What was once an interesting, exciting project had become an endless source of heartache. Blake considered switching topics every time she tried to work on her capstone, wanting nothing more than to escape the constant psychological torment, but she'd already put so much work into it. Not only that, but Dean Caldwell already gave his full approval and her pending job at The Peace Center hinged on producing a great report.
She had to move forward, even if every reference to a center of influence brought back memories of Yang and their time together. Even if writing about the sun and its power only reminded her that she'd lost her personal sun, and that she spent most of the day missing its presence.
Not long ago, spending her free time working on projects or studying was nothing out of the ordinary; her life had revolved around her room, the library, and classes. But that was her life before Yang, and now she knew what she was missing.
She didn't like Yang because Yang was popular. She liked Yang because of who she was. She brightened Blake's day with a smile. She warmed Blake's heart with nothing but her presence. And she made Blake smile with her shy jokes or one of those delightful laughs.
For a little while, Blake had convinced herself that she wasn't like everyone else in Yang's life, who wanted something or had something to gain from their relationship. Now, she understood that she was greedier than the rest of them. What she'd wanted from Yang was...everything. She'd been willing to give all of herself in return, but...one of them was much more valuable than the other.
Her regret hadn't faded, but she hoped to eventually come to terms with what she did. The thought hardly crossed her mind before her gaze flitted to her stubbornly silent phone, and a fresh wave of sadness made her put her head in her hands. But she waited out the emotion before shaking her head and getting back to work.
It had only been a few days. Once a few weeks had passed, she should feel differently. Probably not better, but...differently.
No sooner had she refocused on her computer did someone knock on her bedroom door. "Come in," she said while leaning back in her chair and rubbing her eyes. Sun poked his head inside a second later, then looked around the room before cautiously stepping forward.
"What is it?" she asked, immediately noticing his hesitant demeanor.
"So...promise you won't be mad..."
There was no faster way to raise suspicion than by starting a conversation like that.
"What did you do?"
"I'll tell you, but first you have to promise you won't yell at me." When Blake stared him down and didn't respond, he waved his hands. "Fine, I'll tell you. But, uh, please don't be mad."
"Sun."
"Ok, basically, I really don't like when you're sad, so I kind of...went to see Yang."
"You...what?" Blake asked, her voice hardly above a whisper as the blood drained from her cheeks.
"It took forever," Sun rambled on. "I didn't know where she lived so I had to ask about a hundred people, who sent me in different directions -"
"What did she say?" Blake interrupted, incredulous but now desperate to know more. "Sun, what did she say?"
Finally looking at her, he sighed.
"She wasn't there."
The whiplash of emotions left Blake unsure of how she felt. Relieved? Disappointed?
"But I talked to her sister."
Suddenly, Blake understood Sun's hesitancy. He wouldn't have admitted what he did if he learned nothing.
"And?"
If he knew something, which he clearly did, she had to know what it was. His downcast posture suggested that she wouldn't like it, but...she would take any new information about Yang that she could get.
"Sun," she said after he stared at his hands for too long. He met her gaze then, and she worried about the saddened expression in them, but she still had to know. "What did she say?"
"She said...she said that Yang's leaving," he finally said while his shoulders slumped. "She's signing some huge modeling contract, then flying all over the world for shoots and stuff."
Something strong and ugly grabbed Blake's heart at the news, which hurt more than she would have expected.
Yang decided to go through with it. Even though it wasn't what she wanted, even though it would make her miserable, even though it went against everything she claimed to be. Even though she said that she didn't want to, she decided to sign anyway.
"Good for her," Blake mumbled while returning her gaze to her computer. Thankfully, Sun understood the request for solitude and said nothing while backing out the door and closing it behind him. Only after he was gone did she put her head in her hands and wish the news away. Just when she thought this couldn't get any worse...
But it wasn't her decision - it never was. It was Yang's life, and Yang had to live it. Even though she said she didn't want to go down that path, she was allowed to change her mind. She was allowed to do whatever she wanted, and it wasn't Blake's business. Not anymore, at least.
Blake had been asked to offer her opinion, but that was before she ruined one of the best things that had ever happened to her. How did the conversation go without her? How did Yang reach this decision when both Ruby and Weiss didn't want her to go?
Closing her laptop, Blake leaned back in her chair and sighed. There was no point in trying to work when Yang was the only thing on her mind. And it was useless to dwell on Yang when there was nothing she could do.
Yang decided to leave school. So what? They would never see each other again anyway. At least, not outside the painful glimpses around campus that Blake didn't necessarily want anyway. Yang could go live her life of fame and excess, surrounded by people who wanted to use her for their personal gain. Blake could finish school and start work like she'd always planned. Maybe she wouldn't be able to apologize for quite some time now - years, possibly - but...
But why was Yang doing this? What caused the abrupt change of heart? What prompted the sudden about-face?
Blake didn't want to think about it - one of the potential explanations hurt too much - so she focused on the noises Sun made in the kitchen. He sang, or tried to sing, some pop song while opening cupboards and pulling out drawers, adding life to what would otherwise be a lifeless apartment. Now, more than ever, she appreciated his company. He could be annoying and loud, but at least she wasn't alone.
This solitary life, with Sun's presence injecting some fits of excitement, used to be enough for her. Eventually, she would get used to it again, and...it would be enough.
As that depressing thought lingered in her mind, Sun knocked on her door again. "Yeah?" she called out, and he opened the door a second later.
"I made you a sandwich," he said while offering her a plate with a homemade tuna fish sandwich on it. Food was the last thing on her mind, but she accepted the thoughtful gesture with a smile.
"Thank you. I'll eat it later."
The look in his eyes said he wanted her to eat something, especially after she'd declined the last few meals, but he didn't push the subject. "I had an idea," he said instead. "And I think you'll hate it, but hear me out, ok?"
"Ok…"
"I know a lot of people, right? A lot of guys, and a lot of girls - some of them aren't my biggest fans, but I still know them, in a way..."
"Sun."
When he looked at her, she motioned for him to spit it out.
"I'm just saying that like, I can try to find someone you like?" When Blake sat back in her chair, he rushed forward. "I mean, you never know, right? Some of them are really nice!"
She understood what he was doing and why, but the thought of seeing anyone else was indescribably painful. Besides, no matter how nice they were, they wouldn't be Yang. And right now...she only wanted Yang.
"Thanks, Sun," she replied with a tepid smile. "I appreciate it, but...I don't want to be with anyone. Not right now, at least."
"Ok." After nodding once, he regained a smile. "But if you ever feel like it, you know who to call."
"Right. Thank you."
Her smile felt half-powered, at best, but he gave her another concerned look before leaving her room. He was worried about her, but she would be fine. At least, eventually she would be fine. After the slight deviation to let Yang into her life, she was right back where she'd always been, on the path she'd always planned for herself.
Yang, meanwhile, just made a life-changing decision that made Blake so, so...sad. She didn't want Yang to leave her dream of normalcy behind. She didn't want Yang to leave Ruby and Weiss, the two people she trusted more than anyone else. And she didn't want Yang to spend the next however-many years surrounded by beautiful faces and masked personalities.
Would it change her? Would she become jaded? Resentful? Or would she become like them? Forced to adapt to a harsh, thankless life.
Blake grabbed her phone at the thought, but she paused before making another fruitless call. Yang didn't want her opinion anymore - that much was clear - but this was obviously a huge mistake…
And it wasn't Yang's mistake. It was Blake's.
No sooner had the thought crossed her mind did she shoot to her feet and scramble for her keys and wallet. Once she had those, she grabbed a jacket and a pair of shoes before flying out the door. "Sun," she called out while hastily slipping on her shoes. "You said she's out? Does that mean she's signing today? Like right now?"
"Uh...yeah, her sister said 'today,' but wait -"
Blake didn't hear the rest of what he had to say because she was already in the hallway rushing towards the stairwell.
This wasn't Yang changing her mind. This wasn't Yang suddenly deciding she wanted that life. This was the result of Blake's mistake. This was Yang showing how much it hurt her too, and how she'd rather leave school than live with the reminders of what happened. If that was true, Blake had to stop it.
Once outside, she raced towards Yang's apartment at a fast walk bordering on a jog. Realistically, Yang wouldn't want to talk to her, and that was fine. But if she had any chance of making this right, she had to take it now. Waiting for the pain to subside did no good if Yang left in the meantime.
After impatiently waiting at an intersection, Blake hurried across as soon as the light changed. Nerves cropped up when she entered Yang's neighborhood, but she didn't let that slow her down. She wouldn't slow down. Right now, nothing in the world would convince her out of trying to make Yang stay.
This wasn't about her. This wasn't about her wanting Yang to stay so that they could see each other - Yang was avoiding her, anyway. This was about Yang's happiness. And if no one else would stand up and tell Yang to do what she wanted to do, then Blake would be that person. If Yang still decided to leave, at least Blake tried her best.
Reaching Yang's building, she took a deep breath and hurried inside. Then she hurried up the stairs, down the hall, and quickly found herself in front of Yang's door. Her mind chose that moment to remind her of the time she and Yang stood right here, locked in each other's embrace, enjoying each other's company, but she shook off the memory and knocked.
Sun said Yang wasn't home, but Blake needed to find out where she was, meaning she needed help from Weiss or Ruby. While footsteps approached the door, she took another deep breath and prayed it was Ruby.
It wasn't.
"Seriously?" Weiss said as soon as she opened the door, a scowl tilting her lips. "I'm surprised you had the nerve to come back here."
Knowing there was much more at stake here, Blake brushed off the hostile greeting.
"Weiss, I need to talk to Yang -"
"Oh, now you want to talk to her?" Folding her arms across her chest, Weiss scoffed and shook her head. "You're too late. She's already gone."
The words ran like ice through Blake's veins, sending her alarm and desperation even higher. "Then it's true? She's leaving?"
"Like you care."
"Of course I care!"
Blake heard the hurt in her voice, but she swept the emotion away and focused on what was more important - Yang. Because this wasn't just a breakup where the two of them avoided each other until one of them moved on. This was Yang making a life-changing decision she could potentially regret, all because of Blake.
"Where is she? I need to talk to her."
"Like I'm telling you."
"Weiss -" Pausing for a second, Blake took a deep breath and tried to keep her panic in check. She needed to talk to Yang now, and this wasn't helping. "Please," she tried again. "You can hate me all you want, but I need to talk to her."
"Weiss? Who is it?"
At the sound of Ruby's voice, Weiss glanced into the apartment, sighed, and pushed the door all the way open. The moment Ruby saw Blake, her expression fell.
"Oh."
"Ruby," Blake quickly said, hoping Ruby would be easier to reason with than Weiss. "I need to talk to Yang. Please, please tell me where she is."
When Ruby shared a long look with Weiss, Blake could tell they were silently debating what to do. From Weiss' posture, her answer was a firm 'no.' "I...don't think she wants to talk to you..." Ruby answered more diplomatically, and Blake nodded.
"I know she doesn't. I know that. But I need to talk to her before she makes a decision she'll regret." Panic bubbled up in her chest, but she swallowed it back down. "Please…" she pleaded. "You know she doesn't want to do this. She doesn't want to leave school. We can't let her - I can't let her. Please let me try to convince her to stay."
When Ruby and Weiss looked at each other again, tears stung Blake's eyes.
"If either of you can tell me this is what she really wants, then I'll leave. But from everything I learned about her, she doesn't want this. She doesn't want that life. We can't just let her leave."
A reluctant sun. To many, that would sound unfathomable. Who didn't want fame, fortune, and popularity? Who didn't want people catering to every whim, falling over themselves to become a friend?
Yang didn't. And Blake couldn't bear to see someone so endlessly bright, funny, and kind-hearted go further along a path that made her unhappy.
"She's at her agent's office downtown," Ruby finally said while Weiss nodded once beside her. "It's the giant glass one across from the museum. You need to hurry though - she left a while ago."
They looked reluctant to have given the information, but it was everything Blake needed, and she wouldn't let them down. "Thank you," she whispered before racing out of the building.
As soon as she made it outside, she hurried to the closest street and hailed the first cab she saw. After jumping into the backseat, she told the driver, "The Museum of Art," before finding herself on her way. For the first time in what felt like ages, she felt relief. Hope. Along with overwhelming panic and fear.
Hopefully, she wasn't too late. She couldn't be too late. If she was...she'd tear up the contract with her bare hands if she had to. She couldn't let Yang leave.
The cab had hardly slowed when she paid the driver for the ride. "Here you go," he barely got out before she closed the door and raced across the street to the modeling agency towering above her. The building was massive, and her concern rose when she rushed into a cavernous lobby.
Marble floors, multiple chandeliers, and several different seating areas filled out the space. Yang's smiling image graced an oversized poster on the left side of the room, just another reminder that this world was ready to welcome her with open arms.
How could she find Yang in such a big place? Searching every floor would take the rest of the day, and she probably had only minutes, at most. One of the receptionists could help - several sat behind a large desk at the far end of the lobby. They probably wouldn't give out Yang's information to a stranger though, so Blake would just have to be convincing.
Her feet carried her across the lobby while a story formed in her mind - an emergency of some kind. A family emergency. She had to see Yang right away because of a family emergency that required immediate attention.
With a story set, she approached the reception desk with panic and concern she truly felt. Before she even gained their attention, however, a glimpse of golden hair caught her eye. As soon as she turned towards it, her heart fluttered.
Just past the reception desk was a glass-walled conference room that offered little in terms of privacy. Yang sat in that room alongside several men and women wearing professional attire - all of them looking business-like and happy. Yang, meanwhile, listened to what they said with a polite smile and nodded every so often while they presented whatever it was they had to present.
Knowing that the receptionist would stop her from barging in, Blake decided to skip the receptionist entirely. Veering to the right, she picked up her pace and walked purposefully towards the conference room door.
"Excuse me!" one of the receptionists called after her. "You can't go back there!"
Blake picked up the pace rather than heed the order. Hopefully, security took a few minutes to get here. Hopefully, that was enough time to make her case.
Without breaking stride, she opened the conference room door and walked inside. The man in the midst of speaking immediately stopped, and the rest of the room turned towards her in confusion. Well, most of the room looked at her in confusion - Yang's eyes widened.
"Excuse me," she said while rushing to Yang's side. "I need to borrow Yang for a minute," she added before grabbing Yang by the arm and pulling her to her feet.
"Blake, what the hell -"
Blake didn't give Yang time to argue. Instead, she dragged Yang from the room and only let go when they were in the hall. Everyone was staring at them now, but she ignored them just like she ignored the receptionist speaking urgently into the phone.
They'd only been apart for a matter of days, but seeing Yang now...that time felt like an eternity.
"What are you doing?" Yang demanded in a low voice, looking around the lobby before leveling Blake with a stern gaze. "I don't want to talk to you."
"I know you don't," Blake replied, also keeping her voice soft so as not to be overheard by the attention they currently had. "You don't have to say anything, but I need to talk to you."
When Yang scoffed, Blake worried that she might walk away. That she would turn around and walk back into the conference room without listening to a word. But she didn't. Instead, she crossed her arms and shrugged.
"Then talk."
Blake didn't let the discouraging demeanor rattle her. This was too important to feel hurt by the harshness she'd earned.
"Why are you doing this?" she whispered instead. She knew the answer the moment Yang's shoulders slumped and her lilac gaze fell to the floor.
"Why do you think? The money's great. It will set up me and my family for the rest of our lives -"
"Yang..." Blake wanted to reach out and console Yang but kept her hands to herself. "Your family wants you to be happy," she added as her emotions sprang up yet again. "Do you really think Ruby values money over your happiness?"
Yang's silence suggested she didn't have an answer. At least, she didn't have one that supported her argument for leaving. Because it wasn't about money. She was leaving because of something else. Someone else.
"If this is because of me -"
"It's not because of you." Yang finally met Blake's gaze, but the hurt in her eyes only confirmed the lie. "I just...don't want to be at school anymore."
"Please don't give up on your dream," Blake begged, her chest tightening with emotion. "If this is really what you want, then ok. But please don't give up. You don't have to do this - you know you don't. You have a choice, and you can choose to be happy. Please choose to be happy."
Choking up with the words, Blake fell silent and sniffled to hold her tears at bay. She wished, more than anything, that she could make this easier. Because it shouldn't be so hard. Choosing happiness shouldn't be so hard. But it was. Yang's eyes showed exactly how hard it was, and that hurt more than anything.
It was at that moment, while Yang struggled to find a response, that Blake realized what she would willingly give up for Yang's happiness.
Everything.
"You wanted to know what I thought...before." Blake gestured with one hand, symbolizing a past that no longer existed, while holding Yang's gaze. "And I don't want you to do this. Not just because I can't imagine you not being around anymore, but because I've seen how miserable this makes you and it - it hurts to think about you spending your life this way. I don't want that for you. I'll never want that for you. And if that means I have to leave instead, then I will. I'll leave so you can stay."
It was the right thing to do, and she wouldn't regret it, but Yang stared at her for a long time before speaking.
"Why would you do that?"
"Because...this is my fault, and you shouldn't be the one to pay for it. I can't let such a stupid decision change your life like this. I'd rather leave than spend forever knowing you gave up your dream because of me. Because I just...I just want you to be happy, Yang."
With Yang standing in front of her, Blake knew she wanted to do this. She didn't care if she was giving up her future - she would figure something out. She could finish her degree at another school or pursue other options. This wasn't the end of the world for her. This was just...the end of a dream, but it was a small price to pay for Yang's happiness.
"But your job -"
"Is just a job," Blake interrupted with a shake of her head. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed the security guard walking over, but he kept a respectful distance upon seeing her speaking with Yang. With his presence, Yang could stop the conversation whenever she wanted. All she had to do was look his way, and he would remove Blake from her life once and for all. When Yang didn't immediately do that, Blake knew she had to say more.
"I'm sorry I lied to you," she said, knowing she could never apologize for that enough. "I'm sorry that I misled you and took advantage of your willingness to trust me. I'm sorry that I hurt you, but...you know what? I don't regret making it up."
Disbelief flickered through Yang's eyes, but Blake shook her head.
"I don't. I regret not telling you myself, and I regret how you had to find out the truth. But I don't regret making it up. Because that stupid lie is how we met, and you're one of the most amazing people I've ever known. Not because you're pretty, or popular, or the 'next top model' or whatever they call you. Because you're sweet and thoughtful and funny, and you care about your friends and family so much, and you say the most adorable things when you're nervous, and…"
Realizing she could go on like that for a while, Blake sighed and ended with a simple, "And I loved every minute we spent together."
"Did you really? Or was it all just pretend?"
"You think I was pretending?" Thinking about the moments they shared, Blake shook her head and dryly laughed. "Really? How good of an actress do you think I am?"
"How should I know, Blake?" Yang retorted, raising her voice as her emotions finally appeared. "You fooled me for a pretty long time into thinking we actually had something."
"We did, Yang. Why do you think I couldn't tell you? I wanted to, and I tried to, but I was terrified of losing you -"
"Why would you even care?"
"Because I was falling in love with you!"
Blake said the words with enough emphasis to draw sidelong looks from the people nearby, but she didn't care. It was the truth, and Yang deserved the honesty now more than ever.
But Yang just stared for a long, long time. Long enough that, eventually, Blake sighed and hung her head. She said everything she could possibly say. She put all of her feelings out in the open. This was the best she could do, and hopefully it was good enough.
"Please don't leave," she whispered one last time, as tears clouded her eyes and her heart clenched in her chest. "I'll withdraw from school as soon as I can. I'll leave. So please…just...for once, do what you want to do."
Knowing this could very well be the last time they ever saw each other, Blake met Yang's gaze and felt a small smile pull at her lips. No matter the circumstances, Yang made her happy. Even now, with her heart broken and her future shattered, she took comfort in that knowledge while walking away.
"Wait."
Blake froze at the word, but several seconds passed before she slowly turned around. Yang still stood there in the hall, struggling with an array of emotions that flashed through her eyes while she searched for words.
"Do you really think I want you to give up your dream?" she finally asked. "Do you think I want you to give up something you've worked so hard for?" Yang shook her head and closed the distance between them. "Do you think I don't care about you at all?" she whispered, her eyes saying even more than her words implied.
She didn't simply care - she cared a lot, and that knowledge swept through Blake's chest like an avalanche. Before Blake could respond, however, the conference room door opened and Yang's agent poked his head into the hall. "Yang," he said before nodding towards the room. "We're waiting."
After motioning for another minute, Yang turned back to Blake.
"Say it again."
"Say...what?"
"Why you were afraid of losing me."
While Yang searched her eyes for the answer, Blake realized what she just admitted, and what Yang wanted to hear again.
"I was afraid of losing you because...I was falling in love with you..."
Without breaking eye contact, Yang stepped closer until Blake's skin tingled from their sudden proximity. She couldn't look away from Yang's eyes now, and she couldn't stop the happy thrumming of her heart.
Then she realized what she said wasn't entirely true.
"I...am...falling in love with you."
The words hardly left her mouth before Yang pulled her into a kiss. And the moment their lips touched, everything else melted away. The heartbreak, sadness, fear...all destroyed by Yang's soft lips on hers, tentatively yet firmly expressing forgiveness. Blake could have stayed in that moment forever, but Yang ended the kiss first.
"Thank god you're here," she whispered before hugging Blake close and nuzzling into her neck. She sighed and returned the embrace while so many emotions rushed through her mind - happiness...relief...love. Yang's eyes said much of the same as she smiled and rested her forehead against Blake's.
"I'm sorry I was almost too late..." Blake said while running her fingers through Yang's hair. "But you don't have to decide right now," she added with a glance towards the conference room. "You can tell them you need more time to think about it."
"I've already made up my mind."
For a split second, worry spiked through Blake's chest. Then Yang smiled and squeezed her hand.
"Hold on a second," Yang said before taking a few steps away and opening the conference room door. "On second thought," she told the men and women waiting inside. "I'm going to pass. Thank you though."
Their eyes widened and mouths fell open, but they didn't have an opportunity to respond because Yang had already closed the door and hurried back to Blake. "Let's get out of here," she said while taking Blake's hand and hurrying to the exit.
They received more than their fair share of stares as they raced outside, but Yang didn't slow down while crossing the sidewalk and hailing a cab. She didn't pause for a second while opening the passenger door and motioning Blake inside. She didn't hesitate in taking the seat beside Blake, or in telling the driver they were headed to Vale University.
It wasn't until the taxi pulled away from the curb that Yang sighed and Blake processed what just happened. Yang finally did it. She did what she wanted. She said no, she chose happiness, and Blake couldn't be prouder of her.
"Holy shit," Yang breathed out before pulling Blake closer. They were already practically sitting on top of each other, but she didn't mind one bit. As far as she was concerned, the closer they were, the better. "I can't believe you just did that."
"I can't believe you just did that," Blake replied, and Yang laughed.
"Sure, I just turned down tons of money, fame, and adoring fans, but...I don't think I've ever been happier." Yang paused for a moment to think about what she just did, but she didn't look bothered in the slightest. In fact, she looked genuinely happy as she smiled at Blake. "I've missed you."
That was all it took to make Blake's heart skip several beats as she fell even more desperately in love with the girl sitting beside her. "I've missed you too," she whispered before leaning in and capturing Yang's lips with hers.
That kiss was everything she wanted it to be - equal parts passionate, loving, tender, and making up for the time they'd been apart. It was a kiss unlike any they'd shared in the past because there were no secrets between them now, and there never would be again.
When Yang started pulling away, Blake followed, stealing another few kisses before Yang's laugh held her at bay. She still couldn't help but smile when Yang laughed.
"Sure you'll be ok with me when I'm no longer a sun?" Yang asked, her eyes dancing with humor.
"Yang…you don't have to be a supermodel to be my sun. You only need to be who you already are."
When Yang smiled at the response - permission to be herself, for once - Blake leaned in for another kiss.
Her capstone focused on popularity only because popularity made the layers and orbits easier to see and quantify. In reality...everyone was their own sun. Everyone had their own magnetism that drew some people closer and pushed others away. Everyone had their own set of stars and orbits, and were the stars in many other universes, as well.
But that was a thought for another day. Right now, she was just happy to have her personal sun back in her life.