DisclaimerOwn nothing HP. No need to sue.
About the Author: The Wonderful, Great Lockhart - ME
Hello wizards, witches, goblins, giants, Hippogriffs...or any kind of magical being you may be (though no more magical than me)! Now, now, don't be shy – I understand that the very thought of me (gasp) excites your me-obsessed mind, let alone the knowledge that I, Gilderoy Lockhart (Order of Merlin Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award) have actually written this very collection of parchments lying on your hands right now. Yes, thank you, I do try.
Well, as you can see from the title on this very page, this particular section of my book (A Comprehensive Guide to the Magic World) is entirely dedicated to, yes – you're right…ME! And I imagine that you, my lovely reader (though no lovelier than me), are now holding this delicately-sewn book (funded and published by the Official House-Elf Publishing Corporation) with great trepidation - Well…continue on! I have always personally enjoyed the thoughts of having my fans getting hypertension/hyperventilation over me. Ah! Time is ticking, ink is trickling…and I still haven't started on myself yet! Shall we begin with some little facts first?
I, Gilderoy Lockhart (Order of Merlin Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award, am born on June 16th of a fateful year Before Merlin (I won't go into detail as to exactly which year, as to I think not it will matter) in a luxurious castle built by one of the most renowned goblin architect at that time, Gruey Goblio. It was quite unfortunate that my dear mother, Princess Lily Hams Lockhart, died in attempt to deliver her beautiful baby – which was of course, me. For that reason, my father, Sir Wilfred Lockhart, who was knighted by Queen Hams on his twelfth birthday, treated me with special added care and love, just like a prince (yes, the royalty in my blood is undeniable). (sigh) I remember how my dad the dearest used to permit to practice my spells on our ugly, low-class house-elves…(no offense to the Official House-Elf Publish Co-op, of course)
Oh, speaking of spells, I know many of you fans have been wondering if the recent rumor that have been going around. Yes, it is true – I, Gilderoy Lockhart Order of Merlin Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award), have indeed earned myself exactly ten O.W.L.s during my senior year at Hogwarts. (sigh) What a proud Ravenclaw (NO, I was NOT a Hufflepuff in Hogwarts, as certain jealous, old classmates of mine have rumored) I was! I remember winning the House Cup for Ravenclaw consecutively for seven years…You cannot possibly imagine how popular I was back then in my school days (oh, but of course you can!). All in all, my school days bring me back quite some jocund memories. And I'm sure that you, my reader, would LOVE to know more about me (of course!), and trust me, you will, during my later chapters (e.g. how I won the Quidditch Cup by catching the Snitch within seconds, and how I fought off a vampire I've encountered on one of my journies, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera). I mean, really, how can I possibly write a book about the magic world and not include someone as important as myself?
Anyway, I have written this book in hopes that it will help newcomers from all over the world to enjoy and learn about the way us Londoners, as English muggles say, live life.
So, my dear reader, enjoy, and as I always say to my screaming fans, live life the Lockhart way.