Gwen looked at herself in the mirror one last time and then stared at the dormitory door. She felt as if her heart was about to pound right out of her chest. She felt so nervous. Rubbing her ice-cold hands together she turned to grab the small black backpack Lily had loaned her but when she turned back to face the door she couldn't walk through it. Sitting down on her chest she stared at it for a full minute then it opened and Raven ran through the door.
"Gwen! Would you hurry up? They stop letting people out in…"she glance at her watch,"fifteen minutes. Sirius is beginning to think your standing him up."
"I can't… I can't do it… Raven, I can't. He's not going to like me."
Raven frowned at her then sat down on the bed beside her taking both of Gwen's ice cold hands in hers. She studied them for a moment, those tiny capable hands that had done all the work it had taken her to do in three months in a week then she looked up into her nervous hazel eyes and smiled. "Yes, you can. And if Sirius doesn't like you… then he's an idiot. And last time I check as annoyingly charming as he can be Sirius isn't an idiot. He'll like you. Just…give him a chance."
Gwen looked down at their hands intertwined and she felt the stone warm against her skin then she smiled. "Okay…but I can't stop these butterflies in my stomach and I might not eat anything just to be sure. I don't want to have to throw it up again."
Raven smiled and pulled her off the bed. As she pulled her out of the room she prayed that Sirius would do something right for a change. As sweet as he could be at times he had a knack for putting his foot in his mouth, especially around Gwen.
Gwen took a deep breath hoping it would steady her nerves and then pushed the door open walking down the stairs and into the common room. When her eyes lit on Sirius she couldn't help but smile. He had actually tried to look really nice for a change. His hair had been combed and styled so that it didn't look as if it had just been brushed with his fingers that morning. And he wore jeans and a steel grey shirt the same color as his eyes…
Then he looked at her and smiled and Gwen decided she liked the eyes better than the shirt. "Ready to go?" he asked quietly reaching out with his hand.
For a moment panic burst inside her and she felt the butterflies start fluttering anew. Then she looked at his hand and back up to his smiling face. Stepping down, she had just gripped his hand and reached the second to last stair when a sudden image came to her mind.
This image was more of a feeling then anything else. She tripped as the dark shadows raced around her and then she heard a scream of a man and felt someone slice her arm… then she tried to stop it, more crying out more blood. Must stop before he hurts someone else…
Then she flashed back to the common room and looked up at Sirius. "You okay?"
"Yeah… I just… I'm sort of clumsy, sorry. Come on, we're going to miss our chance if we don't hurry." She said grabbing up her coat and walking to the door and waiting outside for Sirius.
She still felt shaky but when they got outside to Hogsmeade she felt that everything was okay and took his hand again. Everything about the place was wonderful.
Sirius wanted to laugh in delight at how awed and amazed Gwen seemed to be about Hogsmeade. The entire day her eyes had been wide and filled with wonder. They had visited everywhere from Honeydukes to Zonco's joke shop. Now they sat in the Leaky Cauldron having two butterbeers as Gwen looked around the room as if not wanting to miss a single thing. "You're going to sprain your neck if you're not careful." He told her and she turned and smiled at him, something he was sure he'd ever get used to.
"It'd be worth it. I've never seen so much magic in one place. And there are so many different people and places and wonderful things. It's amazing."
"You really haven't ever been around other wizards? Why?" she looked down at her butterbeer and looked sad for a moment and Sirius wanted to kick himself. "If it makes you sad please don't answer me. I didn't mean…"
"No, it's not that. I just…" she sighed and then looked up at him. "I was feeling kind of stupid for forgetting all about mama. You see it's just been me and her since…since Papa died. She sort of blames the wizarding world. And I haven't… that is I've been home tutored. With spells from books she has at home. Nothing major, but enough so I'm not lost here."
"Why does she blame the wizards?"
"Papa worked with the Ministry. I don't know what he did. But one day he…" she paused and looked up at Sirius but she knew she had to tell him. Him only, for now. "He just came in to say goodbye. He had another job to run for the Ministry. I was seven. I don't really remember it well. Him and Mama started fighting. And then he left and mama just broke down crying. She kept saying something was going to happen, she knew it…"
"What happened?"
"He was killed by another wizard. A dark spell, the kind that's not even legal. Mama is never wrong. Not about tragedy…"
"What do you mean?" Sirius couldn't understand. Her mother had known, how? "How did she know?"
Gwen suddenly felt trapped. She shouldn't have said anything… then the door to the Leaky Cauldron opened and she looked up in time to see Raven, Remus and James walk in. Sirius swung around to see them and they headed over. Sirius frowned. He had wanted to know more about Gwen.
"Hello, old chap, how has your day been?" James said as he slid into the stool closest to Sirius.
"Fine, until you showed up," he murmured more to himself than anything thing else.
"Aww… I think he's mad at us for interrupting." Raven said as she sat in the chair that Remus held out for her. "Cheer up, Sirius. You've had her to yourself all day. It's our turn to say hello. It's almost time to head back now anyway."
Sirius settled back in his chair. Raven was right, once again, besides he could talk to Gwen about it later. Feeling suddenly more charitable he smiled. "So how was your guys' day?"
Later back at the common room Gwen wished Sirius good night and headed up to the girls' dormitory feeling she was ready to fall asleep on her feet. But Lily and Raven were waiting for her sitting snug as a bug on a rug smack in the middle of her bed.
"Well, hello, you two." She said as she set her bags by her trunk and started changing into her pajamas.
"So, how was it?" Raven asked when she sat on the bed with them brushing her hair.
"Oh it was wonderful. Not a butterfly in sight. We went all over the place. I've seen so many amazing things. The candy shop and that joke shop… It was wonderful. Hogsmeade itself… it's like it's coated with magic. I loved every minute of it."
"And Sirius? He didn't stick his foot in his mouth again, did he?"
"He was wonderful, but now I think I'm going to bed. And if two certain someones would move, I could."
Lily and Raven moved to their own beds and then they lights went out as all the girls settled in for the night. But Gwen felt too restless to sleep. Turning over she sat up suddenly as a thought crossed her mind.
"Raven?"
"Mmm?"
"I'm in trouble… I think… I might… be falling in love. With Sirius. But I can't… can I?"
Raven rolled over and then Gwen heard the even pattern of her breathing and knew her friend was out for the night. Sitting back down she pulled the necklace out and stared at the gem.
She blew on it lightly and small sparks flew into the air. "Show me Sirius."
The sparks circled round and round each other and then there was his loveable smiling face. He couldn't sleep either. He lay on his bed hands behind his back staring at the ceiling a smile on his face. Then his eyes shifted as if something had caught his attention and he looked straight at Gwen.
For one heart stopping moment Gwen stared back then she swiped the sparks away and cut the image. Her heart was pounding all the more and she lay back down. What had she been thinking? Laying down she closed her eyes and tried to sleep.
Sirius gazed up at the ceiling. He had almost been sure that he had seen a glow coming from up there. Maybe he was just tired. He should get some sleep. He should… but he couldn't.
Looking over to the bed on either side of him he wondered if his friends were awake too. James was out, no doubt about it. He could hear the snoring all the way over here. Looking to his other side he wondered if Remus was.
"Go to sleep, Sirius. I can't sleep with you sitting there staring at me."
"You up, Remus?" he said smiling.
"I am now. What is it?"
"I can't sleep."
"Gwen?"
Sirius nodded. "She's something else, Remus. Something special, but she's got so many layers… so many secrets. Some… I'm not sure I want to know… Some I have to know if I want to get to know her. But she just won't let me."
"Things take time, Sirius. Now get some sleep. You won't be able to win her over if you fall asleep in her lap… or maybe you will. Being you and…oof!"
The pillow hit him smack in the face, right where Sirius had aimed. Sirius laughed and Remus tossed it back at him. "Good night, Remus."
Remus grunted and rolled over. And Sirius lay back down and closed his eyes. But he saw her all over again. Smiling that sunshine bright smile that made him want to give her the world and hurt anyone who took it away. Himself included.
He looked over at Remus. "You were right…" he murmured just loud enough so his friend couldn't hear him. "I'm in love… now what do I do?"