Title: Just the way you are.
Author: LupinLovesTonksRated: T due to future situationsDisclaimer: HP & all others are trademarks of JK Rowling. No profit is made from the use of these trademarked entities. No animals were harmed in the typing of this fic. Void where prohibited, see store for complete rules and details. Any similarities to actual events are strictly a coincidence.

Chapter Four
"Just keep your eyes closed for a moment," Kingsley said quietly.

After a long moment Kingsley led her forward. He was lucky she trusted him or she wouldn't have allowed him to lead her blindly into a house. Instead of veering left or right to go to one of the houses she had seen before closing her eyes, they walked straight. He led her up a few steps and she heard him knock at a door.

She heard the door slowly creak open and she was led into the foulest smelling room she had ever been into. It smelled heavily of mold, dust, and staleness. She doubled over coughing and gagging from the stench. At that moment, Tonks was unable to keep her promise to keep her eyes closed.

"Don't worry, we all did that our first time in," a familiar voice said. It was familiar in a way she didn't know. As if she should have known the voice but knew she had never heard it before.

When she recovered from the gagging and coughing, she straightened herself to look into the face of a man she had seen several times in the Ministry, on sneering posters. Sirius Black. He was her mother's nephew, so Tonks knew why she thought she should have known his voice.

"What's he doing here?" she growled.

Kingsley chuckled. "Believe it or not, Tonks, he's here because he's on our side. We'll fill you in the library." Kingsley nodded toward Sirius in a friendly manner. "Sirius, if you could do the honors."

"I'd love to," Sirius piped in a falsely cheerful tone. "Because that's my task within the order… To show people to the library."

Kingsley chuckled again and walked onward toward a door at the end of the corridor.

"Come with me please," Sirius said with an exhausted sigh. "I promise I won't hurt you. Remus would kill me if I did."

Tonks felt her heart leap into her throat. She followed Sirius into the library, which looked like it had recently been cleaned except for a few minor things. She took a seat on one of the chairs in the room and gazed at Sirius, as if demanding answers. Once upon a time, her mother had said Sirius was a good lad, never did any harm to anyone. But the last Tonks had heard Sirius was a vicious murderer that had betrayed the Potters.

"I already know what you want to ask," Sirius said, grinning widely. He wanted over and roughed her hair, making her yelp slightly when he tugged on a few of the strands. "Sorry, you had something on there… Remus will be along after he gives his status report and tells the Order all about you."

"That's not what I was wanting to ask," Tonks informed flatly.

"Ah, so I should have trusted my gut instinct and told you that I did not murder Peter Pettigrew and that he is actually very much still alive. I think the details over Dumbledore's 'ravings' are on file at the Ministry so pretty much everything they say in there is what I would tell you." Sirius plopped down on a sofa. "So, all that aside, when Remus gets here I'll let the two of you have some alone time."

Tonks laughed slightly. "I don't really think that'll be necessary. Unless, of course he wants to be in the same room alone with me."

Sirius gave a throaty chuckle. "I am living at his place until I can get this run down place to vaguely function as a home. Trust me, I think I know what I'm talking about when I say that he would definitely like to get you alone." He gave a slight wink. "But don't let him know I told you that."

Tonks felt her cheeks warm and Sirius barked with laughter. She stood and walked around the library while Sirius mixed up some drinks. Her brow furrowed when she saw one titled The Complete Family History of the House of Black. With tentative fingers she reached up to pluck the book off the shelf, but a noise from the door made her jump and tuck her hands into her pockets.

Remus had entered the room. Sirius just smiled brightly brought Tonks one of his mixed drinks then took another to Remus.

"Enjoy you two," Sirius grinned, then exited the library.

888

Remus looked down at the glass Sirius had put in his hand. Out of precaution, or perhaps just plain paranoia, Remus sniffled the contents. In an instant, Remus looked up as Tonks was about to take a sip from hers. "Don't drink that! Smell it first. Sirius put a love potion in mine."

Tonks held out her glass and blinked several times, but took a sniff of her own. She closed her eyes and gave a contented sigh. "It's been along time since I smelt one of those. Smells like a crisp spring morning, coffee, and--" she frowned slightly. "--Wet dog fur? Weird."

Remus inhaled the ever-changing scent of the love potion in his drink. Each scent was new and made him think of youthful days of spontaneity mixed with a very faint flowery scent he remembered his wolf picking up on from Tonks. If he hadn't known what the drink would have done, he would have drank it in an instant just because of the relaxing nature the combination of the scents made him feel.

He set the glass down on the first table he passed, as he walked deeper into the room. Even without the ever-present voice of the wolf in his mind, Remus felt his heart drop when his eyes met Tonks'. Today she looked somewhat normal with short, spiked, bubblegum pink hair. She was wearing some rather threadbare jeans, laceless shoes, and a maroon Weird Sisters tank top.

Without the echo of the wolf, Remus could honestly tell himself that, had he been a little younger, Tonks would have definitely appealed to his male senses. Not that she didn't of course he was, after all, a man capable of breathing. She was a very appealing girl.

Remus took a seat on the sofa and sighed heavily. "So we meet again," he said simply.

Tonks stopped smelling her drink and set it down abruptly. She walked over to join him on the sofa, slightly tripping over the thick rug between them. Remus couldn't help but vaguely smile at the fact she was so uncoordinated. It was one of her rather endearing traits because she would always flush a light shade of pale pink afterwards. When she sat down next to him, she looked down at her hands and fidgeted with her fingers for a moment.

"Remus, about the other day," she said quietly. "I would just like to apologize if you found what I did offensive. I know a girl like me is not something a guy like you would really like to be seen snogging on in public."

In truth, Remus had not felt the least bit offended. After he had gotten over the initial shock, sometime after his conversation with Sirius had ended, Remus had reflected and thought it had been one of the nicest things to happen to him a long time. But he wasn't about to give her that kind of power over him, so he kept quiet and let her continue.

"I mean, yeah… bright green hair, dressed like a little punk kid," Tonks rambled. "And you looked all handsome and refined. It had to have offended you to be seen by others. The truth is that I am not every--"

"That's enough," Remus said quietly. Instantly, Tonks fell silent. "I didn't care about that Nymphadora--" she visibly cringed "--All I do care about is that you are honest with yourself about who and what you are. Don't pretend to be something you're not for the sake of myself or any others."

Tonks looked at him, an expression between out right surprise and slight confusion was on her face. Then a smile broke across her face that lit up her entire face. It was a look as if Remus had just said the right combination of words to earn him a permanent place as a close friend.

To clarify, Remus continued, "For example. This is not the first time I've seen you with the short pink hair."

Tonks grinned and ran her fingers over her short hair. "It's actually my favorite," she admitted.

"Personally, I think it looks lovely on you because it somehow fits you," Remus said. He was being as honest as he could be, hopefully without encouraging her too much. But the look on her face said that he was definitely doing so anyway.

"Thank you," Tonks said quietly. "You have no idea how much it means to hear someone say something like that." She looked at the drink in her hand as she moved to take a drink then put it on the floor with a frown. "Why would he put a love potion in our drinks?"

Remus chuckled. "Because he's Sirius, that's why. He did something similar when we were at Hogwarts, when I got a fancy for a girl and she had the same sort of fancy for me. He said he was 'encouraging' us." Remus had said the words before he had realized what he was planning to say.

Tonks looked at him, with a slightly surprised expression look on her face. It was there only for a fleeting moment and then it was gone again. At least Remus had to admit, he was impressed at how Tonks was trying not to show her reaction to things he was saying that most women might have jumped upon in hopes of trapping him.

His eyes fell to her lips. He suddenly found himself transfixed by them. In spite of being very capable to have uninfluenced thinking, Remus couldn't help but think about how they had felt on his own lips two weeks earlier. He felt the same heaviness in his chest as he had felt while she had kissed him.

In all honesty, it hadn't really been that impressive of a kiss. Remus had had better first kisses, but he couldn't remember ever feeling such soft and warm lips before. Part of him, which Remus knew was in no way influenced by the wolf, wanted nothing more to try again and see if a second kiss would be better. A more rational side of Remus wanted to hesitate.

Remus sighed heavily. Even outside of the influence of the wolf, he was still very much taken with the young woman. Especially when he thought about how lovely she had looked when he had first seen her on the underground. But, even more so, when he thought about how wickedly playful she was.

He looked over at Tonks. She immediately looked down at her lap, face flushed with embarrassment. There was suddenly no desire to hesitate. He placed a finger under her chin and turned her face toward his. The fact he was still experiencing such emotions without the prodding of the wolf was very illogical to Remus.

Tonks' eyes widened for a moment when he moved in, but then her eyes closed expectantly when his lips were barely touching hers. A slow ragged sigh escaped between her lips when Remus let his hover for a long torturous moment. He felt her moisten her lips with her tongue; her breathing was beginning to intensify with each moment he kept his lips barely touching hers. Finally a small, faint whimper seemed to work its way from her throat.

It was that moment Remus chose to capture her lips then proceeded to ravish them with his mouth. There was no hesitation from her. Her fingers had instantly tangled themselves in his hair, her body had instantly pressed as close as it could get to his. There was a certain type of warmth, a certain fire in Tonks' lips that he had almost experienced before. He had almost experienced it but it had never been quiet like the way he felt it with Tonks. He remembered, once upon a time, wishing he could feel something like it, almost reaching it with a few women in his past and being sorely disappointed that he had never felt it.

Now was the moment he felt the feeling he had always been searching for. It was something wild and free, without any inhibitions tacked onto them. She knew he was a wizard, she knew he was a werewolf.

The kiss felt like a sweet release for his spirit. But, at the same time, he thought it was wrong. He should not have felt it with her. He should have felt nothing when her lips had touched his so he could have gone on with his life, knowing that he could not have ever felt anything other than a friendly affection for her. But, no, he felt free and whole. With just a kiss he could feel an eternity forming in the back of his mind.

And it may have taken shape if Sirius hadn't come in.

"Hey Remus Dumbledore is wanting to know if… Ah! My eyes!"

Remus leapt away from Tonks. Or perhaps, more appropriately, he went across the room. He also wondered how it was humanly possible to pin a woman to a sofa without realizing he was moving or realizing that her legs had practically wrapped themselves around his waist.

Remus picked a book up off the desk and leafed through the pages. After clearing his throat a few times, he finally managed, "Dumbledore was wanting to know if…?"

"I think I sort of got my answer," Sirius chuckled. "But I'll humor you. He wanted to know if you could see yourself doing one of the stakeouts with Tonks. But I don't think you would mind it too much really."

Remus glanced over at Tonks. She was still wide-eyed and trying to right herself in her seat. "I think perhaps you should ask her if she would mind. She has a mission at the Ministry that may well tire her out quickly if done at the same time as Order nights."

Tonks shook her head to clear it and smiled widely. "What?" She shook her head again. "I mean, it shouldn't be a problem. I can sleep while Richard is at work. Another Auror keeps tabs on him there." She looked between Remus and Sirius. "So they're letting me in?"

Sirius nodded. "You can leave at anytime you wish. When it's time for the next meeting, Dumbledore will somehow let you know where this place is."

Tonks nodded excited and stood up, weaving slightly once she did so. She softly laughed and shook her head to clear it one last time. "I think I do need to get going, really. I have to wake up early to start keeping the morning tabs on Richard." Her eyes flickered to Remus. "Good night."

Her face flushed slightly as she made her way past Sirius. Once they heard the entrance door open and shut, Sirius smirked widely.

"We didn't drink it Sirius," Remus said pointedly, knowing exactly what his friend was thinking. He must have been correct because Sirius pursed his lips in a manner that would have rivaled Molly.

"So you two just let it go to waste?" Sirius sighed. "Wonderful. I spent good money on that potion and it went to waste…"

"It's not like you don't have several bottles hidden away somewhere just waiting to just slip into drinks. You forget Sirius, I know you very well. And I know how obsessive you can be when it comes to your evil, diabolical plans."

Sirius simply narrowed his eyes dangerously. "You have yet to see me obsessed."

"Sirius," Remus sighed heavily. He put the book he was holding down on the desk and approached his friend. He placed his hands on Sirius' shoulders. "I appreciate the gesture. I really do. But I have no desire to pursue a relationship, especially not with someone half my age. Just please, stay out of my love life… for once in your life."

Sirius gazed at him steadily for a long moment. "You know, Remus… You may be able to block me out of your head, but I know when you're lying."

888

She had been on cloud nine most of the way to her flat. Of course, most of the time had been spent actually trying to find her flat from Grimmauld Place. But she hadn't seemed to care in the least that it took her more than two hours to find a place that was only two streets away. It had even started to drizzle a misty ran and all she had done was imitate the actors from Singing in the Rain.

If her mother had seen her, she would have asked if Tonks had gotten a hold of some sort of drug at a party. No, Tonks would have replied. Then she would have spilled about a kiss that was much more potent than any drug. She may be wrong, but as far as she was concerned, she was definitely going to be having some rather nice and graphic dreams later that night.

Tonks did a twirl and gave a deep curtsey to her door before slipping the key in. She sang off key to her belongings, while she made herself a sandwich for dinner. She was happy for a rather obvious reason, but not for the reason most would have thought.

She was happy because of a kiss from one Remus Lupin. Her was still fluttering from the thought of it. Once upon a time, her mother had told her that one day she would experience an impassioned, all consuming, make-your-toes-curl, type of kiss. Of course, before that kiss two hours earlier, Tonks had never felt that way. And more than just her toes had curled up.

Tonks fell onto her sofa with a satisfied sigh, leaving her sandwich in the kitchen, forgotten for the time being. She had never really been able to see herself ever getting into a long and lasting relationship until two hours ago. Even when she had met Remus and formed her fondness for him, she hadn't ever phantom the idea that she would have been willing to "settle down" with him. Now, such a thing didn't seem such an odd type of thing to do.

She could definitely get used to the idea of waking up next to Remus everyday. Not someone like him, Remus in specific. She could also see herself doing something she swore she would never do… having children.

Tonks' eyes widened and she gave a small squeak. "Slow down brain," she said. "Too much to take on at the moment. Commitment to one person is enough for right now, wait a few months before you start playing with the idea of a house full of ankle bitters."

She could help but laugh in spite of herself. How could one kiss change so much?

Tonks jumps when a knock sounded at her door. She pulled out her wand and slowly approached the door. When she looked out of the peephole, her blood froze. Richard was standing on the other side. She opened the door only a crack, but kept herself well behind it.

"Hang on Richard," she squeaked. "I was in the middle of cleaning. Let me put something up right quickly and I'll be back to let you in." Without waiting for an answer, Tonks shut the door and turned the security lock.

She raced to the bathroom and looked at her reflection. She concentrated on getting it back to the style she usually wore when in the company of Richard. Her hair took on a few black streaks within the bubblegum pink. Panicking, she tried again.

Nothing changed.

"Oh God," Tonks gulped. She closed her eyes and tried to stop panicking, if she panicked, she always had problems getting her hair to do whatever she wanted. After a few slow, deep breaths she concentrated. When she opened her eyes, she smiled at her reflection. "Perfect."

She raced to unlock the door and let Richard in. He greeted her with a kiss. She couldn't help but notice Richard's lips were cold, and somewhat hard, compared to the warmth and softness of Remus'. Richard looked around her humble little flat and wrinkled his nose.

"I thought you said you were cleaning?" he asked with distaste.

"I had just started when you got here," Tonks said, plastering on a fake smile. "Besides, you know me and cleaning."

"Where have you been all night?" Richard demanded coldly. "I had made plans for us tonight, remember? Unfortunately it's entirely too late to make good on those plans."

Tonks sighed heavily. "And what did I tell you when you popped them on me yesterday? I told you had plans with some friends and that I wasn't going to blow them off when we had been planning our outing for two weeks."

Richard looked furious. It was the first time Tonks had ever seen his eyes darken in that particular manner. However, after a moment, Richard made his expression more pleasant even though his eyes remained dark and clouded. To show there was no hard feeling, Richard pulled Tonks close and kissed her deeply.

For a moment, Tonks returned it, comparing it to the over-whelming feeling she had received from Remus' kiss. She pulled away roughly and wiped away a tear that had formed in her eyes. She choked back everything she wanted to call Richard and say to him, she simply managed, "Just go home. I don't need this right now."

She could have sworn Richard sneered. If he had, it had disappeared as quickly as it had come. As soon as she shut the door, she morphed her hair back to short, spiked, and pink.

Remus was by far a gentleman in all aspects in her book. He was everything she had wished Richard could have been… well, if Richard hadn't been a homicidal wizard killer that is. It was somewhat of a shame that an attractive, poor, older, werewolf was such a gentleman and that the handsome, wealthy, older muggle man was nothing more than just a cheap imitation of everything the first one stood for.