This is going to be a short one-shot collection with one-shots surrounding Wally's childhood abuse. If you want some more context for what's going on in this one then I suggest reading my one-shot collection "Wack: The Troublesome Twosome" which is a one-shot collection about Wally and Dick's friendship. (BroTP) For the most context for this one I'd read (in this order):

Chapter 19: Un prieten loial

Chapter 21: Secrets

Chapter 28: Christmas Past

You don't have to read them to understand this one, but they would definitely help with context. And if you'd like to see the timeline that pretty much all of my YJ stories take place on, check out my profile.

I'll also have Iris' perspective of this event posted on Wack later, so be on the lookout for that.

Hope you guys enjoy this one!

Rating: T

Time-line: Pre-season 1 (Wally is 13, Dick is 11)

Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Friendship

Summary: Barry finds out that Wally is being abused by his parents. Obviously, it's up to him to save the day. He just didn't count on having a panic attack after. Or on Batman helping him through it.

Word Count: 2400

Trigger Warning: Mentions of child abuse, panic attacks

Disclaimer: The panic attack that Barry experiences in this is purely based on my own experience with panic attacks and everyone's anxiety, PTSD, or panic or anxiety attacks look different. Please be aware that this is just my perspective, and that it can look different for every person, and their own individual needs when they are experiencing an attack. If you're a witness of somebody experiencing an attack, please ask them what you can do to help them, since everyone has individual needs.

Iris was up with the boys, taking them some snacks.

The police had finally left and Rudolph had been arrested.

The house was finally silent after the noise and chaos of the day.

Barry's mind was not.

As soon as he knew Iris had the boys handled and that as much of the legal stuff that needed to be done for the day was finished, he ran.

He was in costume because although that would draw attention, it wouldn't draw nearly as much attention as a civilian running around at superspeed.

He still had a secret identity to maintain.

His chest was heaving by the time he broke the sound barrier.

He felt dirtier than the worst criminals he had put behind bars.

What's worse is that this wasn't out of the blue. It made sense. The signs were there. Barry dealt with cases like this all the time as The Flash and at his civilian job.

So why hadn't he noticed?

His eyes burned as he crossed the state border.

Why was he so oblivious as not to notice when it was happening right under his nose to his own family?

The weight of the responsibility was crushing him. The same as when Wally had first gotten his powers. He remembered the guilt when Wally ended up in the hospital. He remembered the hurt look in Wally's eyes when he turned him down, telling him that he didn't want to the responsibility of having a sidekick. He loved Wally to death, but he still doubted himself on if he was doing right by him in training him as Kid Flash. And now, they'd- they'd have to raise him. He loved Wally. But that thought terrified him.

His breath hitched as he crossed another border.

He and Iris- they had barely been married four years. They were young. They weren't even old enough to have a kid Wally's age, nevertheless raise one. Their life was already so crazy between both of their jobs and him being a hero and training Wally. But raising a kid on top of that? The thought made him feel like he couldn't breathe. His heartbeat felt like it was thrumming like a hummingbird's.

Barry didn't know the first thing about being a dad. His dad was in prison his whole life and had passed away a few years ago. his mother was murdered when he was just a kid. Growing up in the system, you don't learn what having parents is like, and certainly not how to be one.

He felt so angry with himself for having doubts about Wally. He should be the one to be strong, for Wally to lean on and be reassured that everything would be alright. He should be able to raise him and give him a home so much better than the one he was just taken out of. He wanted to give Wally the world, but he didn't know how. He should be reassuring the kid that was at home with his aunt and his friend, who was scared, that there was nothing to be afraid of. But Barry didn't know how to when he felt so scared himself.

He didn't know if the saltwater stinging his face was from the coast that he was now running alongside, or if it was from the tears burning his eyes.

Why didn't he notice sooner?

Why didn't he feel prepared?

Why was he handling this all so poorly?

Why didn't he just know what to do?

Why couldn't he breathe?

A sob emitted from his throat, and he stumbled over his own two feet. He skidded to a halt but wasn't able to prevent himself from running into the side of the mountain that was in his path. He had slowed down enough that he managed to not kill himself from the impact, but he blacked out for a second, and his head wasn't the only thing screaming when he came to. He instantly knew that he had a concussion, but he could already feel his body starting to heal itself. He barely prevented himself from throwing up.

His body spasmed with a vibration as he shivered, curled up on the small secluded beach by the side of the mountain.

Another sob left his throat and he couldn't stop himself from hyperventilating.

He ripped his mask back, gasping for breath, one of his hands digging into the sand, while the other gripped his head. He curled further into himself as another vibration wracked his body.

He felt pathetic.

He wanted to be strong for Wally. For Iris. To know exactly what to do, but Barry didn't. He didn't feel like the hero that he played every day to go out and fight crime. He felt helpless. Like all he could do was sit there and spiral-

Another sob shook his body, the sand sticking to his wet face.

A hand grabbed his shoulder, and Barry gasped, nearly jumping out of his skin, managing to half push himself up. He coughed and hacked, having inhaled sand. The coughing left him more lightheaded and he still couldn't breathe right, and now he felt like he might pass out again. Another sob shook his frame.

He felt helpless.

"Barry," The deep voice sounded gentle and familiar. He had rarely heard that voice use that tone before though.

Barry didn't want this to be happening. He didn't want to be- to be this mess in front of Bruce.

Bruce was Batman. He was always calm and collected. He didn't break like this. He adopted Dick when he was younger than Barry was now. Barry knew he was weak. He knew he was pathetic. He knew that he needed to pull himself together, but he couldn't and it was all too much and he didn't want Bruce to tell him that too. He knew. Barry knew-

Another vibration wracked his body and wrenched a sob from his throat, as tears ran down his face, blurring his vision.

"It's going to be okay, Barry." An arm wrapped around his shoulder, pulling him to lean against Bruce.

Barry wanted to apologize. Apologize for being weak. Apologize for not keeping it all together. For not having the answers. For not being strong. He wanted to- He wanted-

He wanted to breathe.

He gasped again, choking on the breath, sand particles still stuck in his throat. He coughed, and wheezed, trying to get air into his lungs. His head pounded and his whole body throbbed painfully to his way-too-fast heartbeat.

"Just breathe, Barry."

Didn't he know Barry was trying?

He felt Bruce's chest expand and deflate, the breath he blew out ruffling Barry's hair slightly.

Barry's head was on Bruce's shoulder, and he had a death grip on Bruce's arm that was wrapped around his shoulders.

Bruce took another deep breath.

Barry tried to copy him and failed.

Again.

And again.

And again.

But finally, he was able to take a successful breath.

He felt Bruce's grip tighten a bit each time he shuddered, but he was able to mimic his breaths and bring his heart rate down from the panicked pounding it had been minutes before.

His body felt drained as he came off of the adrenaline high.

He wondered for a moment if he was still crying, but he noticed that the darkness wasn't just from the night, but also from the clouds that had fallen and were dumping rain.

Barry focused on slowing himself down.

On breathing.

The rain around him seemed to freeze and fall at a snail's pace. The nearby ocean was frozen, some waves mid-crash. The moment was silent. Barry shut his eyes, relishing the peace for that one moment before he heard the thunder crashing in the sky, and the pitter-patter of the raindrops, and the waves slamming against the beach and each other.

The moment was over.

Barry let go of where he had been holding Bruce's arm in a death grip, his arm limply falling into his lap. He didn't remove his head from his shoulder quite yet though.

He felt too exhausted to move and hold his head up on his own yet since his body currently felt like it was made of lead.

And he didn't want to face Bruce and the embarrassment surely awaiting him just yet either.

He almost felt too tired to care about the embarrassment of crying in front of Batman though.

Almost.

"Barry."

It was hard to discern the tone of Bruce's voice. Was he mad? Disappointed? Frustrated? Sympathetic? Barry couldn't tell.

"Barry," He said a little firmer than last time, shaking his shoulder slightly.

Barry had to fight past the lump in his throat before he found his voice to answer.

"What?" He asked. His voice sounded hoarse.

"Let's get inside. It's pouring."

Barry's brow furrowed. Inside? Inside where? He was on some random beach in the middle of nowhere with a mountain at his back. Where-?

Bruce stood up, hauling the speedster to his feet. Bruce shifted his arm to be under Barry's shoulder to support him. As embarrassed as Barry was he didn't think he would have been able to make it wherever they were going without the help. He had used so much energy in his freak-out that he could feel his stomach clench uncomfortably, ready to be fed again, even though the thought of eating anything at the moment made Barry want to throw up.

Mere yards away was a familiar entrance that took Barry a second to recognize.

The cave. He had crashed into the cave.

It used to be the Justice League's headquarters until its location was compromised and they built the Watchtower.

Barry hadn't been here in years.

The hanger opened and Barry must have spaced out for a minute because the next thing he knew, he was sitting on one of the hideous green couches in the den with his face buried in his hands. He dropped his hands and looked at Bruce who was crouched in front of him, only the crease in his brow and the look in his eyes giving away his concern.

It was then that Barry noticed that it truly was Bruce in front of him. He was in civvies. Not Batman. He's not sure if that made him feel better or worse.

Barry let out a watery laugh, ducking his head. He shook his head, cutting off the laugh. He didn't even know why he was laughing. "I can't do this, Bruce."

The couch dipped next to him and he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"You're not alone, Barry." He only looked up when he heard The Batman's voice seeping through. "We're going to help you get through this. I've already contacted the best lawyers I know, I have no doubt that you'll win the custody case-"

Barry shook his head. "I-" He took a shuddering breath, closing his eyes for a moment. "Bruce, I don't know if I can do this. Raising a kid? I mean, I failed Wally, Bruce. I should have noticed. I work with those cases every day! I should have- I should have-"

"Breathe, Barry," Bruce said, his grip on Barry's shoulder tightening.

Barry took a few seconds to steady his breaths again, before continuing in a broken voice.

"I love Wally, Bruce. But I just don't know if I can...I don't want to fail him again," he whispered.

"You will. Barry, you can't avoid failure. Do you think I've never failed Dick? I do, all the time and I know you know that." He growled slightly, seeing that Barry was going to cut him off. "Barry, there's no such thing as a perfect parent. And it's hard. I'm not going to lie to you Barry. What you're going through is hard. It's hard," he said, squeezing his shoulder tightly to emphasize his point. "Not everybody just gets parenting thrown at them out of the blue with no prior warning. But I know you and Iris can do it, Barry. Every parent fails their kid, but that doesn't make them a bad parent. It doesn't make you a bad parent. What defines you is what you do after. What matters is that you help him get through this. That you give him something better. Even with the failures, they don't outweigh you trying to do right by him, Barry. You love Wally and anyone can see that. But you're not going to be alone in this. Alfred and I will still be here to help you. Iris is here for you. The whole league is behind you in this, and we believe in you, Barry."

Barry gave another watery laugh, shaking a few more tears free from his eyes. "Didn't know that you did pep talks, Bats."

Bruce rolled his eyes. "Don't get used to it," he warned.

Barry just shook his head, as Bruce got to his feet. "Wouldn't dream of it," he said, as Bruce grabbed his arm, pulling him to his feet. Instead of letting go though, Barry wrapped his arms around Bruce in a hug.

Barry knew Bruce wasn't one for showing, well, any affection really. Nevertheless physical affection. But perhaps sensing how much Barry needed it, he returned the hug.

"We'll figure this out, Barry."

Barry pulled away, a shaky smile on his lips. "I know. I know," he said wiping the tears away with his gloved hand. "Thanks, Bruce."

Bruce nodded back at him.

Barry knew it was going to be hard.

So very hard.

But he felt a little more ready now, and less alone facing this new challenge.

He would be there for Wally to help him through this.

And now he was reminded that he had people who would be there for him too.

Thanks for reading. I hope you all enjoyed this one-shot. Feel free to review or PM me and check out my other stories.

Love you guys!

~SunshineGirl14