Disclaimer: I don't own any bleach. Not even a tiny bit of it. I do own the cds thou…
A/N:Before you guys read this, I just want to let you know that the timeline of this fic is after Aizen died being pinned to the wall, so it's before all that commotion of who killed who….
Hinamori Momo doesn't like freezing rains. She doesn't like the way each droplets crash to the soil and shatter to pieces. She doesn't like the chill, the aloofness. She doesn't like the way the heavy rain takes away all the sun and clouds from her sight, making it seem as if the downpour would never end, showering the earth with all it's got.
But most of all, she doesn't like it because it reminds her of Aizen. It reminds her of how they used to have a cup of warm tea back then in the 5th division building. It reminds her of how her taichou would hold her small , frail hands in his to keep it from freezing .It reminds her of the touch of warmth in his smile that he would willingly present to her .A smile that puts everything freezing to shame. A smile that defeats any kind of cold. An affectionate smile that out powers her hatred for the rain itself.
But tonight Hinamori Momo is sitting outside in the rain. Letting everything collapse into her. Taking in all the rain. Surrendering to the icy shower of endless emptiness.
Just to feel how it used to be so warm with Aizen.
Just to remember how he used to drape his protective cloak around her.
Just to remember his comforting smile.
For now he is no longer here with her. For now he is simply gone.
The sense of loss is overwhelming. Enveloping her in her own world of darkness, where no one could pull her out from.
As if she had lost her sense of touch, Hinamori continued sitting there. Ignoring how numb her fingers felt from the cold, ignoring how wet herself is at the moment. Her hazel eyes drifted off to a distant place. But her gaze was empty. An emptiness that conceals all the agony within.
Her tears have long since dried. Drops of rain ran down her cheeks, acting as if they were the replacement for those forgotten tears. And so, she just sat there, in the rain, hugging her knees together .With all the resentment, frustration, and torture in her heart.
Hinamori sat there for hours and hours , until she felt that the raindrops doesn't fall into her anymore .She looked up , surprised to find that hyourinmaru's ice-white eyes were gazing pitifully into her empty hazel ones .Reflectively , Hinamori turned around to face the newcomer.
Hitsugaya had used his bankai to shield her from the rain.
"Baka bed wetter Momo! Do you wanna get yourself sick?"
Hitsugaya moved closer to Hinamori, stopping near hyourinmaru.
Hinamori ignored him.
"Everyone was worried"
He said. I was worried.
Hinamori didn't reply .She merely tightened her arms around her legs.
Hitsugaya walked away from Hinamori, and stood in front of her, not facing the vulnerable girl.
"It's Aizen, isn't it?"
Hinamori tilted her face up, only to meet the younger boy's back.
"Shiro-chan ……. He's………..He's….I……."
Hitsugaya wanted to rush into her now , he wanted to embrace her in his arms , he wanted to soothe her pain , her loss , her misery . He wanted to end it all.
But he can't . He knew Hinamori too well to know that she had treasured Aizen , above all people. Even above his prescence . He knew her too well to know that she was blind to his need for her , blind to his need to be so much more than just a friend in her eyes .
He had always stayed in the dark. Stayed at the back of the picture. With nothing else to do except to watch his Hinamori walking with that man , laughing with that man ,and following that man. He chose to put Hinamori's happiness before his own . As long as she's happy , he'll cope.
Hitsugaya used to build a wall of a cold steel around his heart , sealing everyone before they can fully enter . But then Hinamori- the naïve , cheerful Hinamori , who was his exact opposite - had to come along and break his defence , shattering the unpenetrable walls around his heart. She had unmasked him , domesticated him from his customary conducts. It was a painful process , yes. But Hitsugaya realized , that by the time he comprehended that Hinamori had become the sole reason for him to live , it was apparently too late. Another person had occupied her heart.
Hitsugaya didn't remember when he started protecting her .All he remembered , was the warm feeling swirling around his heart whenever she passed by , the slowly - blossoming sugary-smile she always had for him , and her sweet auburn eyes – that says how much she cared for him. All he remembered , was if She's alive , then he'll survive .She was all that he needed.
Hinamori was like the sun to him.
His source of illumination , his spring of hope.
In his eyes , she Shone in an eternally diverse colors.
She was the one to melt his icy manner.
The one to remind him that he's merely a child ,
The one to strike a chord on his mind , and reminds him not to push himself too much .
And now , seeing her being torn apart between the loss of her taichou , and her struggle to keep on living , Hitsugaya found himself unable to do anything.
Unexpectedly, Hitsugaya felt cold – slim arms found their way to his waist , followed by the weight of Hinamori's entire body against his back .
' Shiro – chan….. gomen ne……Can we stay like this…. For a few minutes ?"
Hitsugaya's emerald eyes widened.
Hinamori's arms tautened around his waist , and Hitsugaya could feel her tears soaking into his haori , her cheeks buried deep on his shoulders.
Gradually, HItsugaya wrapped his hands around Hinamori's glacial ones .He could feel Hinamori's slight surprise when he touched her delicate fingers and enveloped them all in his warmth , under his protection.
Hitsugaya finally can't tolerate his will to have her , to hold her in his arms anymore and turned around to face the shivering female. Wiping her tears aside from her stunning face , Hitsugaya pulled her arms into his , and encircled them around himself , and also doing the same thing with his arms. And that's how Hinamori was pulled into Hitsugaya's hug.
Hinamori was trembling even more now , trying to fight back the tears she wanted to cry out for so much . The tears for the feel of other people's body draped so close against her. The tears for her longing to feel the warmth of shelter and protection.
Hitsugaya slowly shifted his right hand to Hinamori's head, Stroking it gently , and slowly signifying for her to lean on him. As he constricted his embrace , Hitsugaya whispered faintly ,lovingly .
"It's okay to cry . I'm here ………I'm here . "
Hitsugaya waited outside the sick ward as Unohana taichou herself alleviated Hinamori. He was tired , from all his division works , from all of Hinamori's problems. But he had to stay there . He had to protect her . He had to dwell by her side .
"Hitsugaya-kun?"
Unohana taichou said softly as she exited the ward.
" How is she?"
" She's okay . A little rest and she will be just fine , "
"Can I come in now?"
"Sure. But be careful , she's sleeping ."
Hitsugaya nodded.
"Thanks Unohana "
He said as he grasped the handle of the door to HInamori's ward.
"You're welcome , Hitsugaya-kun"
Before entering the room, Hitsugaya called Unohana taichou again.
" Unohana! Can I stay here for the night?"
Unohana only smiled .
"Of course you could , Hitsugaya-kun"
And with that , Hitsugaya pushed the doors open and approached the curtains covering Hinamori's bed.
Hinamori was sleeping . Peacefully sleeping. Hitsugaya didn't get to see this kind of Hinamori much often anymore these days. His mind brought him back to blissful memories in their childhood together , where they would get so tired after playing games together , and they would rest their exhausted bodies on their verandah , staring up at the dark grey sky , waiting silently with each other for stars to appear and light the way .Hinamori would commonly fall asleep during this moment , too tired of the game . And he would stare at her for hours and hours just to laugh at the way she sleeps , and just to gaze into her soft features as her dreamworld brought her into places that he couldn't attain.
Hinamori was lying on pure-white sheets. A color as untainted as her soul. Her right hand was on the side of her body , meanwhile her left hand was draped casually over her waist. Her chest was rising up and down , and her soft black hair was loose.
Hitsugaya stood next to the bed , on Hinamori's side. He touched Hinamori's cheeks lovingly and continued to watch the sleeping death god. Hinamori didn't change . She still had that sweet – I'm – so – innocent – and – naïve look on her face when she sleeps. The same look Hitsugaya remembered , the same look Hitsugaya saw , the same look Hitsugaya liked .
Hitsugaya pulled up a chair , and sat next to Hinamori . He flipped his hands together on the bed and rested his chins on them . Hitsugaya felt his eyelids getting heavier and heavier every single passing minutes , nut he chose to keep them wide open , je chose not to warch her , and stay by her side.
Outsidr of the glass window of the ward , Unohana taichou smiled as she witnessed the loving moment.
"Hitsugaya –kun , that's enough . You can sleep you know , Hinamori-chan isn't going anywhere…."
The female 4t division leader whispered against the glass casement.
And slowly ,as if Hitsugaya heard what Unohana Taichou said , his bright – turquoise orbs started to close.
But before he dozes off to a peaceful slumber , Hitsugaya felt a warm hand , Hinamori's hand, moving slightly against him before unconsciously gripping his own .
Hitsugaya smiled .
He holds her subtle hand back . And as he finally drifts to sleep , HItsugaya realized , that Hinamori has always been his.
A/n : So , how was it? Yeah , I know , the title suck….Anyway…Reviews please! I just realized after I finished writing this thing that Hitsugaya was actually kind of OOC…..bangs head on the wall