Chapter 6: A new mission
Hiei awoke from his memory to find himself back in his room.
'I should be dead now...why am I here?' He looked down at his arms and saw the bandages tightly wrapped around them. It was then that he remembered.
'Oh God,' he thought, 'Botan. I've hurt her again. She shouldn't have followed me, she should've stayed asleep. Why, why do I always hurt the ones I love? I'm I that horrible of a monster. Not that she'd ever love he anyways. She is too pure and I am too tainted.' He felt his eyes start to water. A tear escaped. He heard it clatter to the ground and form a gem. He stared down at the gem and closed his eyes.
'These tear gems,' he thought, 'another reminder of what I am. The Forbidden child, evil and worthless.' Another tear escaped.
In the next room over...everyone was silent as they heard a teargem hit the floor every few seconds.
"It's sad," Kurama said, "to think about how none of us can relate to him. We never have to hide ourselves because we have families...we have friends. Hiei has had none of those his entire life. He's afraid of what his only sister will say if she finds out he's her brother and he thinks we all hate him. He hates himself so much that he's prayed to die and he screams in his sleep at times. I thought he was over this but I guess it was just a matter of time before he cracked again." At that point Yusuke slammed his fists into the wall and said, "Let me talk to the little bastard. Maybe if I have to I can knock some sense into him." With that he stormed out of the room
Hiei looked up as Yusuke came in and locked the door behind him.
"You asshole," Yusuke said to him as he walked closer to the Jaganshi, "just what the fuck were you thinking?"
"Go away." Hiei said simply. Yusuke walked up to Hiei and punched him in the face.
"I'm not leaving until you answer my question. Now answer or I'll just hit you again"
"Try me." So Yusuke punched him again and again. But still no answer came. Hiei just sat there and stared ahead emotionlessly as blood started flowing from his nose.
"It would be a lot easier if you would just answer me." Yusuke said. Hiei could sense Yusuke's mind straining. He could sense that Yusuke was sick at the thought of hitting him. Yusuke tried again to beat some answers from the demon, hoping Hiei would give up or at least try to defend himself. But he did not. Finally, Yusuke gave in and said, "Hiei please, I hate doing this to you. Just tell me why you did what you did. You obviously have no idea how much you hurt us. We're your friends, Hiei. We care about you. Now tell us what is wrong." Hiei looked darkly up at Yusuke.
"How dare you call yourselves my friends if you don't even know me"
"Of course I know you! You're Hiei. You're fearless, strong, loyal, and you would never willingly kill yourself"
"Ha! You only know the mask"
"Well then teach me"
"What"
"You say I don't know the real you so teach me"
"No. Go away, I don't want anyone to know the real me"
"Why not"
Hiei looked up at Yusuke with dark, emotionless eyes.
"Because everytime I let someone get close to me I end up slowly killing them"
Yusuke walked back into the other room and said, "I got nothing out of him"
"It doesn't matter," Koenma said, "You all got your shots yesterday and he got his while he was passed out. So it's time to give you your next mission."
"Koenma," Botan interupted, "You're not seriously thinking of sending Hiei off on a mission in this state"
"I am," Koenma said, "Hiei needs to get his mind off of things"
"NO!" Botan yelled, "He can't go on a mission. Not yet. It's too soon! Kurama, please tell me you think so too"
"I do," Kurama said, "It's far too soon to bring him with and it will only do more damage than it will help"
"Alright then, it's settled," Kenma said, "Hiei will not go with. But he will go on the next mission regardless of what any of you say! Your currant mission deals with a group of demons who have gotten through to the human world and have been going through towns killing humans for fun. All the information you need is in here." He handed each of them a packet. "Capture the demons dead or alive, it doesn't matter which. It might take a while though since it's a far off area and they are relatively strong." The group started to leave when they saw Hiei waiting expectingly by the door.
"Hiei," Kurama said gently, "we can't take you with this time and-" He was cut short by the demon.
"You don't...want me"
"No!...It's not that." Kurama was interupted again by Hiei who looked darkly at the ground and said, "Hn. Figures. No one else does either." Then he walked away and sat on a windowsill.
"We should get going." Yusuke said.
"Right, bye Hiei." Kurama said. Hiei stared out the window and said nothing. Kurama sighted when he realized he wasn't getting a response from his friend and left. As he walked away with the others, he looked back and saw Hiei sitting on the windowsill, stareing at them with a look of hurt betrayel in his eyes.
So that's my latest chapter. Hope you liked it. In the next one: It's been a week since the others left and Hiei is feeling like shit. He hasn't eaten nor drank for a while and he hasn't spoken to anyone. He feels alone so he once more tries to end it. Will it work this time?
SO that's in the next chapter. Please R/R everyone!