AN: I know; I know. It's late. You really shouldn't be surprised by now, right?

Disclaimer: Well, since Naruto's not a girl…

Puberty Sucks

Part 3 of… Damnit! Miscalculated again!

Naruto gulped, beginning to inch away from Sasuke. "I… I meant to hit you!" She squeaked, paling. She was soabout to get creamed.

He looked ready to hit her, bite her, punch, kick…kiss? Yes, kiss.

She was grabbed by the front of her shirt and pulled down again, mouth almost bruised from the force of Sasuke's lips crushing against hers. Sasuke groaned as her belly pressed into his lap, his hands tugging her short hair for leverage. When he finally pulled away he was panting, his eyes dilated and lips swollen.

She stared up at him, her own lips kiss-bruised and as pink as the pretty blush on her whiskered cheeks. Before either of them realized what she was doing, she crawled into his lap, kissing him again, clutching his face with her trembling hands. When she pulled away, she looked up at him, trembling. "God… you have no idea how long I've dreamt of that… And God, it's a helluva lot better than in those dreams…"

At the moment she didn't care if it was lust; it just felt so good. She knew that if it was though, it'd hurt her later.

Sasuke couldn't speak. 'Dreams? She dreamt of this? For how long?' He'd only just begun to understand that strange force pulling him towards the blonde when they'd kissed the first accidental time. It had grown ad morphed into some sort of new butterfly, now close to the gate of its cocoon, ready to fly free. He counted several heartbeats before swallowing down the butterfly a few more notches and pushed her nose first into a pillow.

She gave a muffled yelp as her face was pressed into soft cushion.

"D-Dobe, go to sleep," He all but rasped, shifting his weight off the bed. He was in the bathroom in three long strides, shutting and locking the door swiftly. Only when he was sure she wasn't going to follow him did he allow himself the leisure of running his hand over the front of his shorts. His head made a soft 'thunk' against the door as he chewed on his bottom lip. Now was not the time to be acting on horny teenage hormones. Not when she was like this, not when things were upsetting for her, and most certainly not when they were just figuring things out between them.

They were young. They had time.

As he kneaded himself to the peak of no-sticky-return, he had a stray thought from the Inner Sasuke.

'You don't have condoms around here anyway.'

By the time Naruto had righted herself, he had shut the bathroom door and locked himself inside. She scowled. It was afternoon! Like hell if she was going to sleep. Irritated, she stood up, rubbing her shoulders. "Bastard."

She really didn't want to stay now. She felt uncomfortable being around someone that she didn't know what she felt. She had had dreams about kissing him and beating the shit out of him afterwards. Maybe that henge being kept up for all the years gave her an abnormal boost of testosterone for a girl.

Besides, she didn't get what Sasuke was feeling either. Damn bastard was more moody than a room full of PMSing teenage girls.

Grabbing her wet clothes, she slung them over her shoulder and slipped her shoes on before quietly unlocking the door, opening it and closing it behind her. Walking down the stairs of the apartment complex, she muttered "henge" under her breath, turning into Boy Naruto with his regular clothes and began to trot toward her house.

By the next day, word was out. Naruto was a girl. Tsunade had made it clear to the citizens that nothing was to change in their behavior toward the girl. Anyone caught disobeying would still be taught the 'lesson' as preset by the fourth. And Naruto was given a memo to carry on.

Easy for the old hag to say.

She hadn't came out of her house since. She'd skipped practice, had locked her door, pulled down the shades in her apartment and refused to answer the door. She was glad she didn't have a telephone. She didn't even go to Ichiraku's. To pass time, she would train her chakra control or ready up on jutsus. Yes, she had a hard time reading kanji, but it was better than the looks and questions she'd receive from her peers. And she could avoid Sasuke (And his fan-club).

So far it was going OK, but she was running out of food. More specifically, ramen.

By the fifth day, Kakashi all but crawled to the door.

"Naruto… come on…" He knocked softly. "You really have to come out. Hiding's not going to do anything but make it worse."

Naruto ignored him, going back to her task of cleaning the dishes in her sink, swatting the monstrous moldy creation in the corner with a spatula. …She withdrew her weapon to find half of it bitten off. She resumed tending to plates instead.

Kakashi knocked harder. "Naruto, I will force you. Don't make me do it."

Her right brow twitched as she squeezed the sponge she was holding. It wheezed in response and she glared at it. Muttering something, she left a clone in her place and retreated to her balcony where she could climb to the roof.

But, lo and behold, Kakashi met her there, yanking her up off her feet by her collar. On the ground, the clone of Kakashi waved at her smugly before 'poofing' into midair.

Caught, damnit!

She was all but dragged to the training grounds, leaving a clawed up trail behind her. Kakashi handled her well; in fact, it was amazing he was single and didn't have kids. He certainly knew how to deal with them.

"Let me go you perverted old man!" Naruto snarled, twisting in his grip. "You don't own me! I can damn well do what I want!"

Her nails dug into his skin and the look on her face was enough to make any normal man wet his pants.

But Kakashi was no normal man. Unlike Iruka, he wasn't whipped.

Depositing her on the ground beside a tree, he crouched down and did something he had never done before. He pulled his mask down.

"Read. My. Lips." He said slowly, tone leaving no room for her case. "You are a ninja and as a ninja you are to do as ordered. The hokage ordered you to carry on as normal and if you ever want to become hokage yourself you will have to learn that you will go nowhere with a hard head an unwillingness to follow orders."

Her face scrunched up in anger as she gripped his mask and pulled him closer. "I damn well understands what it means to be a ninja but lemme tell you something, sensei. A lot of people don't know what it means to be a moral man. I would know. Baba doesn't." She pushed him away and dusted himself off. "Let's get this over with. What the hell are we doing today? Training? Find that woman's cat again? Or just torturing me for wanting to work out my demons myself?"

Kakashi felt the need to heave a sigh as he pulled his mask up again before anyone saw. Rolling his eyes skyward he playfully rapped his knuckles over her skull playfully and motioned to a spot amongst the sparring bodies where Sakura was fighting with Sasuke. Or more like attacking while he dodged.

"Actually, we were training today. But since it's been a hard day for you, I'll let you and your teammates decide on what to do."

"Shut up. I can do the damned training. Don't treat me like I'm a frail little girl. Baba said no different, right? Then you'll treat me like I am Naruto the loudmouth, idiotic, brainless, Sakura-loving boy that I pretend to be." With that, she loosened the drawstring of her pants before raising her henge, allowing her to look like Boy Naruto.

"I didn't mean it like that," Kakashi muttered, again rolling his eyes. "And stop with that. There's no use for it now." He patted her back.

She scowled, pulling away. "There's more use for it than you think, even if it's just subconscious or psychological." Wow… Naruto really did know big words.

Sasuke had forced himself to not look across the field and meet Naruto's gaze. Hard as it was, all he could allow himself was small, stolen glances. One of which caught him seeing Kakashi's hand patting her mid-back, lowering.

He shoved at Sakura a little too hard, knocking the girl backwards into the area Neji was practicing. The Hyuuga sucked in his breath as he managed to deflect several kunai from the girl's range, only slightly startled at her accidental intrusion.

Sasuke panted, wiping at his mouth, sweating for more reasons than just training for four hours straight.

"Sakura. Lunch. Now." He gritted out, all but stomping towards Kakashi.

Sakura opened her mouth to protest but the aura he was emitting was enough to send her back. She apologized to the Hyuuga before slowly trailing after Sasuke toward Kakashi.

Naruto ignored Sasuke approaching them and went off to a corner of the training field, warming up with stretches and ignoring any stares cast her way.

Passing Naruto was like rubbing sandpaper together. It hurt, but like the Uchiha he was, he did not wince, or show any emotion over it. Instead he sat back by the tree and ate his lunch without a word. He knew Kakashi was watching him, but he ignored it.

"I'm going." He announced before even finishing his lunch.

Naruto didn't hear him, too busy working up a sweat against a myriad of clones. She felt protected within them because few could tell which one was the real her. She kept her guise up, refusing to let it fall. Too many thoughts swarmed in her head and her focus was off. Finally she gave a frustrated yell as the clones disappeared and threw her fist into a tree, splintering it in two.

Turning, Naruto, stormed over to Kakashi. "There. I trained. I will report for missions and training but other than that, you can't control what I do." She turned and stormed off, anger radiating from her being.

Nonplussed, Kakashi spoke to Sakura, enough to send hairs rising along both Naruto and Sasuke's neck.

"Well, at least one of my pupils isn't lost in their own world. Come on Sakura. Let's go train." He took the girl's hand and tugged her away, retreating. The little smile on his face was missed entirely.

Naruto scowled at Kakashi, flipping him off as the man walked away. She glanced briefly at Sasuke, debating on what to say.

"That bastard thinks he knows everything just because he's old." Sasuke was muttering to himself, though it could be construed as camaraderie. It was hard to tell with Sasuke. Then again, anything was hard to tell with him.

When it became obvious to the blonde that Sasuke was just following his lead, it was also made clear that even Sasuke was debating what to say.

Naruto just looked at him expectantly, deciding to be the indifferent bastard for a change. She wasn't in the wrong here.

"Nh..." He rubbed his neck when they were out of range of the training grounds, stopping. The vertebrae popped as he rolled it, eyes closing. "I don't know what Tsunade's teaching her, but she punches too hard." He muttered.

"You're avoiding. I didn't know the great Uchiha Sasuke avoided." Naruto replied flatly, not moving her eyes from him.

"What, you want to talk about it? Fine." Sasuke glared at her. "What do you want to talk about?"

She folded her arms. "I'd like an explanation for last week's behavior. First you're nice, which was hard enough to believe then you all but push me away and didn't say another word. I'd like you to make up your mind. Are you disgusted with me or just playing around with me for payback of being a boy all the time I knew you? I'd like to know before I decide on how hard to hit you."

"I was nice because you were upset and confused. And I didn't say another word because you left before I could talk to you." He gave her a look, crossing his arms as well. "And I'm not disgusted with you."

"Gee thanks. Nice to me because I was upset and confused. I could get that from Iruka, asshole. I don't want you to treat me differently while I'm a wreck then go back to being a bastard as soon as I seem to be all right. You locked yourself in your bathroom without a word. I wasn't going to wait around for you to decide on how you were going to act. You acting like that makes me uncomfortable."

"Look, I..." He struggled. Flustered, he refused to meet her gaze. "I liked you. And just when I was getting comfortable with it, it changed. And then I was just... I don't know." He looked at her then, face reddening. "And I didn't want to ruin it any further by doing something that would have made you even more uncomfortable."

She looked at him blankly. "Maybe if you had asked, I would have told you how I felt. Don't assume things about me because in reality, Sasuke, you don't know much about me. There are things I will not tell you. But there are things that if you just ask, you'll find out. I really like you. I have since I was old enough to understand little things like crushes. I never acted on it. I'm not some stupid girl who cares more for being pretty. I'm a ninja. I wanted to be one. I wanted to prove that I could be someone. I played pranks for attention because without it, I would go insane. Even if it was irritation it was enough to get me through the day. The reason I was dead last in the class was because I couldn't perform jutsus when all my concentration and chakra control was pushed toward that one genjutsu. Iruka knew that but he couldn't treat me different. And finally? I suck at book smarts. So there you have it: The summary of the life of Uzumaki Naruto, sans the really gruesome parts; a little schoolgirl wannabe ninja with a crush on the number one rookie and the grades of an idiot."

With that, she dusted her hands on her hips. "And on a final note, 'liked?' Past tense? It doesn't take much for you to get over your crushes." She frowned before turning and walking off, shoving her hands in the pockets of her sweatpants. Her head hung low in thought as she stared at the road.

"Because I don't anymore... It's...different." Sasuke stammered, all but running after her. "Because it's...it's not some nameless thing...or a crush." He had her by her upper arm now, matching her feet pace for pace. "It's..." He stopped, forcing her to stop and looked down at her.

"Will you go out with me?" He found himself saying, his voice a little higher than intended and his mind not exactly processing how out of character he was being.

Naruto actually tripped, catching herself before landing face-first in the dirt. There was an echo across Konoha that sounded roughly like this:

"WHAT!"

She stared at him with the widest eyes she could given her current appearance before frowning, face darkening. "Your sense of humor sucks, Sasuke. Badly."

"It's not a joke!" He frowned, brow furrowing.

Naruto stared at him mutely, her face frozen in what one could describe as complete and utter disbelief. Her genjutsu dropped completely as her pants sunk low on her hips and her hair fell some. "I..." she bit her lip, contemplating. "It won't be good for your reputation. And I'm not just talking about your fan-club."

"Since when have I cared what people think?" He scoffed, tugging her pants up some for her. He played with the drawstring, tightening the waistband for her. "Besides... you like me."

He crinkled his nose a little. "Dead last with a crush on the number one rookie."

Her face reddened from both his actions and words. "Sh-shut up!" She squeaked, pushing him away, flushed. "I'll ruin my reputation if I go out with you!" She tried, sputtering some.

"Dobe, what reputation?" He drawled. Teasing. Uchiha Sasuke was teasing. He leaned his sore neck to look at her, craning slightly. "Number one rookie with a crush on dead last."

She wrung her hands together like a certain Hyuuga, looking down at her feet, cheeks aflame. "OK." It was barely a whisper for she was too embarrassed to look up at him. It was so un-Naruto-like that one would have done a double-take.

"Okay then." He hummed, acting as if it was as simple as that, and maybe… maybe it was that simple. He took hold of one of her hands, hesitantly grasping it loosely. "Now let's get something to eat. I'm sure you're starving right?" He asked, trying to look as normal and unfazed as possible.

The concept of holding hands was foreign to her. It felt strange, but not… unpleasant. She inwardly smirked when she realized her hands were just as calloused as Sasuke's. Few girls could say that. Upon his inquiry she looked to the side, biting her cheek. "Maybe."

She found herself shifting their hands until her fingers wove within his, locking their hands together. "Ramen?" She inquired hopefully, though she'd eat wherever he took them.

"If you want." He chuckled. "Or we could go shopping. I bet you're out of food at home after a week's sit out."

She blushed a bit. "Yeah...but I didn't bring my wallet with me. Kakashi dragged me outta the house before I had a chance to properly dress."

She didn't bother putting her genjutsu up. Besides, with Sasuke she felt safe. Though she was just as strong as he was, she added smugly.

"I'll get it." Sasuke shrugged. "How much could ramen cost?" He smirked at her, tugging her hand so that their arms twined about. She felt safe with him, and he felt… free.

Grocery shopping with Sasuke was a bit more entertaining than expected. He haggled better than a housewife. The butcher looked absolutely crosser than a polecat when he was tricked into giving up good beef for half price.

"Now, for that salmon and shrimp over there..." He pointed, barely showing his amusement to Naruto when the butcher hissed in frustration.

Naruto giggled the entire time, teasing Sasuke about his "housewife skills." "I don't need all of this you know. I mostly eat ramen."

"I'm getting my groceries too. Unlike you I don't live on just ramen."

"It's full price or nothing!" The butcher demanded.

"You must be joking. I can smell it all the way on the other side here. It's going bad in that tank you've got it in!" Sasuke's voice rose a bit, passersby noticing. Being an Uchiha could be good for business, or bad. Sometimes his reputation came in handy.

The butcher slammed a pound of each product on the counter for 30 percent discount and stalked off to the back, as Sasuke put the packages in their basket.

"Heh. Score." He muttered.

"Hey, ramen is good, teme!" Naruto whined, stepping behind Sasuke as inconspicuously as possible when people looked at them.

"I never said it wasn't. It's just not good to eat nothing BUT that." He took her hand again, his other holding the slowly filling basket. "You need to try other things." He got vegetables, and added them to the basket, before they went to the ramen isle. He picked out Naruto's favorite ones easily, without question.

He may not have known everything, but he knew important parts.

"Hmm… what for dessert?" He pondered.

Naruto bounced a bit at him knowing her favorite types of ramen but stopped when he said dessert. "You don't like sweets, baaaaka." She tugged his hand a little, grinning up at him with that vulpine grin of hers. "Maybe we should get a chocolate cake and make you eat it all!"

"I don't like overly sweet stuff." He made a face. "Fruits are good though." He wandered the bakery, before stopping on a fruit trifle. It went in the basket as well. He paused, before hitting the checkout, snatching a bottle of chocolate syrup.

She watched incredulously as he grabbed the chocolate syrup. "But that's overly sweet!" She pointed out, confusion etched on her face.

"But you like it, right?" He countered, as they walked outside.

"Of course!" She replied, looking appalled. "Sweets are right up there under ramen!"

"Good. Then stop arguing." He handed her a bag to carry, before taking her hand. He liked doing that, he found. Unlike most people, touching Naruto wasn't bad at all.

She pouted some, grabbing the weight with ease, lacing her fingers through his again. It amused her that Sasuke was so willing to touch her, even if it was her hand. Though that kiss last week… Her cheeks flushed as she pushed the thoughts out of the way. "Now where to?"

"My place." He crinkled his nose. "It's clean."

"Hey! I cleaned mine last week! And the mold is… somewhat under control…" She retorted, pouting.

"And my kitchen's a little better too." He was teasing her again.

Naruto remembered the kiss at his place again, cheeks flushing pink before finishing her argument with, "Yeah? Well... ...argh!"

"Besides, it's quieter there. The complex is better and has thicker walls." He paused at a crosswalk, their shoulders touching.

She rolled her eyes, giving up.

The walk back was quiet. So quiet that it was like they were asleep in a dream.

It was somewhat disappointing when he opened the door to his apartment, having to unlink their hands. His warmth grew cold in her palm.

"Just put the stuff up. It's self explanatory." He shrugged off a bag of groceries, and handed it to her.

"I'll be right back." He said as they went in. As he headed for the bathroom, he smirked. "I'm just taking a leak. Don't run off this time."

She nodded, taking the groceries and walking into his kitchen. She peeked through the cabinets, deciding what stuff went where. As she opened the fridge she stuck her tongue out at him. "I doubt that's what you were doing last time. Probably trying to drown yourself."

"Actually I wasn't." He said as he stepped into the bathroom. "I was beating the dog."

And then the door shut.

End Part Three.

AN: (SNORT) Yeah, I had to think of where to truncate this chapter. I decided this was the best point before it got excessively long. So, I estimated wrong… there will be another part! Whether that's a good thing or a bad thing is up to you. Blargh… I didn't realize how long this thing was—when I was estimating how long it was going to be at the beginning of the fic I had forgotten to include the entire shopping scene. Ah, well.

Hope you enjoyed. Next up will DEFIINTELY be the last part. And will be the reason the fic is rated M. (coughs)

Kay, it's 2:30 AM. Going to sleep now.

Reviews and comments appreciated.

Phoe-chan and Sekushi Shigure.