Kute-Anime-Kitty: happy dances make me happy thinks lovingly of BASEketball. Damn that's a good movie! haha, yes I understand how thinking can be a difficult process. It certainly hurts my head.

EsScaper: haha, I think James needed a good slap there. He's being mean! I'm so glad that it was a vivid description. I always think that my passages like that sound too corny or clichéd or some crap like that. So you've made me happy :) …see?

BrennQT: Yeah, I know that James's reactions are very clichéd. But honestly, I think that's the way he would have reacted, based on my interpretation of his personality. He and Sirius are the more impulsive and temperamental of the group, as seen in Snape's memory. Remus is much more calm and understanding. I really don't give a rat's toochy about Peter. Heh heh. But yeah, I couldn't think of another realistic way that would have acted. Oh well. Yeah, Sirius crying is hard to imagine, but for me it's cause I like to think of him as aristocratic. I dunno…maybe my mind just sees that as hotter…heehee

Katharina-B: Ooh, let me know when you have that story done so I can read it. Honestly, I think the "prank" is one of the hardest things to write about—HP fiction-wise. There are no reasons given for why Sirius did it, and we don't know what everyone's opinions and reactions were, excluding Snape. Ooh, I must keep my lips sealed about Remus knowing or not.

Also, I'm glad everyone seemed pleased with Lily's actions and didn't think them too shippy. My best friend is a guy and I certainly have dealt with situations—not exactly like this, but with similar emotions involved—around him. I've had to be there for him while he's been torn apart, and for some reason a long time ago, I just saw Lily being that other sex friend for Sirius. I mean, when they say Sirius was best friends with the Potters, Lily's 50 of that. They probably are closer than they should be in this story, but I just can't bear to have Sirius go through all this with no one. James is furious with him, and Peter and Remus are staying out of it. He needs someone.

Anyways, ya'll have to be sick of my rambling by now. Onward! Oh, and there is a bot of naughty language on James's part toward the end. Just so you know.

Chapter 18

The Gryffindor cliques of Hogwarts were changing.

For over two weeks, James continued to ignore Sirius's presence when they were in the same room. It was a heartbreaking spectacle to watch. It was almost physically necessary to hold Professor McGonagall back from speaking strong words to James. Remus had taken to staying almost solely in Peter's company. Although he had forgiven Sirius's actions, he was still infuriated with him on one level, and Sirius's moping mood was not something Remus felt like dealing with. But James's behavior was becoming unbearable. He had lashed out on Remus and Peter more times than they were willing to put up with.

Lily, who remained furious with James's behavior, was branching her anger out to Remus and Peter as well. They had seemingly abandoned Sirius too, and she was none too happy about it.

Lily and Alice were usually seen in each other's company almost as much as Sirius and James, but with the recent fight between the boys, Lily had broken away from Alice to spend as much time as she could with Sirius. Of course, she had discussed the whole situation with Alice, and Alice, being as kind hearted as she was, understood everything. She didn't feel abandoned; plus, it gave her more time to be around her boyfriend Frank Longbottom, who was a year older. It disrupted the seventh year Gryffindor boys' sense of normalcy a bit, but they had practically adopted Alice, so they were fine

Sirius had finished most of his detentions, and they had been brutal. Longer than most, they cut into the time he should have been spending on his overload of homework. The teachers took next year's N.E.W.T.'s very seriously, and the amount of homework the sixth years were expected to balance was proof. Between the homework, detentions, and lack of usual friends, Sirius was exhausted. It wasn't that Lily wasn't a wonderful girl, but she was no James. Lily didn't approve of sneaking out of the dorms at night to charm the suits of armor to sing pop Muggle songs or convince the House Elves to serve the Slytherin table bad food. He could talk with Lily and laugh, but she was always ready to get back to her school work.

Sirius had tried a few times to get James to talk to him, but the Potter heir stubbornly refused to even look at Sirius. Sirius felt like he was dying a new death each time James stalked away from him, his face etched with fury. James spent as little time in the Gryffindor Tower as he could due to the possibility that Sirius was in there. He also stayed away from the library at all costs. The library was Lily's usual hang out, and with her sudden attachment to Sirius's hip, the former Black heir was sure to be there if not in the Tower.

It was a thorn in James's side that Lily would side with Sirius. Sure, that was how things normally worked, but wasn't it obvious that it was Sirius who was in the wrong? Although he knew Lily hadn't been told anything, couldn't she see that Sirius had done something unforgivable? Every time James saw them walking around the castle together, it made James want to run over and rip Sirius's head off. As if betraying Remus wasn't enough, now he had to steal Lily away!

James kicked a chair as he thought about it. Maybe his initial impression of Sirius had been the correct one. Maybe once a Black always a Black. Once a Slytherin always a Slytherin. Once a Dark wizard always…

James shook his head. No. Even if Sirius had done something unthinkable like tell Snape about the Willow, he was no Dark wizard. Sirius's apparent hate of the Dark Arts was no lie. The pain and fear that his parents had instilled him over the years could was no pretense. No one was that good an actor.

Even if James was furious with Sirius, he couldn't ever honestly say that Sirius would do something like that with purely Dark motives in mind. It was a sobering thought. James could almost feel the fire in his chest dwindle a bit.

James wanted to break something. He was mad at Sirius, damn it! He didn't want any thoughts swimming through his head that would cool off that anger. Sirius deserved the treatment James was giving him, and it wasn't fair that Evans and Remus thought otherwise. Of course, Remus wasn't exactly hanging around Sirius, but it was the same basic principle.

James plopped down in one of the desks of the abandoned classroom his was in which he was sulking. Moodily, he rested his chin on one of his hands. Sirius had never offered any sort of excuse as to why he had betrayed them. And it drove James crazy. During the last argument James had had with Remus, the werewolf had said that Sirius hadn't told him why he told Snape. James could have ripped his hair out. Sirius wasn't trying for forgiveness. He wasn't looking for redemption. He just sat there and took everything that was dished out to him. If he had told them why he had done it, it was possible that James could have looked into that reason and found forgiveness, but Sirius wasn't trying.

James stomped his foot in a childish manner. He was mad, but he wanted his best friend back. Even if Remus and Peter had been around him, they were nothing on Sirius. Sirius was more a brother to him than any of the others. Perhaps that was why James was so crushed at the betrayal.

Of course, the insult to injury was Evans.

Lily Evans just had to side herself with Sirius. She just had to. Sure, she and Sirius were on much friendlier terms than James had ever been with her, but it was James—not Sirius—who had been striving for her attentions for the past few years. It was James who was attracted to her. It was James who was sure he was in love with her.

But despite all this, despite all the times James had cursed some Slytherin for calling her a mudblood, she was siding with the betrayer, the raised Slytherin. James didn't get it. He had always defended Evans. Sure, he hadn't liked her in any way, shape, or form until his third year, but he had never stood for anyone insulting her blood. But Sirius hadn't. When Sirius had first been sorted into Gryffindor, no one had wanted to be around him. He was a Black, should have been a Slytherin. He acted just like them, and he was miserable among those of Godric's pick. Lily had been the only one to try to befriend him. He had called her a mudblood for months. But Lily never gave up on him. James had tried to talk her out of it and had in fact jinxed Sirius a few times for the offensive word.

Even back then Lily had always sided with Sirius.

The injustice of it all was maddening. James felt that he could hex both her and Sirius right now and not feel an ounce of guilt afterwards. It would be a nice way to vent out his frustrations, but McGonagall was angry enough at him from the last time he hexed someone two days ago.

James muttered a curse as the bell rang. He hoisted his bag over his shoulder and walked out of the room and down to Potions. He stormed down to the dungeons, and several people jumped out of his way. They all knew better than to cross James, especially lately.

Throwing open the door, James stalked inside and threw his bag onto the ground beside his chair. He slumped down into his seat. Behind him, he could practically feel the burning glare of Lily Evans. He could picture the disappointed stare Remus was giving him. He thoroughly ignored the sneers from the Slytherins and the stares from the other Houses.

But most definitely, he ignored the way Sirius cringed beside him. James wouldn't have been sitting by Sirius anymore if it hadn't been for Slughorn not allowing them to change the seating arrangement from the beginning of the year. James's grade had been slipping a little bit in the past two weeks due to his lack of speaking to Sirius. Sirius had always been better than he was at potions.

Slughorn shook his head at James's new behavior, just as he did every class and began the lesson. They were soon set to work. They were due to make antidotes to the poisons Slughorn was providing. Most of the students were currently rolling their eyes as the fat professor fawned over Lily once again. She had just made a comment about how a beazor would suffice in place of an actual potion. He loved it when she did things like that.

James peered into his boiling cauldron. It shouldn't actually be boiling, should it? He checked his copy of Advanced Potions and quickly moved to lower the flames. He chopped his mandrake roots and threw them into the cauldron.

Looking at the book, he saw that he needed four grams of chopped gurdyroots. He grabbed one from the supplies cabinet and got to chopping. He reached for the scales just as Sirius did.

James turned to him with blazing eyes, and Sirius hastily drew his hand back. "Go ahead," he muttered quietly.

"Damn right," James snarled.

Sirius looked over at him with pleading eyes. "Prongs, please," he tried.

"What did I tell you about calling me that," James snapped.

Sirius drew in a breath. Had this been a normal circumstance, Sirius would have exploded. He normally had a fierce temper, but he had never been able to throw it at James. Even if he could, there was no way he could afford to right now. James was angry enough at him. "James," he whispered, "please, can't we just talk about this?"

"We have no reason to talk," James hissed under his breath.

"Yes, we do," Sirius said. "We've been best friends for years. How can we just drop that?"

"Well, you certainly did," James said. "You told Snape. That's betrayal. That's betrayal of the worst kind."

"I didn't mean to—"

"Well, you did," James snapped. "You did and it was unforgivable." He threw his gurdyroots into his cauldron with more force than was necessary, causing a decent portion of the liquid to splash over the side.

"I know what I did was wrong," Sirius said desperately. "I know that. I just was really upset, and he was talking about my family and—"

"Oh, your family," James sneered, a little more loudly than Sirius would have preferred. "Your family. The one you can't stand. You certainly turned out quite like them, didn't you?"

Sirius's eyes widened in shock. How could James ever think such a thing? "James, you know I hate them. I mean, what they did…you know. Your family—"

"Helped," James yelled. Sirius jumped in his seat. "We helped you! And look what you did." All eyes in the classroom were on them. Remus hissed in a warning tone, but James ignored him.

"And I never should have done it!" he screamed. "I should have slammed the door in your face!" As soon as the words came out, James clamped his hands over his mouth. He stared in horror at Sirius. He hadn't meant to say that. The entire room was silent. James couldn't even hear the bubbling of the cauldrons.

Sirius stared James, his dark eyes wide and his jaw hanging loose. Eyes were windows to the soul, and Sirius Black kept his shutters closed, even around James. But right then, James could see everything. The pain and sorrow in Sirius's eyes made James want to stick his head in his boiling potion. Sirius's breathing had become short and rapid, and his normally perfect posture was forgotten. His eyes were fogging over. James tried to move, to do something as Sirius's bottom lip began to quiver.

Before anyone could do anything, Sirius stood and bolted from the room. James jumped up from his stool, but he couldn't seem to follow after the other boy. Slughorn didn't have a chance to react before Lily Evans screamed. "POTTER!"

James was frozen, staring at the door. He couldn't turn to look at Lily. She jumped up from her seat, Remus on her heels. She stormed around the tables and in front of James. "You idiot," she screamed shrilly, her blazing eyes filling with tears. Her small hands lashed forward, and she pushed James into a table. His thigh hit the corner, and he buckled. "You idiot," Lily screamed again, grabbing hold of his shirt and shaking him madly. "How could you do something like that?"

Over her head, James could see Remus staring down at him with blazing yellow eyes. Normally, Remus would have stopped such behavior from Lily, but he looked like he would have much rather joined her by kicking James. James would have let him.

Slughorn finally came up and attempted to pull the shrieking girl away from the stunned James. It took Remus to finally get her off as she had begun thrashing so much. Remus kept a hand firmly placed on Lily's shoulder to keep her away from James; she was screaming death threats at that point.

James didn't really register the questions Slughorn was asking him. He didn't notice the hand waving in front of his face as he stared vacantly at the door Sirius had disappeared through. Whispers and stares were directed at him, but James paid them no mind. All he could think of was Sirius's face. He could only think of the utter hurt and pain. He could only see the sorrow. What had he been thinking?

It was a few more minutes before James finally found the strength and will to move. He tore out of the room, ignoring the shouts after him. He had to get out of that dungeon. He had to find Sirius.

James raced through the halls of Hogwarts. They were only occupied by a few sixth and seventh years on their break periods. James nearly plowed into five of them as he ran to the Gryffindor Tower. Sirius wouldn't be there, of course.

But the Marauders' map was tucked away safely under James's mattress.

James flew up the winding stairs to his room. He threw the mattress off the bed and grabbed hold of the map. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good," he said desperately. He bit his bottom lip and hopped lightly on his toes, waiting for the lines of ink to connect to form Hogwarts. As usual, there were hundreds of dots among the lines. James passed over the heavily occupied classrooms and dorms. He scanned abandoned halls. He hoped Sirius wasn't in the Room of Requirement. He wouldn't be able to see him on the map, and there was always the possibility that Sirius had locked it.

James frowned. Where was he? He wasn't in any of the teachers' offices. He wasn't in any of the tunnels. He wasn't near the edge of the forest. He wasn't…Oh, there he was.

James almost brightened before noticing that Sirius was in the prefects' bathroom. He cursed loudly. James wouldn't be able to get in there. He didn't have the password. Lily had surely given it to Sirius. And after what he had done in the dungeons, James knew there was no way he could persuade Remus to give the password to him.

James dropped to the floor, the map fluttering down on his bare bed. He threw off his glasses and buried his face in his hands. James couldn't remember the last time he had cried, but he certainly felt like doing it right then. He wanted to let out all the tears he'd been keeping pent up since Christmas. All the tears he hadn't shed since seeing what Sirius's parents had done, all the tears for what they were still trying to do, all the tears at the betrayal…all the tears for the loss of his brother.

James was almost done composing himself when the door opened, and Remus stepped inside. James, more ashamed than he had ever felt in his life, could not bring his eyes up to meet Remus's, but he knew they were flashing in that dangerous way that was normally reserved for the days leading up to the full moon. Heavy silence hung in the air. It was like a huge weight balanced on James's shoulders. He didn't have the strength to move it.

"Well," Remus asked quietly.

James winced. Remus was furious, more so than when he had been told that Sirius had let Snape in on the secret. Remus had yelled and cursed then. James didn't know how to react to the way Remus was acting now. His mother, McGonagall, Lily…anyone who ever had reason to be angry with him always yelled until they were red in the face. James had become practically immune to it before Hogwarts as his mother yelled at him nearly every day. He could easily worm and charm his way out of the trouble that the yelling-sort dished out. But the calm fury, like what Remus was displaying, was a whole other Quidditch game.

James hung his head lower. He tried to make out the texture of the floor, but it was hopeless without his glasses. "I have nothing to say," James muttered.

"Damn it, James," Remus hissed. "Don't you see what you're doing?"

James swallowed. "You don't get it, Remus," he started.

"I don't get it," Remus asked, cutting off the rest of James's words. "I don't get it? James, are you insane? How in God's name can you still be acting like this?" Remus had balled his fists and would have dearly loved to introduce them to James's face at that moment. Instead, he growled, "You've become the unforgivable one. What you did, James—I still can't believe what I heard down there. Sirius—yes, he did something wrong, but he's sorry and to suggest that he's evil, that he's like his family—James, that's mad. Sirius has been working his ass off for over six years to erase the reputation of his family name from his person. You know it; I know it; the school knows it."

He continued softly, "I have never seen such an expression of pain on someone's face before. I have never seen a person so hurt. You did that, James. You did that to the person everyone in this school thought was unbreakable. No one has ever seen Sirius break down. No one's ever seen through his strongest mask. You broke that mask and probably his heart. No one has the right to do that to another person."

It was silent for a few seconds before James finally muttered, "I know. I'm an asshole."

"Damn straight you're an ass—wait, what?" Remus blinked down at him in surprise. "Come—come again?"

"I'm an asshole," James said miserably. "A complete and utter asshole. I'm a dick, a prat, a bloody, worthless fuck." He grabbed at his dark hair. "I deserve to have the shit beaten out of me. I—I didn't mean what I said, Remus, honest! I would never mean that. Sirius—I was just so determined to stay mad at him. You know how I am with a grudge."

Remus nodded, memories of several encounters between James and Snape flashing through his mind.

"I—I really don't know what made me say that," James stammered. "God, if I hadn't fucked it all up before!"

Remus lowered himself to the floor. He rested his arms on his knees. Honestly, he hadn't expected to come in here and find James remorseful. H had expected the same explosive behavior James had been expressing for the past two weeks. He reached forward and placed a comforting hand on the other's shoulder. "James, I know you would never want to hurt Sirius. I know you were just mad. But you do have to see that you were wrong here. Yes, Sirius might have been wrong before, but that was two weeks ago, and he is sorry. Even if he hadn't ever said it, it's written in his every breath. We forgave him. It's your turn now."

Oh dear, it's going to take a bit longer for the make-up!

Note: I was too lazy to look up if I had made James do any crying. If I did make him, oops, my bad. If I didn't, then you never read this message.