Honeymoon Hi-Jinks: Chapter 3: Epic Clash Number 37... in a row.

A/N: This chapter is a combined effort on the behalf of L1701E and myself. I hope you all enjoy. And read L's fic's. They're freaking awesome. (Ringing endorsement anyone?)

Disclaimer: Kid Razor and the Cavaliers belong to L1701E; Omega and Psylocke belong to Descendent. Every one else is owned by Marvel and is shamelessly used.

"You Irish Cops are really starting to perk up. That's two sound theories in one day, neither of which deal with some huge freakin' guy. Kinda makes me feel like river dancing." Willem Dafoe, The Boondock Saints

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Cleveland

"Oh crap." Mike muttered as he saw the flying object get closer. Kid Razor landed in front of Mike with a light thud on the ground. Mike held back a snicker as he looked at Razors outfit.

"You Mike Nagrite?" Razor scowled, looking at Omega and crossing his arms. "Wait… why do I have this weird feeling of déjà vu all over again?"

"Maybe. Who wants to know? The Ultimate Warrior, Version 4.0?" Mike snickered.

"What was that?" Razor growled, getting antsy. "I know you did not just diss the Kid of Rock's awesome costume."

"Oh. So that's what you call it." Mike chuckled with a smirk. "And here I thought you were just one of them retards that thinks they can wrestle." Mike taunted. "Look, junior. I got things to take care of…" Mike grumbled as he pushed past Razor.

"Ohhh…The Kid of Rock would like this kid's attitude if it wasn'tpissing me off so much." Razor thought. "Look, buddy. The Kid of Rock just wants to talk. Methinks there is some baaaaad mojo coming your way."

"I don't have time for this." Mike scoffed with a laugh as he looked at Kid Razor. "Heh."

"What's so funny?' Razor grunted as he stopped Mike.

"Listen. You can fly. Good for you. But I have more important things to deal with than some wrestling reject." Mike muttered as he turned to walk away past Razor.

"Hey. Hey! The Kid of Rock is talking to you, Slappy!" Razor snapped as he grabbed Mike's arm.

"Listen here, you fruit loop!" Mike snarled. "Back off!" Mike twisted Razor's arm, forcing the Cleveland hero to release him. Razor's green eyes started to glow with rainbow colors, indicating that he was royally ticked.

"Fruit loop? FRUIT LOOP!" Razor snapped. "That's it! NOBODY QUESTIONS THE KID OF ROCK'S SEXUALITY! NOBODY!" Razor screamed as he grabbed his guitar and lifted it into the air. The guitar's body started glowing with a rainbow-like aura.

"Ahhhh, me and my big mouth…" Mike muttered as he saw the guitar come at him.

"VAN HALEN HAMMER!" Razor screamed as he slammed the guitar into Omega, sending him flying through the side of a building. "That's what you get, you stupid mealy-mouthed punk!" Razor snapped. The smoke kicked up by the action started to clear.

"That all you got, you meatball?" Razor was amazed to see Omega walk out of the rubble as the dust was settling. Except for some rips in his clothes, he was completely unscathed. "If it is, you are seriously going to get hurt."

"This is going to be more fun than I thought…" Razor mumbled to himself with a smirk. "Really? And what are you going to do, you punk? Throw your piercing's at me?"

"Punk? PUNK? You have chosen the wrong day to pick a fight, paste-eater!" Mike screamed, face red with rage. Adrenaline began to pump throughout his veins. With a thought, his calcium whip-like tendrils were unleashed, and he sent them flying at Razor.

"Uh oh…" Razor thought out loud as he saw the deadly whips fly towards him. "Something tells the Kid of Rock that this was a bad idea. Ah well." Razor shrugged as he dodged the lethal barrage with the help of his superhuman agility and reaction time.

"HOLD STILL!" Mike shouted in anger, frustration, and impatience as he kept up the attack. Razor was trying to hold his balance, but even though Razor's sense of balance was as good as Spider-Man's, the whips were everywhere. "HOLD STILL, FRUITY!"

"Keep trying, you Doc Ock, knock-off! You're not just facing any random street punk here! You're facing the Heavy Metal Heartbreaker here!" Razor snarled. He pulled out what appeared to be a necklace with a pendant of a heart lined with chrome. He held it and his guitar up towards the sky. "HEART OF METALLICA!" Razor commanded. His body was engulfed in a strange steel aura. Within moments, he looked like he was sheathed in chrome.

"That's a nifty trick." Mike smirked as his tendrils now bounced off the steel-encased super-rocker.

"Thanks." Razor crossed his arms. "The Kid of Rock got this trick and the pendant that allows it from a race of metal-worshipping aliens."

"Still makes you a Fruit Loop, though." Mike cracked smarmily. Razor then started to charge Mike, his steel body changing back to normal, and fists charged with the Power of Rock.

"Eat fist, monkey-ass!" Razor snapped as he and Omega began to trade blows, the force of each blow shattering glass around them.

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Location Unknown

"Well…" Selene blinked as she watched Omega and Razor bash each other's heads in on a mystically created window. "Not quite what I had in mind. But it serves my purposes anyway."

"Selene…" The mutant sorceress turned around to see Shadow King standing behind her.

"What do you what?" Selene inquired in a bored manner as she blew on her nails.

"I was just checking in, to make sure all was going according to plan." Shadow King hissed.

"See for yourself." Selene pointed out with a drawl like she was explaining to a little kid. "Omega is busy dealing with my own problem. Psylocke is all yours."

"Excellent." Shadow King complimented. "And as agreed…" He produced a crystal. "A shard of the Gem of Cyttorak."

"Excellent." Selene smiled as she took the crystal shard and examined it. "Once Razor is eliminated, I can obtain his guitar, and then I can use this to try and finally harness the Power of Rock for my own use."

"Good for you." Shadow King grunted, not caring what the dark-haired woman wanted. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go meet a little ninja."

"You know, my dear Shadow King…" Selene started to offer. "Once I manage to harness Kid Razor's power source, I will own the world. I can have you rule by my side."

"…We shall see." Shadow King answered, shimmering out of sight. "But first, you must get the guitar." The Shadow King thought.

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Cleveland, a short time afterward

"OW!" Mike muttered as he went through another building. Kid Razor flew at him, guitar held high. "Why does getting hit with a guitar hurt so much?" Mike moaned as the mystical guitar slammed into his head. He rolled across the ground, and came up in a crouching position, the wound on his head slowly knitting together.

"Had enough?" Razor inquired cockily as he floated overhead, mystical energy radiating off of his form. Suddenly, a cell phone began to ring.

"One sec." Mike held up a finger as he stood up and pulled out his battered cell phone. "Man, I just got this thing." Mike muttered as he opened it, pressed a button on it and put it to his face. "Hello?" He asked as he answered it.

"Mike?"

"Hey. What's up X?"

"Problems?"

"Do tell." Mike grunted sarcastically. Meanwhile, Razor was getting slightly annoyed.

"We're having an epic battle, and he stops it for a phone call?" Razor sighed, frustration marring his voice. He then looked at Mike with a smirk. "I like that."

"So wait. Let me get this straight." Mike repeated everything X23 told him. "Pietro's near death, Lance is in the hands of the Shadow King, and Forge is a traitor? And you left Kitty alone in our house? No telling what she'll do!" Mike shouted into the phone. "Yeah, I am getting off topic here. Look, I gotta go. Ninjas kidnapped Betsy after we beat the crap out of Juggernaut with the help of his bastard kid, and now I'm busy fighting a Fruit Loop that looks like the Ultimate Warrior. No time to explain." Mike said simply. "I'll call later." Mike said as he hung up the phone. "Sorry about that. Where were we?"

"HERE!" Razor shouted as he slammed into Omega.

"Oh, right." Mike huffed as he grabbed Razor and flipped him into the ground, creating a small crater.

"Ow." Razor coughed, thanking God for his body's ability to handle physical punishment. He leapt out the hole and into Omega's solar plexus, knocking the mutant back. Meanwhile, neither of the two heroes noticed that Electro had snuck up on them.

"Ha." He smirked evilly "While they're busy, I can finally get my revenge." Electro hissed. He began to power up. Meanwhile, Mike and Razor went back to swapping blows.

"Hey..." Mike noticed Electro. "What's that wanker up to?" Mike pointed at Electro with his thumb.

"Him again." Razor muttered, rolling his eyes. "Listen, I gotta take care of something. The Kid of Rock'll be right back." Razor promised.

"Be my guest." Mike took a rapid gasp of air as he motioned at Electro.

"Thanks." Razor grinned as he flew over to Electro. The sound of a man being maimed, accompanied by electrical discharge and girly screams, echoed off the streets.

"Ooooh…he ain't pretty no more." Mike winced as Razor walked back, blood dripping off of his guitar. "All set?" Mike asked.

"Yeah." Razor answered with a nod, before Mike slugged him. "Ow…"

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Meanwhile, in an underground cavern, Betsy and the Cavaliers were trying to make the best of a bad situation.

"Seventy bottles of beer on the wall…" Tommy sang.

"God, shut up Tommy!" Alex snapped.

"Make me!" Tommy snapped back.

"Can I kill him?" Betsy asked innocently from her cage.

"If we can't, then you can't." Wendy mused dryly. "Although I have contemplated it before."

"Hey Bets. What if I was the last man alive, and the fate of the human race depended upon…" Fingers began before Betsy cut him off.

"No."

"What if…"

"No." Betsy answered again, more forcefully this time.

"Damn it." Fingers muttered as he slumped to the floor of his cage.

"Man. I wish Razor was here." Rip sighed. "He'd be able to bust us out."

"Same with Mike." Betsy agreed. "Stupid mystical runes." Betsy muttered before her cell phone began to ring. "You have got to be kidding me." Betsy blinked in amazement as she looked at the phone. "These runes stop us from using our powers, but not cell phone reception?"

"How many bars do you have?" Alex asked hopefully.

"Four." Betsy mumbled in a disturbed voice. "Hello?" Betsy asked as she answered the phone. "Wanda? I'll call you back later." Betsy said as she hung up the phone quickly. "I wonder…" Betsy started thinking as she dialed the phone.

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Cleveland

"Tired?" Razor asked, his breath coming in rasps. Even though Razor could go for a long time in a fight, Mike was really pushing him to his limits.

"Nope." Mike gasped. Both of them were sitting down, throwing rocks at each other weakly. Suddenly Mike's phone went off again. "God damn it." Mike muttered.

"Go for it." Razor snickered.

"Thanks." Mike said as he picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"MIKE!"

"BETSY!" Mike shouted, getting up. "Where are you? Okay. I understand. But…yeah. Well, I'm busy fighting with some guy calling himself the Kid of Rock." Mike explained. He pulled the phone away from his ear and winced in pain. Razor could hear the screaming, and he gave Mike a sympathetic look. "So he's a good guy? ...Oops." Mike muttered. "Yeah. He's here. Hold on a sec." Mike said as he walked over to Kid Razor. "Some guys called Rip wants to talk to you."

"Rip!" Razor exclaimed as he took the phone. "Hello, Rip? Selene captured you? I knew it! And his wife? Yeah. Okay. I guess." Razor shrugged. "Why? He called me a Fruit Loop, that's why!" Razor snapped into the phone. "NO! Don't give me to Wendy! Not her!" Razor shouted with a groan. "He gave me to Wendy." Razor muttered as he pulled the phone away from his ear and winced in pain, Mike hearing the screaming. "ALRIGHT!" Razor shouted as he hung up the phone.

"So…" Mike blinked as he took the phone back.

"So…" Razor mused, rubbing the back of his head.

"Truce?" Mike offered, outstretching his hand.

"Sounds good." Razor nodded, shaking Mike's hand.

"I still think you're a Fruit Loop." Mike muttered under his breath.

"I still think you're a punk." Razor muttered under his breath.

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Next time on Honey Moon Hi-Jinks: L1701E and I continue this strange trilogy, as Omega and Razor take to the underworld to try and find their lost friends and loved ones. Boy do I pity those thugs…

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Later all, you know what to do…

Peace out,

Descendent/ L1701E