"Gwen, it's time to go…" Raven said stepping back from Gwen's bed and walking to the door to wait. Dressed for the occasion she looked like something straight from the frontlines. Her army boots were on her feet, which surprised Gwen since she was so quiet as she walked; black cargo pants and a camouflage shirt finished the ensemble. Her hair was pulled back into a short ponytail and on top of that she wore a camouflaged cap angled rakishly across her forehead. But missing from her face was the usual twinkle of devilment…
Gwen nodded and slipped from beneath the covers. She was fully dressed as well. But in jeans and a halter-top, more ordinary clothes, instead. The halter-top was an old army shirt that had belong to Raven's eldest brother, Daniel, that Lily had altered for her in case she wanted to use her wings, so she wouldn't have to worry about ripping any clothes. As she slipped her shoes on she felt her heart pounding in her chest… just like the night she had left her own home…
Shaking away her thoughts she pulled her wand from the pocket of her robes and slipped it into the back pocket of her jeans. Just in case. You never knew and she was a little worried. Even with the thoughts lingering in her mind she pushed them as far away as possible. She needed to concentrate on Remus, after all.
She quickly pulled her hair into a ponytail high on her head and then followed Raven out into the common room. Sirius, James, Remus and Peter were quietly waiting for them. Like Raven they were dressed in dark clothes, except Remus, who was still dressed in his school clothes. Though his tie was missing and his shirt was already sticking to him in places…
Their faces glowed in the firelight and they all seemed nervous. Already Gwen could see that Remus was having trouble standing on his own. Sweat covered his face. His breathing was shallow and he looked like he was just barely holding himself together. She looked at Raven with a worried glance but she only shook her head. They had to hurry… no time to talk…
Next her gaze landed on Sirius but he only spared a single glance at her before he turned away and started out of the portal. James went first, muttering the "Lumos" and the six of them walked slowly along the corridors in complete silence.
As they walked along she noticed that James and Sirius stuck close to Remus while Peter walked ahead his wand also lit and the Marauder's Map held open in front of him. But more disturbing then that was the fact that the corridors were so quiet. All the torches in the hall were extinguished and except for a few complaining portraits, things were utterly silent.
Even Peeves seemed suspiciously absent… Gwen watched Sirius' back all the way there and felt worry start in her stomach. Was what I said still bothering him?
Soon they exited the Hogwarts castle and the cool breeze blew across her face. Taking a deep breath she looked up at the sky. Clouds hovered over the stars and just near the horizon the last lingering rays of the sun were dying a silent death. Looking from the sky she saw Remus collapse onto James and Sirius' waiting shoulders.
"It's… happening too fast…" she heard him mutter and he seemed to feel a shock of something. He's trying not to change…
She glanced up to the sky again and saw the moon just begging to peek from the clouds. She saw that Sirius and James' were struggling with Remus down the hill so she ran after them until Raven finally stepped in front of them. She muttered a charm. When she looked up and saw Gwen's questioning gaze she answered the silent question.
"It's a numbing spell. It'll help him control the wolf… Come on we don't have much time. The clouds won't hold for long." She said the last part as she looked up at the sky.
James and Sirius nodded and Raven went behind Remus taking the job of supporting him. Then the boys began to change. Suddenly Peter was shrinking down and down and down… Then his hair seemed to cover his entire body, his clothes morphing until it was the same white-blonde shade as all of the hair on his head. A tail sprouted and suddenly a small ball of fur almost white in the grey of the night stood where Peter had. The rat turned and with watery eyes watched as Raven took the map and rolled it up. Wormtail…
Next to him James had already fallen forward and grown antlers. His legs had changed and grew muscled until he stood a good foot taller. His brown hair spread, shortening until a stag's coarse fur covered his body and the only reminder of his identity were the strange markings just below his eyes… the markings of the glasses that had sat on his nose… Prongs…
And Sirius, he had leaned over, and like wildfire his hair spread too. But it became long and shaggy. His bulk seemed to grow larger and his face stretched into a muzzle. His hands seemed to clench and then were changed to paws as big as Gwen's hand. Soon a huge black dog sat where he had, its tongue lolling lazily from his mouth. Only his eyes gave him away. Padfoot…
Raven helped Remus onto Prongs back and then she knelt holding the map in her mouth. As Sirius had her muzzle formed first and her shape changed. But instead of growing she shrank. And as her hair grew across her body it changed from its midnight black to a bright red-orange. The tail grew and the fur spread there too until it reached the end when it changed from black to white in an instant. Like the others soon there was nothing remaining of her friend but hazel eyes intelligent and bright with just the hint of mischief… Raven…
Pulling her wand from her pocket she waved it around herself and muttered the phrase. Her stone floated in front of her and she watched it as it burst forth with light and dust floated around her. Then in a whirlwind of fairy dust she shrunk. It happened so fast that at first when she stood she wasn't even sure that it had happened… until she saw the red-orange fur of Raven.
Moving quickly she pushed her wand back into her pocket and then jumped onto Raven's back. She grabbed the sides with her legs but as Raven started to run she was forced to grab some tufts of hair and leaned down praying she wouldn't be thrown off.
When she was sure that she wouldn't fall off she looked up and saw Remus' pale face and James' powerful legs as he ran alongside them. Beside him raced Sirius with Peter crouched on his back. She glanced up at the clouds and saw the moon was slowly making its way out into the night air. And a chill raced down her back.
Maybe it was just the wind racing across her naked back but she suddenly found herself having a premonition. She glanced over her shoulder but saw only the darkened hillside… Still the feeling persisted. Something was going to happen… but what was it?
Snape watched Potter and his friends slipped out into the night and over the hill. He gripped his wand tightly in his hands and then he looked up to the clouded skies. In his head he could still hear the taunting. He could still feel the humiliation burning through him as Potter had held him up in the air… As Sirius teased him… as Gwen had smiled at him and Malfoy.
"Which one of us is mere?"
He looked up again to the sky and then started across the grounds. He knew where they were headed… But this time he would so more than follow. This time… This time he would see what Perfect Potter and his friends were really hiding…
Soon the tall growth of the Whomping Willow was hovering over them and Peter dashed across the field toward its base. Since clouds still obscured the moon, as he made a dash for the tree, he appeared to be only a small ball of grey-white fur…
Suddenly as if some unknown puppeteer had taken over the tree started to lash and whip wildly. Its great branches pounded on the ground and smashed the ground leaving huge holes in the mud with a great "whomping" sound every time the tree hit the earth.
Gwen looked from the tree to the others but none of them seemed afraid. Sirius sat beside James his great shaggy bulk still in the strengthening moonlight but for his fur that blew in the wind. His eyes seemed intent upon the great tree and Gwen saw no fear and no uncertainty. So she looked back to it as well.
The small ball of fur she knew was Peter had dodged past the whipping branches of the trees narrowly missing being hit by a fraction of an inch each time and made it to the very base of the tree. Racing around he seemed to be searching for something along the base of the tree. And then he found it. Crouching onto his back legs he seemed to lean all his weight onto a knot on the trunk of the tree.
Almost immediately, the tree stopped its thrashing and whipping and once again the night was completely silent. And like a great statue highlighted in the moonbeams the tree stood. Not a leave twitching. Not even as the wind picked up around them.
Then again they were moving and Gwen gripped Raven's back in terror as they headed toward the tree. Peter waited for them standing his ears at attention as they drew nearer then when they were mere inches from his he took off dashing down a small gap between the roots. Gwen watched him disappear and for a moment she was reminded of a story she had once heard from some little girls who had been headed to the wishing well. It had been about a little girl who had chased a rabbit down a hole. What had been her name? …Alice? Yes, that was it.
And because she had slipped down the rabbit hole she had landed in a place so different from her own. A place called Wonderland where everything was as it shouldn't be. Where animals talked and an evil queen could order your head to be chopped off simply because you made her angry…
And as Raven headed towards the whole it occurred to her that Hogwarts had been like her Wonderland. From the moment she had stepped onto the grounds of that great castle it had been as if everything she had ever known had been turned upside down. But like Alice was she doomed to wonder through cursing her mistakes and wishing only that she could go home?
Suddenly the tunnel loomed before her and her thoughts vanished like fairy dust in the night. Her heart pounded in her chest and then she and Raven slid into the hole and down and earthly slope that lead into a small low tunnel that had Gwen been standing on her own two feet, at her current size, would have been tall enough for three Fae her size to stand on one another shoulders. As it was she had just enough room for her head if she stood up straight on Raven's back with maybe three more inches left.
Even so the tunnel seemed to be closing in around them and as they walked on Gwen felt herself wishing that she could talk to Raven. But how could she? Especially since Raven couldn't exactly talk.
« How're you holding up, up there? »
Gwen nearly jumped off Raven's back when she heard her voice in her head but then she heard laughter... Raven's laughter. "R-Raven? I… I hear but… how can you…?"
« How can I speak to you? Well, we're not sure but we can communicate to one another and I figured you'd be able to hear me considering from what I've heard Fairies tend to be more in tune with nature then regular people. We call it sort of… well for lack of better wording… thought-speaking. »
"And the others can do this?"
« Yep… At least if they want to they can. But I get the feeling that you and Sirius had a little fight. What happened yesterday when he chased after you?»
"I… I don't really want to talk about it. At least not now… "
« Okay, but you know I'm here… »
"Yeah. Thanks, Ray…"
« You know that's the first time you've shortened my name… I like it. You should loosen up more like that, Gwen. You know, let go of all of the self-consciousness you have. You've earned the right to at least a little bit of confidence. At least that's what I think. »
Gwen thought about how she had said to Sirius that night on the lakeshore. She had been confident then but… now he was mad at her. Because she had been defending herself against his… well, warranted… but unwanted advice. She had been confident then… Confident he needed to mind his own business. But what if she was wrong?
Raven might be sure she had earned a little confidence but every time she earned some and used it. She used it wrong. Did that mean she really earned it? What if every time she earned some confidence she went and did something stupid… like hurt the people she cared about? …like she had with Sirius?
« We're almost there… Want to look back and see how the boys are doing? » Raven said unconcerned about Gwen worrying inner thoughts.
Gwen nodded against Raven's back and then turned to look over her shoulder. She saw the shadows of Remus with Sirius, still in his dog form right behind him. Behind him was another boy… James. He must't have been able to fit in his stag form so he had changed back. Turning around she noticed the tunnel had begun to widen and it twisted so that they exited into a large and dusty room. A dim light glowed from a single lamp that stood on an old worn and tattered table.
The room itself looked as if someone or something had tried to tear it apart from the inside out. The wallpaper had begun to peel and through it patches of exposed wood had warped with the wear and tear of claws. Along the floor great strains of red dotted everything. They were red and Gwen didn't even want to think of what they could possibly be…
Windows were boarded up and furniture, which some caring soul had obviously brought in out of concern for someone's comfort, had all been smashed and trashed. All around the room there was the mark of claws and teeth and Gwen felt the sheer pain and agonizing loneliness in the air as if someone had taken a can of paint and painted it across the walls in great angry letters.
Gwen felt something twist at her heart and she turned as the others walked in behind them. James quickly changed back into Prongs and with Sirius' help the two of them managed to maneuver Remus up onto his back once more.
To their right was a doorway and with a quick pull on a rope tied around the knob from Sirius the door flew open and they moved through it. They moved on down a gloomy hallway and then up a set of creaky stairs that barely looked fit to walk up. But even then the dust that lay everywhere else was missing here as if…
Something had moved up and down them many times so that no dust could settle… James didn't even pause and he and Sirius walked straight up the stairs and into another room. This one a bedroom. The first thing that Gwen noticed was a magnificent four-poster bed with great hanging that had once been red but were now a pale pink. Other furniture dotted the room. But like that of the first room it was smashed and scratched up and the windows were again boarded up…
James didn't pause here either but moved straight to the tattered bed kneeling slightly so Remus could slip off onto the softness of the bed. With a final heave he got himself comfortable and then lying there on his side he gasped for breath and curled into himself. "It… it's coming fast… faster… than … usual… Have to… be careful…"
Gwen hopped from Raven's back and ran across the room putting her hand on his own hand which was now about as big as she was… And then just like in her dream she turned and saw the others. Of course they were all much larger than she. But there they were. Raven, Sirius, James and perched on Sirius' head, Peter…
The wind howled through the small cracks in the windows and a chill ran down her back. That chill brought on a quick flash of memory… another time. Another transformation too fast to handle. The four of them, the boys, here just sitting and waiting. Remus suddenly transforming and then…
Stop him!
Stop him before he hurts himself!
Remus… Remus…
Suddenly the image changed and she saw Remus talking to Sirius. Walking away from them was Severus. His back to them but something about the way Sirius was acting... There was a smirk on his lips, one of pure hatred. One she had only seen there once… when he had been talking about Severus Snape.
"Sirius, what did you do?" Remus asked
"Remus, its his fault he shouldn't be snooping around…. He's trying to get us expelled…"
"What did you do Sirius?"
"Nothing… I was just teasing him…"
Remus appeared satisfied but Gwen saw something he didn't. Gwen saw that behind his back he had crossed his fingers. And still in his eyes that look. The cold calculated look.
A creaking sound drew her attention and she snapped back to reality… "What did you do Sirius? He's coming…" Gwen whispered it almost to herself but the others heard.
« What? Gwen what is it? » Raven spoke first then Sirius.
« What? What did I do? Who's coming? »
"He's coming… Sirius… Severus is coming… Why? Why did you have to taunt him?"
« I… »
« What? Snivellus is coming? » James cut him off and then in an antsy move seemed to dance in place for a moment.
Gwen nodded. "Down the tunnel…"
« Stay here… » James danced for only another second and then he was racing back towards the tunnel. Slowly his shape changed as he ran.
"Wait what are you going to do?" Gwen asked
"I'm going to stop him," James said as he disappeared out the door and the creaking of the stairs reached their ears.
"Be careful…" Gwen said as he disappeared but she knew he couldn't hear her. She looked back up at Remus and then she looked at the others…
You've earned the right to at least a little bit of confidence...
Raven's words rang in her ears and she frowned for a moment, thinking. Looking back she saw Remus' pale face… He moaned and curled into himself and slowly he began to change… soon he would be full werewolf… Could James get Severus out fast enough and still change before Remus…
…at least a little bit of confidence…
She looked up at Remus and then she knew what she had to do. Without speaking to the others she started to race across the room saying the incantation for her wings in her head. As soon as they were out she took to the air and then in a flair of dust headed out…
« Where are you going? »
Sirius asked her calling her back but she only paused a moment to look back at him as she pulled her wand out. "Where do you think I'm going? I'm going to help James."
Sirius watched as Gwen flew from the room leaving only a trail of fairy dust behind her. « Gwen! Come… back… »
Pacing back and forth for a moment he heard Remus moaned behind him. « Oh… what does she think she's doing? »
« Fixing your mistake… » Raven said from behind him and he turned on her.
« What are you talking about? »
« You brought him here! Didn't you? You just had to go and taunt him. You brought him here and she's going to fix your mistake. »
« I never meant… »
« You never mean anything, Sirius. That's how it always is… » Raven turned away from him then and hopped onto the bed beside Remus. Slowly he had changed and already the hair had coursed across his body. His eyes had changed their shape and already his clothes had been torn and shredded as they always did… It really was a wonder he had any clothes…
Sirius felt terror for his friend welling up in him and also anger that Raven could speak to him in such a way. « And what would you have done? You saw the way he treated Gwen. The things he told her… That slime ball told her she didn't belong here… »
For a moment Raven was silent. Only Remus low and throaty growls filled the room and then she turned from Remus and looked into Sirius' eyes. « Guess you're right… I would've done the same thing. Besides… it would've been funny… Seeing Snivellus' look of pure terror… »
Remus stood up on his wolf legs and Raven tilted her head as she looked up at him. Beside Moony she was tiny. « That doesn't make it… right… » Remus managed to mutter to them and then he lay down his head on his great paws and Raven curled up beside him…
« We know Remus… But… it would be funny… To just once get the better of that great git… » She laid her head down on her paws and looking up at him with her eyes.
For a moment they lay just like that and Sirius felt like an outsider. Peter moved for a better position on his head and Sirius felt stupid. It had been a stupid thing to do but he had been mad. He… A noise drew his attention and immediately Remus sat up growling low in his throat. Sirius sniffed the air… then he spun planting himself firmly in the doorway as Remus leapt from the bed…
« Stay… Stay, Remus… »
But Sirius knew what he had smelled… Prey…
Gwen dashed out into the main room just as Severus walked through the first doorway and James came to the bottom of the stairs. She stood on the top railing of the stairway and watched as the too boys faced each other. Each was breathing rather hard but as soon as they saw the other they straightened.
She heard a growl from behind her and then heard two sounds: a dog barking and a fox yipping. Another growled issued and she knew it was Remus. A crashed sounded and she saw the image of Raven being tossed aside. A yip of pain filled the air and then more barking. Another crash and a howl of pain and she saw Sirius being tossed aside.
Terror went up her spine and she spun to see Remus walking slowly from the room. His amber eyes hazed over… He smelled human… he smelled prey…
"Get out of here, Severus!" James looked up to see Remus.
"It… it's… he's a werewolf…" that was all Severus managed to get out of his lips before Remus jumped up and over Gwen and down into the room. He landed with a great thump but already eyed them.
"Get out of here, Severus!" James yelled and this time he grabbed Severus' arm and started to pull him out. But as soon as the two boys started moving Remus seemed to react. His growl became more pronounced and Gwen knew he was going to attack.
Jumping down she landed right in front of him. "Stop!"
She heard the Severus headed out but then there was total silence as they stood face to face. She was no bigger than six inches tall while Remus had grown and was a huge two-foot wolf. His fur glimmered in the moonlight and Gwen's wings still glistened with residue fairy dust. She barely came to the knee joints and yet that one word she uttered stopped him. "Stop it, Remus…"
His eyes flickered and then as James came up behind her she saw that he had changed once more and with one last look at her then he turned and walked up the stairs… back to Sirius and Raven.