Chapter I: Grisly Goblins of Gringotts the Grand

Disclaimer I do not own any magical creatures seen. Hmm, I actually did quite a bit of research regarding the history of Goblins, utilizing various sources.

A/N Thanks goes to Cori Aileen for being my first reviewer, and Sora. The Angel of Sky (cool name by the way) for adding me to her Favorites!

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As a newcomer to the Magic World, one must understand the two rules of survival. Number one – Don't ever irritate a goblin. Number two – Don't ever irritate a goblin working in Gringotts.

I still remember vividly (and lividly) to this day, the first time I ever came face to face with a goblin. It was, of course, in the Gringotts Bank, and I believe I was eight years old at that time (what a charming boy I was back then!) when I came with my lovely Aunt Lily. I have to admit, the very first thing that caught my young though inquisitive eyes was not that luxurious external structure of the snowy-white bank, nor the customers of bizarre countenances weaving in and out of the bronze doors, but rather a simple, delicately hand-written sign standing in the front door. The inscription read:

Enter, stranger, but take heed
Of what awaits the sin of greed.
For those who take, but do not earn
Must pay most dearly in their turn.
So if you seek beneath our floors
A treasure that was never yours.
Thief, you have been warned, beware
Of finding more than treasure there.

I'm assuming that you, my dear reader, might be wondering at this very moment right now how someone even as brilliant as myself is of the awing capacity of reading at the age of eight (gasp). Well…not to be showing off or anything, but quite frankly, I have known at a very young age that I was not like other kids (shakes head modestly) Honestly, the sniggers (my age) in my neighborhood were playing with their toy broomsticks when I was finishing my first sonnet! (shakes head modestly again) Afterall, I am a Order of Merlin Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and a five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award.

Anyway, to make things easier to understand, let me start by shedding some light on the goblin history:

Goblins have always been reputed to be very violent creatures, and have staged numerous uprisings in their history of relations with wizards (it was rumored that they're being oppressed by the Ministry of Magic – NOT a personal opinion). Many goblin rebellions took place in the seventeenth century. Their running of Gringotts seems to be part of the Ministry's philosophy of putting potentially dangerous creatures to work they work the best (just like the Dementors in Azkaban). So believe it or not, working at Gringotts is actually quite a suitable occupation for these pixie-like creatures with pointy, ears – since not only are they cunning and clever, they are quite greedy as well (putting the thieves with mischievous endeavors in a very dangerous position).

Oh look, the wonderful Lockhart even wrote down somenames of several historically famous goblins for you (yes, I admit I'm also a historian besides the brilliant man I already am):

Elfric the Eager

Eargit the Ugly

Alguff the Awful

Ug the Unreliable

Urg the Unclean

Gringott (wow!)

So as you can see, my dear reader, goblins are quite…useful creatures, you could say. And when they're not busy protecting the gold in Gringotts, they can be quite welcoming as well (unfortunately, the one goblin I first met in Gringotts was not the most benign…)

In short, Gringotts is the only known bank (notice I said the only known bank) of the wizarding world. It is, of course, primarily operated by goblins. Wizards and witches keep their money and other valuables in vaults so that they can be protected by the complex and strong security measures conducted by the goblins. It is rumored that dragons guard the especially high security vaults (I actually had the pleasure of seeing one before, since I am one of Gringotts' most prior customer, after all).

My final piece of advice for you, my newcomer to the magic world, is to take heed when making a trip to the wizarding bank – and remember…never make fun of a goblin's ears (as the result will be the most gruesomely horrible, and painful…trust me, I speak from experience gasping labouredly as painful memories flood back).

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A Wonderful Chapter Done by the One and Only – Gilderoy Lockhart (didn't you just love it?)