probably like this. I own this without Corad and it will have more than one chapter, which follows on with the story, unlike Palace Stories. We will still be continuing with Palace stories even though we both have seperate fics now.
This is based as if the cast of Jak2 and Jak3 are filming the games, but at the same time. They all live in trailers in some courtyard near the studio and so on. It will be from different members of the casts point of view. I don't own the"Jak and Daxter" sereies.
The Horrors of Game Making…
Chapter 1- A Day of Cats and Alcohol…
"So your telling me…ME?! That we're not aloud to leave this city…?" Jak screamed at an innocent stage hand, spit was catapulted out his mouth and all over the small trailer.
"Look sir, you can leave as soon as we've finished filming the game...okay…?" The stage hand sighed as he turned to leave Jak's trailer. Jak sighed before slumping over to his prized couch, where he collapsed and began to read a women's day magazine.
JAK
Oh…oh I get it…I get this whole thing perfectly fine! I'm not good enough to leave this trash heap of a city…humph…well that's nice! Stupid pigs…
Knocking?! KNOCKING?!!! Knocking on my door…the knocking of the hideous door…the hideous knock…knock of hideous-ness…hideous' knock…
I growl before getting to my feet and heading towards the door. Heh, I bet it's that pansy of an actor Vin…that moron…trust him to be knocking on my door this early in the morning…
I check my watch…it's 3:30 pm…oh well…
I pull open the door and sure enough it's Vin. Vin and that wretched cat…stupid cat…I wish I could grab it and shove it up Vin's scrawny ass…that would be so good…I can hear the roar of the crowd now as everyone sees Vin DIE!
"Oh…oh, ah, ah, hey Jak…I was just you know wondering if you could look after my snookums while I go get some shopping done…?" Vin cowers in my door, like a rodent being chased by my almighty foot…
I groan, "Reergh…can't you go ask Erol…? Or Torn…?" Vin seems to look a little nervous at this. He must know that I despise his cat as much as Praxis despises veges…or as much as Krew despises Jenny Craig…
"Well…I would…but I just don't trust either of them…one time Erol shoved my little lovely in one of Seem's empty beer bottles and rolled it down a hill…and another time, Torn threw her at the ceiling fan because she got the blame for Seem's beer burping…it wasn't a very nice day for her ya know…?" Vin whimpers as he goes back and fourth in front of me…he's tormenting me…he's just asking me to use his carcass as gun practice…he just wants me to pull out my blaster gun…he wants to disappear into the horizon…my darker form after him, going as fast as Praxis travel when it's free-day at McDonalds on free-day…he just wants it…
I groan with annoyance as I roll my eyes and cross my arms.
"Fine Vin…I'll look after your cat for a while…you just go do your groceries and I'll keep her in two pieces, tops. Okay…?" I sigh as he tug the cat's leash out of Vin's shaking hand.
"Okay…um…but could actually try to keep her in one piece…? Please…?" Vin nervously stumbles away. He begins to cower as I glare at him. My glaring must tell him that it's either, the cat coming back in two pieces tops, or I'll chuck a Praxis and sit on it…although this time it would be on purpose…not like the time Praxis sat on Daxter's pet turtle…heh, that was so funny…
I laugh to myself as I head towards Torn's trailer. I knock on the door and wait for the spiteful one to appear.
Soon enough Torn appears. He's glaring at me with those evil little eyes of his…the fiend…
"Whattya want Moron…?" Torn hisses as he crosses his arms.
"Well, I was kinda wondering if you could look after Vin's cat for me…I have to go do a shooting for Jak2…" I sigh as I pull the cat's leash harshly in front of me. The cat stumbles at my feet. Torn rolls his eyes before grabbing the cat's leash.
"Thanks Torn!" I call as I turn away and head towards the studio. I laugh at sound of Torn knocking on Sig's trailer door, probably pulling a me…
"Okay…so which scene are we doing today…?" I call out to the producers and other cast members who are all standing around doing nothing of importance, although the sight of Samos levitating up towards the ceiling fan looks rather welcoming…
"We're redoing the starting shot," a stagehand replies as Daxter strolls past me.
"WHAT?!!" I scream with hatred, "But we already did that shot 4 times!" I scream, now they've made me angry…
"Well, sorry Jak, but Praxis' fly was open the last time we did it…" The stage hand sighs. He thinks I'm being difficult…I'll show him difficult.
"Hey, hey, hey, hey! You can't blame all this on me!" Praxis has started to scream and carry on.
I peer down at Praxis' waist and realize something…
"But you can't even see his fly!!" I scream as I point accusingly at Praxis' amour.
"Hey yeah!" Praxis looks down and realizes that you wouldn't in fact be able to see his fly.
"Yeah well it's a different story when it causes Mr. Praxis' pants to fall down…" Oh great…now that old fart Kor, is having a go at it…I glare at him. Don't make me come over there old fart…
I roll my eyes with hatred. As much as I hate to admit it, Kor is right as the video from last time begins to play on the camera screen, next to me. I sit on a chair in the distance and watch that smaller, pathetic, version of me stroll onto the scene.
The back ground looks like that crap trap Sandover…I roll my eyes before lazing in my chair and glaring into the distance. The scene starts up with that old fart muttering his old fart speech…what a hippy…
"For every age there is a time of trial. The rocks faced such a fire before they were the strength beneath our feet. The plants braved vast winds before their roots could give us life. As a sage of considerable years, I have known only one such great ordeal. Yet the hero it created was a champion of all time…(mutter under breathe) god I need a beer…" Samos did his prologue entry as the opening credits came in. If that old fart says that line one more time in my presence…I'll kill him…
"Today's the big day, Jak. I hope you are prepared…for whatever happens…" Samos sighs as he approaches that scrawny waste of space. I can just see myself throwing that pitiful thing down the toilet then setting Praxis and his chilly wrath on him… it would be so sweet…
I turn my gaze back on the scene. Keira has begun to rant on…I roll my eyes…any minute now someone will stuff this whole thing up and it'll just be repeat of the last 4 times…every five damn minutes…cut…cut…cut…cut…cut…cut…Right up until I can't take it anymore and I disappear down the street in that lawn mower again! I growl towards Praxis who is eating a greasy cheese burger…judging by the amount of fat that's leaking out of it, it must be from McDonalds…
I look back and they're finally up to Daxter now…
"Easy for you to say! We did all the heavy lifting!" Daxter complains as he tilts his head in that scrawny piece of scrawn. Daxter's hand begins to levitate over some round piece of crap that's attached to the front of the Rift Rider thingy…
"Daxter! Don't touch anything! Though the precursors vanished long ago, the artifacts they left behind can still bring great…" Samos has started his ranting but is stopped by Praxis who has rolled the cheeseburger wrapper up into a ball and has chucked it at the old fart.
"CUT!"
Samos gives a blank, sorry for, yet slightly angry expression.
"BOOOO!! (Hisses)!! BOOOOOOOOOOO! YUCK!!! (Makes farting noise at Samos) BOOOO!!" Praxis screams at Samos who immediately heads for the cask of red wine, that is taking its usual place in the nearby bar fridge. Stagehands and security guards are heading for Samos trying to stop him from ruining his sober-ness.
Samos kicks and screams before levitating as fast as he can to the fridge. He thrusts the door open and grabs the wine cask. He then levitates as fast as he can up to the ceiling and sits on a stage light.
This makes me laugh. Samos soon starts to pour the wine into his tubby little guts. He occasionally stops and laughs at the victims below that are trying to get him down. His laugh get's more loud and uneasy as the wine flows through him.
5 minutes later.
The cask had been taken away from the now completely drunk stupid Samos…humph…there goes my fun…I growl and cross my arms as I glare towards the scene.
Samos has begun his speech again.
"For every…(burp)…there is a eye of Kyle…the rocks had to eat Nutrigrain before they were the…the…thing…under the basement…the pants had to brave vast winds (complementary fart occurs from Samos. Samos laughs at this) before they turned into dresses…" Samos stumbles about like the drunk he is.
A producer near me begins to ask another producer what Samos is rabiting about and that they can't find it in the script. It's very amusing…well for me at least…the other actors in the scene are eying Samos as if Christmas had been canceled…it brings a smile to my face…
"As a page for 10 billion beers…I have known only one such great underwear brand…yet the factory they created was burned down…(burps)…" Samos continues to stumble for his words. I laugh out loud at this. There can't be any harm in it…after all Torn and Erol have been at it since the old geezer got the damn camera on him.
"Today's my birthday Big Mac…I hope you are prepared…for whatever may happen…(burps in younger Jak's face)…" Younger Jak wafts air away from his face with his hand.
"CUT!!"
I growl at this…it's gonna be one of those days…
Bijoux: Please review, it'll make me happy and hopefully make me want to write more of this...