A/N: Well, the story seems to be coming along okay but I have some notices for all the loyal readers. Some thing have changed just a bit. First off, Gwen's wand. As someone (Cookie Monster's Crystal Ball)pointed out to me it is the most evil act to kill an unicorn so it is being changed. I refreshed my memory by looking at the first book and it is now the hair of a unicorn. I apologize now for anyone who was in any way offended by this. I wrote the chapter sometime in the middle of the night so excuse me, please.
Also, yes, Gwen does stutter. She is unbearably shy so there are times when she just can't get the words to come out right. Plus since this is the very first time she has ever been anywhere near wizards everything is brand-new to her. Couple that with a secret, a cute guy she can't even talk around and she has this whole realm of insecurities to face. But that doesn't mean she doesn't have a backbone. Read on and you'll see what I mean.
Also as an aside to dizappearingirl they are fun to write but I'll try not to keep you hanging on for too long. Anyway, enough of me talking. Enjoy the next chapter in Gwen's story...

Chapter 8

When Gwen finally woke up the first thing she noticed was the way her head felt like it was full of cotton, her limbs felt like lead and that she wasn't in the girls' dormitory. She looked around the room and saw that the walls were a pale white wash and the floors were a dingy grey tiles. And beside her was a row of beds that looked all looked exactly the same right down to the steel frame and the white spreads.

Then a strict looking witch wearing deep raspberry robes walked in. She wore an apron over that and a hat that cover most of her graying hair but what slipped out and framed her tight gaunt face. Eyes that were the color of robin's eggs stared out at the word with a shrewd, professional look.

Gwen's first thought was she was a nun from all her strict appearance then she drew even with the bed and then gave a quick pleased nod. "Good, your awake. Your friends will be pleased."

"Wha… Where- where am I? Who are you?"

"You're in the hospital wing, dear child, and I am Madam Pomfrey. You've been asleep for nearly a week…"

"A week?" Gwen tried to leap out of the bed but when her feet hit the floor her knees buckled underneath her and Madam Pomfrey had to help her back into bed.

"Yes, a week. Though I must say that I would have thought better of you. Every clairsentient knows that she or he must meditate every week or else… well, you now know what happens. And just to be sure this never happens again you are to visit with me ever Friday from now on so I can monitor your psychic energy."
"But how do you…?"

"Headmaster Dumbledore was sure I knew. Now how do you feel?"

Gwen stopped trying to figure out what Madam Pomfrey was saying and concentrated on the questions. "Drained and confused. My mind doesn't seem to be working right now."

"And your name is?"

"My full name? Or the one on all the records."

"Full name if you can remember it."

"Gwendolyn Dacha Gene Epiphysis Farr." Madam Pomfrey looked down at her paperwork and then gave a tight grimace that Gwen supposed past for a smile.

"Good. Your mother is…?"

"Carina Rend Ernst Junta Farr."

"And father?"

For a second then Gwen shook her head and concentrated on making her lips move. "Gideon Coda Wulfric Farr. Madam Pomfrey, I'm fine. I just need to clear my head."

"You remember where you are?"

"Yes, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I'm fine, now can I see my friends, please?" Madam Pomfrey stared at her eyes narrowed. "Just five minutes. I've missed so much already."

"Alright, five minutes. At least I can get that Black off my back about seeing you. He hasn't been away from the hospital wing long enough to do more than eat, do homework and go to class. He and that Hawkins girl and their friends, Lupin and Potter, even Miss Evans has been taking turns waiting until you awake."

"They have? Really?"

"Yes, now I'll go let them in. But only five minutes, Miss Farr. Then you shall be off to bed again. If you're lucky you might be able to get out of bed sometime before you miss too much more class."

She opened the door and a minute later Raven, Remus, James and Lily burst through the door. Right away Raven and Lily ran to her bedside and hugged her close.

"Are you alright?"

"What happened?"

"I'm fine, really. I mean it. I just… I overworked myself. I'll be fine. Madam Pomfrey says that I'll be out soon. I hope soon enough. What have I missed?"

"Five minutes, Miss Farr." Madam Pomfrey said impatiently from across the room.

"Never mind, you can tell me later. But… where's Sirius? He was here wasn't he?" she looked from each of her friends and then she saw him standing in the doorway. "Sirius."

His hair was standing up and sticking out worse than James' own hair and his face looked gaunt and tired. But when his eyes reached hers she saw the happiness and warmth that had always been there.

"Hi, Gwen. How are you feeling?" he said as he came up beside the bed.

"Kind of out of it… I'm okay. Thanks for… for the lift though. I wouldn't have made it here." She said as her hands twisted her sheets, the only sign she was nervous.

"Yeah, well, it's nothing. I brought you… something…"

"What?"

He pulled his hands out of his pockets and pulled out a chocolate frog. "Thought you'd like one."

"What is it?"

"A chocolate frog." Taking it from his hands she stared at the wrapping before she slowly opened it up. For a moment she held it in her hand and then suddenly it jumped out of her hand and onto the spread in front of her.

Laughing she looked at it then at Sirius. He was grinning at her and she scooped it up giving her time to concentrate on not blushing. "You're supposed to eat it."

Looking down at the chocolate frog that was wiggling in her hands she shook her head then looked up at him with a "you've got to be kidding" look.

"Really, it's good. It tastes like chocolate," he said urging her to try it.

Looking at it for a second Gwen took a tiny bite from the frog then after tasting it took a bigger bite as her empty stomach seemed to clench at the thought of having food in it. "Thank you." she managed and looked up at Sirius and noticed the others had already left.

"It's okay. Remus, James and me have been in here long enough to know that you don't get fed unless you wake up…" he paused for a moment then leaned down and captured her hands leaning his forehead on hers and sighed. "Don't ever do that to me again, Gwendolyn. You scared about ten years off my life."

"Sorry, but just so you know it wasn't a fun experience."

"What happened?"

"I…" Gwen searched for the words to tell him. She wanted to tell him all of it. The truth about who she was. The truth about why she was here.

"Ten minutes is up, Mr. Black. My patient needs her rest. You may come see her same time tomorrow. And if she is rested she will be released in three days. No, off you go."

"Just one more thing, Madam Pomfrey." He said then leaned down and kissed Gwen softly on the cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Gwen couldn't find her voice and simply nodded as Sirius walked out. Then she turned to Madam Pomfrey who huffed out something that sounded suspiciously like, "Young love…"

Love… Love? No it can't be love… Sirius doesn't fall in love and I can't fall in love. Not unless I tell him the truth. I will not fall in love with someone before telling him about who I am. I will not be my mother. No… I can't… but I already am…

Madam Pomfrey handed her a strange looking liquid and she stared at it for a moment before drinking it down. As she did the feeling of drowsiness surrounded her and her last thought before dreamless sleep took her was, "I have to stay away from Sirius…"

Sirius just couldn't understand it. He and Gwen seemed to have gotten more and more separated since her return from the hospital. She had returned to rushing about. Doing late assignments and homework. She never had time to see him. No, change that. She never made time to see him and talk to him.

Stalking the common room at nearly ten at night he made a decision. He had to talk to her again. He'd probably scared her off with that kiss of his. He knew he shouldn't have but he couldn't help it. She had looked so helpless and he had felt useless. He just needed the reassurance that she was still alive. Still really there…

The next morning Sirius cornered Raven before she rushed out the door to breakfast. "Where is she? She left earlier, didn't she? Where did she go?"

"She's with Madam Pomfrey, getting checked up." Raven answered quickly without asking why or anything, as he would have expected her to do. "Then she'll be in class. At lunch she's in the library. And after the other classes in here."

"But every evening she leaves. Where does she go?"

"The astronomy tower, to clear her mind. I wouldn't have told you but she's worrying me. She doesn't seem to be… well, she's distance herself from all of us as if she thinks she's got some rare disease and she keeping it from us. Maybe you can talk some sense into her."

"I'll try."

And try he did. He missed her at lunch. Or more like she dodged him keeping out of his way until just before the bell rang and then rushing by said she didn't want to be late for class. And in class she pretty much ignored him. Saying only that she had a lot on her mind when he asked her why she was rushing around so much. But the faint blush on her neck told him otherwise. When they were in the common room he didn't risk it. There were too many people.

So he waited and when she got up and swiftly left the room he moved over to James who nodded and handed him the invisibility cloak. Then he was off wrapping the cloak around himself and rushing towards the corridor he knew would get him to the astronomy tower first.

And when she reached the top of the stairs he watched as she slowly leaned on the farthest wall and looked up at the stars. Tears glistened in her eyes and she whispered to the night as if it were a friend she could trust.

"I can't keep doing this… I can't keep lying to my friends… They've done so much for me and they deserve better. I wish I could just tell them. Oh, mama why did you make me promise? It's not right… I'm going to tell them. They deserve to know the truth, even if it means that they won't want to see me anymore..."

Sirius listened to her and then backed behind large stone section. What was it she was hiding? And why had her mother made her promise not to tell. He leaned out and looked at her looking so quiet and lonely. He would find out… but not today… Not today with everything she had been through. But someday soon…